• Member Since 1st Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

The Psychopath


My very first (self-published) book can be found on Amazon Kindle for 5 or 12 paperback! If you love dragons, give it a look! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CSM7QQ2M

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Source

This story is a sequel to Left Behind


After defeating the Broken Pony, Nightmare Moon is finally free to begin her plans to retake Equestria and restore it to its former glory. However, she is haunted by the ill portents she had been given and searches for signs of her sisters' fragments or the coming of any new alicorns.

On top of this, the king impedes the alicorn's work at every turn and tries to be rid of her just as frequently. So many things happening all at once and spiraling towards the doom the 'leftover tool' warned her about, but Nightmare Moon is determined. No creature will stop her goal, not even the dregs of Equestria's destroyers from so long ago.

Chapters (24)
Comments ( 187 )

Here we go

Off to a strong start, can't wait to see what else we learn about the history of Equestria.

"There's no stairs?" Sunny asked.

"There are. This is just quicker."

Wings, biach!

And as usual sunny can't get a breack

Nice, it be looking real good!

Worried this story won't have the same traction as the previous one. Sequels never get much attention :c

From my experience, the lack of traction with sequels is due to people not knowing there's a sequel. Doing things like putting a link at the end of the final chapter to the next story greatly helps with that.

Whelp, going off of the portal processes previous description, it looks like Sunny’s thesis next year will be made primarily of the ramblings of a pony with more than a few screws loose.

Love the work, honestly was a bit skeptical when I read the first story but now I'm really invested in Nightmare Moon and this world.

I don’t know how much the continuation is better or worse than the first part, but the story still intrigues me and is full of questions that I want to know the answers to.
I also wonder why the image of Celestia was chosen as the cover instead of the main characters.

The mare booted Sunny into the portal and followed in after the screaming unicorn.

11269389
I put that in the author notes of the last chapter of Left Behind. Thanks for the suggestion. Not sure why I never thought of that.

11269819
Unfortunately, many people won't bother to click on profiles to see what other stories there are. It's very strange that FimFiction automatically shows on the sequel that it is a sequel, but on the first story there's no reference to it. I would also recommend putting in the sequel link in the original's description.
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This I awsome i look forward to seeing more.

They went into a hatchling cave where eggs and newborn grubs were being evacuated by the caretakers, although a few of the small creatures were still waddling about. Several tried to garner Moon's attention, but when they realized she didn't even acknowledge their existence, they puffed up their faces angrily and moved away towards the next pony they noticed was present. Sunny glared at them, surprising the grubs. They bared their fangs at him, hissed, and quickly turned away.

Sunny should have hissed back

"There!" Moon groaned. "It's broken," she strained.

Stubborn old bat

Ok this is getting interesting, I'll refrain to say what I can see moon doing after the encounter with the false alicorn but I'll say that she needs to explain the night nobles that they are not completely wrong in their belief and that she might need their help with Sunny's family

Quite an interesting magical mystery.

Was this an attempt by Celestia to summon Luna back from the moon?

I'm so invested and I can't wait for more I hope to see more soon it's an amazing story

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I'm trying. Don't want to disappoint my readers, even if I am doing that right now :/

11289846
Hey your doing ok take your time I love this story but please take your time we an wait the wait will be worth it

There's only so much that can be done.

Why not just add lines like “Turning away the griffon spoke to his companions in a strange dialect”?

Avoid color coding and some italicizing. Just a thought

11308300
That is a good thought. It's just that sometimes there's only so much that can be done.

"Yes!" Moon shouted angrily. "Now stop your whinging and hurry up."

Whining*

11330269

whinge

  1. To complain or protest, especially in an annoying or persistent manner.
  2. To whine.

The MOAR you know

Some mysterious force now seeks to undo Nightmare Moon and will sacrifice any and all to do so.

Will this story be as long as the previous one?

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Don't know. I don't plan anything except the beginning and end when I write a story.

Interesting... very interesting...
I am excited to see more!... when you will of course...

I already thought that alicorn cultist had already died completely, but it seems that no one here dies forever.

Interesting, I figure there's some biasness to this retelling of events but I feel pretty sure he's not too far off the real events. I like how not everyone is one dimensional here: the king has actually showed concern for others (not often but still, heck it looked like he felt pity for the maid), the cultists may have had actual valid reasons for their actions, and nightmare moon is a living embodiment of grey area (lately she is at least). Also, I loved the idea of this powerful being singing his story badly. I'm excited to see what you do next.

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In the case of the false alicorn you'll learn why. Can't have something so important be left unanswered, can I?


11352184
I've written long enough to make use of my crappy song-writing as effectively as possible, and I loathe one-dimensional characters. Everyone is varied, even if they have identical goals.

I'm glad both turned out well and you could enjoy them.

That tale sounded very biased and a little exaggerated but that doesn't mean there isn't a grain of truth in it.

I see the word "changeling" several times when I think it's supposed to be "thestral"

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The two leaned forward to have a better look. Luna noticed their expressions turning dour.

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Pfooou. First 'changelings' and now 'Luna'. I've been looking at that changeling story of mine too much.

I wonder, was this door to keep something out, or to keep something in? Dun dunn dunnn

great story wish you had more I read both in one sitting! will wait with much anticipation for your next chapter! keep up the great work your stroy is fun and i love how you do nmm!!

Poor guard. But then again, he was kinda pushing his luck

"You'll be less antagonizing when war comes to your city, duchess," the griffin said stiffly

And just like that, you've signed your death warrant.

"I am Solar Flare, and I will have what's most precious to me returned!" she bellowed as she pointed her horn at Eckret.

Oh dear, another player has entered the game.

"I am Solar Flare, and I will have what's most precious to me returned!" she bellowed as she pointed her horn at Eckret.

SOLAR FLARE HAS JOINED THE GAME

"I am Solar Flare, and I will have what's most precious to me returned!" she bellowed as she pointed her horn at Eckret.

Is this Celestia in a nightmare form or another alicorn entirely?

Color me intrigued.

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