A Death in the Apple Family
Part 1: Funeral
She expected to be tired by now.
Grand Pear dapped his eyes for the second time while he shared a story about Granny from when they were kids. “Those Canterlot investors learned to fear the name ‘Smith’ after that. She was fiercer than a firecracker on a dry summer night,” he said. “Only thing she loved more than the farm was her family.” He looked directly at Applejack with two sad eyes.
Keep your chin up.
After Granny Smith passed, Applejack had been tired every day. Oh, she was still early to rise and early to rest, and always quick to pull a plough or pick some apples. But most times, it was paperwork she had to deal with. She had to handle the insurance policies, review existing orders for the farm’s apples and cider, and handle the mortgage payments on the new fields they had purchased just two months ago.
All that, plus she had to arrange the funeral, she had to inform the Apple family, and she had to keep her spirits up while she was giving lessons at the School of Friendship. What happened to just waking up and picking apples all day?
The only reason her mind didn’t give in was the same reason she could last through the funeral. She looked around and saw that there were ponies who cared.
Everyone made it a point to show up. Every relative of the Apples, including the Pears and Oranges, was in attendance. Moreover, friends of the family were there as well. Rarity cancelled a fashion show just to be a shoulder to lean on. Pinkie Pie cleared her schedule the moment she heard the news just so she could help organise the funeral invites. Fluttershy, preferring to go unnoticed, joined after the rest, but let Applejack know her door would be open whenever she was needed.
Even Princess Twilight herself put the entire royal court on hold to spend the day with her.
Applejack quit her gazing and brought her attention back to the speaker. Grand Pear had stepped down and let Babs Seed take the stage.
“I wanted to start by saying how much Granny Smith meant to me growing up. Even though it was far from home, the Apple family farm was always a place I felt safe. And Granny helped make it feel that way.”
Applejack took a closer look as she spoke, stunned to realise she wasn’t looking down at a little filly anymore. Babs was a good bit taller than when she last visited, and was clearly used to wearing the kind of makeup that fillies in the city liked.
No, she caught herself. Young mares, not fillies. Babs was nearly full-grown. And though her mascara and eyeliner would drip after a day in a hot field, Applejack had to admit, she looked as pretty as a young mare could possibly be.
Ought to visit Manehattan for a change. Shouldn’t have to wait for a funeral to see my niece grow up.
“The thing I’ll miss the most is how it never mattered how far I lived away, or what mistakes I made as a kid,” Applejack noticed Babs giving Applebloom a quick glance, "Granny Smith always cared, she treated me like an Apple when I needed it.”
She bowed her head respectfully and whispered a few private words over the coffin, and then sat back down beside Applebloom.
More went. One after the other, there wasn’t a single member of the Apple family who didn’t have a story about Granny Smith’s love for her family.
And when every pony had said their share, they all watched as Rarity and Twilight lent their horns, levitating the coffin and nestling it perfectly into the ground.
When it was over and everyone had said their goodbyes and assurances, shedding one last tear together in the process, relatives and family friends left in pairs or in groups, returning to their lives. For them, the funeral was sad but not much had changed. Goldy Delicious could return to her cats and add one more memory to the family scrapbook. Babs would return to Manehattan and go to school the next day.
“I wish I could stay longer,” Twilight said after a letter arrived through Spike’s flame delivery. “But there’s a disagreement between the hippogriffs and dragons that can’t be put off.”
“Ain’t gonna keep you here,” Applejack said, hugging her dear friend. “You got more responsibilities than the lot of us. Go.” The Princess nodded, and in a flash of teleporting magic, she was gone.
Applejack scanned around. Applebloom had already run off with her friends and her cousin Babs. She would have liked to talk to her little sister for a while, but she knew sometimes kids needed their friends to sort out family trouble. Big Mac was some distance away, too, talking to his wife Sugar Belle by the barn.
Her brother didn’t have a way with words, but that was usually with strangers. At home, when things were serious, he said what needed to be said. Now he was different. In the month since they found Granny Smith in the most peaceful sleep of her life, he grew quieter, barely saying a word at breakfast and always taking off to finish every chore so Applejack could handle the funeral.
For Applebloom, Big Mac still made an effort, and the two sometimes went over to the orchard where their parents had gotten married to talk. But between them, Applejack just couldn’t cross whatever barrier Big Mac had put up. In more ways than one, Granny’s death had made Applejack feel lonelier.
“Darling,” Rarity touched her shoulder, bringing her out of her own thoughts, “why don’t we go inside and brew up some tea? It’ll be good to get your mind off of things.”
Applejack nodded. In truth, the mourning had passed over her. Granny Smith was older than old, and they had been ready to say their farewells for some time before she passed. It made the work that came with her passing tolerable. Though, that also made it harder for Applejack to understand why Big Mac could hardly say two words to her before running off to do chores.
“I brought lemons and hibiscus tea we could use,” Fluttershy offered.
“That sounds mighty fine right about now,” Applejack smiled.
But they had all taken only a few steps towards the house when the sound of rushing wind came. Her friends turned to see, but Applejack kept her head down. She didn’t need to look to recognise the sound of her partner’s wing flaps.
“I came as quickly as I could!” Rainbow Dash was breathing hard, still dressed in her Wonderbolt uniform. “I’m not too late, am I?”
Suddenly, every anxiety and anguish she felt leading up to the funeral swelled back up like high tide, and Rainbow was the moon. The motley mare was a piece of work. Competitive beyond reason but yet fiercely loyal, seeing her only put the memory of asking her on a first date back into Applejack’s mind.
She counted the months under her breath. They had known each other for years, been best friends and great rivals for most of that time, but only in the last six months did that friendship crystallise into something new. Maybe the components had always been there, but one of them had to be the first to say it.
I asked her, Applejack remembered. I picked the place. Dinner at the Friendship Castle.
Pinkie Pie was over to her in an instant. “Dashie! Good, ole Dashie, one of our nearest and dearest friends. So glad you could make it with your incredibly busy schedule. How was the flight?”
Applejack stared as Rainbow Dash took one good look around at the emptied field where the funeral had been held, where chairs had been folded up and the coffin had already been buried. She had that shocked, blank expression that she always used when she flew too close to the sun.
Memories swirled like a tempest in Applejack’s head. She asked Rainbow out. She set up their first date. She set up every date. She invited her over to the farm on late nights. She arranged the harvesting schedules so she’d have days off to cheer at Wonderbolt shows. She put every ounce of effort into their new relationship.
Now her glare was as black as the night. What have I asked of you?
“You don’t have to do that, Pinkie,” Rainbow said, pushing the pink, poofy-haired pony back. Though it was springtime and the sun was still gentle, Rainbow Dash cast her eyes down, seeming to wilt like a raisin as Applejack continued to look at her.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I came as fast as I could, honest! But our show in Mount Aris went longer than I expected. I thought I had more time.”
But Applejack merely scoffed, taking her leave for the house. “Don’t try to make excuses. Two weeks! Two weeks ago you said nothing would keep you away. What, were the reservists busy?”
“N-no, but—” Rainbow began, but it was clear she had no defence against Applejack. “I don’t know how many times I have to say, but I truly am sorry. I’ll say it for the rest of my life if I have to. I just,” Rainbow took a minute to keep her voice from whimpering, something Applejack had rarely seen her girlfriend do. “I just don’t want you to be mad at me.”
She paused outside the door and stared at Rainbow. “Mad?” Despite her frustration, Applejack managed to shoot back a sharp laugh. “Oh, Celestia knows this would be easy if I could be mad at you, Rainbow Dash.”
“But you’re not,” the Wonderbolt said, the tone in her voice dreading what would come next.
Applejack let the silence hang in the air for a moment while she waited at the door. Anger was easy, and she knew it was what Rainbow was hoping for. They could work through plain anger. Luna knew they already had if her dreams were anything to go by.
But, it was as she said. Being mad was easy. She considered shouting, screaming at her about every past grievance, calling this the last straw, and slamming the door in her face. Rainbow would feel bad, awful even with their friends around to see the outburst, but it would still be a mercy compared to what she wanted to do.
But she was done doing favours for Rainbow Dash. It was high time she did something for herself.
“No,” she finally said, “I ain’t mad. I’m just tired Rainbow. Think I have been for a while now.” She turned to Pinkie Pie. “Sorry to cut the party short, sugarcube, but I think I just want to rest right now.”
