Please Summon Responsibly
It was a beautiful, bright summer day in Pony Hills. That was the problem.
Applejack was entirely in favor of bright summer days in principle. She only got concerned when more of them decided to show up in a row than even Granny could remember. And as the grass yellowed, irrigation only doing so much, Applejack had decided she’d have to do something drastic to save her livelihood:
She'd asked for help.
Help, in this case, came in the form of a young woman, with the sort of thin, pale build that could stand to spend a few more bright days outside of the library, and a fine, calf-length dress that would really prefer if she didn't. Not for the first time, Applejack made a mental note to lend Twilight Sparkle a pair of overalls for the next time she wanted to help at Sweet Apple Acres. Possibly one of Apple Bloom's, and definitely when Rarity wasn't around to hear what Applejack was doing with one of her favorite models for "fashions befitting the urbane young lady."
Applejack still remembered her years in the Five Boroughs. She had her own thoughts about urbane young ladies, and Twilight didn't fit any of those molds. She barely fit her own mold right now, holding something clearly magical, yet looking as uncomfortable as the time she'd tried to help deliver a calf.
A wave got Applejack out of her head. She returned it, adjusted her hat, and jogged up to the farm's front gate just in time to meet Twilight there. "Howdy, Twi. Whatcha got there?"
Twilight gave the hunk of metal in one hand a wary look, her other toying with the attached chain. "The best I can offer, and that's after going through the junk the old librarian left in the basement."
Applejack looked over the object as she led her friend to the ritual site she'd prepared. The brass did look a bit dinged up in places, and the thing could use a good lick of polish. Going by the way it clanked a bit as Twilight moved, it was hollow. That just left one question on her mind.
"Are the holes supposed t' be there?"
Twilight sighed and nodded. "It's a censer. An incense burner." She nodded her head at the messenger bag by her side. "I picked up a few different scents at the spa. I figured you'd like the cinnamon, but I didn't want to assume."
"Much obliged." Applejack stopped in a clearing between the Galas and the Honeycrisps, trying not to shudder as she felt the grass crunch underfoot. "Well, here we are. Open sky, like you told me."
Twilight looked around, nodding. "It should work well." She kept looking, features shifting into a frown. "Where's the offering?"
After a moment, Applejack quirked an eyebrow and pointed at the only object in the clearing that wasn't a leaf or a twig. "Right there."
"What, behind the cider?"
"It is the cider."
Twilight opened her mouth a few times before finally saying, "Applejack, when I said the rite needed something precious—"
"Secret family recipe, small batch, aged seven months." Applejack knelt by the cider and gave the earthenware jug a fond pat. "This here's the top shelf, Twi. You said this is gonna be a negotiation. Well, I ain't doin' business with anyone who'd turn their nose up at the best I got."
Applejack had known Twilight long enough to know when she was gearing up for a lecture. She'd also seen the other woman learn how to stop herself. It took visible effort and a little tooth grinding, but Twilight let it go with nothing more than, "Well, we'll see how that turns out."
That got a smirk. "Granny always says th' old magic knows what it's doin'."
Twilight shook her head. "I still can't believe you of all people are turning to magic. I still remember when I offered to develop that mass-picking diagram last year. That look in your eye... I thought you were going to punch my head off."
Applejack's smirk only grew. “Twi, you only think I’m stubborn ‘cause you never met my pappy, may he rest in peace. But even he knew he couldn’t do it all by his lonesome, and he told me, ‘Jackie, when you gotta get help, get the best you can.’ That means family.”
After a moment’s thought, Twilight said, “But you asked me.”
“Family’s more’n blood, Twi. It’s who you trust." Applejack picked up a fallen leaf. The summer had barely started, at least according to the calendar, and the parched trees were already showing their suffering. "’Specially when it’s gotten this bad.”
“Fair enough, I suppose. This still seems like drastic escalation.”
“What’s drastic is this drought. Mac’s run the numbers an’ says we won’t lose the farm, but a bad harvest still means hungry mouths." Applejack crossed her arms and scowled. "I’m a farmer, Twi. If I ain’t doin’ everything I can to get people fed, I ain’t doin’ my job.”
