INSURANCE! a Grumpy Goat >tail<

by De Writer

Chapter 12

Saying, “Adieu, my friend, I still have time to make the Registry and the Trust and Loan with these papers,” I set out down the trail to Ponyville to add a bit more to my reputation as “that evil goat that lives up on the mountain.”

It remains a delightful trip through town, lots of shade trees and a lovely clatter of hooves on the cobbled streets. I came to the square before the town hall without incident.

I spread out my nice new β1000gold contracts on Mol’s shiny counter. I had two that I put to one side. I chirped, “Work for you, my lovely young mare!”

As she started to assess them, I saw the disappointment settle on her face.

I decided that was not acceptable so I told her, “No, Mol my sweet, I am not in any way working against what the Princesses’ Truth Testing Spell has done. These two over here each have a copy of the boiler plate with amount and the result page. Attached to each one is a list of the names and signatures for their purchase of my contract. One of these is for Luna and the other is for Celestia.”

As she assessed the whole Gold bit fee, she glanced at me sideways and replied, “You are not? This sure looks like it, my handsome young goat. For giving me a near heart attack, you owe me dinner. Besides, I want to see you weasel off when their Highnesses land on you!”

“Done, My Sweet! Close up and come with me. I have a side trip to the Trust and Loan.”

Mol called in a town courier and gave her the copies for Celestia and Luna with the admonition, “These are for their Highnesses eyes only, Strawberry! Tell the guards that it is from the registry and will affect the audit. Do not let the guards deliver it.”

As Strawberry cantered off on her errand, Mol locked up. We went to the Trust and Loan.

As we strolled up, Mister Greenbriar met us at the door! “Grumpy! Just the goat that I was hoping to see. Mol, what a surprise. Do you have business for us?”

Mol smiled back, “Nope. My business is dinner with this dead goat, here.”

Greenbriar called, “Swerten! Tea and sweet biscuits for Mol, here. Come, Grumpy. Our business requires my office.”

We retired to Mister Greenbriar’s somewhat spartan office.

He laid out some files on his desk and picked up the first of them. “These all relate to the recent riot. This one is an awkward one. Mister Grade had a good business after a rocky start up. Rent is nearly due. The landlord’s manager is Sir Snobbin Realty. He is about to be evicted because Mister Grade was robbed of his whole week’s sales at knife point during the riot.”

“I see. What does Grade need to really make a go of it?”

“Besides replacing the lost money, about four thousand bits for expanding their stock line.”

“OK, this one will have three parts. A Wholeheart grant paid to Sir Snobbin, to pay the full balance on the lease. Negotiate a fresh lease and pay it in full too. A Wholeheart grant to Mister Grade to replace his stock and add the four thousand that he needs. Last, a Wholeheart grant ongoing of a hundred bits a month to the retired couple who own the land.”

Mister Greenbriar nodded happily as he made notes. “I had not thought of helping out the old couple. That is well done.”

“Thank you, Mister Greenbriar. Are the others pretty much the same? Windows and looting? Lost business and living expenses?”

“They are.”

“Good. Show me where to sign and let’s get this done.”

I was briefly busy with Wholeheart signatures.

“Now, about the business that brought me here. Please deposit these Secure Gold Transfers. I got β5000 Gold today.”

As he took the papers, he remarked jovially, “If you keep on like this, we may need to build a new vault!”

I paused and replied, “Speaking as Chairman of the Board and 51% stock holder, that is a remarkably good idea! Go ahead and get plans drawn up. We should be able to have work started in a week or so!”

We could see through the door’s window that a pony had joined Mol in the waiting area. As he opened the door, Mister Greenbriar smiled, “That is good to hear, Grumpeter! We can certainly use the new vault!” Looking up, he added, “Mister Grade! I am glad that you made it! I have good news for you!”

As Mol and I strolled up the street, she asked incredulously, “A new vault!? Is that why you stopped here?”

I nodded amiably as we ambled up the street. “I have been creating a BIT of a problem for them. I still have another train coming with even more gold. Only seemed fair to help them with storage space.”

We got our seats in the outdoor dining area of Caramel’s and had just started to order from Windy while Peanut looked on in approval when the storm broke!

Celestia and Luna bore down on our table, trailing an excited Romaine! Celestia slapped down the almost incriminating document and gave me a sideways glare. “You told Mister Lots that you would not undo the glamor that our truth testing spell did to him! Yet, here he is, fourth signature down, going to have his visage return to its pre interview state! The others were all massively disfigured by the truth testing spell as well but they are all going to return to their pre interview looks? How are you not interfering with the spell and our investigation?”

I looked up innocently and asked, “Were you done with that lot? When you terminate Canterlot Casualty and Life and restructure Equestrian National Bank, would those lying executives try interfering for their own profit?”

Celestia grudgingly nodded, “Both of those points are true. Now how are you doing it and not breaking our truth testing spell?”

I shrugged, “I am using your truth testing spell itself. What are the conditions under which it will dispel the glamor?”

Luna was thoughtfully tapping on the table as she recalled, “When they make the full truth of the answers to our questions known to us. When our Royal Kingdom and Principality law is done with them. Or should they die from any cause, the glamor will dissipate.”

As she said it, Celestia got it too! “Sometime within forty eight hours after they return home! Why didn’t they know that they were spending so much gold to die conveniently far from us and the audits?”

I gave another sideways shrug as I pointed out, “It was right there in a PUBLICLY REGISTERED contract, free to read just for the asking. Is it my fault if they didn’t bother to read? I mean, all that I did was not mention that their contract was directly connected to yours. I didn’t like any of them in any case.”

Luna, brightened much by the news, demanded, “Cancel Grumpy’s order, Windy! He is getting whatever he wants to drink but he is getting the Thistle Bloom and clover top steak with snow star sauce and sea grass puffs on the side. For desert, he is getting the Far Northern Dales fried oatmeal treat with his choice of ice cream to top it.

“Such noble service to his sovereigns is deserving of a great reward!”

Mol instantly chipped in, “That sounds great! Make it two! Grumpy is paying for mine!”

Off to one side, Celestia was gently telling Romaine, “Right, dear, it is a great story but you can’t publish it until three days from now. If you examine the document, you will see why. Now sit with us and get yourself some dinner.”