This story is a sequel to Secondhand Laughter
Maud Pie has never dealt with change well, not that life ever seemed to take her comfort into consideration. With the ending of the school year on the horizon and her doctorate close at hand, there are many changes coming Maud's way—changes she is in no way ready for. And so, on this last winter break, she decides to head back home.
Home means consistency. It means stability. It is predictable.
But few things are set in stone and Maud is finding that family may not be one of them.
A story set in the Who We Become series.
Proofreading/Editing by Krickis.
Chapters (5)
I'm really happy you wrote a new story for this continuity! Good to see you again. I have so far loved your style and story tones so I'm looking forward to seeing the rest of this story. What a lucky weekend.
Comparing a family to a house and inspecting the "foundation" isn't exactly a "groundbreaking" metaphor, but it works very well for Maud's mindset. I love your chapter titles and the way you do a photo for your cover art is always so charming. This story, so far, wears its theme and intentions on its sleeve and I love it.
I think I've admitted in a previous story that I'm a huge Trixie fan (for some reason) and I wish there were more Pinkie stories out there written by people who can see more of the complexities that I believe can exist in her character. Since this was a Maud focused story, I was a bit disappointed at first. However I find myself compelled by her your portrayal of Maud. This poor little wreck, just like the rest of your cast, lol.
I like your idea of giving her anxiety and this... Savior complex is interesting. I think it is very interesting how she has categorized her family, putting each of her siblings in these roles that none of them probably ended up filling as expected. In some ways I think she has infantalized Marble while possibly expecting too much from Lime and herself. That isn't even getting into Pinkie's issues or how little she seems to expect from her parents. Then again, my read could be wrong! The story isn't finished yet.
I'm absolutely stoked to hear what is going on with Trixie and Pinkie... And I really hope that the brighter ending Secondhand Laughter ended on its carried through. That they are taking care of each other and are moving in a healthier direction. It at least sounds like Trixie is doing shows again, which is great. I'm also curious to see how Caramel fits into this whole picture. I don't have any emotional attachment to his character yet, but it already sounds messy. However, messy is great for some interesting drama!
I also wanted to say I liked the scene where Maud thinks through her thoughts on Gilda. The pains you went through to show that Maud was knowledgeable, thoughtful, careful and empathetic were noticed. She didn't feel eager to come to any particular conclusion, she just wanted to do right by her family. I don't know why, but it was probably one of my highlights for the story so far... The other highlight was probably Marble and Maud's private conversation.
Things are a-brewing in this story and I'm dying to read the rest. Sounds like another talk with Pinkie is on the horizon. Lots of miracle working for Maud to do in three more chapters... But best of luck to her!
Thanks so much for writing another story. It really is a highlight of my weekend. Good luck and happy trails. See you on the other side!
11274922
You have no idea how much this comment means to me!
I’m so glad you’re along for the ride
I heard from Krickis that the Marble scene was a standout moment from the story, but it’s interesting that you pointed out Maud’s deliberation. What’s interesting about those two moments is that I spent a lot of time working on the latter, whereas the scene in Marble’s room just seemed to flow. Originally it was just a small throwaway scene but it just went.
I’m really happy with how it came out.
And don’t worry, there’s plenty of Trixie and Pinkie in this story. Speaking of which… chapter 3 is out
As always, thank you for your time!
Haha, I'm glad you love writing these characters because I love reading about them. And if the opening scene was really the reason that the story was written, then that's a worthy scene to be sure!
Trixie is out in full force here. Absolutely charming the pants (or I suppose skirt) off of Maud. Well... Maybe not literally. Not YET anyway, if I'm reading things between them correctly. Maud seems a bit smitten, though I wonder if that can carry forward. Obviously, despite Pinkie and Trixie not OFFICIALLY dating, their relationship is...complicated. I like seeing Trixie’s perspective on it (that Pinkie is just some kind of compulsive people mechanic) and seems almost dismissive of her own part in the relationship. It does make me wonder what Pinkie's perspective is, though. Regardless, even without that complexity, Trixie in your continuity is usually more... Abrasive. Rougher. Maud probably got pretty far on Pinkie's request to Trixie (and also on being pretty cute, which seems to ALSO have been a bit of a setup by Pinkie), so I wonder how things would go further in the future. When Maud inevitably meets Trixie at a low point.