“Applejack, this isn’t illusionary fireworks or gem dowsing. This is incredibly dangerous magic." Twilight's gaze drifted to the Starpeak in the distance, and the city on its side. "I was Queen Celestia’s personal pupil back in Halcyon, but then I decided to try reading ahead and summoning an efreet. Now? I’m a small-town librarian.”
“I thought you liked it here,” said Applejack.
“I do!" Twilight cried. "I'm literally happier here than I’ve been in my entire adult life, even if it took me a few weeks to realize that."
Applejack nodded, memories that had grown fond with time playing through her mind. "And t' stop threatenin' Pinkie Pie with cold iron."
"That was an entirely reasonable precaution." Twilight's smile fell away. "But the point stands, summoning a noble spirit isn’t something to be done lightly. Even magecraft marks the user.” Twilight held out her arms, as if to display the skin forever dyed the purple of her soul, the eyes that reflected stars at noon, the streaks of hair in her bangs that grew in different colors. "Old magic definitely isn't something you invoke casually."
That got a shrug. “Rarity likes to call it an ex-o-teek appeal.” Applejack put a hand on one cocked hip in a pose as exaggerated as her Prench pronunciation. Twilight didn’t laugh, but at least her smile came back. AJ returned it, then jabbed a finger at her. “‘Sides, yer the one who brought up summonin’. When I asked, I figured you’d just whip up a storm by your lonesome.”
Twilight shook her head. “I haven’t studied that kind of elemental manipulation, and if I do it wrong, I could end up sucking out what little water is left in your trees. I agree with trusting the professionals, it’s just…” She trailed off and looked to the ground, worrying at that streaked bang with one hand.
Applejack put a hand on Twilight's shoulder. “I’ll be careful, Twi.”
“I know you will. But—”
“Twilight!”
Both turned to see a blur of purple and green skitter through the trees. A lizardlike creature puffed for breath, the grass in front of its snout blackening dangerously before it reared and grabbed a scroll out of the grip of its coiled tail.
“Spike?" Twilight knelt down to accept the paper from the little dragon. "What is this?”
Spike scampered up the offered limb, ending up draped around Twilight's shoulders even as she and Applejack took in the sun-stamped seal of golden wax. “A letter from the queen!”
“Oh my goodness. She finally…" Twilight winced and turned to Applejack. "I'm sorry, I—”
Applejack waved her off. “Go on, now, Twi. I know you’ve been waitin’ for this.”
“It’s not like I want to leave." The scroll crumpled in Twilight's grip. She didn't seem to notice despite Spike's shocked cry. "I meant it when I said I was happy here.”
“I know." Applejack smiled and gave her an affectionate jab to the shoulder. "Like I said, family’s more’n blood. I bet Her Majesty has some plans for you studyin’ abroad 'round these parts. Jus’ gimme a quick how-to before you go.”
“There’s no set incantation. This is very old magic. Just light the censer and present your…" Twilight cleared her throat. "Er, offering. Just don’t be surprised if nothing answers. And even if it does—”
"Twiliiiiight," moaned Spike.
Applejack smirked. Little siblings were the same no matter the species. “I’ll be fine. Go on, you got bigger fish t’ fry.”
The other woman still looked divided for a few moments. Finally, she nodded, left the bag, and turned towards town. "Good luck, Applejack," she said, waving as she departed.
"You too, sugarcube." Applejack watched them go with a smile before returning her focus to the censer. "Alrighty, let's see what we're workin' with."
A bit of fiddling got the lid off, and the bag proved to contain not just a few boxes of fragrant, waxy cones, but also a lighter and a sheaf of notes in Twilight's precise handwriting. Applejack scanned through the pages until she found one with a sketch of the censer... or maybe a polka-dotted ball on a string. Twilight Sparkle was many things, but a talented artist wasn't one of them.
Still, the written instructions were straightforward enough, and a quick sniff settled on the cinnamon incense after all. Soon enough, Applejack had spicy smoke wafting out of the dented brass. Keeping it swinging at a gentle rate gave her body something to do as she thought about how best to present the offering.
She grinned as it hit her. This was hardly the first time she'd had to do this sort of thing, after all.