Pinkie Pie watched sadly from the window of the Sugarcube Corner as Rainbow ate away her feelings. It was foolishness, undoubtedly, to think that pastries and candy could make the ills of the heart go away. Eating so much at once usually just brought ills of the stomach to join it.
When Pinkie was a child, she had wanted nothing more than to make those around her smile. She thought herself a master at her craft, but her family’s rock farm wasn’t even large enough to be seen on a map, and Ponyville was one of the most welcoming towns in Equestria. In reality, she had only been challenged on a few occasions. Hardly enough to call herself a paragon of laughter.
But she knew one thing, at least. She couldn’t make someone happy unless they wanted to be, and Rainbow Dash had an aura of self-loathing that was as strong as they came.
“My girlfriend hates me,” the pegasus muttered.
“No, Applejack doesn’t hate you,” Pinkie assured. “If right now Discord lost his mind and turned you into a flower pot, she’d still do anything to get you back.” She then quickly flashed a glance at every corner of the bakery.
“Don’t you get any ideas, buster,” she shouted out to the void, “I know you’re listening!”
“Just stop, Pinkie.” Rainbow stuck her straw in her mouth and blew into her drink, forming a thick layer of bubbles above the grape-flavoured soda pop. “Discord’s friends with Big Mac, he’s probably coming up with some insane plan to make him feel better.”
She groaned, pressing her hooves over her head. “Ugh, now Discord even sounds like a better friend than me.”
“By my calculations, it’ll be a week until the silent treatment wears off,” Pinkie said. “Are you going to spend that time stuffing yourself? Or are you going to have the best gosh-darn apology when she finally talks to you again?”
“Sorry,” Rainbow said, “but I don’t even know if I deserve the chance. I mean, it was Granny Smith’s funeral! How could I miss that? How?”
She had the look of a puppy with wet, miserable eyes, but Pinkie had little interest in coddling the grown mare. Even the idea of creating pleasurable party pursuits with her powers of pep and persuasion was hardly compelling. There had been a hangpony’s noose slack around the neck of Applejack and Rainbow’s relationship, but now Pinkie could see it tightening. And she was going to cut them free.
“I have just the thing.” Pinkie Pie, always being prepared for interpersonal tension, reached behind a framed picture of the Cake twins hanging by the door and pulled out a doctor’s stethoscope. “The love doctor is in.”
“Pinkie, how are you a love doctor?” Rainbow asked. “Have you ever dated anyone?”
“Well, things are steady with Cheese right now, but he’s off travelling and— No!” Pinkie pushed her thoughts away. “This is about you right now. There’s only one question you have to ask yourself. What’s more important to you, forgiveness or regret?”
Rainbow blinked. “What?”
“Answer the question!”
“Ah! Okay!” The Wonderbolt sat up in her seat, responding to Pinkie’s yelling as if she were a cadet again. “Forgiveness, I guess.”
“Wrong!” Pinkie stuck her tongue out mockingly.
“Wait, really? How am I supposed to fix this without forgiveness?” Rainbow said, trying to sound snappy though her tired voice wouldn’t allow it.
“If you think like that, your apology won’t be worth a single apple,” Pinkie said. “Apologies aren’t for forgiveness, they’re for telling the other pony you realise you were wrong. Forgiveness will come when that pony thinks you deserve to feel better.”
“I know I was wrong!” Rainbow slammed her hoof down. “And I apologised, but AJ still didn’t accept it. What am I supposed to do about that?”
“Try harder, be better,” Pinkie said. “I mean, Applejack’s one of our closest, hard-working-est, thoughtful-est friends ever. And, if I’m being honest, she’s about as good at being loyal as you are. Maybe even more. Don’t you want to put in the effort to make her happy?”
“Of course.” Rainbow sipped her soda. “But I guess it’s not enough. At first I thought she was pulling my tail when she asked me out, but once I realised she was serious, I tried everything! She’s always busy with the farm so I let her pick our dates, I get her free tickets to every Wonderbolt show, and I help around the farm whenever I can even though I can never do the chores exactly how she wants it. It's like she doesn’t appreciate everything I do.”
“Then let her know,” Pinkie said, “or ask her what she expects from you. Even if everything you said is true—and I mean that’s a bit of a big if, you’re kinda a mess half the time so I dunno if it’s how you say it is—you pretty much tipped the scales today. Talk to her and make things right.”
“But you said I should have my apology ready by the time AJ talks to me. Now I’m just supposed to go up to her and ask? That’ll make her even madder!”
“I know what I said!” Pinkie screeched, exasperating herself. “Listen, this is a very delicate situation you’re in. You gotta plan this very carefully, capisce?”
“Look, I don’t have it in me to deal with you right now,” Rainbow said, getting up off her seat. “I just want to be alone.” The Wonderbolt dragged her hooves out to the street and flapped her wings, kicking up a cloud of dust before trailing off.
“Maybe you can focus on that feeling to sympathise with Applejack!” Pinkie shouted after her, but she doubted the words made it. Rainbow Dash was long gone.
Part 2: Blood Ties
“It was clear to me at that moment that Rainbow Dash wasn’t going to fix her own problems. I could’ve left her to her own devices, but what kind of friend would I have been? After all, I was Pinkie Pie, attorney-at-love, and Rainbow Dash’s little predicament was soggier than a bath sponge living at the bottom of the sea. Something had to be done. But what? I didn’t know. But I knew who could point me in the right direction. Mrs Cake. The question was, how was I going to track down a mare as busy as her?”
“Pinkie, I’m right here,” Mrs Cake cut off the monologue. After only five minutes of listening to Pinkie get in character, she was already rubbing her head. “And I thought you told Rainbow you’re a love doctor. Now you’re an attorney?”
“I drew a long drag from my cigar, pondering my next move. She was crafty, that Mrs Cake, and quick with her words too. I was going to have to be craftier and quicker if I wanted information.”
“Well, that’s very kind of you to say, dearie,” Mrs Cake said with a smile before the expression faded away into an imposing scowl. “But you know the house rules. No vaping in the bakery!” She snatched the e-cigarette from Pinkie and locked it in the cash register. “Honestly, the twins are still kids.”
“Aw, but it’s chocolate raspberry flavoured,” Pinkie whined, “besides, the twins are almost as old as Applebloom when she got her cutie mark.”
“I said no, Pinkie,” Mrs Cake put her hoof down. “Now let’s get on to brass tacks. This issue between Applejack and Rainbow Dash, what exactly do you think is going to happen if you get involved?”
Pinkie shrugged. “That’s the problem, I’m not sure. I’m great at friendship stuff, but that’s all platonic. After planning Lyra and Bon Bon’s wedding I thought I knew all about romance, but I’m just a wet noodle.”
“Aw, honey, don’t beat yourself up about it. Some relationships can be… more challenging than others.” Mrs Cake stroked Pinkie’s mane. “But my advice? Let them handle it. I know you girls are all best friends and believe me, my heart aches for Applejack. Poor girl’s been through enough. But this thing they’ve got going on, they have to sort it out.”
“But,” Pinkie started, but paused when the words couldn’t come out. She could count the number of times that had happened on her hooves. It was only a limit of four, but that’s just how rarely it happened.
“How can you just watch someone you love suffer like that without helping out?” she finally asked. “Applejack’s an honorary Pie, and I’m an honorary Apple. I can’t just sit this one out. I’m the Element of Laughter, this is the one thing I do!”
“I know it is, and you’ll probably end up doing something no matter what I say. Just try and take it easy. Sometimes all it takes is time.”
Papers piled up on the dining table after breakfast was cleared. Applebloom did the chores in the house now, leaving Applejack to read the day’s mail. There was a letter from the mayor’s office today, regarding the registration of the farm’s many carts. Applejack didn’t know why carts had to be registered, they were nothing special, but they had to be done.
“Thought you sent in those forms last week?” Applebloom asked, taking a peak as she put the dishes into the sink.
“I did,” Applejack said, “must’ve gotten lost through the mail. Honestly, post office ain’t more’n a half-hour’s walk away from city hall. I could’ve made that delivery myself. Looks like I’m gonna have to.”
“Today?” Applebloom asked.
“Of course. Why? Something else going on?”
