• Member Since 11th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen September 8th



Often, when considering history, it is easy to dissolve it into merely dry facts and dates. Sometimes, however, the actual events, never written down, have a weight all their own.

--A collection of side stories to A Brief History of Equestria that would not fit the scope of the in-universe book.--

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 116 )

Soooo.... Yeah, a piece to the Luna -> Nightmare Moon puzzle. Personally I think she was possessed by some sort of thing, as per Word of Faust. However, a lot of folks (and partially supported via implication in Luna Eclipsed), say that it was all Luna, who went a bit crazy. This idea is a compromise of the two. I'll leave it to the reader to decide how far the influence(s) go either way.

Now, just to be clear, Estelnehtar has no real will of (or capacity to act on) its own. A good analogy of how it works in terms of corrupting Luna would be like how carrying a lump of plutonium in your pocket will eventually give you cancer. This is opposed to the One Ring, which actively corrupts people and can act on its own.

Now, this particular character has always had a lance infused with the Rainbow of Darkness, I just never gave it a name until recently when it clicked in my head that 'Hey! That might be neat!' And of course when I posted an early take, someone suggested that this guy's stuff become part of NMM's armor. At first I brushed it off, but as I began to think of this part of the story, once again it clicked as a neat idea.

One last thing: Tolkien had his Mithril, Marvel Comics/Stan Lee has Adamantium, and I have Aptare as my entry to Mythical Magical Metals. The word is latin, "to make fit," and its properties are pretty much what I described above: a metal that, when added to large pieces of works during the smithing process, takes on the properties of the metal it is being integrated with.

EDIT: ALSO! Estelnehtar's poem, vocals by yours truely. Audacity is awesome. ^_^

Ohhhhhh~ Now this was awesome K9 :rainbowkiss:

I love this. I must get my word in before this is featured. I tip my hat to you, good sir or ma'am. Here, have a mustache- :moustache:

God what happened to Talonhoof that made him such an evil bastard?:twilightoops: I vaguely remember reading a comment back in "A Brief History" that Sullamander may or may not be considered a complete monster, and then you said someone worse would be coming. Are you talking about Talonhoof, or should we expect someone else?


My thanks good sir. :moustache:



If you promise not to share, I'll clue you in: Yes. Yes he is.

Oh, damn. I really wanna hug Luna right now, especially after the jeering and booing. *Shakes fist* Talonhoof's Spear... damn.


Well, I suppose it was less jeering and booing and more "AHHH!!! SHE'S CALLING DISCORD! EVERY MARE FOR HERSELF!!!" If you think the reaction of parents to Rock 'n' Roll in the 1950's was overblown and rediculous, imagine how the populous would react in the 950's! Metal may be awesome, but note that neither the modern nor the original sense of the word 'Awesome' implies that the emotion is a pleasent one.

Yep, Estelnehtar is quite a piece of work. A masterpiece really.

Ponified "Rule Britannia"? Count me in.

Awesome of you to do actual lyrics and anthems for the Three Tribes. It makes it so... real!

I think I liked Rule Celestine best.

Okay, on TVTropes in the Wild Mass Guessing page for Celestia and Luna, one of the early guesses concerned the memetic Tyrant Celestia, in essence saying that Tyrant Celestia is canon, in that after Nightmare Moon 'Tia... didn't cope all that well. However, it is backstory and she has long since grown out of that phase. So I'm running with that idea. And since this whole project runs on the idea that Equestria's long long history is somewhat unknown or foggy to most of the citizens aside from Twilight (not unusual, most high school grads don't know what happened in US history inbetween Lincoln's assassination and the Spanish-American War [hint: Not Much]), this can explain why Twilight was so much more paronoid about what Celestia would do to Fluttershy for kidnapping Philomena (and how her formally meeting the rest of the Mane 6 would go) than the rest were: She knew how Celestia ran things in 1000 years ago! Granted even at her worst Celestia would only jail Shy for a month or so, then force her to take an Exotic Wildlife course as opposed to laughing it off. But still, Tyrannous Sol was not a being one triffled with.

So anyway: In the years since Luna's return, a genre of music she developed before the nightmare, Metal, has risen in popularity in Equestria, who have now developed the cultural context to except it and enjoy it. One group, Stableton, inspired in part by A Brief History of Equestria (:twilightsmile:) wrote a song about Celestia's fall to Tyranny, the above.

So, in short, Celestia got really depressed after Nightmare Moon and had a brief fling as a dictator... That actually makes sense


And anger, can't forget that.