“Gitcher cider! Top shelf! Nothin’ better on a hot day than a cool glass o’ Granny’s Special Reserve! One jug for—” and Applejack verbally stumbled, remembering in the nick of time that she needed a bit more from the djinn than thirty bits. “For services rendered!” she said instead. “Step right up an’ have a swig!”
Nothing seemed to happen, but Applejack didn't let that deter her. Even as the sun beat down on the clearing, she kept belting out her best market day patter to the heavens above, and anywhere else that might have interested parties. Once she got to the end of her third repetition of the full routine—it wasn't like the Special Reserve needed much effort to sell—she found herself longing for a sip herself. Still, she just wiped the sweat off her forehead and drew in a breath to start over once more.
“So. This ‘cider.’” A scratchy voice sounded out that last word like a strange new fruit. “Any good?”
Applejack let the censer fall still and glowered. She'd figured some lookie-loo might have been attracted by her shouting, but she'd also figured it'd be a sibling. “Missy, this is Sweet Apple Acres. We don’t think good is good enough.” She turned to face whoever had been attracted by her efforts. “An’ the cider’s for…” She trailed off as she took in the girl.
In hindsight, she wasn't sure what she'd expected, even if she'd succeeded. It definitely hadn't been a trim figure with skin the color of a clear sky and a toga that faded to wisps of cloud at the shoulders and hemline (or whatever it was called on a toga. Knowing Rarity for years only did so much.) Glowing hair had never entered the picture, especially not locks that couldn’t decide if they were actually made of rainbows or just had all their colors, nor how the girl sat on a cloud of censer smoke as though it were one of Rarity's fancy couches.
After a few moments of stunned silence, the being rolled carnation eyes—not literal ones, thankfully—and said, “What, did you think it'd be some bare-chested guy with pecs the size of your body? There’s girl djinni too, you know.”
Applejack cleared her throat and told herself she hadn't been staring. “I can see that.”
“Not like most of the guys really look like that, anyway." The djinn's body suddenly swelled to absurd proportions, tensing muscles Applejack didn't think anyone even had. "They throw on illusions ‘cause mortals don’t try to push around someone who looks like they squish heads for fun." She rolled her eyes again as she let the image drop. "No idea why they all go for the curly little goatee, though.”
“So you don’t really look like that?”
That got a shake of the head. “Nah, this is the real me. I’ve got nothing to hide. So, what’cha need?" The djinn sprang up from the smoke with an eager grin, zipping about overhead so quickly that Applejack could barely track her. "Last time someone summoned me, we were fighting this zombie wizard, and I was throwing lightning at this flying whale skeleton, and it was all ‘Graaaaaah’ and I was all ‘Pew! Pew pew pew!’ and I got a ten percent cut of the loot after the wizard exploded in this huge, green fireball!”
“Uh…" Applejack scratched the back of her head. "What’d you even— Never mind that, I jus’ need a quick favor, is all.”
The djinn went limp, drifting down until she was only a few inches off the ground. “No zombies?” Her look of disappointment rivaled Apple Bloom's worst puppy-dog eyes.
"N—" After a moment, Applejack said, “Well, might still be a few in th’ Everfree, truth be told.”
The djinn beamed like the sun coming out from behind a cloud. Even her hair glowed more brightly. “Really?”
“Could be. Plenty o’ old, bad magic in there goin’ worse. Timberwolves, manticores, whatever the Fair Lady Butterfly's adopted this week." Applejack scuffed her right foot twice and spat over her left shoulder, as was only right when mentioning the local fae.
That gave her a moment to see just how excited she was making the spirit in front of her. AJ hadn't seen eyes that wide or a grin that big since Pinkie got an oven mitt signed by Puffed Pastry. "All that aside, no one's seen any zombies since Granny was my age.”
The grin took on a sinister edge, helped by cracked knuckles and flying sparks. “Wanna go make sure?” said the...
Applejack frowned. "Don't s'pose I can get a name? Don't wanna jus' call you 'djinn' the whole time."
"Oh! Sure." The djinn held out her hand. "Rainbow Dash, zombie exploder extraordinaire."
“Applejack." A tingle ran up her spine through the handshake. Definitely just the lightning. "An' while I appreciate the offer, it's best not to go pokin’ that hornet’s nest. Just need a wish, is all.”