Applebloom gave her older sister a confused look. “Don’t you remember? You were going to hop over to Goldy Delicious to drop off some of Granny’s stuff for safekeeping. Gonna need that room pretty soon.”
“Shoot, I forgot.” Applejack nibbled nervously on her lower lip. A bad habit she was starting to develop.
Applebloom’s last words stung. The funeral was two days ago and they were already talking about clearing out Granny Smith’s room. Applejack had wanted to clean it up before, but just keeping the farm running and planning the funeral took up so much time that it was just easier to leave it as it had been. No one was using it, anyhow.
Her thoughts stalled. “Hold on one second. Why are we gonna need Granny’s room?”
Applebloom seemed to grow pale for a moment. “Uh, no reason. Forget I said anything.”
“Alright then, in any case, I’ll have to let Goldy Delicious know that I’ll have to go next week. It’s a day’s trip, there and back, and I gotta get this registration handled.”
“I can send that letter to Goldy,” her little sister said. “Hopefully it doesn’t get lost in the mail.”
“If you’re headed to the post office, could you stop by Whirlpool’s appliance shop?”
Applebloom tilted her head. “What for?”
Applejack nodded towards the sink. “Granny never liked dishwashing machines, but I think it’s high time we get one, don’t you? I just need you to look around for ones that’ll fit, and get a quote for the installation.”
“I can do that. Any preference on colour?”
Applejack shrugged. “You’re old enough to decide that. I’ve been so busy, I figured house matters are up to you now.”
“Really?” Applebloom’s knees almost buckled, and she had to lean herself against the countertop.
“You good?” Applejack asked.
“Yeah, reckon I can handle it.”
“Alright then.” Applejack sorted the rest of the mail, mostly adverts and coupon books, into one pile. Then she stood up. “I’ll head out then. Gonna grab something from my office at school ‘fore I head over to city hall.”
The extension buildings of the School of Friendship were dotted around the Castle of Friendship, incorporating it into the campus to be used both as overflow student housing and library.
Applejack still wouldn’t consider herself an academic pony, she learned much better by doing than studying, but she found the school to be a comforting place to get away from the farm. Part of her knew she had to relax, but she was never good at putting off work. Going to her office was somewhere in between, letting her separate herself from farm work while still being able to work on something.
She slowed her gait as she reached the faculty offices and then proceeded to check the other buildings. There weren’t classes for her to teach today, but she wasn’t so sure of everyone else’s schedules.
She let out a sigh of relief when she pressed her ear to the door of Rainbow’s office. No sound. Good.
“Applejack!”
“Gah!” She spun around to see Pinkie Pie, mane frazzled beyond comprehension, staring at her eagerly.
“Please tell me I’ve been overthinking things and you’re here because you’re looking for Rainbow Dash because you really really really want to talk to her.”
“Sorry, Pinkie, I don’t have time for whatever scheme you got going on.”
“I’ll take that as a ‘no,’” Pinkie huffed. “Great, now I’m going to have to talk to Maud.”
“Something wrong between you and your sister?” Applejack asked.
“No,” Pinkie said frankly, “it’s that stupid boyfriend of hers and his stupid, dull face. Ugh!”
“Thought you accepted him?”
“Oh Applejack,” Pinkie Pie laughed haughtily, “I will never accept that stick-in-the-mud sister-stealer! Tolerate him? I can do that. But the moment they ever break up, Mudbriar better watch his back.”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “What did he do?”
“What didn’t he do?” Pinkie yelled. “Last year, during Hearth's Warming, he called my log cake an ‘inaccurate imitation of Vanhoover pine.’ Oh if I ever find him alone in an alley—”
“Slow down, girl,” Applejack put a hoof on Pinkie, “let’s ease off the ultraviolence for a second. Why you gotta talk to Maud, anyhow?”
Pinkie blinked. “No reason.”
“Applebloom said that this morning,” Applejack’s face soured. “Seems like lotta folks are keeping things from me today. Come on Pinkie, spill it.”
“Nope, I’ve said too much,” Pinkie turned, but before she could escape Applejack ran around and cut her off.
In a straight chase, Applejack didn’t doubt Pinkie could outrun her. The mare had strength to spare just from the near-constant sugar high she lived on. But even that wasn’t enough to compete with a born-and-raised farm pony. One glare was all she needed to give to let Pinkie know she wasn’t going to give up. She could run, but sooner or later, her sugar rush would run out, and she’d just be answering while tired and out of breath.
“Oh, alright,” Pinkie sighed. “I’m trying to get advice on how to get you and Dashie back together.”
“Back…” Applejack’s voice trailed off. “We ain’t even broken up! What do you mean ‘back together?’”
“Well you’ve been avoiding Rainbow ever since the funeral,” Pinkie explained, “and she thinks you hate her now too. So I’m just trying to make everything right before it’s too late and you two grow apart forever.”
Grow apart? Applejack pressed her forehead into her hoof. Luna knew there were times she wished she didn’t have to look at Rainbow Dash, but despite their bickering, she didn’t think it was possible. They’d faced down villains and travelled across all of Equestria together. Discord, Tirek, the Storm King, and others; their friendship had seen more in a few short years than some saw in a lifetime.
So why is it so hard to just show up when I need you?
Applejack ground her teeth and focused back on Pinkie. “I never said I hate her, Pinkie. We just need some time to cool our heads off, that’s all. I’ll forgive her when she apologises properly. I just can’t seem to say no to that girl.”
“That’s what I’m trying to figure out!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Rainbow won’t do it because she thinks she’s a screw-up and everything she tries to do never gets appreciated. So now it’s up to me, Pinkie Pie, attorney-at-love.”
“Wait one apple-picking minute, she said what?” Applejack’s nostrils flared. “She thinks I don’t appreciate her?”
“More or less,” Pinkie nodded, realising too late the wildfire she had started. “B-but she wasn’t using it as an excuse for her behaviour. She really does want to make it up to you, she just doesn’t know how.”
“Oh, I’ll bet,” Applejack huffed, “just like how she doesn’t know how hard it is to always be the only one putting in the effort. What in Equestria has she done that I’m supposed to be so appreciative of? Every time we’ve gone out together it’s because I had to go and arrange it!”
“That’s actually funny, because she was saying that—”
“And the funeral wasn’t the only thing she was late for. Applebloom’s birthday was a few months ago. Had to do that all by myself too, even though she said she’d help.”
Applejack’s lips curled into a scowl. “Celestia help me, I don’t know what’s worse, that she don’t think my needs are important enough to take time out of her oh-so busy Wonderbolt training, or that she expects me to appreciate her. Ha!”
She tried holding her breath, tried suffocating the anger out of herself before it suffocated her back, but it was like playing chicken against a training. Eventually, she had to give.
“ARGH!” Applejack kicked open her office.
“Applejack…” Pinkie tried to calm her, putting a hoof on her shoulder, but Applejack shirked her away.
She yanked open the drawers of her desk, throwing pens and old papers on the floor until she pulled out a slightly-crumpled copy of a cart registration form.
“What’s that for?” Pinkie asked.
“Don’t change the subject,” Applejack snapped. “Wasn’t mad before, but I reckon I got reason to be now. Don’t go beatin’ yourself about it, none’s gonna blame yuh fer trying t’fix things. But a dirty rug’s gotta be beaten out in the sun. Our problem ain’t yurs t’deal with.”
Applejack slammed the door behind her and took off through the extension building, moving like all of Tartarus was on her hooves so the student didn’t have to see her angry. That luxury, she was reserving for one pony in particular.
“Maud! It’s all my fault!”
Pinkie was shuddering in her older sister’s arms, her weeps echoing in the underground cavern system that had become home to the rock-obsessed mare. Though Maud had never been quite like other ponies, when it came to her sister, there were few who could claim to know her better.
Maud had prepared a platter of cookies and doughnuts for Pinkie, along with an assortment of rock sugar candies to remind her of their home. The rock farm always managed to calm Pinkie down, returning memories of better days. But not this time, it seemed.
Pinkie had told her everything both Rainbow and Applejack had said, presenting both sides in the hopes of shining her older sister’s wisdom on the differences between them. But between the sobbing and panicking, it was difficult for Maud to get a word in.
“There, there,” Maud said flatly, combing her sister’s hair straight.