Yeah, I can see that. She blames everyone else... except Luna.


Well, it's not like the court was guiltless... :trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:

Nice twist on the airborn troopers martching song

Dang. Helluva way to go! Awesome adaptation, there.

Private Pansy was awesome. And apparently good at making lyrics. I imagine she had a good singing voice :)

I could live by this... :rainbowdetermined2:

Yeah. Good advice, there. Hard-won by experience, no doubt.

Okay, I saw the video linked in the story above, inspiration struck, and I just had to do it. This story is basically to ponies what Romeo and Juliet is to us. With a good dash of Frollo and Esmeralda kneaded in too. So the question remains: Is this Hunchback subplanted into R+J? Or is it R+J with family feud replaced with genocidal hatred? I dunno, but it sure is fun! ^_^

Another source of inspiration that may or may not be actual inspiration, is our own Harry Leferts. We've been PMing each other discussing what would happened should the Founders wind up in modern Equestria. Harry suggested that Platinum would become a successful period mystery thriller novelist, and I'd say that's too awesome not to use. So there's that.

Now then, who wants to wager how long it'll be until someone decides to make a full script of this version of The Fall of Calli Flower? :trollestia:

OOH! Also, A Brief History of Equestria has a Tropes Page, and since these are part of that continuity, any tropes found here apply for that page as well. So have at it! ^_^

Not bad, not bad at all. An interesting blending of source materials.

Of course no one can really top the Late Tony Jay's performance of Hellfire in my mind (or heart). His voice work is forever embedded in my childhood.

Nice. Not... much more I can say. I like the idea of Platinum using this to vent her feelings. Celestia knows she's got a... lot to say on that matter! :duck:

Got a Snuggie for Christmas, and it's brown. When I don't look like a colorblind Sith Lord I feel like a monk transcribing historical documents in a monastery as I type these stories.

In effect, this story was inspired by the Lady Antebellum song Just A Kiss, so I'd recommend listening to that while reading, if you so desired.

Anyway, the big questions:

Yes, Collard Green is Hurricane's. He saw Fresh Clippings serving drinks while attending a little party at Platinum's in 2 AW and, well, you know the story. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Yes, she was living at the palace, and in the service of Platinum. Yes, she lived in the Kingdom of Unicorns/Unicorna all her life. No, I don't know the specifics of how that sociological oddity would work, only that it did.

As to Collard Green, eventually he would of course marry, and his line of descent would eventually marry into the Manehattan Branch of the Apple Clan. Can you guess who is now related to Fluttershy via Hurricane?

Now then, in some fantasy world where this was animated, my first choice of voice actor for Hurricane would be BRIAN BLESSED. So much so that two instances in this short story are taken from actual BRIAN moments. First off, the swearing anecdote comes from some sort of Stephen Fry thing I found on YouTube, seen here, and the turd story is an anecdote he told about one of his climbs up Mt Everest on the news/celebrity quiz show (thing) Have I got News For You. I'd be glad to post a link, but I fear that YouTube has taken down the videos. The story is more or less what I typed... Though I'll happily admit to having... embellished certain elements for the sake of a good story and differentiating enough to avoid blatant plagiarism.

Now, you'll notice that one of the soldiers Hurricane was serving with is named Flash. Now, I originally had a different name, but I forgot it as I was typing so I went with whatever came to mind, thus Flash. Now, some of you who know who BRIAN BLESSED is know he was in the 1980s film adaptation of Flash Gordon, spawning a related meme. Well, after I typed that name, I realized the perfect way that managed to mesh. So, now you came all imagine how Hurricane has another story he loves to tell where he gets to shout "FLASH IS ALIVE!"

And yes, Platinum's Black Room is a real thing, from as far back as the court of Louis XIII and likely beyond. I first learned of it when my dad and I visited the International Spy Museum in Washington, DC back in October. COOL!

And now, a news announcement!

This just in: The identity of Failbaddon the Despoiler's horse uncovered

Because one Epic Failure deserves another, right?

Hurricane, you are MAGNIFICENT! :pinkiecrazy: And Platinum. You magnificent mare I READ YOUR BOOK!!!


I find the people who think that Abstaining is impossible to be quite silly. And Hurricane agrees.

And as I've said before elsewhere: I am certain you read a book, but not THE book.

After all, leaving behind a written record for any random schmuck to find is dangerous in the Court of Unicorns.