Rainbow Dash seemed to freeze for a moment. Her smile stiffened into a grimace. “A wish?”
“Yup." Applejack raised an eyebrow. "That a problem?”
She'd only known Rainbow Dash for a few minutes, but she was willing to wager that biting her lip was one of the djinn's tells, to say nothing of her eyes darting from side to side. “W-well, first I gotta see if that stuff is worth my time." Rainbow jabbed a thumb at the cider. "I mean, you’re offering me a jug.”
“It’s what’s in th’ jug that’s important.”
“Uh huh. Sure." Rainbow looked around the clearing, "You got any glasses?”
Applejack shrugged. “I figured a ‘noble spirit’ would be a bit prissy, but all that talk o’ fightin’ flyin’ bone whales had me thinkin’ you weren’t that soft.”
“I’m not soft!” Rainbow had a shout like a thunderclap, but she was much more predictable.
Applejack smirked. “Prove it.”
The djinn scowled at her and, without breaking eye contact, snatched the jug off the grass, tugged out the cork with her teeth, spat it aside, and poured a slug down her throat.
Then she looked away, visibly awestruck as she turned to the jug. “Whoa.”
“Hang on ’til the afterburn,” Applejack told her, still smirking.
“The wh—" Rainbow dropped out of the air altogether, her hair flaring and flailing like Granny's stories of the Northern Lights. "Whoa.”
“Yup.” Applejack sat beside her, taking the jug out of numb fingers.
“What’s in this stuff?”
“Apples." After a swig of her own, Applejack added, "Well, mostly apples. Satisfied?”
“I… You really shouldn't... It's...” Rainbow trailed off, unable to look away from the cider.
Applejack moved it back and forth a few times, watching the djinn's eyes track it. “I’ll take that as a yes. So, I wish—”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Rainbow zipped back into the air, waving her hands like she could wipe away the wish before she heard it. "Look, wishes are a big deal, okay?”
Applejack gave her a flat look. “Y’know, I already had a friend gimme a lecture me on how this was a bad idea. Didn’t expect a second one.”
“Well, your friend got it right. Wishes basically punch reality in the face and dare it to do something about it.”
That got a shrug. “So? You look like you got a mean right hook.”
“I mean, I don’t wanna brag,” said Rainbow, clearly wanting to brag. She shook her head. “But I… It’s… I can’t just…”
The answer was clear, much as Applejack didn't want to see it. She sighed. “You can’t grant wishes, can you?”
“Well, strictly speaking..." Rainbow looked away, cloud toga darkening to gray as she sulked. "Not like I said I could,” she muttered.
Applejack shook her head. "Don't that beat all. What kinda cockamamie—”
“Hey, I’ve heard about your freaky queen!" The djinn swooped down and jabbed a finger at her. "Can you raise the sun?”
“That ain’t here nor there!” spat Applejack, swatting away the hand.
“It so is! Wishes are some of the most powerful magic out there. If every loser drifting through the Great Sky could grant them, we’d have torn the place apart before I was even formed! Besides, the whole point of summoning is getting me to show up by offering me something I want. You think I wouldn’t just wish for that cider if I wanted it?”
“Ain’t like you ever had it before!”
“I’d just have to wish for the most delicious thing ever! Done!”
That caught Applejack short, though it was a good batch. Must have been awfully strong too, going by how it already had her flushed. “W-well…" She shook her head and rallied. "What good are ya, then? Dang layabout, tryin’ to skim a drink for nothin’!”
Rainbow drew back, toga gone storm cloud-black as lightning crackled through it. “Layabout!?" She pointed at the farmhouse. "I could blow that dumb place off the map! I could throw thunderbolts until you were extra crispy! I could call up a monsoon that’d turn this whole stupid town into a lake!" She crossed her arms as she descended, a storm building around her. "And you know what!? Maybe I—”
“You can make it rain?”
That made her blink. “Um, yeah? Obviously." Rainbow looked down. Applejack didn't remember grabbing her hands, but she let go now, both of them turning away. "Wait, is that all you wanted?”
The awkwardness didn't do anything to stop Applejack from turning back and nodding eagerly. “Sure do. We’re in the middle of a real bad drought, and we might lose the harvest.”