They sat together on her bed, pretty much the only cushioned spot in the whole cave system, save for the moss carpeting. Knitted covers wrapped over the naturally luminescent crystals in the caves’ stalactites, dimming the cave to just the right amount of mood lighting for a dramatic sob.
“You should’ve seen her, Applejack’s never been so mad before,” Pinkie cried. “And I’m the one who made her that way!”
“I did see her. At the funeral,” Maud said. “We heard the argument while we were walking away.”
“Right, I forgot you were there,” Pinkie murmured. “I hardly saw you.”
“You know me. Unless it’s stand-up comedy, I’m not very good at talking to ponies,” Maud said. “It’s probably for the best. Ponies say my voice can be uncomfortable to listen to. And I didn’t know Granny Smith that well. I was just there because I felt sad for Applejack.”
“Of course you did,” Pinkie Pie hugged her back. “That’s why you’re my Best Pie Sister Friend Forever! So tell me, how am I going to fix this?”
“Technically, you don’t have to.”
Pinkie Pie shot a glare through the crook of Maud’s hug, glaring at Mudbriar. The greyish brown stallion set a plate of rock candy on the table by Maud. He was as thin as the sticks he obsessed over, and Pinkie swore he’d snap in half if she stared hard enough. But Mudbriar didn’t budge.
“You were just the messenger. It’s their lack of communication and toxic need for competition that’s the real problem.”
“What would you know about them?” Pinkie snapped.
He shrugged. “I’ve made a passing study of romantic literature. The trope of ‘opposites attract’ is popular for a reason. When personalities are too similar, both partners will inevitably overstep some boundaries and disturb each other.”
Pinkie wiped snot and tears from her face and sat up from Maud’s embrace. “You and Maud are pretty similar, how come you don’t overstep boundaries?”
“We do,” Maud answered. “We like each other, but we’ve had some arguments in the past.”
“Really?” Pinkie looked at her sister, surprised. “But you’re always talking about how he’s everything you want and how he makes you happy.” She cast a disgusted look at Mudbriar. “Somehow.”
“Because he does,” Maud nodded slightly. “That doesn’t mean we don’t have differences to work out. I enjoy rocks, he enjoys sticks.” Maud glanced at her boyfriend. “It’s a forbidden relationship.”
Pinkie narrowed her eyes, trying to read whether her sister was pulling her tail or being serious.
“In any event,” Mudbriar began, “we might share some interests and personality quirks, but we’re two very different ponies, and we each have our strengths and our roles. For example, Maud has the skill and physique to break through almost any stone, while I’m more suited to the slow growth and analysis of bark.”
Pinkie smirked and cast glances at both of them. “Oh, okay,” she said wolfishly, “I’m picking up what you’re putting down. She totally pegs you, doesn’t she?”
“Sometimes he even cries when I do it,” her sister added.
“She doesn’t—! I don’t—!” Mudbriar’s eyes went wide even as his tone remained the same, struggling to recover from Pinkie’s accusation. He turned to face Maud.
“That is a blatant lie,” he protested. “Why do you insist on enabling her childish behaviour?”
“She’s my sister. That’s my job.” Maud cast him the slightest hint of a smile. “Besides, it doesn’t have to be a lie.”
Mudbriar’s face reddened at that, and he quickly faced Pinkie again. “Ahem,” he coughed, “in any event, any action on your part is not necessarily required, although if they permit it, you can serve as a witness and intermediary when they decide to resolve their aggravations.”
“And what does that mean in Ponish?” Pinkie asked plainly.
“You just need to let them talk it out,” Maud offered, “you can’t erase what already happened.”
“That’s it? Why is everyone saying they need to talk it out? Rainbow is terrible with her words, just mentioning what she said ticked Applejack off!”
“Because it’s the only option aside from couples counselling,” Maud said. “Just look at the rest of your friends. Are they getting involved?”
“Well, no, but—”
Maud put her hoof over Pinkie’s mouth. “No buts. You can’t control how they feel, only your own feelings.”
Mudbriar tilted his head. “I wonder if you can even control that.”
Maud shot him a deadly glare.
“B-but I’m sure you can,” he quickly added. “You just have to, uh…” his voice trailed off as he searched Maud’s face for an appropriate response. She rolled her eyes.
“You can focus on something else,” Maud suggested. “Like why you’re so invested in fixing this argument. Are you trying to run from something else? Anything to do with Cheese?”
“Huh? No,” Pinkie gave her sister a funny look. “I mean, Cheese is super cool and super fun to hang around, but he’s also travelling all over Equestria hosting all kinds of wild parties. He hasn’t really come back in a while.”
She cast her eyes down, continuing. “But this is about Applejack. I mean, isn’t it normal to want the best for your friend? With Granny Smith gone, I just feel like she needs some extra support in her life. And Rainbow Dash wasn’t even there to give it!”
“Then you’re not trying to fix their relationship for both of them.” Maud pointed out. “Just Applejack. It’s starting to sound like you don’t think Rainbow Dash is the best pony for her.”
“Well, not the way she is right now,” Pinkie said. “That’s why I gotta be there to make sure it goes well!”
“Interesting,” Mudbriar said, “so what kind of pony do you think is the best match for Applejack?”
“Figures I’d have to spell it out for you,” Pinkie groaned. “Applejack’s working full-time, plus she has her family to support. She needs some pony who’s super family-oriented and can understand the stress of taking care of others. They’d also have to be funny and lighthearted, so when she’s overworked she has someone to help take the load off. Oh! And energetic. I guess that’s one thing Rainbow has. Applejack loves sports and farmwork, so she needs someone with a lot of energy to match.”
“Mhm,” Mudbriar muttered, “I think you just described yourself.”
“What? Pfft!” Pinkie laughed and leaned on Maud. “You never told me he could tell jokes. Ha! Me? That’s totally nuts.”
But Maud simply blinked at her slowly. “He’s not wrong. You did.”
Pinkie’s eyes bulged, her face turning pale as her jaw dropped. It was only a split second before the look dropped from her face, but it had been there, clear as a polished diamond. Even Maud, who often had trouble reading other ponies, gave her sister a look that said she noticed.
Pinkie leaned forward, her face utterly petrified and her eyes burning like hot coals. “If anyone asks, you don’t say a word to them about this, okay? I need,” her voice trailed for a moment, “I need to think alone for a second.”
“Okay,” Maud assured her.
Pinkie nodded, and then pulled her hat down to cover her face. She had stored it in her cotton candy-like mane, in case of hat-related emergencies. This was one of them.
“I might’ve been a teacher at the School of Friendship, but it seemed even a teacher could get school sometimes. The trail was going cold, and my leads were giving me more questions than answers. I didn’t want to do it, but it looked like I was going to have to pull out the big guns. There was one other couple I knew who had succeeded in love, more than even Maud and that sorry sop Mudbriar. What was more, they were closer to my client. An attorney-at-love shouldn’t get too personal, but I was running out of options, and this couple was married. Sure, so was Mrs Cake, but she and her husband weren’t the spring chickens they used to be, and Applejack was going through a case of young love. I needed something fresh.”
“Pinkie, you’re narrating again,” Maud reminded her.
“Also, that was kind of rude,” Mudbriar added.
“Oh, put a stick in it,” she snapped back at him. “I have bigger pastries to worry about!”
“And just like that, I was back where it started: Sweet Apple Acres. The stench of fertiliser and livestock filled my nose, but they weren’t the only stink around. Underneath it all was the festering of a broken relationship, and maybe another relationship I hadn’t even considered before. I needed to get to the bottom of things before it was too late.”
“Uh, Pinkie?” Applebloom’s voice pulled the pink Pinkerton back to reality. “Everything okay? You’ve been starin’ at the farm for like, five minutes straight.”
“Five minutes is right, little filly,” Pinkie said, “but there’s nothing straight about what’s going down inside. Trust me, the less you know, the better.”
“Oh, okay, it’s one of those days,” Applebloom deflated, the will to inquire further suddenly drained out of her. “Just don’t break anything, and clean up the confetti when you’re done.”
“Wait, it’s not like that,” Pinkie said, catching up. “Do you know where Big Mac is? I just need to talk to him.”
The young mare’s ears perked up as she turned around. “About the shower?”
“Shower? Why? Something wrong with your plumbing?”
