• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2022
  • offline last seen February 13th

Prince of Cavia


Guinea pigs are cool

Sequels1

E

Calm Sky and Sweet Cloud, two pegasi from Cloud Town, live in a world of endless sky. One day, they fly away from their home, hoping to find something different.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 18 )

While combining minecraft with MLP sounds like an awful idea at first, you have managed to write it slowly, but carefully, intruducing nice characters, good worldbuilding and a nice premise. Good job word-smith!

I see you chose to leave the minecraft aspects fully intact. Might limit what you can do in the future with the story, but I am excited to see what is next nevertheless! Good job word-smith!

11448730
Thank you for your comments, Rosa. I hope you will enjoy the rest of the story.

Hmm... so these are actual Human players. That is not what I expected. Has been done well though.

Three co-op having a barney over First Contact behaviour?:unsuresweetie:

Lesson learned: Don`t let normies enter your brony focused server.

A very short finale. I feel that a bit more could`ve been added about sweet cloud and her parents, but this was still good.

Ah, a setup thought method for a possible story, this?

Looks to have some very intresting possibilities, depending on how good you make the Builders visiting this particular Realm.

If one of them is IlMango, then Twilight will have trouble keeping up, and if one was direwolf, then only Pinkie would be able to keep up. :pinkiecrazy:

11451321
Thank you very much for the comments. I agree that I should have written more in this chapter, but I wanted to post it on friday, and had to completely rewrite it because I realized the original version won't fit into the sequel.


11451494
Yes, this story is a setup for a longer one that I'm going to write. I hope it will be interesting. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and thank you for your comments.

Great story! Can’t wait for the sequel! This story is interesting and worth investing in! Love it!

11456246
Thank you. I hope you will enjoy the sequel as well.

The creature went back to the pegasi. It was holding apples in its hand, as if trying to get pegasi to move closer. Calm Sky slowly moved towards the creature. She noticed her friend gesturing to her to stay, but Sky went forward anyway. The creature looked at the pegasus. It seemed that it wanted to befriend them.

Only befriend? Or is there more behind his intentions. There are two of them, after all...

"So, um… how about I call you Builder?" Calm Sky spoke to the creature. He did not seem to notice. Instead, he took out some strange tool, walked towards strange construction on one of the platforms and started breaking blocks. Blocks keep reappearing.

That should qualify as a yes.

"You know, Sky? I like to spend time with you, but maybe we should do something other than flying," said the pink pegasus with a white mane.

:rainbowderp:: "Heresy!"

Next day, the two pegasi woke up by dawn. They ate breakfast – a few apples they packed into saddlebags.

:ajsmug:: "Good choice, girls!"

"This was not built by a pegasus," said Sweet Cloud.
"It means we found aliens!"
"I don't see anything moving down there."
"Let's land and see what it is."

:twilightsmile:: "An exciting new discovery, and your first action is to explore it? Sounds good! Just be careful."

Calm Sky looked at the gift. "Dashie," she read the word written on it.
"Flutters," Sweet Cloud read her own. "It's probably how they refer to us.”

Heh.

To the surprise of the pegasi, she came back with a saddle.
Then, she jumped at Calm Sky. The pegasus quickly threw the builder off. "What are you doing?" she shouted at the builder with anger.

I had already wondering when they would try something like that.
Let's see how this works out.

"They want more cloud blocks. Let's get them some," said Sweet Cloud.
"All right…" said Calm Sky, with little enthusiasm.

Maybe turn this into a business!

It was a pixel art, an art piece common in Cloud Town. It showed a smiling pegasus with a blue coat and a rainbow mane. Calm Sky looked at it, and wondered: Who is this mare? Did the builders meet a pegasus before? Maybe they know more about them?

Something like this?
derpicdn.net/img/view/2019/4/16/2014261.jpg
Source.

They noticed a pair of guards on the lookout. One of the guards flew towards the mares. “You are Calm Sky and Sweet Cloud?”
“Yes. We need to see the mayor,” said Calm Sky
“You should. Entire town is looking for you,” replied the guard.

They're in so much trouble, aren't they?

“You should have thought about a better explanation. That is ridiculous,” said the mayor. He looked at Calm Sky’s father. “You should pay more attention to what your daughter is doing. It’s not the first time she disrupts the peace of this town.”

I warned you...

The stallion hugged his daughter. “I believe you.”
“Really?”
“Yes. I always thought there was something outside,” he said.

Maybe they should go together next time.


Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.

11471478

Thank you for all your comments. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. :twilightsmile:

11471474

Yes, this pixel art looks like what I imagined they had built.

I love the vibe i get from the worldbuilding here

Comment posted by uliman deleted Jan 23rd, 2023
Login or register to comment