• Published 20th Sep 2012
  • 4,920 Views, 134 Comments

Time is of the Matter - munomana



What happens when a guy gets to control time? Trickery.

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First Encounters

Time is of the matter

First Encounters

As Twilight and the girls stepped into the opening, the music filled the ears of everyone around as it cascaded the surrounding area at full potential. The most unusual part was the vocals. The vocals were in the same language that they all shared. The most confusing part was the fact that the type of music was very alien to the ponies.

'Why in the world would ANYPONY make music out-' Thought Twilight before her eyes fell the location of the music.

Where the music came from, a strange creature lay against a tree, sleeping. It was similar to an ape although very different. It had thin fur on it's lower limbs, but was rather bald when it came to it's upper 'forelegs?'. It had a short, brown mane on it's had that curved up towards the front of thee head. The weirdest part was the fact that it wore CLOTHES. It wore a 2 piece set on it's body consisting of a white cloth on it's upper body and a split brown one that split below it's waste. It had smooth claws on it's forelegs and some sort of footwear on the ends of it's lower legs. It appeared to be bipedal do to it's posture.

The creature lay next to what emitted the music. A small black box of some sort lay, somehow creating the sound.

Twilight turned to her friends before starting to whisper.

"Girls, we need to be quiet. I don't want to wake-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"


"-AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I was awoken by the sound of a female screaming. no. SCREECHING.

'Finally, I'm awake.' I thought before slowly opening my eyes, welcoming the sun. It felt like I was leaning against a rugged tree. Below me was some unbelievably soft grass.

'I probably passed out. They could have at least brought me to the-' Was all I thought before my eyes adjusted to the sunshine, revealing where I was. What I saw, completely blew my mind.

Before me stood six pastel colored ponies, or that's what my mind registered them as first. They were all uniquely colored. The one in the front was purple and the ones behind were colored: yellow, orange, cyan, pink, and white. They were about 3 1/2 ft tall.

The purple pony had a look of shock, attempting to cover her ears with her fore-hooves before collapsing due to lack of balance. The WHITE one had a look of terror with 'her?' mouth open.

'Oh I am freaking insane.'

Registering that I was clearly out of my mind, I stood up, and started to walk up to the purple one in front. It didn't move, frozen in place. I slowly got down to my knee before talking.

"Okay, imaginary pony. I know you're fake so I'm just gonna poke you in the nose so you go away."

This, made it's jaw LITERALLY hit the floor.

I pulled my arm up before poking her little snout, emitting a little "HONK" as it it was a clowns nose. I stopped.

'I shouldn't have felt anything.' I slowly did it again to confirm my insanity.

'I'm gonna go bang my head against that tree.' I mused ti myself as I turned around and began to walk to my original napping spot.

"Come back here!" yelled one in a tomboyish voice. Before I could turn around to look, a bright flash of rainbow smashed into my as we went rolling around the ground before abruptly stopping at the foot of a tree. I quickly turned and forced her on top of me before using my legs to propel the pony away.

The pony quickly readied for another attack. But before she could pounce, she was enveloped in a purple aura. On top of the purple pony's head emitted a purple light akin to the one surrounding the cyan pony. 'Unicorns and magic? What is this, a girls cartoon?'

I was about to question before a thought struck my head. 'Wait, why did I feel that and why did they talk?'

I did the first thing that came to mind. "Where am I?" I asked in a confused voice.

Before the purple pony could speak up, the pink pony jumped out from behind and ran directly in front of me, nearly inches away, staring with her freakishly HUGE eyes.

"Hi my name is Pinkie Pie and I like parties do you like parties? Do you have parties? We should TOTALLY have a party for you mister clothing monkey! Do you like cupcakes? I LOVE cupcakes! What's your name?" She blurted out with unbelievable speed impossible for any living being to do, regardless of the alien factor. I didn't understand a word it said 'I'm still not sure if I'm insane. This is too real to be a dream.'

As an idea popped into my head I began to talk. "Can you repeat that?"

She nodded like a madman before taking a huge gasp of air. I took that as my cue and began to slow down the world around me to about half speed.

This time, All of the words were easily describable although much deeper.

I then decided to answer her to the best of my ability from memory.

"Nice to meet you Pinkie Pie, my name's Roberto. I like parties a lot and have some parties where I'm from. I really appreciate the offer, but I'm still a little hazy in the head as for if this is real or not. I'm a human, not a clothed monkey. I also like cupcakes."

I put on the cheekiest smile I could bear as the mouths of the rest of the ponies proceeded to drop in shock.

Then, just like for the cyan pony who was still a little reluctant to trust, the aura lifted Pinkie Pie back. Then, the purple pony stepped forward, eager to ask questions.