Applebloom blinked. “Nevermind, forget I said anything. But just don’t let Applejack see you, alright? She might start getting suspicious.”
Pinkie smiled, not sure what Applebloom was talking about, but glad to be on the same page. “Easy-peasy. So, you know where I can talk to Big Mac?”
“Out by our parents’ tree. He goes there to think.”
Pinkie thanked her and let Applebloom get back to her chores before turning for the unused orchard and taking off. Buttercup and Bright Mac’s tree. Technically trees, but the fusion of pear and apple had gone right down to the roots and were inseparable.
It was as good as any place to talk about love, Pinkie supposed, though the bittersweet thought of how their marriage divided the Pear family nibbled at the back of her mind. At least the tree, like Maud’s cavern, was in a place no one else could hear her if she started bawling again.
The tree had become something of a sacred space for the Apple family ever since Grand Pear rejoined them. At first unused, by now it had been the site of two marriages. The middle of the field would be trimmed and tended to every few months, keeping the weeds out and the clearing neat, but surrounding it were thick copses of wood that almost enshrined the fusion, making the journey to it feel like a true pilgrimage.
She found Big Mac sitting at the base of the tree, his head lowered and pressed against the stump. His lips were moving, but Pinkie couldn’t hear a single word. Seeing the big and mighty stallion bend his head over shocked Pinkie, though she didn’t know why. It’s not as if she had never seen him sad or worried, but this was different. This time, he looked weak.
She hadn’t seen that before. Big Mac had legs thicker than some trees and muscles that felt like forged iron. Applejack threw her strength around more often than her brother, but despite her bullheadedness, he was older, bigger, and had more years of fieldwork than she did.
Watching him closely from behind a tree, she had to congratulate Sugar Belle for her taste in stallions. The mare had picked him for his heart, of that Pinkie had no doubt. Big Mac was sweeter and more soft-spoken than most guys, and those were his best traits. Still, a wall of rippling muscle that could snap a tree full-grown in one kick must’ve been a bonus.
The sky reddened as the sun dipped below the trees. Pinkie waited until Big Mac’s lips stopped moving before slowly knocking on a tree trunk to get his attention.
“Applejack?” he muttered before he turned his head. “Oh, just you. What brings you out here, Pinkie?”
“You, actually. I wanted to ask you something.”
“Me?” He shrugged. “Dunno if I can answer. Never been a strong conversationalist.”
“Ah, that’s what makes you perfect, my friend,” Pinkie said. “You listen, and you think. So, think about this: Applejack and Rainbow Dash are fighting and it’s making their relationship tough. Think I should do something to help them resolve it?”
Big Mac hesitated for a moment. “Yup.”
Pinkie turned and stared right at him, shocked. “Wait, really?”
“Yup,” he nodded. “Applejack’s all work, she ain’t gonna give Rainbow the time of day to get into how she feels. How both of them feel, frankly. I seen ‘em fight like mad cats sometimes.”
“So what should I do?”
“Bring them together, lie if you have to, ‘cause right now they ain’t gonna be seeing each other if they can help it. Get ‘em together and get them talking, but step in ‘fore they start hissing.”
“That’s what Maud said I should do,” Pinkie nodded, “be a mediator or something. Is that enough? I mean, it feels like I’d be doing nothing. What if they say something really bad and I can’t stop them from arguing?”
“Then maybe they weren’t meant to be together,” Big Mac said. He scratched his chin. “Honestly, I can’t say for sure if I’m giving Rainbow a fair shot. She missed Granny Smith’s funeral, after all. Can’t pretend that doesn’t sting a fair bit.”
Pinkie put her hoof over her mouth as she just now realised that Big Mac must’ve had his own opinions about Rainbow as well. “Oh, gosh, I’m sorry Big Mac. Of course you’d be mad at her too. Who could blame you?”
But he shook his head. “I ain’t mad, ‘least I’m trying not to be. Don’t feel right being mad when I don’t know what Rainbow had going on. But I’d be lying if I said I don’t think Rainbow’s right for my sister. Luna knows their fighting keeps me up some nights, even if it’s just in my dreams.”
Pinkie nodded, understanding on some level how he felt. Her sister’s words rang in her mind, and she started to prod the waters.
“She says Rainbow makes her happy, and you know they’re good friends, so it’s hard to tell her that you think they might not work out when they have so much going for them.”
Big Mac simply nodded, and Pinkie continued. “But the more you think about it, the more you start to realise you might be seeing something that they don’t. And then you want to step in, but you’re afraid you’re letting your own protective feelings get in the way.”
“Yup,” he answered. “If I said anything she’d call me overprotective. But I’m her brother, and the older one at that. Feels like she forgets that I’m s’posed to be takin’ care of her.”
“So, let’s say I didn’t feel comfortable mediating for them to talk,” Pinkie began, “let’s say I’m afraid I might goof it up in my usual Pinkie fashion. Would you do it for me?”
Big Mac paused at that, and then looked to his parents’ tree. He hesitated a long while, long enough for the shadows to darken and the sky to shift from hues of red and pink to purple and orange.
“Don’t think I’d feel right about it. ‘Fraid I care more about Applejack than Dash, and I ain’t gonna be a fair judge to ‘em.”
“So, you wouldn’t do it because you love Applejack, right?”
He nodded. “Double yup.”
“Okay then,” Pinkie sighed, “well, then I’m going to have to tell you something else. I really want to fix my friends’ relationship and help them smile and laugh together again, but I think I might have a big problem.”
“Been frank with you this whole time,” Big Mac said, “I ain’t gonna judge. Whatever you gotta say, say it.”
“I really, and I mean really, want Applejack to have the best girlfriend she could possibly have. And I don’t want to sound too egotistical, but I think, just maybe…” Pinkie took a deep breath, giving herself a moment to read Big Mac’s face.
“I think that ideal girlfriend might be me,” she admitted. “More than that, now that I’m saying it out loud, I think I’m really hoping that it’s me.”
Big Mac blinked at her, not saying a word, not even breathing it seemed, for a very long thirty seconds. Slowly, he leaned back, finally seeming to take it all in.
“Oh,” he muttered. And then he exhaled. “I see.”
“Well, don’t just leave me on a cliffhanger,” Pinkie pleaded, “say something else. What do you think I should do?”
“Ah, sorry,” Big Mac rubbed the back of his neck, and then flashed her a nervous, goofy smile. “I was just thinkin’ that this might not be the best time to ask if you could plan a baby shower for Sugar Belle.”
Part 3: Night
Applejack bucked the tree. Hard.
The day was fading fast and it was difficult to see where the apples landed, but she heard them. She kicked the tree again. Something snapped, and it wasn’t her legs.
“Oh, for Celestia’s sake,” she muttered, feeling around the tree bark.
The orchards around the house were the oldest, its trees the thickest, and there was no way she could chop them down with any number of kicks. Not even Big Mac could make those ancient trees budge. Still, they were just trees, and she could feel where her hoof had cracked the outer layer of the tree’s bark, leaving an exposed wound for sap to leak from.
Applejack clenched her jaw. The gash wouldn’t kill the tree, not immediately anyway, but it was still sizable. But it was getting too dark to add a protective patch over it. With what little light was left, she did her best to brush off the loose bark and keep the wound clean. She made a mental note to wake up extra early to staple a patch on before going to work.
What are you doing, girl? Granny Smith’s voice rang in her head disapprovingly. A tree like that doesn’t deserve to be your kicking post.
“I know!” she answered back. “Just fussin’ is all.”
Fuss somewhere else, and on yer own time. Farm’s a place for proper work.
Applejack took the words in stride, hitching herself to the apple cart. She still didn’t see the need for registration, it wasn’t anything more than some pieces of wood on wheels, but at least that matter was done, and she could use it without the issue nibbling at the back of her mind.
“Sis! Sugar Belle’s got dinner ready!” Applebloom called from the house.
Applejack heaved a sigh of relief, the kind reserved for the end of a long day of work. “Celestia bless that mare,” she said. Sugar Belle joining the Apple family had been one of the best things to happen to them. Big Mac and Sugar Belle were both still young, and she was sad to admit that there was a bit of reservation when Big Mac proposed. Marriages weren’t always guaranteed to last, especially if they were rushed. But it had been six years since they married. Six blissful years.
