• Published 8th Apr 2022
  • 1,238 Views, 52 Comments

Friendship Is Scuffed, Multiverse of Chaos - Stalin with Da Spoon



Ever wanted to know what would happen if martincitopants, Rimmy downunder, TheRussianBadger, SovietWomble, Rubixraptor, detective dan, SMG4, Top gear, and many others wound up in equestria all at once? Well, here you go! The ultimate adventure!

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Prologue: Kevin's Evil Plan (And ultimate screw up)

Date: UNKNOWN.
Location: Kevin's warship, in orbit of equestria.
Time: 6:00 AM.

High above the planet of equestria, laid the badly damaged ruins of the once great warship Kevin used to command his war fleet as he sent them against his nemesis, martincitopants and the bean space program. Now, only one ship remained,and it was badly damaged, missing half its crew, and a quarter of its fuel remaining. Things were looking bad right now, but Kevin had high hopes, as he stood upon the outer deck of the ship, observing the planet below him. He did not need to breath, on account of him being in-human, so he simply just stood there, arms crossed as he observed the planet.

"Hmmmmmmm... No orbital stations or satellites, lack of space debris... We may have just warped in above a primitive world. This could either be a boon, or a curse, as it depends on the resources available to use..."

Heavy thinking noises emitted from Kevin, as he stared at the planet, before deciding to head back inside the vessel, opening the door to the airlock, and sealing it behind him. As he walked through the halls of the ship, smoke filled the air as panels on the walls sparked, the halls barely illuminated by red lights lining the halls, and alarms blaring as emergency power struggled to keep the ship going.

Deck engineers and medics rushing all over the place, making frantic repairs, some patching holes in the walls, some connecting cables, as a few medics ran by with wounded personnel on stretchers and in body bags, as a light burst into sparks right above Kevin, as they rained down on him. He did not even flinch a muscle, as he kept on walking, rounding several bends and corridors, moving by his crewmen as they saluted him and he saluted back. He suddenly saw his chief engineer, Jerry, as he walked up to him.

"Jerry, I need a status report!" The dictator shouted out loud towards Jerry, who was used to his shouting.

Jerry then replied with a half grin on his face. "Good news, we have established a stable orbit around the planet, and most major systems are beginning to come online again. Bad news, were still dead in the water. The dark matter fuel reserves burst open when we entered the vortex martin sent us through."

Kevin made sounds of disappointment and anger, but he accepted the fact they were still stranded, as he nodded to Jerry, patting him on the shoulder as he moved past him, making his way to the ships bridge, entering the navigation section and looking at a map of the planet, and towards his lead scientist, Robert, and his lead general, Wyatt.

Kevin then spoke in a stern voice. "Gentlemen, I assume we have gotten a good idea of our current situation, lads?"

The scientist nodded as a map of the planet was brought up on the holo table, as he spoke above the voices of several bridge operators managing the ships controls and monitoring systems. "Yes, emperor, we have dispatched five probes into the planets orbit to commence a scan, and we have found some... Fascinating results."

He said as they zoomed in on a particularly large land mass, as images of large towns and cities were displayed, from views of canterlot, to the crystal empire, to the changeling hives, as Kevin made noises of fascination, surprise, and most importantly, scheming, as he already began forming a plan in his head, as he turned to his general.

"Ready the soldiers, tell them to begin preparation for planetside deployment."

The general nodded, grunting in a gruff tone as he walked out of the bridge, with Kevin turning back to the screen, looking at several images taken of the local fauna, including the ponies, dragons, changelings, and other beasts that inhabited this strange land, with him turning to his scientist. "Tell me doctor, what technology do these... Ponies possess? Do they have a military? Air force? Navy?"

The scientist shook his head, answering his questions of these creatures military might. "They seem to possess large amounts of what appear to be royal guardsmen, but they are armed with little more than spears, it seems. From what we can see of technology, it is rudimentary at best, with hot air balloons, and carts wheeling around, a couple of trains even being sighted, so they are at least in a sort of steam age. There cities and towns are actually quite impressive in terms of architecture, so perhaps they possess a higher intelligence than we believe."

Kevin nodded his head at the words of the scientist, impressed by all they have managed to find out so far. "And what of these... Insect like creatures?" He said pointing to the images of said creatures surrounding the massive tower like hives.