"U-um hello... Roberto," Said the pony ask reluctantly as ever thought possible. "My name is Twilight Sparkle."

Thinking this was fake, I answered as enthusiastically as possible trying to answer invisible questions that they were likely to ask.

"Nice to meet you Twilight Sparkle, and before you ask, I am not going to eat you guys," With that, everyone of the ponies seemed to ease up a little... save for the yellow pony who was still shaking in the back. poor girl must be frightened. "but I need to know. Where am I?"

With that, the orange pony in the back pushed her way through the others before answering. "How can Y'all not know where ya are! You're in th' Everfree Forest, th' most dangerous place in Equestia!"

"Equestria? That Discord guy was right." I whispered to myself, not wanting to explain myself any longer.

Twilight slowly walked back up. "These are my friends, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, and of course, Pinkie Pie which you somehow found out yourself in Pinkie's rambling.

Before I could speak up, my stomach growled, indicating that I was apparently hungry after ALL OF THIS ADVENTURING.

"Umm... is there a town nearby? I have a lot to think about and I'm starving."

"Ponyville is right outside of the forest. That's where we all live." Answered Twilight.

"Alright, let's go... but first."

I slowly ducked myself to eye level with the ponies before walking slowly towards the back towards the yellow pony who proceeded to hide behind her mane in fear. "It's okay... I promise I won't hurt you." I said as I slowly stroked her mane, allowing her to ease up a little. 'She's just too adorable to let her be like that, real or not.'

I slowly stood up before walking towards the tree, picking up my phone, stopping the music, and walking towards the direction where the ponies came from. "I know you have many questions. but I'll answer them in the Ponyville."

"Wait, I have a question," asked Twilight. "Did you happen to see a bright light come from that direction about an hour ago?"

She then proceeded to point in the direction where I came from.

"I woke up in this land about an hour ago in that direction. I'll give you more details IN PONYVILLE." I groaned. "Sorry, but I'm starving and tired. I'll gladly answer anything you need to know when we get there."

With that, We set off towards Ponyville.


The sun still shone upon the six ponies and human as they traveled through the treacherous forest that separated them from Ponyville, their destination. The path they traveled was adorned by bright and beautiful plant-life that seemed too extravagant to even exist... as if it was from a coloring book.

Twilight and the five other ponies stood a good ten feet in front of the strange creature, guiding the way through. All was tense, Twilight was completely unsure of the origin of the human. She had no clue whether to trust him or not, but what was on her mind was something else. Twilight needed to know all about him. His presence in Equestria was unheard of, puzzling her as she mulled on about the subject before a certain tomboyish pegasus spoke up in a hushed whisper.

"I don't trust this punk one bit. He'd probably just want us to show us where we live so he could eat us!"

"Rainbow, let's not get too hasty. He may just be lost. What makes you think that we could just jump to conclusions!" replied Twilight, mirroring the tone of Rainbow Dash.

"I'm just saying that I don't trust him. He was in the Everfree forest and you know he's probably what made that huge, yet epic, light," Rainbow huffed.

"He may not be here on bad intentions. I need to know more about him." replied Twilight.

"Well if he tries anything funny, I'll-" spoke Rainbow Dash before being interrupted by the orange farm pony.

"Ah reckon he's here by accident. Ah could see it in his eyes, he's not a bad critter."

"Well I'll take anything I can get from him since he speaks equestrian... Say, why does he know equestrian?" Said Twilight, attempting to steer the chat away.

Before any of the ponies could open their mouths, a familiar voice emanated from behind.

"You know I can hear you back here," replied Roberto as he quickened his pace, catching up to the ponies ahead of him. "Look, I know that you don't have any reason to trust me, but getting to know a few things about me might help. Ask away."

With that Pinkie Pie darted forward towards the human, preparing to bombard him with a shit-storm of questions completely irrelevant to the subject, but not before the purple hue pulled her back as Twilight sped up her trot towards the front of the small group.

"AHEM. I have a few questions to ask you right now." Exclaimed Twilight as she prepared to interrogate him.

'Now I'm doing some Q&A with purple unicorn. I'm not sure what's anything anymore... might as well go along with it, set my mind straight.'

"What are you exactly?" asked Twilight as she trotted along side Roberto.

"Well my species name is human, but in terms of Binomial Nomenclature, we are called Homo sapiens." replied Roberto.

"Homo what? And what is Binomial Nomenclature?"

"I'm not a science teacher so I'll save that for another time because I really don't want to explain it now. As for Homo sapiens, it's Latin for "wise man" if I remember correctly," Roberto replied in a knowledgeable tone.