Sugar Belle was a treat around the farm, and a better baker and cook than anyone else in the family, much as Applejack hated admitting it. The girl knew fritters and pies and crumbles like the back of her hoof. She could experiment with new tastes and prepare traditional recipes as well as any member of the Apple family.
What’s more, she made Big Mac smile like a big dumb oaf every single day. As his sister, that was all she could ask for.
Applejack pulled the cart into the barn and locked it up behind her before heading into the kitchen. The sweet sound of chatter told her that someone had brought a guest tonight.
Had better not be Applebloom. That was not Granny’s voice, she realised, but her own. Much like Babs, Applebloom was growing up to be a fine mare. And the frightening thing was, the colts around town thought so too. She wasn’t against letting her little sister play at dating, but she was just barely old enough to be called a mare. She still had a long way to go towards mastering alchemy and herbology, plus she was busy substituting at the School of Friendship. She wasn’t ready for dating.
Celestia willing, Applejack thought to herself, she won’t ever be.
You can’t chase them all off. Now Granny’s voice was in her head, loud as a school bell and twice as persistent.
“Already have, more’n once,” Applejack replied to herself. “And I aim to do so ‘till I find someone who deserves her.”
Please, if I could spit I would. That Tender Taps fellow was as sweet as any boy in Ponyville, and you know it. Yer just scared she’ll drift away, and that the farm will be short two Apples.
The truth stung, especially when she had to admit it to herself. But whether it was her own voice, or her thoughts filtered through her memory of Granny Smith, she couldn’t deny the power in them.
Well, whoever their guest was, there was no point dallying around. Sooner or later a rooster has to crow and you gotta voice the noise.
“Applejack!” Pinkie Pie waved to the tired mare as she came in and sat at the dinner table.
Despite working around baked goods her whole life, Pinkie Pie was still stunned by the selection Sugar Belle had laid out for dinner. Burger patties made from packed beans, carrots, grains and rhubarb for colour were stacked on a big plate in the centre of the table, free for all to take. Custom sauces—mixtures of stone-ground mustard, tangy ketchup, apple cider vinegar, and three varieties of chilli peppers—accompanied the burgers like a rainbow of condiments.
And that was just the main course. Sugar Belle had prepared vanilla meringue pie with cinnamon, ice cream on sweet glutinous rice cakes, and a honey and chocolate whiskey mousse, boldly placing them right next to the lettuce and buns, knowing full well Pinkie and Applebloom were more likely to grab dessert before the meal.
Applejack hovered at the door, eyes focused more on Pinkie than the dinner before her.
“Howdy,” Applejack said, “didn’t think I’d see you again today. Figured you were busy with whatever it was that you were up to.”
“I had some time to think about it,” Pinkie replied, “and I don’t think I’m going to do what I thought I was going to do.”
“Huh, that so? You’re a lot of things, but a quitter ain’t one of ‘em.” Applejack washed her hands at the sink and sat down, filling her plate with two burgers and a slice of pie.
“I ain’t quitting,” Pinkie replied mockingly. “You could say I had a shift of perspective.”
Applejack let out a heavy sigh. “Well, you won’t hear a complaint from me.”
“Mm!” Pinkie’s eyes widened as she took a bite of the mousse. “Sugar Belle, you’ve gotta give me the recipe for this! It’s like nothing I’ve ever tasted before, and I’ve tried everything on Mrs Cake’s menu.”
“Well, a mare has to keep some secrets, right?” Sugar Belle giggled, a tinkling sound that was as delicate as a bell’s ring, as she spread mustard on her burger.
Pinkie had seen her with Big Mac many times, but only now did she take a closer look at how they looked together. Sugar Belle had a round, soft face. She was a natural beauty, though there was a slightly darker shade of purple around her eyes where she had applied a light coat of eyeshadow.
And, over the years of living on the farm, Pinkie noticed for the first time that Sugar Belle had become a lot more toned than when they first met. She was still far from Applejack, or even Applebloom for that matter, but for a unicorn, her legs had developed impressively. Pinkie didn’t doubt that she had no trouble kneading dough for hours with that kind of muscle definition.
“So, what did you see at the appliance shop?” Applejack asked Applebloom, who was face-deep into her third burger already.
Applebloom wiped her mouth on her leg, though switched to a napkin when Applejack shot her a stern look.
“Whirlpool had a few that’ll fit in the kitchen,” she said, “they’re all about six hundred bits, plus another four hundred for installation.”
“Oh? What’re you getting?” Pinkie asked.
“Dishwasher,” Applebloom answered. “It’s about time we upgraded.”
“But that’s a thousand bits for one machine,” Applejack tapped her chin. “I know setting up a new washer’s more work, but does installation have to cost that much?
“I think it’s worth it,” Pinkie suggested, quickly pulling out a pen and paper from her mane and scribbling down an address. “I can recommend you the stallion who repaired Mrs Cake’s dishwasher. He does replacements and installations too, but at a better rate. Two hundred and fifty bits.”
“Almost half,” Applejack whistled, taking Pinkie’s note and tucking it under her hat. “Suppose it couldn’t hurt to check him out. Thanks, Pinkie.”
“Don’t mention it,” Pinkie waved, “that’s just what I do.”
And suddenly, she felt a shot of discomfort hit her chest. It took a moment to register the sensation, but it came just as Applejack looked at her. There was thankfulness in her grin, but beneath it, Pinkie sensed something else. It was in her eyes.
Pinkie knew Applejack was still on guard from earlier that day. Their last conversation ended awkwardly and with slammed doors. Even so, her worries quickly faded as new feelings took hold.
Her face reddened and she was thankful that her pink coat would hide it, for it felt as if Applejack was eyeing every corner of her body, checking for nervous tics or tells that might catch her in a lie.
Worse, Pinkie Pie started to consider for a moment whether Applejack was just checking her out. Without meaning to, Pinkie ran her hooves over her mane, trying to smooth it out a bit.
She didn’t want to believe it, or rather she wasn’t prepared for what would happen if that really was the case. But Applejack wouldn’t hide behind prying a prying look. She was honest to a fault. If she thought it, she would have said it, just as she had so quickly asked Rainbow out on a date.
Pinkie bit into her burger. In any case, it was time for the love doctor to make a decision.
“Soooo,” Pinkie said with an exaggerated stretch. “Uh, how was your day, Applejack?”
Applejack’s face soured, and the memory of her arguing with Rainbow at the funeral flashed into Pinkie’s mind. For a moment, she looked the same as she did then.
“Busy,” Applejack said, relaxing. “Think things are starting to settle down, getting one thing done after another. Work at the school’s been hard to keep up with ‘till now, but with summer break coming up in a month I s’pose that ain’t something to worry about.”
“I was hoping to teach over summer,” Applebloom chimed in. “I’ve been brewing potions and cures for years now with Zecora. Ain’t a master yet, but she says I’m as good as most professional wizards.” She glanced to her sister, then her brother.
“Would like to do more’n just spend time on the farm,” she added. “That okay with y’all?”
Big Mac shrugged. “Yup.”
The buckball moved to Applejack’s side of the field, and Pinkie watched intensely, wondering if she should say anything to cut the tension between sisters.
She didn’t need to. “Yup,” Applejack mimicked, following Big Mac’s lead.
Applebloom’s mouth hung open as if she had been prepared to counter a different answer. Instead, she returned to eating her pie.
Hungry silence lingered for a moment while everyone filled up. They had managed to stave themselves off with conversation, but even Pinkie found herself swept up by Sugar Belle’s cooking for a time.
Eventually, her bites slowed as her belly filled. Pinkie looked back up to Applejack. “Sooo,” she said again, “I guess you didn’t see Rainbow Dash today, did you?”
“And I guess you ain’t dropping the issue like you said.” The words stung, even if the realisation on Applejack’s face told Pinkie that she hadn’t meant to snap so fiercely.
“Sorry, I—” Applejack started, but to both their surprise, it was Big Mac who cut her off.
“Sorry’s right,” he said, “where do you get off thinking you can talk to your friend like that?”
She glared back at her brother. “You mind your own business, Big Macintosh. Sit this one out.”
“Don’t think I will,” Big Mac rumbled, pressing his hoof on the table. It was only a small gesture, but his strength tipped it anyway. “She’s my guest, and how you treat her is my business. Just so happens she was helping me and Sugar Belle with something.”
