If you've stuck with me this far on this story, then I have one thing I would very much like to say to you: Thank you!
This has been an incredible experience for me. So many people have been incredibly supportive, in private messages and in the comments.
Once again, I would like to thank Easteu for the incredible cover art for this. I'm not kidding when I say that getting that picture was one of the most wonderful things I'd ever received. I have that up on my PC as my desktop wallpaper right now, as I write this!
So, here is where I will try to answer some questions, and go into details on the process that brought Sunflower to life.
Just a word of warning, there's a lot of "behind the scenes" stuff here. Hopefully, it won't alter your perspective on the story itself, but some of my early ideas were terrible, comical or just very different than the final version.
Project: Sunflower, how it began:
After my unexpected success with Interview with a Princess, I wanted to write a new story with some actual substance. Interview, as fun as that was, was more or less a fluff piece that I knocked out in about two weeks, all told.
So, I sat down and thought about what kinds of stories I liked. And I realized that I really liked stories that had humans interacting with ponies.
A few things came together all at once at about this time. I was going through my old stories that I had started writing when I was a teenager, and found the first appearance of what would later become the Black Tide. I also saw my first summary of The Conversion Bureau on EQD, though I didn't read it at that time. The thought of "ponification" seemed compelling to me, and I realized that I wanted to write a story where a human had a valid reason to become a pony.
The third thing that happened, and that made everything start to gel, was GeneralZoi's pony creator. I was playing around with it, making OC's, and I happened to make one with a light brown coat and auburn mane. She was a blank flank, though, and I thought about what would look good for a cutie mark. I did some internet searching, stumbled across a sunflower... and Sunflower the OC was born.
That's where everything kind of went "click". I took my old idea of a world-ending threat, the idea of ponification which I'd blatantly stolen from the TCB setting (though I did change it a little) and then I co-opted another old idea I'd had of making portals to various worlds.
Then came the planning stages. You would not believe some of the stuff that ended up on the cutting room floor. Most of this was during the initial planning stages, before I put down even one word of story.
One thing I wanted to mention, I've seen some comments about my knock against TCB stories in one of the later chapters. I really hope I didn't offend anyone. I'm a fan of the TCB setting (I really like the idea of an actual reason to 'ponify'), though some of those stories are disturbingly misanthropic. I just couldn't resist a quick dig, given the similarities between that setting and mine.
What's next? Sunflower: Side Projects and sequel
There will be a full-blown sequel to Project: Sunflower some time in the future. I want to write on some other projects, for a while, to clear away some of these ideas I've had kicking around in my head, plus I have a couple of other big projects I've been aching to get started on.
To keep my hand in, and keep this particular world fresh, I'll be writing Sunflower: Side Projects, which is intended to be a collection of one-shot side stories, based on this setting. Side Projects will fill in some of the gaps in this story, as well as bridging the gaps between Project: Sunflower and the still-untitled sequel.
Also, one of my thoughts on writing this was that this could be a somewhat open setting for other authors. Between Harmonics and Ascent, we have multiple possible worlds, as well as the ability to change into ponies, or whatever other form you wish.
So, I'll leave the setting completely open. My only request is that nobody else writes Erin as a character. Refer to her in your stories, yes, but please don't have her as a character in your actual story. It would feel really weird to have Erin running around in someone else's work.
Other OC's are fine, and don't worry too much about keeping 'canon'. Just have fun with the setting. And, if you do write a story based on this setting, consider adding it to the Project Harmonics group, to keep them collected.
Equestria-side antagonist
One of the things I realized right away was, as big of a threat that the Black Tide was in the story, the Tide itself was... boring. I needed an antagonist in Equestria to spice things up, make things interesting. Otherwise, it would have been chapter after chapter of "oh, no! The Earth is being destroyed and we can't stop it!" style angst.
Malachite wasn't my original antagonist on the Equestrian side. During my early planning stages, it was going to be the Fae Queen, an analogue of the old faerie legends, and not the nice Disney ones. Think the Brothers Grimm. This was going to be a serious threat, deadly and vicious.
The Fae Queen and her subjects had been locked away ages ago by Luna and Celestia, into a small pocket dimension. Humanity's continuing forays into Equestria would have weakened the dimensional walls of the prison, and allowed her to escape.
I decided that I didn't like that. I think the main reason I didn't like it was because Terry Pratchett had already done a much better job with that story in Lords and Ladies. Once I realized that the Fae Queen was essentially the same villain on hooves, I decided to ditch the concept.
A while later, Queen Chrysalis of the changelings showed up in the show, and I was really glad I had changed it! Far too similar for my tastes.
My next idea was a creature called Hive. It wasn't much, simply an eldritch abomination type critter sealed into a cave ages ago by Celestia. I didn't like the idea much, because it was a very two-dimensional character. It was evil for the sake of being evil, which I've always disliked. Why did Celestia seal it in a cave? How come it couldn't get out? How could I make it interesting?