"Okay... well one thing confuses me. Why do you know Equestrian?" asked Twilight.

"What's Equestrian?"

"It's the language you're speaking!" exclaimed the purple mare.

"This is English my dear Twilight," Roberto answered.

"You know what, I'll find out later. Now, what brings you to the Everfree forest?"

"This is what this forest's called, huh. Well I have no idea. I just saw a flash and I appeared here," replied the human.

"That sure is puzzling... I'll have to study that when we arrive," said Twilight as she mulled over some facts. "Wait, are you saying you've never heard of the Everfree forest?"

"Nope, never, nor have I heard of 'Equestria.'"

"UGH! This is TOO confusing right now! How could you not heard of Equestria?" exclaimed Twilight.

"Does that mean you're an ALIEN!?" exclaimed Pinkie as she hopped up ahead of us, obviously intrigued by the circumstances.

"Pinkie, that can't be true. He said he saw a flash and awoke here. Y'know that Equestia's only a country. He could be from anywhere in Equus!" explained Twilight as she attempted to calm the bouncing mare.

With that I pulled myself back into the conversation.

"Actually, I've never heard of Equus. I'm from Earth. USA to be more exact," I explained as I continued to question my sanity.

Twilight then stopped in her tracks and turned towards me, revealing the twinkle in her eye.

"Does that really mean you're an alien? Do you have advanced technology? Do you have magic? Do you-" She was quickly interrupted when a cyan hoof stuffed her mouth.

"Twilight, I think he's had enough trying to deal with Pinkie going hay-wire on him, don't ya think?" replied Rainbow Dash.

Twilight then proceeded to adorn a light blush across her face, embarrassed.

"Sorry, this is just all new to me! I've never gotten to study an alien let alone one that speaks Equestrian!"

"English."

"Sorry, 'English'" apologized Twilight.

"OK, well Twilight's had enough questions for now. Anyone wanna take a try?" Roberto asked

With that, Rainbow Dash flew ahead of me and hovered ahead, flying backwards, glaring into my eyes a foot away. "How do I know that I can even trust you? What if you just want us to take you to our town so you can EAT us?" interrogated Rainbow Dash.

"Well, I'd probably have already eaten you if I actually ate ponies. Besides, I'd much rather eat a cupcake. Ponies probably taste terrible," assured the human.

Rainbow Dash seemed to accept the human a little bit more with that, but that wasn't all that was on her mind.

"Well are you awesome?" asked Rainbow Dash as the mares mentally face-hoofed.

"I think I'm preeeeeeeeetty awesome myself," He replied, putting on smirk as he looked directly into the mare's eyes.

"Oh yeah? Prove it!" exclaimed Rainbow, waiting to be amused by his attempt then to do something radical to look cooler than him.

"Not here. Once we get into town, I'll hang with you for a bit," replied Roberto.

Before Rainbow Dash could pout any further, Pinkie Pie jumped ahead, readying to kill me with questions.

Pinkie then proceeded to inhale tons of air, implying that she had a lot to ask... in a short amount of time, but before she could, an aura surrounded her and pulled her back, revealing a white mare with an identical aura surrounding her horn.

"Pinkie darling, I think you've already asked him enough questions for now. I shall ask him a few questions myself, if you please," explained Rarity as she gathered her thoughts.

Rarity then proceeded to trot ahead Roberto and stop. Before he could say anything, Rarity turned around and examined his clothes, "These clothes will not do."

"Umm, what do you mean?" asked Roberto.

"These clothes are a monstrosity. No creature should try to look fabulous with those clothes, might as well not any clothes at all!" exclaimed Rarity as she shook her head disapprovingly.

"Rarity, humans wearing clothes is necessary where I'm from. Not wearing clothes is pretty much a taboo and in most places, can be arrested for being nude in public," I explained as I looked back towards my clothes, "besides, these clothes are rather comfy and popular among teens my age."

"Are all clothes like this where you're from?" asked Rarity, hoping to learn more about extraterrestrial fashion.

"No, these are just every day clothes that are comfy and look rather nice. Some people wear fabulous suits and dresses that cost a fortune! Sadly for me, I'm rather poor," He look down dejectedly. 'I always thought I'd look nice in a suit' he thought to himself. After that, Rarity walked back into the group of mares before we continued to walk down the path, passing by the same lush trees from before... it was getting rather tedious.

As we continued to walk, Twilight explained to me the origin of the Everfree forest and Equestria's rulers along with the story of Nightmare moon before a light glimmered in the distance.

"We're almost there," said Twilight.

"Thank goodness, I was getting-" I was cut off as we passed through the clearing, revealing me to the beautiful land of Equestria.