Applejack gaped, looking at her brother and then Sugar Belle, and finally Pinkie. “I-I din’t mean to,” she began, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. She looked down as she faced Pinkie. “Mighty sorry for that, sugarcube. It ain’t yer fault I’ve been stressed, an’ I shouldn’t’ve taken it out on you.”
Pinkie fought back the urge to hug her and caress her cheek. The Apples all had the habit of moving deeper into their rural accent whenever they had too much to think about. But with Applejack, it was just adorable to see that even a mare who looked like the physical embodiment of strength could be that vulnerable.
“It’s okay,” Pinkie said, wiping a blurring tear from her eye. She would have continued, were it not for the haggard look she saw on Applejack’s face.
“Nah,” said the farm girl, teetering in her seat. “Wan’t fair for me tuh—”
Pinkie was out of her seat the next moment, catching Applejack as she collapsed from exhaustion.
Applejack woke to the light of a candle, pressure pounding from inside her head. She was lying in her own bed with the covers pulled over her. It was nearly summer but the nights could still send a shiver. The candle must’ve been on her nightstand. A strange thing, considering she already had a lamp.
Shoot. Did I forget to pay the electric bill?
She reached out to see if the light would turn on, but her hoof met empty air. When she felt the edge of her nightstand, she tried sensing with touch what her clouded vision could not. Someone else’s hoof pushed her back into bed.
“Who?” She strained her eyes, thinking it was Sugar Belle for a moment. Then the memory of yelling at Big Mac charged full force into her mind. She had gotten fussy over Pinkie’s questioning and threw a fit at dinner.
Luna, say it ain’t so, she thought to herself. Gotta be a dream. That wan’t me. But it was, she knew it as sure as she knew that the pony sitting at the edge of her bed wasn’t Sugar Belle.
“Easy there, tough girl,” Pinkie said, slowing her when she attempted to rise. “Applebloom was about to call a doctor over to take a look at you if you took any longer. Looks like you just tired yourself out.”
Applejack was in disbelief that Pinkie could still shine a smile on her so easily. She saw the joy in nearly everything, and at that moment seemed brighter than the candle.
“Don’t deserve you,” Applejack blurted out. “You were just tryin’ to help, I’ve been lettin’ Dash get to my head so much that I couldn’t even think straight.”
Again, Pinkie surprised her. “Well, I don’t think you were thinking straight to begin with.” Showing a bit of care and friendship was one thing, but Applejack wasn’t even in the right mind to come up with any jokes. It caught her off guard and couldn’t help herself when she laughed.
“Can’t believe you,” she said, forcing herself up with her back to her pillow, “still cheery as ever. Hope that means you’ll forgive me if I haven’t been fair to you.”
“No, I wasn’t being fair to you either,” Pinkie said, her puffy hair deflating with the mood. “I know dealing with Rainbow has been hard on you. It’s just that,” she hesitated and drew a deep breath, “she’s making you unhappy and you already have so much to take care of. I really care about you, so I thought I could help by figuring out what kind of big, romantic gesture she could do to make things right.”
“What changed your mind?”
“Every pony else,” Pinkie answered. “Mrs Cake, Maud, they both said you two need to talk it out. And if Rainbow’s not right for you, then that’s that.”
Applejack sighed. Those last words struck a chord in her like a maestro with a fiddle. Not unlike Rainbow. Her girlfriend was a big, flying bag of contradictions, loyal down to every cell in her body and a hard worker too, except she could be clueless with showing what her loyalty meant and had a habit of only putting in work into things she cared about.
It didn’t help that she had an athletic body that kings would have waged wars over. Applejack could excuse a lot just for the privilege of holding onto every curve on Rainbow’s body. Wonderbolts had strict requirements for their physique, and Rainbow was an ideal. Her figure was slender enough to ignore drag, but her back was toned beyond belief from daily flight routines, to say nothing of the endurance that also came with those exercises.
But when the things she cared about didn’t seem to include their relationship, none of that mattered. She made Applejack feel worthless.
She bit her lip, her eyes blurring again as they reddened and moistened. She finally blinked, then nodded, stuttering, “S-s’pose that’s true.”
“You okay?” Pinkie placed her hoof on Applejack’s cheek.
Celestia help me, she even smells sweet. Applejack leaned into the caress as she took a deep breath. “Like cotton candy and apple pie.”
Suddenly Pinkie’s hoof retreated, and when Applejack opened her eyes she could’ve sworn she looked pinker than usual. “What is it?” she asked her, scanning her wide eyes. It took a moment for Applejack to realise the words she had said in her head were not, in fact, just in her head.
“Oh gosh,” she scrambled, embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to. Probably sounds bad, doesn’t it? And I know you and that Cheese Sandwich pony have been gettin’ on, I shouldn’t have, ah…” Applejack searched for more words, but none came.
Instead, Pinkie leaned forward, filling the air with her sweet candy scent as their lips pressed together. Stunned, Applejack thought the kiss felt like it might take her breath away if she wasn’t careful. She tried pulling off, but her hooves moved of their own accord and wrapped around Pinkie, pulling her down on top of her.
What are you doing? Her thoughts desperately rang. If you don’t get a grip, you’re gonna lose it all.
She started to twist, to find a way out of the embrace they had locked each other in, but Pinkie had other plans, turning with her and pinning her down with all her weight.
Applejack gasped as Pinkie’s lips nibbled at her ear, running down the full length of the sensitive skin before puckering at her neck.
Sorry about this.
Their weight tipped over to one side, and with barely any effort, Applejack managed to spin them around in bed, putting Pinkie on her back. She had intended to jump off at that moment, but she hesitated, catching the white flash of Pinkie’s inviting smile. Her expectant eyes only worked to draw Applejack in, and despite the voice in her head, they succeeded. She wrapped Pinkie in her powerful legs and spun her onto her belly.
At any point, she could have stopped. Applejack knew this as she pressed her face into Pinkie’s sweet-scented hair. She could have apologised and stopped biting the back of her neck. Instead, she snaked her way down Pinkie’s spine to the base of her back.
You can stop if you want. The voice in her head was still there, but it had faded away to less than a mouse’s whisper. And in any case, Applejack wasn’t listening. She made up for her lack of preparation with energy and passion, tossing Pinkie around while they tugged at the sheets.
For Pinkie’s part, she had let Applejack set the pace for a time, but soon enough she started moving with abandon. Years of juggling and dancing and jumping through hoops for parties had made her more nimble than Applejack realised, twisting the two of them into positions no sane pony could have thought possible.
And when they tired, it all came down to kissing. Applejack breathed deeply as her tongue slid past Pinkie’s and they applied stronger and steadier pressure. A familiar sensation overwhelmed her as she felt a nibble at her lip, though this time it was Pinkie doing the biting. They both tightened, Applejack pulling Pinkie’s body against hers while Pinkie cradled Applejack’s head, making her feel more wanted than she had in months.
Eventually, though not until a long while later, they both gasped for air and collapsed, panting hard but satisfied and smiling.
They slept for a time, but Applejack woke to find Pinkie caressing her again, touching her in the most sensitive parts of her back and belly.
She groaned into the pillows.
Be honest with yourself. Applejack heard her inner voice, but could only smile as the next thoughts flooded in. What was that just now?
She made her move and kissed Pinkie again, and for a moment they found their second wind, with Applejack climbing on top of Pinkie this time and adding her own strength into her kiss.
The pink party pony slept deeply after that. But not Applejack. She lay awake through the remainder of the night until the cold light of dawn painted a faint purple over the star-speckled sky.
The truth was difficult, especially when you were saying it to yourself, and more often than not you were apt to fill your head with half-truths until you believed them.
She knew she had wanted everything that happened. Sure as the night, she needed it. Practically begged for it, even. But that was a half-truth, as well. Because there was another side to that feeling.
And she felt that side of her thoughts rise to the surface when a knock came from her window. She turned to it and lay frozen with fear.
Rainbow Dash was hovering outside her room.
Part 4: Truth
The sound of crashing startled Pinkie awake.
She stared blankly at the scene before her, blankets and pillows scattered around the floor, covered in blue feathers. There was a loud droning noise in her ears, but she hadn’t fully woken up to process any of it, not until a lamp came crashing over her head.
