• Published 30th May 2022
  • 1,283 Views, 103 Comments

Equestria and the Second Amendment - aegishailstorm

"Sure it matter's who's got the biggest stick, but it matter's a hell of a lot more who's swinging it!"

  • ...

Redneck Engineering

As the uncannily small and heavily armed golf cart drove through the thick brush of the Everfree forest. Scott explained to the group how he had ended up in this strange world. Though he wasn't a hundred percent on all of the stuff. Most of it was just a collection of far flung theories. This is what he currently had:

1. The rifle which he had fired off that morning was most definitely the cause of all of this.

2. Whatever caused him to be brought to this place had also pulled his friends in as well. Who were all in the same profession and or hobby as he was.

3. Donut had confessed to having a, 'vision,' of sort's, just moments before being dumped out into the forest. Consisting of what he could only assume was what was their... Reason for having been brought here? Nothing made sense any more.

After about 20 minutes of driving through the dark forest the group arrived at an improvised forward operating base set up by Matt and the other members of Demolition Ranch. The outer limits of the FOB was little more than a few tree's which the truck had knocked over and a few sandbags. Bona fide redneck engineering. Simple and mundane, but effective. The interior contained the surplus truck itself as well as a few crates of ammunition and supplies. With an American and Gadsden flag flying high overhead. Just past all of that was a shimmering rift which linked wherever they were now to the Texas wilderness back home. Sure, they could just go home right then and there. But where's the fun in that? Surely, they had to be there for a reason, " Oh look, another one of Scott's fifties went kablowey again. And it sent us all to gloomy forest with scary monsters." They were all on board with helping to get that answer. But first, before they went out on any expeditionary missions. They needed to rearm, rehydrate, and eat. Plus, they needed to update their viewers on what had happened since they were gone.

"Hey there guy's! Haven't seen you in a while!" Leaning up against the outer wall of the FOB was a grizzled old man with an M14 slung around his neck and an M1911 on a holster by his side. Also known as Hickock45, aka, Greg. The group of middle aged men waved to him as they piled out of the cart and immediately headed for the nearest box of MRE's and water containers. But Matt waved them over to a barbeque, and raised the top. " Brisket. Snatched it out of the freezer right before we left. It look's to be about ready. Eat up!" The group stormed over to the table and each devoured their portions while doing the the best they could to preserve their manners. By now the sun had entirely set over the horizon, and the camp was now only illuminated by a handful of lanterns which Matt and the others had brought over from earth. And the men's weapon mounted light's. Which were only on part of the time. After eating, they all sat down around a fire near the center of the camp.

"Alright, everyone, we'll be sleeping in shifts. Cody, Brandon, Scott, Greg, you ok with being first?" They all agreed. Though Brandon was a bit more hesitant on account of his aching back, which itself was the result of having to drag an, 'reasonably sized.' Collection of firearms through one of the densest forest's he had ever had the displeasure of having to hike through.

Now, as the night went on, the group alternated to Mike, Matt, and A.C, and just as the shift change occurred. Mike began to hear things in the tree's and bushes just beyond the perimeter. At first, Garand though that it might have just been the wind. So he ignored it, then, when it happened again, he decided to go and shine a light into the forest in an attempt to figure out what was going on. Still, nothing. So he stood there on the perimeter wall until eventually, his sanity began to slip. He was sure that there was something out there, but wasn't quite sure what it was. Eventually he got fed up with the rustling, and told A. C to watch it while he woke the others.

"Ugh, what is it Mike? Did the Space Nazi's show up?" Matt commented. He shook his head, " Nope. Everyone, get up! There's something out there and it's pissing me off!" He looked over at the mess tent, where Brandon was standing with a mug of coffee. Garand Thumb glared at him. He just shrugged in return, " What? I couldn't sleep. Hey, whatever the hells out there is keeping me up as well." He grabbed an AK74M off the folding table next to him, and hurried over to the other's. Who were in the process of grabbing and loading up their own guns. Together, the group of men fanned out into a defensive formation around the camp. And it wasn't long before they found exactly what had been causing the disturbance. And this time, Garand actually knew what it was. It was a cross between a lion and a scorpion and, just to make things weirder, it also possessed bat wings. Ok, just to make things clear, the fact that they now knew what was stalking them didn't make it any better. Because, at the end of the day, or, rather, night. It was still a fucking manticore. And a very angry one at that. Less than a hundred yards away from their outpost.

"So... what now?" Donut asked the rest of them. " Well it hasn't attacked us yet. So, maybe it's just passing by?" Matt reasoned, this was disproved when the creature caught sight of the group and charged at the walls with it's tail raised high above it's head. And, seeing that none of them wanted to die that day to either claws, fangs, or a stinger the size of a forearm they all engaged it at once. And, out of the nearly 20 shot's fired in under a second and a half, only 2 struck it; A nine millimeter from Donut's Carbine in the upper leg, and a 7.62 by 51 from the FN 17 which Brandon had let Angry borrow to the midsection of it's stinger. It howled out it pain and thrashed around, as it did so it stumbled right into a patch of brambles, causing it to become even angrier. It roared and ran off into the darkness and out of sight.

"Beer?" Brandon Herrera asked the group with sarcasm, slinging his AK over his shoulder. The rest of the group looked over at him nonchalantly and nodded. And so they left to wall and headed for the cooler. When, all of a sudden, they heard what sounded like hooves on the far side of the compound. So Donut went over and shined his flashlight into the dark. The expression on his face when he turned to look back at the group said it all.

"Uh... Guy's? I have a visual on what appears to be six multicolored ponies. And yes, after everything we've been through today. Y'all ought know for a fact that I'm tellin' the truth." Hickock put his hand on his head and shook it." Holy shit." He walked over to Mike's camera man and shook him awake. " Hey, get the camera rolling, you're.. Well, you're probably gonna believe what Donut just found. C'mon!" The camera man grabbed his helmet and camera, switched on the infrared future, and began filming. The group all scrambled to the top of the wall and looked over it.

Sure enough, standing a mere fifteen yards from the men was a group of multicolored ponies, though the former police officer had failed to mention one critical thing; 2 of these multicolored equines had horns affixed to their head, and 2 of them possessed wings. "Incredible." Mike murmured.

" Um... Hello? My name's Twilight Sparkle. " The purple one at the head of the group spoke. Brandon's eyes wandered from the creatures, back to his friends, then back again. " Just so we're clear, does everyone else see this?" They all gave silent nods. "Umm... Hello there?" The one who had identified herself as 'Twilight Sparkle' repeated. She held up one of her legs to shield her eyes from the weapon mounted lights. " Uh, Mike, first contact scenario, what do we do?"

"Oh I'll tell you what we do-" Angry stopped himself, and hunched back. " Actually, I don't know. Though I'm pretty sure the Military has a plan for this kind of stuff... That they never bothered to tell me about, so fuck it! Someone go introduce themselves!"