Just a guy looking into writing fanfics
Rainbow Dash isn't what many ponies would consider attractive, but, somehow, she's managed to score a date with a stallion. Now she's at the restaurant, waiting for him to show up.
Thanks to PopMediaVagabond and CleanSweep for giving feedback on this.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Unfortunately for Rainbow-chan, her date was the "I Wanna Dakimakura for Christmas" guy... and he got arrested.
... Or maybe she's really lucky, all things considered...
And then the demon, Discord slunk into her room, "I can make you pretty, Dashie... you just have to make a wish..." He held out a Monkey's Paw sticking out of an old lamp!
I feel so bad for Rainbow that I just wanna give her a big comforting hug and tell that she's the most beautiful and attractive mare in my eyes.
I also wanna track down the no good jerk who stood her up and knock him out for doing that to Rainbow Dash.
this is why hooking up with applejack is best choice, a apple a day keep rainbow depression away
Aww, it's so sad, poor Dash
Really well-written story.
The pacing was good and the tone was consistent, it was a nice believable somber read. Thank you for writing it
Right in the feels.
Sad Dash makes me sad
I hope her friends can go and comfort her
I never really considered Rainbow Dash an ugly character, but I think you hammered it in pretty well, and it is understandable; if not really emphasized much in the actual show.
Poor Rainbow Dash. I wanna hug her so bad.
Even though this story made me cry, this was beautiful and very well written. Thanks for the good read.
I usually avoid these heavyhearted stories, but it was good. Well done. +1
Poor Dashie!!! She needs a big hug right now!!!
Someone give RD some boops and cuddles this instant or I shall declare war, my weapons shall be pillows and other soft objects alongside hot chocolate.
little does she know, the stallion was killed on the way to the restaurant
Well that was depressing.
11468317
Perform your duty. Snuggle a pony today.
Also, poor Dashie.
She is too beautiful.
nitpick here, but her eyes are not magenta!! they are closer to a cerise.
magenta:
about.canva.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/8/2019/03/magenta.png
cerise:
htmlcolorcodes.com/assets/images/colors/cerise-color-solid-background-1920x1080.png
RD'S eyes:
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/1617f570-4cf2-49be-b42d-924c4936628a/dabi8y6-f9516850-c4da-45e5-8805-0953271339e5.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzE2MTdmNTcwLTRjZjItNDliZS1iNDJkLTkyNGM0OTM2NjI4YVwvZGFiaTh5Ni1mOTUxNjg1MC1jNGRhLTQ1ZTUtODgwNS0wOTUzMjcxMzM5ZTUucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.VAg8q52_EXwj3hGbu1ePdhcorDcwQkh-mf76HxfWgFI
Well...that's a roundhouse kick to the feels and not in the good way.
A great fic, sad, but great, poor Dash, I just want to give her a hug.
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I have been performing this duty since the dawn of time, I shall soldier on. Never shall there be a pony who could cry out 'cuddles pls' and receive none so long as I inhabit this realm.
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A true patriot.
And then Cozy Glow walks up to you...
"Can I have cuddles please?"
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everyone shall have cuddles, did I stutter?
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A man after my own heart.
Incidentally Cozy Glow accepts your snuggles, and endorsement of her as the next Empress of Equestria!
Yay! I'm popular!
I know those feels. The dating scene can be painful.
Has happened to me before.
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X2
11468317
I will admit I haven't read the story, but based on the comments and the title alone, I want to give Rainbow cuddles too. She's too beautiful to be treated this way
Excuse me, ladies and gents, but I have a stallion to beat violently with whatever's handy at the moment.
11469317
Read it, its sad but also a short good read too, and when you finish, give RD a boop, a cup of coco, an a large warm blanket
Don't worry, Rainbow. One day.
That cover art, dayuuum. That is one sad RD. I don't know how to critique this to be honest. It's not a very satisfying story, but clearly it's not meant to be. Stories like this always give me the feeling, "what was the point of al that?". I'm a happy end kind of guy, so I see a build up to some sort of conclusion where RD gets comforted by (one of) her friends, or she finds out there was a valid reason the stallion didn't show up, or she ends up with a different stallion who turns out to be a great coltfriend. Clearly I am seeing things that are not there, there is no such build up. But because I expect it I get that "what was the point of that?" feeling when it doesn't happen.
I can't really say much about what is there. I didn't see any typo's or structural problems (but I'm no editor, so take that for what it's worth). It's perfectly fine.
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I think we can all agree that this needs a sequel
11467566
is he like Chris chans final form?
*cut to a human sneaking in*
Hey dash, you okay?
Dash:crying herself to sleep.
Hey, hey dash shhh, it’s okay your not ugly or unattractive. Your very beautiful and unique.
Plus screw them dash if they can’t see what you really are or find you beautiful and cute. Then well, fuck’em.
They don’t know what true beauty is if it even hit them in the face. Because dash… well theres also a soft side of you, that many don’t see from you, and when your hurting you try to be strong to don’t show weakness. But even we, humans have done some bad things in life as a species, but we still see beauty where others do not.