This just in: The identity of Failbaddon the Despoiler's horse uncovered

Because one Epic Failure deserves another, right?

yes indeed, although riding it would be difficult considering he has no arms
Also, for some reason I read this and couldn't stop linking Hurricane to Teddy Roosevelt (or at least, the fictionalized version of him) :unsuresweetie:


Well, Hurricane never went to Zebrica to hunt wild beasts after Hearth's Warming, nor was he a commissioner of Manehattan, nor strong-armed one country to give independence to another so that his country could build a canal.

But I will admit they do seem to have the same boisterous personality.

Failbadon got a horse?

Pretty much exactly what it says on the tin. I made a gag chapter for April Fool's 2013. Reactions were better than expected.

:rainbowlaugh: I hate you I laughed so hard. :pinkiehappy:

Steepled hooves (hands) and scary shiny glasses are always a welcome addition to any story I read, heck I've done that myself for my Skype picture!
Oh Platinum, you can plot my doom any day and I'd die with a smile.

Hurricane is great too, and Clover is just soooooo cute. I'd say I wanted to take her home with me but I think The Commander and The "King" would have... problems with that.

Great little addition, even if it doesn't really fit with the whole "Real World Book Entry" idea.

the best part is that it works so well. I can so see Twilight passing out and having that dream.

Very nice poem for that blade. Very One Ring like. I love it.

I was grinning like a maniac when I realized what was being referenced in this chapter.

Here, have a Pinkie and a truckload of Mustaches! :pinkiehappy::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

I imagined Hurricane sounding like a Helghan, but I suppose BRIAN BLESSED is to the Helghan what Genghis Khan is to... Humans in general.


This just in: The identity of Failbaddon the Despoiler's horse uncovered
...Failbaddon the Despoiler...

(Just teasing, of course.)

I like this. It reminds me of how I write when I'm up too late, except my writings are more like the nonsensical ramblings of a six year old rather than a teenager taking artistic liberties with a history report.

"tied to the steak to burn"
should be
"tied to the stake to burn"

Poor Platinum. I think she'd be very relieved surprised to learn that Swirlly is looking down on her actions with grim approval. But she hasn't a way to learn that, and so she must deal with this idealized version of Star-Swirl in her head, one that, she thinks, would have been able to do everything she's done without killing anypony.

Interesting fact: For a sizable amount of time between its discovery and the 20th century, Aluminum, due to its difficulty in refining the ore with the contemporary technology, was considered a precious metal, at times even exceeding gold in value. Therefore, some members of the wealthy actually ate off of aluminum plates to show off their wealth, and the cap stone of the Washington Memorial is in fact a brick of solid aluminum (following the Ancient Egyptian tradition of making the cap stone of the pyramids out of precious metals).

Good to see another chapter. I do have one problem though, ununoctuim/septium are artificial elements that cannot be created without a knowledge of quantum physics and a particle accelerator. Why then are generals named after these as-of-yet undiscovered elements?
Also, I guess wine is thicker than water. (Bu-dum-pish)


....Because the generals are as non-existent as these elements? :ajbemused:

Well that's what he gets

*puts on shades*

for wining.

I have to say, I love the descriptions of political intrigue and politicking going on in here. And I really approve of just how devious and intelligent you made Princess Platinum here; I can't help but picture her as she was portrayed by Rarity in the Hearth's Warming Even episode, so that adds to the awesome.

Also, love the Bible quote as a title for the chapter. You should really consider using it more.


Frankly, it's gotten to where I think I hear Grey DeLisle as Historical!Platinum. ...If you are unaware, she voiced Princess Azula.

You'd think Platinum's cutie mark would be a tipoff for those so eager to discount her in the games of nobility. And yet the puppets dance...

And House Unun does seem to have unusually rapid turnover. Still, when you manufacture somepony wholly artificial, he's bound to have a terribly brief half-life.

Platinum steepled her hooves before her face, the light of the candles reflecting off the lenses of her glasses as she contemplated this.

I think we should all be glad Platinum never bore children, if only so the poor things never had to pilot a giant robot powered by the soul of their dead father. Good thing Clover kept a close eye on the Dead Sea Scrolls...

Pyrite: Fool's Gold. 'Tis a funny pun. I'll admit, the more extremely reactionary and deplorable I made him, the more hilarious he got. It would be awkward, at best, to slip this information into the narrative, so I'll do so here: Dispite his delusions, the 'friends' Pyrite mentioned in reality had no intention on helping his little scheme. Pyrite was basically that one guy nobody actually likes, but they put up with him due to either pity or obligation.