So, in any case, I think you did a great job of showing some great interactions between Trixie and Pinkie (adorable, I need more of these two being best friends/lovers/trauma partners) and Trixie and Maud. I couldn't have asked for a chapter that better fit exactly what I hoped to see or if this story. Still, with two chapters left, my wishlist now includes some Maud and Pinkie interaction, I'm dying to see what happens with Lime, and while Caramel came out of nowhere to me I'd be happy to see how he properly fits into everything someday.
I also just wanted to say that I'm really happy with Trixie’s tarot reading. I don't know if that was a cold reading, some wisdom she pulled out her butt or a practiced speech but it all felt very cathartic to me because everything she said was something I wished I could tell Maud last chapter.
So kudos! Thank you for the chapter and your continued work on this series!
11275346
Of course I'll let Prep handle her own comments, but I wanted to chime in here to say this:
...has gears turning in my head. I'm still in the extremely early stages of figuring it out, but I'll be the next to write these two in this universe after this story (unless Prep comes up with another idea before then or wants to take over the story we were talking about together, which she is welcome to do). But yeah, just wanted to say that I'm also actively checking these comments and that your interest has me going all
in continuing with these characters!
...and to say that Caramel coming out of nowhere is my doing lmao this isn't the time or place to address my reasoning behind that, but I hope when you see him next you'll agree with his role in things and if not then blame me for shoving my OC into things
11275710
I've really enjoyed how Prep has written these characters so far, but I'm always craving more. I'm glad to hear that there is more planned and I'm interested to see how you'll carry their stories forward (assuming, as you said, that Prep decides take step back as their writer for a bit).
I know there is a wider continuity that you've written that these characters exist in. I haven't read any of that extended universe yet, but I've browsed the stories. I'm somewhat familiar with the broad strokes of the story, and always figured that Caramel fit in (in part) because it seems like the wider story focuses a lot on the complexities of love and how messy it can be to tie down. Rereading some of Prep's previous stories, I even remembered that Caramel is brought up a few times in Pinkie's internal dialogs, so he definitely isn't coming from nowhere, lol. I just didn't remember and this is his first speaking role.
In any case, I'm curious to see where you or Prep take it from here. Now I gotta go read the last couple chapters!
Thanks for the work you did in assisting Prep in writing this story I'm enjoying!
11275346
As always, you are the sweetest! As 11275710 implied, we definitely have plans for the story going forward and have been in talks in terms of how to continue it past what you'll see in the few chapters I just released. So plenty of story left to go!
As for Caramel! I believe Krickis' words were: "He was a throwaway character and now whenever I write him I'm going to write him the way you did!" so I have a feeling you'll like the way he comes across. I certainly found him charming to work with ^_^
The chapter where the trio interact is out now and I simply cannot wait to see what you make of their dynamic.
Happy Reading!
Aww, finally got to read the end. Man, you sure do seem allergic to just letting people be happy, huh? :P
I kid, of course. If they were happy, then I couldn't read stories about them trying to be happier!
So there was obviously a good bit in the last couple chapters. I did finally get to see a bit of Caramel and the part he plays in Pinkie and Trixie’s relationship. Honestly, he seems like a good guy. It feels like he and I kinda share a similar philosophy on relationships. It feels wrong to stifle the choices that your partner can make. He may be a bit more secure in himself than me, but he's pretty cool.
He and Pinkie have a bit of an understated relationship in the story so far. Which is fair because so far its all been about Trixie and Pinkie figuring their thing out. He seems... Safer. More secure. In himself and in their relationship. Which, by the end of the story, seems to be the problem.
Clearly it feels like Trixie and Pinkie both like and respect him (at a minimum) and he returns that sentiment. However, his perceived security seems to hurt Pinkie (in Secondhand Laughter, since she doesn't feel he NEEDS her) and it hurts Trixie by removing a potential tether to Pinkie. Since Caramel is there, Trixie feels more comfortable with the possibility of "leaving" since Caramel will be there for Pinkie... But she doesn't seem to really understand the impact she had in Pinkie's life. Which is a possibility because Pinkie seems ashamed of admitting that she feels at her best when Trixie is at her worst and needs relies on Pinkie. The whole situation reminds me of the Nightingale Effect, where a caregiver can fall in love with a patient and then lose those feelings after their care is no longer needed. I'm not saying that is the extent of Pinkie's relationship with Trixie but it could be perceived that way. Just one more thing to keep Pinkie up at night, huh?