So dash your not ugly or unattractive you are in fact, beautiful and cute. And if people turn don’t like to lose, becuase your a girl/mare then oh boy. Since dash you can do things they can not even dream of doing. I mean your an element of Harmony for god sake, you stay loyal to your friends even when the odds are stacked against you. You still remain by your friends sides. And you can do a sonic rainboom, if stallions or at least male ponies don’t see that in you then well maybe it time to move on. Or give it a chance with others species who aren’t poines.
So dash, your not ugly or unattractive, your in fact beautiful in your own way. We love you dash, so please dash get some sleep, for you have to tell your friends what happen. Or whenever your ready to do so.
*hugs rainbow dash and gives her a kiss on the head and cheek*
Goodbye rainbow dash.
Hopefully in the sequel, some pony or someone gives you what you deserve.
Now then, time to find that son of bitch that bailed on you.
*racks shotgun*
It’s hunting season
11469627
Let me join
This... hits strangely close to me.
I've never had a girlfriend. In fact, for a long time now, I've never had what Dash and I secretly want. Someone to cuddle up with after a long day.
This desire of mine constantly tries to screw me over in the OC of mine that is, as much as I may get yelled at, a direct reflection of myself and who I want to be in fifty years. My OC, Timken Bearing, is supposed to be this older stallion who doesn't care about romanticism because that's what I want to be in fifty years.
Yet, because of the way I am now, I keep wanting to write that secret desire he has. The desire to truly be loved. I really DO NOT want to do that, but I do at the same time. A back-and-forth Flip-O-Rama. It's what hinders a lot of people when making OC's, especially those who want their OC to be a reflection of them.
In fact, what SUCKS about self-inserts is that you can tell what the author is like from them. You can tell what their whole life is like, even. You can see what they wish their lives were like instead what their current lives are. THAT is what really sucks to me. The fact that so many authors on here, especially newer ones like myself, just want better lives. It puts me in a bad mood when reading self-insert stories, including my own. It just sucks all around.
Sorry for the little rant, if you can call it that. I just really wanted to get my thoughts out. As for the story, all I can say is that It's a good, bittersweet read that is grounded in reality. No Deus Exes, no savior of hope in the form of a friend or loved one. Just a story about what happens in the real world.
And that's what we need. The stories that pull us back into reality. Like anything else, It's unhealthy to take in too much of one thing; this case being living in other worlds for too long. The reason we do this, of course, is to forget about our world's many, many, MANY problems. But It's up to us to regulate our time in other worlds and to focus on our own to at least fix a few problems here and there.
I'm gonna stop there before I keep rambling on. Thank you for this well-written story set in reality. I hope to read more from you. I also hope to see more artwork from whoever made that cover. I like it.
Such a beautiful story of Dash filled with self loathing and demonizing stallions. Just keeping us here in this moment rather than providing answers to questions makes more interpretations valid. So many ways to take this I wonder what the author intended?
After how Dash has been treating Zephyr I can’t say I have much sympathy for her here. Not that Zephyr is sympathetic himself mind you.
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Have you meant zephyr. I think dash deserves better than him.
I'm not sure what's changed but it used to be rare to get stood up for a date. Sometimes you grinned and dealt with it but it was easy enough in the end to just say 'this wasn't a good time.' Ghosting wasn't a real thing.
11469622 I dunno, the animation shows him as really really skinny.
Ayy, glad to see it finally posted and doing well!
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he reached a level of chan so all encompassing and vast he collapsed in upon himself like a neutron star
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"Have I meant Zephyr"? Why yes, yes I did (we even spelled his name the same way).
You did actually read my post, right?
"I think dash deserves better than him."
Ok... Sure. Yes. I have no argument there; I never even discussed it. What I did discuss (or rather imply), and what you seem to be replying to, was Dash was unsympathetic for treating him (Zephyr) like trash* and yet expecting a 'stallion' to be better. She might deserve better and I think I would argue that she might have received it. Between her past history with stallions and her inner thoughts here I am thinking that unnamed stallion really dodged a bullet.
*She treats him even worse when she flirts (rather badly) with him in season 9. Just using him, and his attraction to her, for her own ends.
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encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSmCCC71r79lfiY3WHPvf_vOmQsuZdB4536dA&usqp=CAU
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I actually have a decent life, I just want an adventure. I've kinda seen what earth mostly has to offer and want something new. I wish I could see Equestria.
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RD needs her mane out a little longer but she's got a fit butt.
Ponies, like us have bad days. Those days don’t always have happy endings. Thanks for a short, emotional piece, which many will relate with.
...is this rated Teen just because of the word "bastards"?
One thing RD can do is stop putting herself on a pedestal all the time. Dudes don't wanna date a competitor, and RD is the Equestrian Equivalent of "strong independent woman". If she'd be a little bit nicer and show more interest in the stallion, she'd probably have better luck.
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Hear hear good sir!
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Speak for your fucking self.
I personally love when a woman stands up for herself, especially to me.
I'm very domineering and thickheaded so if a woman doesn't tell me off or tell me what she wants, I never fucking realize I've done wrong half the time.
Also, I love women who have confidence in their abilities and themself, especially when they can back it up. and RD can back it up