“Oh. Huh. Well then." Rainbow puffed out her chest and grinned. "Great news! You summoned the best cloudscaper on Emir Wind Rider’s staff!”
Applejack needed a moment to process that. “I summoned a gardener?”
“What?” Rainbow sputtered. “Just a— I manage the biggest—” She rallied and pointed an accusing finger at Applejack. “Well, you’re a farmer.”
That got a casual shrug, which seemed to rile Rainbow even more. It’d be cute, if Applejack were the sort of person who called people (were djinni people?) cute. “I ain’t complainin’. Just didn’t think noble spirits had t’ work for a livin’.”
Rainbow snorted. “Buddy, I could tell you stories.”
“I’m all ears." Applejack shook the cider jug. "An' I do owe you. But not ‘til after we get th’ orchard watered.”
“Yeah, yeah. How much are we talking, anyway?" Rainbow jerked a thumb at the trees. "Is it by this forest?”
Applejack looked at the trees, then the djinn, then thought about what a place called "The Great Sky" implied. "You have no idea what an orchard is, do you?"
"Of course I do. It's a cloudbank where you shape the vapor into something edible."
"Not 'round these parts. It ain't by th' forest. It is th' forest."
That got a concerned look, followed by Rainbow floating up higher and taking a look around. Then even higher. Then even higher...
Eventually, she came back down, all flippancy lost. “Okay, if we’re doing this, I’m going to need at least two more jugs of that stuff.”
Applejack smiled. Magic may not have been her thing, but business negotiations were a lot more familiar. “Call this’un a down payment. You’ll get to wet your whistle after my trees do." She raised an eyebrow. "Unless you ain’t up to it.”
A bit of playfulness came back to Rainbow's expression. “Pssh. You sound like the chamberlain. Watch me.”
Applejack did. Among other things, she had to supervise to make sure Rainbow didn't wash away the topsoil in her enthusiasm. That and chew out the djinn when she started whining or napping on top of one of her rainclouds. But it was the fun kind of chewing out, and Applejack could tell Rainbow was having just as much fun getting her goat.
As Celestia lowered the sun, Applejack looked at the acres with swelling pride. Mist danced in the evening light, and she could feel the gratitude and relief flowing through trees and land both.
She nodded to the one who'd made it possible. “Much obliged, Rainbow. You can get goin’ now.”
The djinn shrugged, reclining at eye level with her. “Yeah, I guess.”
Applejack blinked. She hadn't really thought about this part. She hadn't thought she'd need to. “Uh, do I gotta say it more formal-like?”
That got a confused look. “What do you mean?”
“I’m tryin’ to dismiss you." Applejack made her best attempt at mystic passes, which probably looked more like trying to swat a fly. "Begone, o mighty spirit. Return from whence ye came.”
“Oh!" Rainbow's face lit up with understanding before she leaned back on thin air. "Nah, it’s cool here. Definitely better than remolding the nimbus maze for the umpteenth time.”
Applejack just stared at her.
The silence stretched on until Rainbow frowned. “What, don’t you like hanging out?”
“It ain’t that I don’t like it, I just figured I had a say in when it was over.”
“I mean, I can go.” And with that, Rainbow puffed into smoke, vanishing in the breeze.
Applejack let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding. “Phew.”
“But.”
“Gah!" She jumped back, turning to see the djinn reforming behind her. "What in tarnation!?”
Rainbow leaned close. Too close. Not close enough. “You reached out to me soul-to-soul,” she murmured. How in Tartarus did that scratched-up voice sound so good when she was that quiet?
She pulled back a little, holding a length of Applejack's own hair, now sporting a sky-blue streak. Only then, close as they were, did AJ really notice the freckles dusting Rainbow's once-unblemished face. “That’s what a proper summoning is,” she continued, still trying to sound soft. Applejack needed more of her trying to sound soft. “Not like that guy who just called in any random djinn for the zombie fight." She pulled back, a cocky grin on her face. "Besides, you get to hang out with me. I sure don’t see the problem.” She looked Applejack up and down, biting her lip, and then stared up at the trees. “I mean. Unless you do.”