The doctor replied in an unsure tone "They appear to be similar in stature and form to a pony, however, scans show they have a hard outer exo skeleton of sorts, and operate on a hierarchy of sorts, like the ponies."

Kevin nodded, fascinated by the variety of creatures in this strange land. He made sounds of confusion, unsure of what to do with these creatures. They were not affiliated with martin, that was for sure, so he had a few options. He could simply exterminate them, as even in the ships weakened state, its not like these creatures had the power to stop him. They could try establishing an alliance, establishing a connection between man and equine.

There was a third option though... Enslavement. Kevin knew it was pretty cliche to go with slavery right away though, so he backed off, and decided he would make such a decision later, as he turned back to his scientist. "If possible, acquire a specimen for study, and be sneaky about."

The researcher nodded, as he got a notification from his data pad, pulling it out of his pocket and looking at it, smiling as he revealed some truly good news. "Sir! We have successfully re-established communications with the remnants of our fleet! While we cannot send a message back, they have confirmed that they are on their way, but they state they cannot enter the same wormhole we entered, as it has closed, so we will need to construct a sort of... Gateway. Luckily, the ship has all the resources needed, so theoretically, we should be able to pull it off."

Kevin had a wide grin across his face, as he made noises of joy and satisfaction. Finally, they could get down to buisness, as he pulled out a radio and spoke into it. "Jerry, ready your construction teams, we got a portal to build..."

[Several Hours Later...]

Outside on the deck of the warship stood Kevin and several of his fellow crew members in their space suits, as he watched them put the finishing touches on the massive machine standing before him, mounted on the ships bow. It was in the shape of a large ring, as several cables and wires stretched all around it, connected to several ports on the ships hull, with several bits slowly rotating around the ring, a small radar dish slowly turning, and an array of tesla coils at the four corners of the gateways platform lightly sparking with electricity. The gateway was as large as the ship itself, barely attached thanks to the several cables tied to its sides, as head engineer Jerry walked up to Kevin in his environmental suit, speaking to his non-human overlord.

"Sir, the gateway is ready."

Kevin made noises of satisfaction, grinning an evil smile, as he raised his hand, clenching his fist around the handle of his trusty assault rifle, signaling to his engineers to activate the gateway, as they surrounded the controls, typing away at keyboards, pulling levers, turning dials, and pushing buttons, as the portal slowly flared to life, glowing a dark blue haze as the electric coils produced several large arcs, as the rotating bits of machinery rapidly gained speed.

Kevins smile was wide, until his engineers started to seemingly panic, as alerts popped up all over the screens, warning of a potential collapse, the portal itself turning red, as the electric arcs grew out of control, zapping at random parts of the hull and leaving scorch marks, the metal cables securing the portal slowly coming loose, as several large red streaks of light flew out of the portal, scattering all over the place, all heading down towards the surface of the planet, as jerry looked to his datapad, seeing the energy readings going off the charts, as he yelled out to his overlord in terror.

"SIR! ITS GOING TO TEAR THE SHIP APART, WHAT DO WE DO!?!"

Kevin was making noises of rage and discontent, grumbling as he aimed his assault rifle at the several cables holding the portal in place, shooting at them, trying to make them dis-connect, but it was no use, as suddenly, in a burst of dark red light, the gateway detonated, its frame shattering to pieces as the electric coils went haywire, their voltage blasting holes in the hull of the ship, a red blast wave rocking the entire ships frame, with multiple tears opening in the armor of the ship, with oxygen leaking, as engineers got to their feet and desperately made an effort to repair the damage.

Meanwhile, kevin was looking down at the surface of the planet, as the ship slowly began to fall towards the planet, knocked out of orbit as they slowly descended towards the planet, peices of hull breaking off, thrusters detonating as the ships hull began to heat up, burning through the atmosphere as Kevin rushed his crew inside of the ship, ordering everybody to brace for impact as the ship came down in a massive crash within the mountain range of equestria... And meanwhile, the rouge bursts of wormhole energy had spread out across Equestria, festering into smaller portals, as windows to other worlds opened and unknown beings began to emerge... From this day forward, nothing would be the same for Equestria...

[End Song]