There was only one thing about my concept of the Hive that I liked, and that was its ability to possess technology. I toyed with the idea of that being why Equestria's technology was so lagging: Anything that Hive could possess was forbidden tech. Contact with the Earth turned our world into a candyland for the Hive.
Hive lasted for about two days, with me sketching up ideas and discarding them, completely unsatisfied. I simply couldn't make it interesting! So, I abandoned the concept of an Equestrian antagonist with reluctance.
Malachite appeared in a flash of inspiration at about that time. So many things just came together all of a sudden. The concept of otherworldly faeries and a hivelike creature all came together, and I realized that it was a pony, a former student of Celestia, who was going to be the antagonist of the Equestrian side of things. I didn't plan it. Malachite sprung into my mind, almost completely formed, just needing a few details fleshed out.
As soon as I had his bio done, so many parts of the story just fell into place. That bio was later fleshed out to be the side-story "Death is not for me".
I'd like to take credit for creating him, but honestly, there was no planning involved. He just showed up one day and introduced himself.
Wait, wait... No Malachite? Then what was the original ending?
Well... before humanity's time ran out, and before the mass exodus begun, Harmony was discovered. A new, uninhabited planet that humans could move into en masse, without displacing any ponies. And, what's more, it had magic so ponies could live there too. And there was Ascent, so humans could become ponies, and ponies could become human. For absolutely no reason, really.
I'm really glad I didn't go with it, though I kept the concept of Harmony (which will feature largely in the sequel). Going with that ending would have just been like, "Oh, all those struggles you went through? Yeah, those were pointless. Here, have a pristine new world just handed to you."
As soon as I thought of Malachite, I knew how this story would end. As did many of you. I have to confess, the urge to alter my ending (changing it specifically to something that wasn't mentioned in the comments) was very high. In the end, though, I kept the ending that was originally in my mind, once I discovered Malachite.
It just felt right. And the other ideas I had were... kind of silly.
What are some other things that didn't make it into the story?
Romantic sub plots, and the sleeziest pony you know:
Erin was going to be in the middle of an unwanted love triangle between Big Mac and Lucky. Actually, she wasn't even going to be aware that she was in a love triangle, until Quick Sale (remember him?) got a little bit too pushy, and Big Mac and Lucky stepped in to put him in his place.
I pulled the part with Quick Sale, because I realized that I hated the "big guys step in to save the little girl from the bad guy" thing. It wasn't fair to Erin, who could take care of herself and hardly needed rescuing.
Then I realized the romantic sub-plot was dragging the story down, so I axed the whole thing. This was one of the few things I changed while actually writing. There were some pretty sweet scenes with a shy Big Mac trying to talk with Erin, and failing miserably. I honestly felt bad for what I was going to do to the poor guy!
Oh, well. That's what Side Projects is for, right?
Erin the hero:
I knew I wanted Erin to be a hero to Ponyville at one point. My first thought was that she rescued the Cutie Mark Crusaders from the Everfree, where they had gotten lost. But, nah, that was too boring, and pretty cliche.
Before I even started writing, I briefly considered an arc where the CMC got kidnapped by Paul Velchiek, because he was frustrated about not knowing how magic worked and they presented one of each type of pony as a research subject. Erin would have rescued them and brought them back to Equestria, simultaneously outing herself and becoming a hero.
That was on my mind for about half a day, which is honestly a lot longer than it deserved. It crossed the line between "this guy did a bad thing" and straight into "people are bastards" territory, because I realized that Paul couldn't have done this on his own. He would have needed the help of quite a few people. And it changed him from a guy who thought he was doing good things to save the Earth, and straight into cartoon villainy territory.
Honestly, I might as well have given him a white cat to pet while he laughed sinisterly at the Erin's attempts to thwart his plans.
I decided on the scene with the chimera, which I really like, and was very excited to finally write. Because Erin does some good things there, some brave things, but she doesn't save the day by herself. No, she needs the help of her friends, which reinforces the whole point of the show. And, also, it showed that the ponies, while being colorful, soft, and friendly, could also kick major butt when needed.
The Many Lives of Major Morris.
Major Morris was originally going to be a lot more interesting. He was originally going to be Erin's backup in "Ponyworld", having been ponified himself, and ready to rush in if she needed a rescue. he was also going to be a potential romantic interest, before I decided that, nope, he was married with kids.
That was axed because I wanted to focus on Erin's interactions with the ponies, and having a second human there would have been a distraction. Also, what does it mean that he'd be her backup? What, he'd just hang around outside Ponyville for weeks?
Major Morris's very existence was an attempt on my part to counter the idea that crops up a lot in fiction I've read that military people are these thuggish neanderthals who blindly follow orders without a conscience. His final backstory has him with dual masters degrees, married, and a father of two.