“I ain't really complainin'! Yer good company—" Applejack bit her lip before she could build up speed to a full-on ramble. "It's just no one told me ‘bout this part.”
“Didn’t you say a friend was trying to warn you about this?”
The quiet in the clearing felt a lot louder.
“Maybe." Applejack cleared her throat. "Might've… had her go before she finished.” She nodded stoically, just to let the world know that if it looked like Applejack had made a mistake she was actually handling everything completely fine. “Oughtta go see what all that was about,” she added casually, because everything was handled and there wasn’t any real need for urgency.
Rainbow matched her nod for nod. “Right. Sure. Everything’s cool.”
“Sure as sunrise.”
“Yup.”
“Eeyup.”
Anyone who claimed they raced out of the Acres like startled rabbits was a rotten, filthy liar.
The trip into town was a touch more awkward than normal, what with Rainbow hovering by her side asking about all the "weird dirt people stuff" they encountered along the way. Oh, and also the eyes of people who had known Applejack all her life locked on the blue streak in her hair. She tried not to hear the rumor mill start turning, or to think about what it might churn out by tomorrow.
"And how come all your buildings are on the ground, anyway?"
Rainbow, bless her heart (or whatever she had for one) made that a little easier.
Still, Applejack eventually made it to the town library—never mind how that tree was getting watered—and threw the door open without bothering to knock. "Alright, Twi, we need t' sit down an' finish that... talk..."
"Whoa, trees get big enough for buildings? Why bother cutting them down if—" Rainbow cut herself off once she took in the same sight that had silenced Applejack. "Oh. Hot."
Twilight, for her part, blushed as red as one of the streaks in her hair. It, along with the yellow one, matched the flaming tresses of the young lady next to her, who just grinned at the newcomers, an arm draped over the librarian she'd been locking lips with a minute earlier. She literally glowed with happiness, the purple starburst under one eye a vivid counterpoint to an outfit that was equal parts leather, bronze, and heat shimmer.
"Um. So. Applejack. Miss Djinn." Twilight cleared her throat and finished buttoning her blouse. "This is, um, Sunset. The efreet I mentioned. We've known each other for... some time. And were celebrating Queen Celestia's decision. Spike's helping Rarity. I'm babbling. Can we help you?"
"Yeah, we, uh..." Applejack swallowed, which did little against the lump in her throat. "We had some questions about, uh, long-term effects."
Sunset's grin only widened. “Twily, are you matchmaking? Cadence must be so proud.”
Twilight buried her face in her hands. "Please, not now, Sunset."
"Um, I mean, you are pretty awesome," said Rainbow, who was very carefully looking at a corner of the reading room that didn't have anyone in it.
Applejack could only sigh. "I stepped in it good and firm, didn't I?"
"Speaking as the other side of the relationship?" Sunset leaned her head on Twilight's shoulder. "Today, you've made the best bad decision of your life."
And in the years to come, Applejack would find she had to agree.
The original idea was just getting help with the harvest, but I couldn’t justify Applejack turning to magic for something that relatively minor.
“… Seriously? You could wish for anything, anything at all, and you just ask for a hired hand?”
“Ain’t nothin’ good came of tryin’ to get somethin’ fer nothin’.”
“You’re literally trying to solve your problems with a magic wish.”
“You gonna help or not?”
Fluttershy is indeed meant to be the Fair Lady Butterfly. Always observe the appropriate courtesies with her. Especially if her husband is around.
And this is definitely another example of me coming up with a hundred-thousand-word idea and barely scraping the surface. Sorry. 
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I speak for everyone- er, Pony- when I say… please do more! This is great stuff!
"You know, normally if you ask a Djinn to bring rains I'd be surprised if there was any part of your farm left standing at the end."
"Yeah. But then there'd be no more cider."
Lovely little story, and yes, it deserves to continue.
Even when the species change, Rainbow and Applejack continue to bicker.
This deserves so much more! Bring on that iceberg!
Another very fun AU from you. I wonder why Twilight did her ritual in the first place. Probably to get a second advanced magic tutor. And the bit with her thinking Pinkie was fae was icing on the cake.
I like it, another!
*smashes glass*
Oh wow, this is good. Very, very good.
