A world class assassin, transported to Equestria saves the city from Tempest Shadow's invasion, only to find that there's a much bigger plot looming over the horizon, and only the Storm King's commander can help him stop it.
I personally prefer the dialogue chapters. Dunno if I'm in the minority but I zoned out on the action scenes because I didn't really have a lot of reason to care about it.
I absolutely love Luna's depiction in this series. It fits her surprisingly well for being the logic driven one, if she were as easy to convince like Twilight or neutral like Celestia or Cadence it wouldn't have delivered this chapter as good as this is. Bravo! Looking forward for the next chapters.
"While I can't even begin to fathom why we're concerned over the life of a literal traitor, that does bring us to the reason we're all here in the first place-" Luna announced, before looking over to John, "-why in Tartarus did you save that mare's life?"
"Well if I lost my horn as a filly, I certainly wouldn't have launched an invasion against my own country." Luna shrugged.
Is she f******* serious right now!!!??? You may not lose your horn as a "cause" to becoming evil/bad.
( Even though I find it a little ridiculous and stupid that Tempest turn bad because of it. Isn't there horn prosthetics or something? Or why didn't she seek a audience with Celestia to fix her horn in the past instead? Celestia is compassionate after all. )
BUT, the jealousy of your sister did caused you to be a actual "traitor" yourself, by a royal civil war, and hostile takeover/usurping your sister from the throne. And technically, you are a "invader" against your own country as well. Because again, your attempted coup of the government is a literal invasion within itself.
Seriously, did give her terrible amnesia/memory loss of her own actions as Nightmare Moon? OR she does remember, but she likes being a hypocritical bitch on purpose, CrimsonWolf 360?
Because I doubt you will be forgettable of Nightmare Moon, and is just doing this to Luna on purpose?
So, why didn't you make someone like John Wick or even Twilight constantly remind Luna on who she was, when she is acting like this. Because this feels like a little plothole and inconsistent, because they can realistically say that against Luna's poor judgment.
I hope you can edited/added this tidbit.
Luna balked at her sister, "Redemption ? Sister, what is there to redeem in that mare?" She questioned, cutting Celestia off.
If that's the case? Then why do you deserve "redemption", Nightmare Moon.
If we treated you the same way as Tempest? Then you wouldn't be forgiven easily by Celestia, the elements won't cure/save you from the dark corruption. And will just be reimprison back to the moon.
I'm not saying I'm defending or excusing Tempest's own crimes and sins against Equestria/Ponykind. But I HATE that a literal ex-villain like Luna is acting like this.
"As much as I would love to take the fight to our enemies, sister, you just brought up the one problem with all of that. Can we trust this mare? All we know about her is that she's a traitor and eagerly gave us information about the Storm King at the first opportunity. For all we know, she could just be trying to lure us into a trap, or hay, she could betray us just as easily, and use the opportunity to escape back to him. However, this time, she'll have information about our defenses as well as John." Luna fired back.
Again, you are also a traitor and will have trust issues as well, Nightmare Moon!
John sighed, "Most of it's a blur. I remember being in some kind of metal structure... I was fighting some kind of creature. It looked like the Storm Soldiers, but it was a lot bigger," His eyes fell to the floor, "I was losing. Dying, even. All I can remember after that was a flash of light and it was gone. Then I heard her voice."
I still call that nightmare "premonition" BS! Him, losing to someone like the Storm King!!?? Pphhttt! Bull!
"A shipyard doesn't seem like the kind of place he would stash a weapon capable of rendering all of Equestria uninhabitable." Luna countered.
Actually, villains and evil/corrupt corporations DO hide or ship their various weapons from many fictional media. So, you are very wrong there. Because, the Storm King isn't the "smart" type. ( At least in the movie. )
"Maybe not, but it's probably where he'd load the weapons onto his airships when he plans on attacking." John rebutted.
Isn't is obvious?" Luna asked, rhetorically, "He has no magical abilities whatsoever. He has no claws, talons, wings, or fangs. The only tools he has to fight with are his weapons. If our enemies realize that the only reason every threat to face Equestria in the last few years has been put down in seconds, is because of one mortal man that can only fight if he has his weapons, they'll conjure any number of schemes to target him, and take him out of the equation altogether. Worse, they could find and steal his weapons to use against us." She explained.
"That won't happen." John said, reassuringly.
Stop doubting John's abilities. He isn't stupid for not protecting or safeguarding his own guns/weaponry. And the baddies CAN'T just use guns overnight. Training with guns takes time! There is gun safety and police/military training on guns after all.