His working against Paul Velchiek when his ethical violations were discovered is the result of that. I can't imagine many people, military or not, being cool with remote-injecting mood altering drugs into unsuspecting volunteers. I imagine the very thought of it enraged him and made him feel physically ill.
Q&A time! And I'll start with the big one, first.
What the heck was the Black Tide?!
This goes way back, for me. A long, long time ago, I was trying to write a sci-fi story, where the Earth was being consumed by this thing called the Black Tide. Humanity was going to escape the planet using Ark ships, gigantic self-sustaining ships that went off into space and... Well, I have no idea what was going to happen then. I stopped writing it there because I had no plan and I'm no good at sci-fi.
Keep in mind, there's a chance that I may change the origin of the Black Tide. Everything you see here was the back-story for my untitled and abandoned pony-less sci-fi story I was writing in High School. I may decide later on to change it, and that will be the new 'canon' for this story.
In my original back-story for the Tide, it was basically this:
There was once an alien race, now long since extinct, that had a peculiar way of making uninhabitable planets habitable. They would drop this biomass, along with programmed biological control nodules, onto a planet, and then just leave.
The nanomachines would then go out and reform the planet, first by creating an artificial organic "computer" layer, and then forming a crust on top for the aliens to live on. Then the nanomachines would turn themselves off, keeping themselves in reserve for when the computer layer needed a repair.
The planet-wide computer would then be used by the aliens to help control the weather, share information, etc.
The problem was, the aliens died off, and left some of their computer worlds running. At one point, one of these worlds was damaged, possibly due to an asteroid strike, and a "repair nodule" went zipping off into space and crashed on Earth.
The repair nodule by itself was kind of dumb. It knew that there was supposed to be a layer of biological computer material where it was, so it instructed its tiny little nanobots to go out and make the computer out of whatever they could find. The result was the Black Tide, essentially a vast, unprogrammed, alien biological computer with no off switch, that simply devoured everything that it came into contact with.
It's not really spelled out explicitly in Project: Sunflower, but the Black Tide was slowly learning, programming itself from information around it. If it had been the aliens who had put it here, it would have been created with programming already in place, but the Tide had to learn on its own.
Unfortunately, it had no compassion for life, and simply sought to expand its own existence, as per the instructions from the repair nodule (the "twisted mass of cells" that Malachite found).
That's what happened to Malachite. The Tide found his consciousness floating within its own, and decided to integrate his information with its own. Unfortunately, that had the side effect of basically killing poor Malachite.
Questions and Answers:
Question from Celestia's Paladin: "I think the question is not what the Black Tide is, but more of where did it come from, who made it, and what is it's relation to the Fae Sprite."
Originally, there was no connection between the sprites and the Tide. The Tide, by examining Malachite's mind and his memories, discovered that the sprites could be used to possess people, wasn't limited to the space that the Tide currently was located in, and could be used to catalog all sorts of data, straight out of people's minds.
So, it simply took them. And the sprites, tired of being held back by Malachite and enticed by the much greater mental presence of the Tide, went willingly to their new master. If the Elements hadn't been used when they had been, things would have been very bad
Question from Gluestick: "In actual questions, He's def gonna be making appearances again, yessss?"
Sort of. Prince Verdant, in a way, could be considered Malachite's son. But, as Celestia considers herself his mother... Best not to suggest that around her!
Also, I'm playing with the thought of expanding on "Death is not for me", and making that a longer and more detailed stand-alone story.
Question from notMurphy: "When in the MLP timeline does Project: Sunflower start?"
Good question. After Discord, definitely. When I started writing, I had no idea about The Royal Wedding, Shining Armor and Cadence. Which is why I opted not to include them, when I first heard of them. Then I started realizing how silly that was. I'd need to get them into the story eventually!
But, "officially", this story starts several months after the wedding. I'll need to go back to earlier chapters and see if I need to do any revisions or alterations on the story to keep in line with that.
Question from Pen Brush: "why is machite a green alicorn why not a different color"
In his original life, he was born a green pony. His family, who had a mineral-theme going on with their names, named him Malachite. When he created his new body, he stuck with the green, because that was his original color.
Questions from Dogman15:
"what are Queen Chrysalis and her Changelings doing right now, since they have to exist somewhere?"
Plotting. Planning. Paying very close attention to this whole new non-magical world, and mildly frustrated at the thought that their changeling magic may not work there.
Please, nobody mention the magic-storing torcs to Chrysalis. That would not end well.
"Will you re-submit this story to Equestria Daily?"
Absolutely. I've got a re-write of the first four chapters that I'm working on, to smooth out some of the complaints from the EqD pre-readers. Then I want to comb through the comments and make sure I took care of any grammar errors or typos that had been pointed out. Once I'm satisfied that I've got that reasonably cleaned up, I'll send it off for another try.
Question from Serifina: "Just how thorough can the Ascent transformations be? Can it change anything in the mind?"