If you ever continue this, I will read it with great pleasure!
Hilarious, adorable, and perfectly in character for characters that are wildly different versions of the characters. Bacon as the Efreet was an amusing twist, and it has me wondering if Cadance might be an Earth Genasi (crystals, after all!) that Shining Armor accidentally summoned one time…
Delightful work as always, FoME.
What a fantastic start to a new AU. I'd have to echo the general agreement that it definitely deserves more.
You, my friend, are an absolute madman and genius
Epic work, my friend!
This was awesome and fun and I should've known Sunset Shimmer was the efreet, but dang if that ending didn't make me laugh
Ya' managed to get a whole lot of world building in with under 5k words. That takes skill.
The ending really got me too. Good stuff.
I absolutely love every single thing about this story.
More tales from this reality please?
Hee hee hee! Those last three paragraphs were a very good & fun ending.
imho, that stuff in this story is already a lot of fun for people who can read between the lines.
11434496
thinking she was fae, you say?
Yeh, you still have to disappoint my decision of first favoriting and updooting and then reading your stories.
If you keep this up, i don't see it happening any time soon either.
Hahahaha perfect! And as always, you leave us wanting so much more.
A lovely little fic, bravo. n_n
Like everyone else, I quite enjoyed it. (The Pratchett reference was a nice touch.)
Are djinni canon?
Whelp, I certainly wouldn't say no to some more of this setting
Well, it's definitely an intriguing world and a fun story, but... well, this is probably just me, but the romance elements felt a little... well, not exactly tacked on*, since it wasn't really prominent enough to be considered as such, but... it like it had a few moments sprinkled in a couple of places and that was it. It didn't really feel like either an integral or a necessary part of the story.
To be honest, I feel like it might work slightly better without it, since... I kinda feel like that sort of soul resonance shouldn't have to mean a romantic connection, since other kinds of connection can be just as deep and powerful. Admittedly, while I don't consider myself opposed to the ship, I'm definitely not a proponent either, so I may not be the right audience, but... I dunno, it just felt a little... off.
I probably didn't do a good job explaining my feelings and I apologize for that and, if necessary, for them, just trying to put them into words.
*the stuff with AJ and Dash, that is. The last part... well, that was, in a sense, tacked on, that was sort of the point - that it came as a surprise - and, as such, works great for the humour.
11434658
I feel like the people who downvoted this comment didn't read it properly.
That is quite a nice story, too bad its a just glimpse of a larger and crazier world.
11434967
I've never actually heard about a djinni before, but now that I do, I say that the tree of harmony should count as one after it gains the ability to communicate with the characters.
11435006
Reading Comprehension is becoming a lost Art it seems . .
Great story and interesting concept, that requires a sequel.
11435157
Perhaps it might have been clearer if you said, "You still have yet to disappoint..."
But then, I suppose proofreading is a bit of a Lost Art...
11435343
In my somewhat racist defence:
i am german.
OH my god! So unexpected and timely! I was focused on summoning stuff, and this just arrives and has a magical description of summoning and MLP and stuff! So awesome!
...
So many romance-y hint lines like that and more!
...
All the classic ships! Sweet!
Oh, the Fair Lady Butterfly's already married! Wow.
...
Pony Skin colors explained in this Siderea! ... And this land is named for Sidereal? A.k.a Starry? Why call it that?
So, the three older "siblings" of the CMC are here, and we know that Apple Bloom exists... CMC-style shenanigans in this world are gonna be more dangerous?
So, did Sunset and Twilight just get married? Or is it that Sunset's just approved to basically immigrate to Pony Hills or something?
Dang OPs, spending all the big ticket story ideas on oneshots
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I think they needed more time to develop the chemistry to justify the payoff of the ship, but oh the woes of a oneshot. It definitely felt like it was going in that direction but I also felt almost nipped in the bud at how fast it ended and we were handed the payoff. Likely just the woes of a longfic reader tho lmao.
Damn these special change fics are elite, love this one!’
Yeah jerk this was too good to be a one shot. All the hinting at the magical mechanics and how it's mutated the world sounds awesome. I also want some more of the djynn life, how does clouds equal food? I though djynn were fire elemental subtypes not air. Also ffff alot of those descriptions sounded awesome of your characters I wish I could see them.