I bet they will stupidity shoot themselves in the foot, their heads, or friendly fire. So maybe let them have some for a few minutes. Just for giggles. And then get them back after you had your fun.
Plus, IF he can weaponize a frickin pencil! Then you should reconsider what you are saying, Luna.
"And who's to stop it from happening? Unreformed changelings are still out there and cling to Chrysalis's ideology. They can infiltrate our defenses quite easily, even with our new countermeasures since the wedding. An army ten thousand strong would overwhelm even you, with all your weapons at your disposal. If they knew they only had to wait a few decades for you to die of old age, they'd simply bide their time until you were gone. Don't misunderstand me, John. I appreciate the things you've done for us, and I have an enormous amount of respect for you, but we have to be realistic. If they knew your weaknesses, our enemies would exploit them, posthaste." Luna responded.
Damn! You have a point there. I like John Wick, but ain't no Doom Slayer or a DC Comics/Marvel/DBZ/Naruto character.
"We're not mind controlling anypony. That's barbaric and wrong." Celestia declared, a heavy frown on her face.
"And execution wasn't?" Twilight whispered.
HAH! Twilight gots you there. Hypocrisy right there.
Luna hummed, "This... could work. I still have serious reservations about letting her out. Even with a full detachment of guards, that mare is dangerous." She said.
John Wick is WAY MORE dangerous than her, and he did KICK her ass! So, what's the big frickin deal, Luna?
You're just overreacting, overestimating Tempest, and underestimating John here. Plus, the guards can't do crap and suck, so only let John watch her.
P.S. Now that I mentioned it. Weren't you "dangerous" yourself, Nightmare Moon!?
Heck, you are a lot MORE dangerous than Tempest if you turn back into Nightmare Moon, and wasn't holding back your Alicorn powers. Eternal Night is a whole lot more deadlier to Equestria and the entire world than a simple invasion.
You were just caught off guard. And you already got rid of the petrifying orb grenades.
I doubt Tempest with a broken horn ( And without the stone orb grenades ) will take on a prepared and full powered alicorn like Luna/Nightmare Moon.
And speaking of the Alicorns. All of them can be more dangerous as well if they weren't holding back, or got "corrupted" as well ( Daybreaker, Nightmare Moon, Midnight Sparkle, Heart Breaker/Cadence, etc. ).
Do I need to go on?
"The royal guard can be discreet. They have training in covert protection operations and plainclothes uniforms that would blend in well in nearly every environment. We can spare one detail for this mission." Celestia rebutted.
Well, that DIDN'T help them against the various villains in the past, now would it?
So, I call this overconfidence and bull crap!
"An early warning system? John, the royal guard can be much more useful than just that. Besides, what's to stop Tempest from attacking you while you sleep? You have to rest at some point." Luna shook her head.
"The royal guard hasn't been able to stop any threat Equestria's faced since I got here, and apparently before that for hundreds of years as well," John frowned, "Besides, Twilight can put some enchantments on the collar to keep her at bay while I sleep, right?" He asked looking to Twilight.
He is frickin correct. Even after seeing the guard's incompetence and being failures of their jobs. Why the hell do you two ( Celestia/Luna ) still have "faith" in your guards? Are you frickin blind and deaf?
"The royal guard has a history of not being able to complete the mission, and if the threat is as serious as I think it is, we can't afford to have guards getting in the way." John countered.
"That's not a fair comparison, John. Those threats were much larger than a unicorn with a broken horn." Celestia replied.
"Are they trained to fight a pony that took three of you out in thirty seconds?" John raised an eyebrow.
Exactly, John is right once again. Celestia, why do you still have overconfidence and "faith" with the guards, IF they really suck at their jobs?
Am I high, or did the text get smaller?
Other than that, this is a great chapter! I am fully invested in this story, keep up the great work!
Edit: yea, I was high
Ooooo!!! Yes. Go John! I am glad Tempest survived.
Wow, John really knows his stuff. And Luna should learn, never mess with John Wick.
I personally prefer the dialogue chapters. Dunno if I'm in the minority but I zoned out on the action scenes because I didn't really have a lot of reason to care about it.
I absolutely love Luna's depiction in this series. It fits her surprisingly well for being the logic driven one, if she were as easy to convince like Twilight or neutral like Celestia or Cadence it wouldn't have delivered this chapter as good as this is. Bravo! Looking forward for the next chapters.