Currently, Ascent works down to a cellular level. Can they alter things in the mind? Potentially, but they need to be very careful, or it could go very wrong.
If you're asking if this can be used to alter or recreate memories, the answer is also 'potentially'. But the scientists would need to know exactly how to create those memories in the brain in order to do so. If they just tried to make memories, they'd likely end up with just a horrific mish-mash of nonsense. It would be easier to copy memories from someone else's brain.
Questions from Gluestick: "Was I correct when I first came across Malachite and got a glimpse of his powers to assume that he was going to be required to save them all?
Or, better put, was he always intended to redeem himself, even when everyone thought he wasn't to be trusted?"
When I first met Malachite, I knew that he was a very intelligent, very driven individual. He had his honor, but he would sometimes lose track of his ethics in pursuit of his goals.
He never intended to sacrifice himself. If given a choice between the entire Earth and himself, he would have chosen himself. He was always too afraid of death to even consider making that kind of sacrifice intentionally.
However, he knew there was a risk, and still took it. He believed he could handle it, but he still deliberately put himself in danger. More to regain Celestia's good will than anything, else, but still, it was a brave thing to do. He loved her, because she was beautiful, wise and noble and because she treated him with respect and compassion, but he also loved her because she never aged and wouldn't die; everything Malachite wanted for himself.
My intention was always to have him redeem himself this way. His sacrifice, though unintentional, saved lives and made him a very legitimate hero in the eyes of humanity. Prince Verdant is his legacy. We'll see how Malachite's "son" grows up, without the fear of death.
"A few other questions are How much insanity will Earth be thrown into from all this? What do you figure the social and political ramifications of this whole thing will be? How many crazy people anti pony cults are there going to be?
Griffons?
How much of that will be touched in the future installments?"
The side stories, and the later sequel, will touch on a lot of the craziness to come. There will be a LOT of adjustments to be made. As always, there will be intolerance and bigotry on both sides of the portal. But that will be overshadowed by the extreme gratitude that most of humanity feels for the Equestrian's work in saving our world, which will in turn make most Equestrians feel very appreciated and welcomed by humanity. For the most part, good will will abound. But not always.
As for cults... both pro and anti pony cults and organizations seem likely, as well as pro and anti human cults and organizations on the other side of the gate.
Griffons, you say? Hmm. I believe I can do something with that!
Questions by Shire Folk:
"Will Doctor Velchiek be criminally tried and convicted for his crimes against Erin?
Will Erin/Sunflower return to Ponyville and work at Fet Ex while she goes about getting her own place, or will Erin/Sunflower just return to Ponyville and have her own place provided for her thanks to the Princesses pulling strings for her...again? I understand favours here and there, but the girl would probably like to do something like getting her own place via her own power.
Will Meadowlark and Erin/Sunflower be able to patch things up while Erin/Sunflower studies pony magic in Ponyville? Related question, will Erin/Sunflower be able to foalsit Marigold again?
Will Erin/Sunflower go on a date with Lucky? I mean, the threat's gone; daily life can resume and Erin could, theoretically, fall for a pony even after she told her dad what she told him. Heck, if she becomes a real and true Equestrian pony this time it's distinctly possible that she could just go fully native."
These are all great questions, but I can't answer most of these, because of spoilers. These issues will be explored in Side Projects, I promise. Erin will definitely be heading back to Ponyville, though. That's where all of her friends live!
I'm planning on having a couple of "movie night" side stories, too. Indiana Jones? Absolutely.
Question from Yeoman: "My question is what happened to... Andrew I think from back at the beginning? You introduced him as a possible love interest then never mentioned him again."
This is another one that will be addressed in Side Projects, so I can't answer this one here without spoilers.
To wrap up:
This has been a fantastic experience for me. This is, by far, the longest story I've ever written, and I think I've learned a lot as a writer.
I want to thank you, once again, from the bottom of my heart. That people would take the time to read my story is very humbling, and it means the world to me.
Most sincerely, and with eternal gratitude,
~Hoopy McGee
Here are the author's notes. If you have any questions you'd like added to the Q&A, let me know, and I'll post them there.
Lots of things will be covered in the upcoming Sunflower: Side Projects, so I may not be able to answer everything.
Thanks again!
1408333 Again, it's beautiful.
I liked those ideas, although, I do have to agree some of those were REALLY silly.
Again, thank you for this wonderful story, and i'm looking forward to the sequel!
A Reader,
Odd_Shot
I suspected that you may have been influenced by TCB, at least you weren't so influenced that you would have made Celestia the villain. Thank you for answering my question, though it was a bit rhetorical and that wasn't the answer I was hoping for.
I enjoyed reading this story, I hope as much as you enjoyed writing it. It was very well done both in the realm of characters and plot. You made a redeemable villain, a overall conflict that could decimate the world, and a heroine who was not superpowerful or perfect but simple a woman who wanted to do what is right and save the world. Erin is my favorite pony.