Sorry, that thought got away from me. In any case, I don't think it is Caramel's fault that his being better adjusted (or at least perceived that way) can be used as a crutch by both Pinkie and Trixie to indulge in their worst impulses, but it is interesting how his existence allows for it.
I thought it was super cute that Trixie made sure that Caramel was aware of what was up with herself and Pinkie... At least until the end when that scene was recontexualized a bit and I realized that Trixie may have been panicking about the possibility of suddenly being RESPONSIBLE someone. She knew Pinkie had her own demons and obviously feels that Caramel can be relied on to take care of Pinkie if and when she "leaves". If she were to break them up, though, then SHE would be responsible for Pinkie and she could lose the security blanket feeling she has that she could "leave" at any time and she wouldn't be ruining anyone else's life on the way out. If that IS the case, then I believe she is lying to herself, but then that isn't surprising considering her situation. I kinda wonder if Caramel might have picked up on any of those darker motivations when Trixie tried to assure him that she would immediately break things off if he wanted her to and that added to the awkwardness of his response. Not that I think he's aware of the particulars of her demons... But he could have sensed something was off.
For the record as well, I also believe that Trixie wants to be a good person and doesn't want to be a cheat either... But I feel like my above reasoning also makes sense as additional motivation.
All this to say, I could probably say more about that relationship but I can only spend so long typing this all out and I had other points I wanted to make!! I just wanted to stress how neat it was that I could see some real interesting dynamics going on. And all of their interactions were cute and funny and sweet. And I want more.
Aw man, I didn't even get to scratch at how Maud and Trixie new thing affects all of this... Oh noooooo...
Anyways, Gilda was a HUGE dork. The scene between her and Maud was equal parts cute and awkward as Gilda introduced herself like she was meeting Limestone's parents. Although I thought it was interesting that Maud seemed to think she was being unfair or jumping the gun in judging Trixie or Gilda before meeting them... But I thought she was pretty open minded (if cautious due to her care for her sister) during the whole story. Sure, she didn't immediately jump to trusting Gilda without knowing her, but she seemed fair and willing to meet and judge for herself. Better than her parents at least!
I liked the lesson of having things change and that being okay. Some things get better and some get worse... But they can't stay the same forever. We sometimes just have to trust. And seeing Marble come out of her shell was cool. I think Pinkie mentioned in... The Opening Act, maybe? That Marble may even be considering moving out on her own soon. Lots of places to explore with these characters!!
Sorry, I couldn't touch on everything I noticed or appreciated. I thought it was a good story, though, and despite my initial hesitation at a new narrating character in Maud, I thought it was a great addition to the continuity and exactly the kind of story I expected and wanted.
Thank you for the work you put into your writing. I hope to see more again someday! Good luck and happy writing!
11276672
Readers like you make writing worth doing. For real.
Thank you so much for taking this journey with me.
I'm glad you picked up on so much! The bit about how Caramel fits in perfectly to allow the other two to indulge in their worst impulses is wonderful analysis and having someone just flat out point out what I intended for them to get from the writing is just...amazing? There was so much intent behind Trixie in this and you just, spelled it out?
I couldn't be more grateful.
I'm also glad you enjoyed Gilda being an awkward dork and Marble moving out is certainly going to come up on the next thing so I'm glad that people, or at least you, remembered that it was foreshadowed. As you said, tons of places to go with this, and Krickis and I have been talking very excitedly about them all ^_^.
As for the lesson, that's one that's very dear to me since it's one I've personally had to learn.
Change isn't good. It isn't bad. Most of the time, it is just change.
So to the next change, shall we?
I look forward to seeing you there.
You can has review!
I read this about a month or two ago but neglected to write a review, so apologies about my memory being fuzzy.
It was nice to get an outside perspective on the entire Pinkie and Trixie situation. The Maud portrayal here is interesting; it feels a bit too distant from canon Maud to feel like her to me, but she's a good character here nonetheless. The Pie family dramas were also interesting, and I could relate with Maud feeling like she had to fix everything even though she couldn't and shouldn't.
Having not read any other stories with Caramel, I don't really get his deal, and as an aro ace I can't really wrap my head around the romantic situation here, but it seems to be working for them. Also, until it was mentioned he was an OC, I thought Caramel was meant to be that one background pony.
This was a good capstone (for now) for this particular plot branch.