11367193
I'm glad you liked it :D
I was a bit worried that she might come across too harshly, but I am happy to see that my fear was pretty much unfounded lol.
I hope you like what I have in store for the rest of the story :)
Edit: Finished.
Is she f******* serious right now!!!??? You may not lose your horn as a "cause" to becoming evil/bad.
( Even though I find it a little ridiculous and stupid that Tempest turn bad because of it. Isn't there horn prosthetics or something? Or why didn't she seek a audience with Celestia to fix her horn in the past instead? Celestia is compassionate after all. )
BUT, the jealousy of your sister did caused you to be a actual "traitor" yourself, by a royal civil war, and hostile takeover/usurping your sister from the throne. And technically, you are a "invader" against your own country as well. Because again, your attempted coup of the government is a literal invasion within itself.
Seriously, did give her terrible amnesia/memory loss of her own actions as Nightmare Moon? OR she does remember, but she likes being a hypocritical bitch on purpose, CrimsonWolf 360?
Because I doubt you will be forgettable of Nightmare Moon, and is just doing this to Luna on purpose?
So, why didn't you make someone like John Wick or even Twilight constantly remind Luna on who she was, when she is acting like this. Because this feels like a little plothole and inconsistent, because they can realistically say that against Luna's poor judgment.
I hope you can edited/added this tidbit.
If that's the case? Then why do you deserve "redemption", Nightmare Moon.
If we treated you the same way as Tempest? Then you wouldn't be forgiven easily by Celestia, the elements won't cure/save you from the dark corruption. And will just be reimprison back to the moon.
I'm not saying I'm defending or excusing Tempest's own crimes and sins against Equestria/Ponykind. But I HATE that a literal ex-villain like Luna is acting like this.
Again, you are also a traitor and will have trust issues as well, Nightmare Moon!
I still call that nightmare "premonition" BS! Him, losing to someone like the Storm King!!?? Pphhttt! Bull!
Actually, villains and evil/corrupt corporations DO hide or ship their various weapons from many fictional media. So, you are very wrong there. Because, the Storm King isn't the "smart" type. ( At least in the movie. )
Exactly.
Edit: Done.
Stop doubting John's abilities. He isn't stupid for not protecting or safeguarding his own guns/weaponry. And the baddies CAN'T just use guns overnight. Training with guns takes time! There is gun safety and police/military training on guns after all.
I bet they will stupidity shoot themselves in the foot, their heads, or friendly fire. So maybe let them have some for a few minutes. Just for giggles. And then get them back after you had your fun.
Plus, IF he can weaponize a frickin pencil! Then you should reconsider what you are saying, Luna.
Damn! You have a point there. I like John Wick, but ain't no Doom Slayer or a DC Comics/Marvel/DBZ/Naruto character.
HAH! Twilight gots you there. Hypocrisy right there.
John Wick is WAY MORE dangerous than her, and he did KICK her ass! So, what's the big frickin deal, Luna?
You're just overreacting, overestimating Tempest, and underestimating John here. Plus, the guards can't do crap and suck, so only let John watch her.
P.S. Now that I mentioned it. Weren't you "dangerous" yourself, Nightmare Moon!?
Heck, you are a lot MORE dangerous than Tempest if you turn back into Nightmare Moon, and wasn't holding back your Alicorn powers. Eternal Night is a whole lot more deadlier to Equestria and the entire world than a simple invasion.
You were just caught off guard. And you already got rid of the petrifying orb grenades.
I doubt Tempest with a broken horn ( And without the stone orb grenades ) will take on a prepared and full powered alicorn like Luna/Nightmare Moon.
And speaking of the Alicorns. All of them can be more dangerous as well if they weren't holding back, or got "corrupted" as well ( Daybreaker, Nightmare Moon, Midnight Sparkle, Heart Breaker/Cadence, etc. ).
Do I need to go on?
Well, that DIDN'T help them against the various villains in the past, now would it?
So, I call this overconfidence and bull crap!
He is frickin correct. Even after seeing the guard's incompetence and being failures of their jobs. Why the hell do you two ( Celestia/Luna ) still have "faith" in your guards? Are you frickin blind and deaf?
Exactly, John is right once again. Celestia, why do you still have overconfidence and "faith" with the guards, IF they really suck at their jobs?
Also, nice burn there.
Eh, I don’t know, Princess. Your history kinda says otherwise... 🤔
11413317
Luna's just pissed that Tempest got the best of her hehe.