I look forward to the sequel and the side stories. Also I find Princess Sunflower a lot funner than probably you think for Celestia sits on the Helianthus (Sunflower) Throne.
Best Regard and best of luck,
In the Name of Her Serene Majesty Celestia Everfree, Princess and Diarch of the Equestria Federation,
Celestia's Paladin: Ex Solis et Lunae, Provendtia et Prospertia
1408333
Question 1: Did you ever have Writer's Block while writing this story?
Question 2: What are you learning in College as your major (I'm not exactly good with College specifics, as I'm still in High School)?
Question 3: What was your favorite part of the story (it can be a chapter)?
This has been an absolutely fantastic story and is absolutely brilliant.
I've actually had some ideas about writing a short(?) story in this setting, I wasn't sure if it would be permissible, though, Now that I know it is, well... What's the Project Harmonics group and would you be averse to me PMing you questions, Hoopy?
Thank you for writing this story. I have enjoyed it very much. Good luck in your future endeavors.
This universe has so much potential.
I really like the concept of "Black Tide destroys Earth, living on self sustainable ships" idea. Would it be possible for me to use the Black Tide in a story like that, involving ponies?
Thanks for the insight! It's always awesome when an author goes and does something like this, because quite often some people just don't get the writing process and how complex, hateful, or bloody *BAM* here's your answer presented at this random moment it can be.
And I also want to thank you for answering my questions! I'll look forward to Side Projects now with even greater anticipation.
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
>>> I'd like to take credit for creating him, but honestly, there was no planning involved. He just showed up one day and introduced himself.>>>
Yeah... I know how that is... You think it's just a lucky break, that your subconscious made up something clever. But in fact... *whispers* He's REAL!! They ALL are! Every one like that! It's how they escape! Don't let him get into your mind or he'll do to you what Charline de L... ACK!! *Alondro collapses as a shadowy figure resembling an anthropomorphic lioness leers* Tut tut, my little slave. What did I tell about spoilers? *the figure drags Alondro away for punishment!*
Something wicked this way comes...
Also, glad to see one of my guesses about the Black Tide was correct! :D
It's much safer to use the Genesis Device! *watches Star Trek II and III again* Oh... ok, maybe not...
Okay, so you're saying it's basically okay for us to just make a story in your world, and do (pretty much) whatever? While that's cool, because we know there's going to be a sequel, I don't really feel the... urge? I mean, I feel like I would just be wasting my time, you know? It would be one thing if we did a good enough job for you to consider making part of what we wrote canon or something, but... Yeah, I just don't see why I would want to make an independant story in this universe if we know there's a sequel and side-stories coming up. XD
Did... Did I just get mentioned by an author? I think I did! Hoo-Rah! That, combined with reading the conclusion to this amazing story, has made my day very much. Thank you for that kind sir.
Yeoman, out
I must be out of my mind. Maybe I'm just crazy, but for some reason I want this Harmony world to be Minecraft. Weird. No idea where I got that from.
Also: sequel?!
A wild ride all the way through. Good on ya, mate.
Griffons are an interesting angle, but so too are minotaurs and whatever you decide to come up with for Diamond Dogs. (My personal headcannon about the lattermost of those is that "Diamond Dogs" aren't the name of the race, but rather this particular gang.) All are potential countries. Possibly have a scene at a Dragonsmoot/Dragon Migration?
Awesome story can't wait for the sequel!
Speaking of Queen Chrysalis, she still exists in this universe of yours, doesn't she? If this takes place after season 2 in canon, then she's out with her changelings in the badlands somewhere. Care to address that?Never mind, you answered this question, and I typed it before reading the answer.I'm glad to hear that you'll be resubmitting this to EqD. I'll share the heck out of it once it gets on there, and maybe we can get you a TV tropes article, an article on this wiki, and perhaps a reading by Reading Rainboom. Thanks for answering my question about Chrysalis and the Changelings!
1410272 You mean "headcanon". Two Ns, not three.
It's nice to see your thoughts behind this.
Neat idea, including a Q&A.
Awesome story
1408333
"Movie night" side-stories? I can think of one particularly, poignantly, potentially AWKWARD movie to show:
James Cameron's "Avatar."
Probably not Erin's first choice, but a Twilight with internet access would probably run into it while researching human films...
Ahh, I had wondered about the apparent TCB reference. Wasn't sure if it was a knock or just a good natured prod, glad to hear it was the latter. What you said here does make me wonder though, do most TCB stories not have a real reason for the conversions? I'm only familiar with the Cloudyverse stories, and in that universe there is a real solid need for them.
All in all this was a marvelous story and setting, and I am really looking forward to seeing where it goes in the future. I'm a big fan of the Ascent nanotech idea (I honestly believe that something like it is inevitable in our future, though I couldn't guess how long before we get there - technology moves fast after all, so it may be sooner rather than later), and the combination of it plus alternate universe doorways plus magical talking ponies has just loads of potential.