As to the Countess, had he not had his head so far un his own anus he could see his own lunch, he would've noticed what a brilliant wife he had and might have found a willing accomplice. But alas (or not) he came across another of the great blunders (other than getting in a land war in Asia and dealing with a Sicilian when death is on the line): Getting in-between a mother and her children, the most dangerous place in the world.

Musco is short for Muscovite, I dare say my favorite mineral. Named after Muscovy (I assume), the head state that would form Russia, it's a transparent rock that breaks off in flakes, and before glass became cheap enough to use, it was used as window material.

Thunder Strike Legion. It felt apropos for the Junta to have a division of Ninja for the purpose of Pre-Combat maneuvers. Though I'm not sure whether or not they were literally a Legion (1000-5000 guys), or if the name was partially Psychological Warfare. What do you think?

"Voided body fluids." When a person (or animal) dies, all of the muscles in the body relaxes, including the ones at either end of the digestive tract, allowing urine, fecal matter, and presumably sufficiently fluid stomach contents to escape.

As to Musty Tomes... Well, that pony has a low opinion of Platinum and Star-Swirl don't they? Though being neutral through ten volumes and three-thousand and change years must be taxing on the patience. As you look through the Historiography of a certain event or time period (Historiography being "The Study of Historical Interpretation"), you start seeing a pattern. In the years right after the event in question (US Reconstruction, WWI, etc) you see that most papers by contemporary scholars and historians slide to one extreme in tone and temperament, then about twenty or so years later the papers slam into the opposite extreme, and another twenty-plus years after that things begin to slide into the middle, after which things manage to wobble into an equilibrium at or near a detached neutrality.

Assumedly not even Hearth's Warming and the Founders would be immune. Clearly in the Late 4th and Early 5th centuries Post-Warming it was Platinum and maybe even Star-Swirl's turn at being the source of everypony's throbbing hate-boner in the Scholarly Community (though in the latter's case, it was less hate and more of a 'Sure he did a lot of good, but look at what an asshole he was!', citing only one or two events <that may not have even happened> over and over again and nothing else), and most assuredly the rest of the Founders had their Hate Periods as well. ...One wonders at how Historians and Scholars during Hurricane's hate period painted him as.

A well written history. Though it would be lovely to see some new chapters in the main history.

Oh, that's remarkably easy, of course. He already is known for sexual excesses, so you'd simply point out all of those. Simplify the character, or make him simplified. A stallion who rose through the ranks on his backs, maybe hint at him (despite evidence to the contrary) betraying everyone he knew on the way up. That's already a solid (or at least, based on the tone and style of the historiography present here, in the time period listed) 'trope' in human histories, of the scheming and licentious Queen.

I say 'based on the tone and style' because clearly that is 'Great Man' style history, which imagines that to tell the history of a nation, one only has to tell the history of the right people. History as a series of Kings and Princes and betrayals, taking the nobility's pretensions of being the center-of-the-world seriously. A very common style, really, but not that of the modern Historian. Which doesn't necessarily make them more right, always, but it does mean that, when they are wrong, they are often wrong in very different ways.

Another way they could take it, is play up his militarism and aggression. In that day and age, when war and violence were, at least for a time, not something most anypony experienced, someone from a more warlike age gets treated odd. Some historians would be very fascinated by war, having never seen it, while others would be repelled, and would paint him as this vicious 'General Ripper' sort of character.

Third, they could not blame him for anything, but take him to be unimportant. Always at the beck and call of one mare or another, not particularly smart or clever (they'd *also* use the sex anecdotes, but for a different purpose) and ultimately unimportant compared to the others. Puddinghead would get the same treatment, of course...as, at different times, Pansy, Platinum and maybe even Clover (especially among those Historians who decide to value Platinum well (and the opposite thing, Love Periods, in which a figure is the source of everything good in an era, are quite common too)).

Finally, there would be those who would take him to task, those who valued Pansy's contributions, especially to the new ethos of the Pegasus. To them, he'd be the last of the old, some tyrant father to write Fairy-tales about, against the new world represented by her and her husband. I could entirely see, and whatever point movies are made, someone coming out with an animated movie of Pansy as the Tyrant's Daughter, or the like, falling in love with the humble and honest Earth Pony Stallion. Star-crossed love and all of that.

Anyways, there are probably other additional answers. Sorry for babbling on like this.

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