“I cannot believe you!” Rainbow Dash shouted, though not at her, it seemed. Pinkie turned and saw Applejack standing by the bed, clutching a pillow like a shield.
“I know I ain’t got an excuse but you need to calm down!”
“Calm? You expect me to be calm?” Pinkie blinked and rubbed the crust from her eyes. Her vision must’ve been playing tricks on her, because when tears started streaking down Rainbow’s face, she could have sworn she noticed traces of mascara running down with them.
“You did even say it to my face.” Rainbow kicked the wall, sending a shudder through the house. “You had to go behind my back to rip out my heart!”
“Sugarcube—” Applejack began, but was cut off when a bouquet of roses flew over her head.
Pinkie expected the assault to continue, but instead, Rainbow fell to her knees and started sobbing, beating her own head with her hoof.
“I know I’m not the best girlfriend,” she cried into the floor, “but was it this bad? Did you have to go and… with her?” Rainbow wiped her face clean and shot a look at Pinkie.
She felt like Rainbow was trying to murder her with thoughts alone. Perhaps if Rainbow had been a unicorn, there would’ve been a smoking crater formerly known as Pinkie Pie.
There was only one way out.
“Don’t blame her,” she told Rainbow. “It was all me. AJ was overworked and passed out from exhaustion. She wasn’t thinking straight when we, uh, started doing stuff.”
“Pinkie, no,” Applejack said immediately. “I ain’t letting you lie for me. Last night wasn’t an accident, and it wan’t no mistake either.”
She turned to Rainbow Dash. “But it’s the honest truth that we didn’t mean to hurt you. But when you didn’t come to Granny Smith’s funeral, well, I guess it brought up all kinds of feelings.”
“Like what?” Rainbow asked, venom still in her tone.
“Like how yer always too busy for me, even when I go to all yer shows and ask you out to dinner. I’m always putting in the work, and sometimes I wonder if I’m even that important to you. And not showing up to the one time I needed you just made me feel unwanted.”
Applejack looked over to Pinkie. “But last night, I forgot about all that. Pinkie made me feel desired. And I don’t regret it, because I really needed it.”
The words made Pinkie’s chest swell with pride, even if they also darkened the already sullen eyes on Rainbow.
The pegasus closed her eyes and breathed a deep sigh. “Honest? I made you feel that way?”
Applejack nodded without hesitation.
“Well, I guess that’s it, then,” Rainbow said, but not without choking on her words.
“No, it’s not,” Pinkie said.
Both looked at her.
“The only thing that’s clear to me is that it’s complicated,” she continued. “We’re all part of the Elements of Harmony, but not because we have some magical destiny that means we’re meant to be together forever. It’s because we worked at it, right?”
Pinkie looked Rainbow Dash in the eye. “You love Applejack, don’t you?”
She nodded back. “Yeah.”
“Well, so do I,” Pinkie said. “And I think both of us are willing to do or say anything to get what we want.” Then she looked at Applejack. “But if you knew you could have a perfect relationship, and all you had to do was choose one of us, could you?”
Applejack hesitated, her jaw hanging open silently until she simply shook her head.
Pinkie nodded, expecting her answer. “I thought I could be the impartial third party to fix all this, but it turns out, I’m just as messed up. It’s my fault for rushing things, I thought I could be a real attorney-at-love. But now that our feelings are all on the table, maybe it’s time we took them to someone else to help us out.”
“What, like a relationship counsellor?” Rainbow asked. She looked at Applejack. “And, that means you and I…” Her voice faded, not daring to even have hope.
“I ain’t opposed to that,” Applejack said quietly. “Don’t like the idea of cutting you out of my life just yet.”
“Okay, perfect,” Pinkie released a hefty sigh of relief. “Because this whole thing needs to be dealt with away from the farm. It’s totally going to ruin the mood for Sugar Belle’s baby shower.”
Applejack nodded as if in agreement. “Reckon it would.” And she froze. “Hold up one apple-picking minute. Did you just say what I think you said?” She shot Rainbow Dash a look of disbelief.
“Tell me I didn’t just hear those words,” she said. But Rainbow stood stiff, equally stunned by the news.
Applejack’s eyes widened, only just now realising what Big Mac had meant during dinner about Pinkie Pie helping them. And he din’t even tell me himself.
Suddenly, all other thoughts drained from her mind. “BIG MACINTOSH!” Pinkie watched her storm out of her bedroom with bloody murder in her eyes. “Why in Celestia’s name am I just hearing ‘bout this now?”
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- The Dinfield · 1.2k words · 19 0 · 870 views
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Congrats on the cover image for making me sad and hungry simultaniously.
11248906
Thanks. It's a temporary image though until I find time to draw one. Just needed something so it would look complete before submitting.
There better be another chapter coming
😂 like Pinkie, I find this whole story very fun to read. Maybe we can have a "choose your own ending" type of story, yes? no?
🥺
Thanks for sharing this story with us. The sad theme really nailed in the concept of realistic relationship problems.
The way you wrote the three characters involved makes me wish there's more to read.
11250149
Thank you. Aside from mystery, romance and shipping is the genre I have the least experience with. I'm much more of a sci-fi/fantasy adventure junkie. So I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
11250339
You wrote well though!!!
Of course I enjoyed reading it 💙💙💙
aww, life was a lot less complicated in Season 1!
this was a nice touch, and reminds me of me
gotta admit im a bit surprised the Babs we see in the canon grew up to be into Rarity levels of makeup
aww, yeah, with the rest of her family having those they are "closer to" now than to her. another sad change that can come with adulthood
oof, and Rainbow Dash was prominent in her absence in the scene before. this is a moment that is sadly true to Rainbow Dash's flaws, coming together to result in something that would hurt any romantic partner
oof, and that does bridge the gap between the AppleDash of canon and the future ApplePie. there's something refreshingly classic about this i am digging, it feels like an homage to shipfics past that got past the inconvenient canon ship by revealing that it's covering up deeper unresolved conflicts that come to a head
aww, and a very fitting lesson for the older Pinkie to have learned
hehe, always good to have a Pinkie Pie alliteration
ah, i see this fic is going for a realistic interpretation of Pinkie's object-summoning canon powers
that brings to mind the joke that their elements should have been switched, haha
aww, that is such good advice! more like Pinkie Therapist
hehe, love this
references!
hehe, i like this bit
oof, that's a long walk!
ah nice, Pinkie's powers of subconsciously knowing everything that's happening in the plot
well that makes me glad that pony diabetes isn't real probably
yeah i gotta say i am on Applejack's side here in the indignation
aww, Pinkie's mane is straightened out now!
yeah, i would, too. not the time, Mudbriar!
well this came out of left field, and was very weird!
hehe, that is indeed what she did
i do enjoy this running gag! i am a sucker for the wacky character narrating in a way everyone in the story can hear thing
yeah, that is a lot!
aww, it is nice that Granny Smith's voice is still alive in Applejack's head :)
yes, love the worldbuilding that explains away any pony food that looks non-vegetarian
oof, now that is a good Applejack snap, could totally see it
classic! really takes the air out of the scene
this really seems like an abrupt ending! i'm guessing it was because you ran out of time to write? very understandable if so, the 12kw this ran to was already quite a lot!
there were a lot of great parts to this, with Pinkie being Pinkie and all the little gags about how she interacts with others being very clever and fun. and the relationship conflict between Applejack and Rainbow Dash was a great one. the thoughtlessness and lack of organization on Rainbow Dash's part causing her to miss Granny Smith's funeral is a solid inciting incident, and their mutual resentment over these little things they let fester due to not communicating about them was very on-point.
but the silly Pinkie antics and just how immature all three mares are for their age clashes with the grounded, serious conversations with Maud and Big Mac, because the latter point to there being a genuine and healthy connection between Pinkie and Applejack that develops, as well as character growth for Pinkie, neither of which happens. if it was always meant to be a series of disasters, then i think the story would have been stronger without their sections. still, it was an enjoyable ride, and disaster ApplePie tastes just as good. thanks for it!
11277352
Hey! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I actually had more than enough time to extend the story but chose not to for editing's sake, and because at my core, I'm not a shipping/romance writer, and writing endings for something you suck at is hard. But I'm glad you enjoyed the ride anyhow.