Good luck with the EQD submission!
1408564
I love Celestia far too much to ever make her the bad guy. She's far under-rated and under-utilized as a character, in my opinion.
1408668
The Project Harmonics group is for any stories that are inspired by or want to use the elements in this story, whether it's the whole setting or just co-opting certain elements and making them their own. I was hoping some people would want to write their own stories, and wanted a place to keep them all.
Yes, you may send me PMs with questions, or even post them to the group if you like
1409242
Well, I just wanted to give people the option. I'll be writing in this setting for... well, the next few years, probably
But I'm curious to see what other people would do with my ideas.
1410845
Yup, definitely re-submitting. But, if they don't accept it, I won't be particularly bothered. This story was already a lot more successful than I'd hoped, and I'm pretty happy with it as-is. Thanks for your support, though. Having an entry on TVTropes is just awesome!
1408842
On one condition: When you finish it, you have to let me read it
I've got a short greentext thing I'm planning to rewrite in prose and as something actually good. It's about a timid little pegasus traveling to earth (Chicago) from a small nowhere village in Equestria to live with an earth pony friend who has lived among the humans there her whole live. There are some similarities in the universes, like the manner of traveling between them, enough that I'm tempted to write it in as fitting this one. There are a few important issues though because I was playing around building my own thing, like human technology not working too well in Equestria and needing to be made differently enough to be more expensive in Equestria, with older level tech easier and faster to make. The end result being that the average small town pony might buy a computer that is at least fifteen years behind. The next problem is that I set the time as being in a relatively modern period, sort of as if the first contact had been made ten years ago, and in order to fit your universe it would take place thirteen years after the black tide at the least.
So maybe I should scrap the idea all together and keep it on its own.
1412212
I've delved into all there is to see with the TCB series, and even have issues with the 'cloudyverse'. I could get into that but really the main problem with even those fics, despite their lack of the usual 'humans are bad guys' dribble giving them bonus points, they continue on the lesser mentioned faults of the series. Things like 'the need for conversions', there doesn't need to be a need beyond the characters you're working with, does the world need to be doomed for enough people in your story to convert or can it just be a plague for which that magical potion is the only cure, resulting in a few thousand conversions and some new settlements in Equestria, but nothing as farfetched as the entire earth going pony.
And then there's the drama, why do we have horribly unrealistic, guns-a-blazin' terrorist groups out to do one crazy murderous shit, somehow competent and organized well enough despite the type of people said to be making up those groups. Aside from being the author's strawman/punching bag if they want to talk about why either ponies or humans are bad, the whole reason they exist is because of a certain 'need' people think their story has for hollywood style action and adventure. I've read fics that are nothing but slice of life and were fine as that, but which were ruined by forced elements of danger put in because the writer watches too many movies.
By now even the parodies of the series are annoying. It's not hard to write a TCB fic that isn't ridiculous, but people can't seem to get it. It's not worth even trying now. The name now to where it's against your best interest even putting it in the title. It would be better to try Hoopy's universe here or make your own. A writer would be better off with the cliche "twilight's spell goes wrong" premise than to write a TCB fic.
The way you made it so other people can make stories based on this universe is awesome!
I'm imagining Harmonics and Ascent discovering another world inhabited with an intelligent, extremely advanced race. Already many plots are just blooming in my head.
Anyways, awesome story! I'll be keeping an eye out for more by you!
so... it's finally over.
the greatest HiE i've ever read, a perfect representation of everything i love about the genre.
no annoying shipping/romance side-story to de-rail the narrative, no one-dimensional OC's, just a fantastic story from start to finish.
i think this story is ripe for side-stories, i'd could totally dig this as an expanded faniverse. i would totally write something for it, but i don't really feel confident enough in my writing to put someone else's narrative in the line of fire. i've been trying to break out of my procrastination loop long enough to publish a couple fanfic ideas of my own, and i'd want to release something original first.
but i would absolutely love to do something with this in the future, given a chance and a good opportunity.
I read this whole story through in two sittings and I must say, it was awesome. Until I read your plan for a sequel I was thinking of MAYBE trying my hand at writing something from this universe. Though with my own little technological spin on it. But I guess I will wait till your done with the next installment. Keep up the great work!
**MAJOR SPOILERS, if you're reading this from the table of Contents!**
I must say, this is an AMAZING story. I was completely hooked! I believe this is one of the best stories on Fimfic. Yay sci-fi!
It's a shame the Tide couldn't be explored more in-story. Could Malachite have observed more of its nature while being absorbed by it? (Pehaps sense what its purpose was- to form a network, to learn, etc.)
My question is, what is your justification for letting her become a pseudo-alicorn at the end? (Each race has unique magic, but a unicorn can study all of it anyway, right?) Did she really become okay with being like Malachite? Won't this pose an OP issue in sequels? (I understand the Ascent program is a technological Holy Grail, but still, utopias are boring.)