11435911
Big facts f ponys I want these magicy human summoning bois
I love all the races give me more character bonuses.
Very fun. The problem I have with FOME is every one shot he makes is in a universe I want to see tons of stories in. Your too good at your job
11436512
Yes! I would love to see some djinn romance
There's so much worldbuilding here I'm still trying to see if there's at least another three chapters.
Really great story :)
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I can't promise anything, but if inspiration strikes, I'll happily revisit this world. If nothing else, I can certainly whip up some blog posts to help others explore it.
11434442
It's a very pony solution to natural disasters: Make the cause of the disaster like you too much to create them in the first place.
11434464
Some truths transcend such minor concerns.
11434496
My thinking was that Twilight summoned Sunset at least in part to prove that she was responsible and capable enough to handle some knowledge that Celestia insisted she wasn't yet ready for. Naturally, she proved the opposite, and true to form, Tia put her in time-out for a bit. A much less extreme banishment than some Celestia has performed over the centuries, but the lady does love a good banishment.
(And yes, 11434604, Pinkie is not a fae creature. Even the fae don't know what's up with Pinkie. She doesn't show the slightest sign of magic use, yet she's still Pinkie Pie.)
11434578
I hadn't really pinned down what Cadence's deal is, but that's a tempting path to take. With some... curious implications for Flurry Heart.
11434595
There was a fair bit more that the prereaders cut out, and for good reason. The main reason I asked for so many eyes on this one was to strike the right balance of exposition and actual story.
11434967
The closest we've gotten to any kind of elemental is from the tie-in TTRPG Tails of Equestria. And possibly timberwolves, depending on how you interpret them. And maybe Discord, though he's more Outer Planes than Inner going by D&D logic.
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It's a fair point. Going from first meeting to happily ever after in under five thousand words is a breakneck pace for any reasonable romance, and soul-bonds need not translate to eros. The Appledash elements emerged organically as a "You know, this would be neat" idea rather than something I intended on from the beginning, so I'm not surprised it didn't work for everyone. I do appreciate the criticism; it'll help with future shipteasing.
11435699
Well, when the nation's ruler(s) move(s) the sun and moon... (Note: I have not fully decided how Luna works in this setting.)
Scootaloo idolizing someone who doesn't even have bones to break will definitely be an issue.
As Dash demonstrated, summoning removes most of the issues with a long-distance relationship, even one that stretches across multiple planes of existence. The letter from Celestia basically let Twilight know that she's out of time-out.
11436510
Very glad you enjoyed it this much! "I want this over ponies" is quite the praise indeed.
A fruit-bearing plant concentrates sugars into specific bits of itself that are designed to be detached and eaten. Cloud orchards work the same way, but with magical energy.
I borrowed from the D&D interpretation. Djinni and efreeti both work very differently in the original Arabic folklore.
11434578
In the original Arabic, humans filled the role normally served by an earth elemental. D&D's Dao read somewhat differently when you know about this.
11437342
"I, who am created from smokeless fire, will not bow down before one made from clay!" -- Iblis
This is a very amusing fic, though the shipping side of it feels a bit tacked on--not enough to bring down the whole fic of course, but still enough to make note of it. Of course, it might just depend on one's own shipping tastes...but I am a believer that not every story idea must ultimately lead to some kind of ship, and I wonder if the shipping was really the right thing this story needed...
...then again, maybe it's just the addition of the Twilight/Sunset overdoing it for me, because admittedly, the AppleDash does seem like an obvious route to take this...
...eh, the real point here is that this was a fun fic, with a clever premise, and some nice world-building--all of the right traits I typically look for in a fic.
I would personally be down for a whole series of stories about the whole group being our being attached to Djinn. It could be the alternate take on how they become saviors of Equestria.
This was a cute story.
This was a lot of fun. AJ's summoning was a hoot.
Sehr schön hoffe auf mehr ! besonders wie Rainbow Dash auf Pinkie Pie reagiern würde!
Oooh, I love it. Would definitely love to see this expanded upon.
literally in love with this AU
I kinda want to see more of this AU. Looks extremely interesting.
This was a wonderful little bit of fun.
I can see it.