This was some awesome info to know!
This story is defiantly in my top 5, and will likely stay there.
Unlike a lot of stories I've read this one has the feel that it could actually be published and no character ever felt particularly overwhelming or overwhelmingly strong. You also kept the "threat mood" perfectly.
Don't know what else to "say" beyond: Can't wait for the sequel!!
Wow. Just...wow. I finally got around to reading the end of this, and that was amazing.
Is it a bad thing that my first thought when I read that they found a new world that they could live on was "I'ma get me a Jeep!" ?
I think it would be incredibly interesting to get to explore this new planet, there's bound to be some amazing geographical features to it. I can't wait to read on the exploits that occur in this new land, where no pony has gone before! Perhaps a joint pony/human exploration team? I'd try to write it myself, but my writing skills are somewhat shoddy.
...I'm largely expecting a Star Trek reference from a human sometime in the future.
So... is there any advantage to putting a Harmonics lab in Equestria? Can any Harmonics facility access the whole set of alternate worlds, or are there 'neighboring' dimensions that are easier to punch through to? It makes a difference; one could imagine a situation down the line where almost every world is one transit away from Earth and thus a quick hop down the hall away, or another situation where you have chains dozens of worlds long and you need to wait weeks for all the windows to line up...
Do you plan to add any new OCs in the hopefully upcoming sequel?
And you impress me again, sharing your notes on the story. This is much how I like to do things, and it makes me feel... validated.
Just... man. I'm losing sleep to write this. But it's sooooo worth it.
This is most definitely one of the best fanfictions I have ever read.
I'm looking forward to part 2. Cheers to you mate.
Found this recently. My eyes were glued to the screen from the first paragraph. Very well done!
And now my questions: Is this set in a world without fim, or has the fanbase been forgotten? Also, when is the sequel coming out? I must know!
Great story, I just finished reading through the whole thing in a few days.
You deserve all the internet mustaches.
That being said, I'm slightly disappointed the romantic subplot was axed.
It seemed like there was a bit of foreshadowing revolving around that, which while I didn't expect it to encompass a significant sect of the story, it would have been an excellent way to flesh out Equestria and Erin's interaction with pony society. And maybe create a little bit of embarrassing tension for Erin.
Eh, that's what future projects are for at least. Either way, amazing story.
I have one thing to say about there being a sequel.
Say it for me, M. Bison!
YES, YES!!!
Well, damn, guess I have to start on the side-stories now!
OK so... Just wanted to say this fanfic is one of my all time favorites on the site that I've read so far, and I've read a lot of stories by the way! This ranks up there in enjoyment level for me with stories like "Machinations of a Trickster". I liked your story telling ability and the way you more believably described the possibly-semi-near-futuristic technology (the harmonics tech gets a free pass for being rather advanced though, cause it's vital to the story) and how it was used to achieve spiffy things like what it was used for near the beginning of the story.
(vagueness due to reluctance to possibly accidentally reveal spoilers)
Is it okay that I use some of the elements in this story?
This will likely be drowned in the sea of comments, but I must say. This is by far the most addicting, and exciting fanfic i have ever read. From the moment i started it to the moment it was over, I have not stopped thinking about it.
You did an amazing job at everything. Character development was perfect, descriptive writing was amazing, and the story itself is pure gold. There is simply no better story out there than this. I want you to know, that i would be filled with joy if you would include me in a future story you write. I'd love to be a coauthor to you. I write alot of things, but I am far too shy to post anything ive written to anything, but people tell me i should. I really would love to if i could possibly write something eith you. Please send me a message.
Princess Luna
no good at scifi? NO GOOD AT SCIFI?!?
The writers of star gate would have welcomed you with open arms!
I do apologize for my nuke comment about 6 chapters back, I was over-analyzing.
I greatly enjoy stories that don't have the main protagonist have the abilities to take on impossible odds. Having characters that can fail and need the help and support of their friends is much more interesting. Thanks you for that.
Also, I'm glad you noticed that having Malachite be all evil would make him a boring stereotype. I have always hated the "light" vs. "dark" thing. The grey areas are more realistic and interesting.
I actually don't have any real complaints. That is surprising to me. I was really happy that you took the time to describe all the scenes with Erin. Every single one seemed to belong. I hate it when writers miss the chance to show interaction, even if it's not action packed.
So we can just... whatever? Like we could do anything from going Star Trek and exploring other worlds to having a Human try to learn in Equestria like Erin currently is, but as a human instead of pony, or as a pony, or... whatever? Your only limitation is that we not use Erin directly? (Like, OC could see Erin, contemplate talking to her, but chicken out because she's a 'celebrity', and that would be fine, yes?)
Also, sorry for spamming the PM's. I just missed that little bit when I skimmed earlier today, I suppose.
2771945
Agreed. There's actually a lot of literary theory on the "what" and "why" of that. (Far more than what I'm aware of, actually.) Here
are some interesting tidbits in case you want to do your own researchis a mini-lecture I couldn't bring myself to delete after it all just flowed out:The gist of it is that, when we read a story, we're not looking for success, we're looking for triumph. The harder it is for a protagonist to overcome what they face, the more satisfying it is when they finally do succeed. That's really the gist of the literary definition of a hero. A protagonist who overcomes insane odds to reach their goal. Making them ordinary and relatable magnifies that effect further.
Honestly, one of the biggest problems I've seen with heroic fanfiction is that, if authors don't coddle their characters, then they'll probably ruin the tone by not building the reader's trust in the consistency of the hero's ability to rise to the challenge. (That leads to the reader constantly holding themselves back from engaging emotionally in the story for fear of getting hurt when "the other shoe drops". The proper question in a reader's mind for a hero isn't "will they overcome this?" but "how could they possibly overcome this?")
That leads into the original, literary definition of "epic". Specifically, one or more small, ordinary people changing the course of the nation/world/etc. (From what I remember, a more accurate definition is "a hero, in the literary sense, changes the course of history", but it doesn't have the same clarity unless you draw special attention to the size difference between the hero and the problem.)
Together, those help to show why a good epic must embrace the fact that, instinctually, we always read stories for the characters. (Sure, you can have a book with humor or setting or plot and without characters, but that's not a story. It's just a jokebook or a textbook or the like.)
As social animals, our brains are designed to anticipate the behaviour of others and that means we need two things to stay engaged: Consistency (the ability to plug the observed behaviours into our "peer simulator" and get a valid model) and Depth. (A mind being complex enough that every new detail plugged into the model retains consistency while causing churn in the predictions of future actions.)
It's basically the same motivation structure used for any activity, be it video games, reading, a job, or whatever else. We come for the novelty, but we stay for the challenge. Hence why the best characters are completely unpredictable but their actions are forehead-slappingly obvious in retrospect. It hooks your social predictive instincts like a gambler at a slot machine... constant hits of "Ok, I've learned from that. This time, I'll surely get it!"
Humour is actually based even more strongly on this same principle at its root. You set up, in the reader's mind, a set of expectations, then derail them in a manner the reader finds comfortable when none of their predictions match. Hence why even the most concise possible joke follows the "murder, arson, and jaywalking" pattern. Two steps to set up anticipation of a pattern, a third to break the expected pattern. Even anti-jokes like "You mamma so fat... we are very concerned for her health" operate on that same basic principle. If "that's not funny", then either it was too unfamiliar for them to build expectations, too familiar for them to be caught off guard, or too uncomfortable to act as an emotional release.
Hence why character-centric writing and humour focused on poking fun at human failings age best. Society and technology change but human instincts don't. It's also why deep, nuanced characters don't just make any story better, they're one of the things authors "understand, but only at an intellectual level" far too often.
Focusing on character is also one of the two ways a story can become a classic, but I've already rambled on long enough as is. (Let me know if you care and I'll go into detail on that too.)
Wow amazing my brother told me about this and I loved it plz tell me the sequels name
My brother also came up with my name lol plus I'm a girl
I liked Malachite, he was a decent villain. Honest I thought the Tide was just the non magic Smooze, since that seemed like the simplest answer. This story has inspired me to try to revive one of my old fics in the junk pile, I think you are a great writer and you did a good job in this type of story without going to the usual route of horror, violence and gore.
This was the kind of story that forced me to sit down and read it, cover to cover (as it were) in 16 hours of wonder. All in all, I had a blast.
Would you believe I had originally taken this story off my "read later" list while you were writing it, thinking that it wasn't really going to be that good? I completely appoligize for that, as it's very evident (now that I read it) that the story is VERY good. Not sure why I was being such a moron before.
Anyway, fantastic story. I'll be starting on the side projects and am hoping you start the actual sequel soon.
I shotgunned this.
Now I just have to wait for sequel updates.
Yay.
I was honestly expecting Adam (I think that was his name) to appear again. I figured about a month after Sunflower appeared in Equestria, a stallion would appear under similar circumstances. Feeling like a coward for letting Erin take this huge risk while he backed out, he revolunteered himself just as Erin's new body was almost done cooking. He went through the change himself and was in the goo bath during Erin's training, which explained why he never saw her before she left. Considering He and Richard were already in isolation for knowing classified information, I don't see why they would be banned from seeing Erin's new body.
Obviously, it didn't pan out that way and the story turned out fantastic! I still can't help but wonder how having two scouts in Equestria could've gone. I imagine he could've acted as a foil to Erin. While she settled into a normal day to day routine, he would take the mission seriously and criticize her for goofing off. Anyways, it's just a big "what if" scenario in my head. I have a tendency to create headcanons for undeveloped characters.