Celestia had always been hardworking, she had always loved her job. She loved being a princess and everything about it- the power, the responsibility even. And most importantly, she loved that everyone adored her.
Celestia loved her sister. But when a pony loves two things, she’s bound to protect one over the other. And so, she did. Her sister wasn’t “banished to the moon”, contrary to common belief; she was dead.
Celestia believed she was a horrible sister, a awful person.
And of course, Luna comes back to tell her that.
Chapters (6)
Celestia... You have f******* up, BIG time!
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She knows very well
I don't know what made me click on this story, but I don't regret it. I like your writing style, it feels different than most else. Like poetry. Most of your paragraphs have a rhythm to them, and it certainly helps that you seem to like to rhyme. Look at your first paragraph.
Let me see if I can modify this paragraph to read like poetry.
The sun. A celestial body of shining light, beautiful and bright,
It would glow all day, but fade out at night
Just like Celestia, like everypony did.
Though the night was to some, the most enchanting time around,
With glittering stars galore and the milky moon shining down,
Nopony stood awake. Even for a moment.
They wouldn’t look at the sky and remark- or just for a second think how wonderful it was,
They would sleep. A passing of time before the sun would shine once again. Just a passage of time.
I don't know why I noticed this, but quite a few paragraphs in this story could easily become poetry, I think. Anyway, I enjoyed what's there and am ready for more.
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This means a lot. Thank you sooo much! Yes, I love poetry. This probably sounds cliche but the rhyming in that paragraph wasn’t planned, just mixed up on a pretty night. I guess it may come naturally sometimes?
I’ll try my best to keep you and the others interested!
Stumbled across this from the New section, gotta say I'm intrigued so far.
I do like these stories which play through the pretty f*cked up past between the two sisters (although this is kinda different, since she dead), because it's so obvious that Luna turned into Nightmare Moon for a reason, a reason the show itself never really ever gave us from the start. It doesn't seem too far fetched that Luna would've grown jealous and resentful over hundreds of years of being in her sisters shadow, to the point she'd become psychotic.
I also don't understand where all the nocturnal ponies are in this "no one cares about the night" situation. (Not saying that's anything this story does, it's something I've noticed in other stories on here) Surely there would've been a few people who had their sleep round the wrong way, right? I know I was like that at some points, going to bed at 10am and waking up at 6pm.
Soz for the tangent since its more a personal gripe with the show itself, but I guess it did set up the framework for this whole story, so something good did come out of it! Can't wait for more
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Cool story, friend.
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Thank you, and yes, your point is true. In this chapter, Luna is seen controlled by her emotions. Therefore, she doesn’t calm down, or think it through as much. Though some ponies may have done this, she’s talking about the vast majority (since she basically, at this point, doesn’t have a way to see if anyone’s awake, she just looks around and sees all quiet, barely anypony enjoying or having fun.) So mainly majority? They didn’t necessarily have to be sleeping either, just locked away. Hope that answered your point!
11203688
Hi again!
Ah, the things one would do to stay loved and adored by others
Well as always Celestia does what she's best at doing. Which is to completely Fuck up. You had my curiosity author. Now you have my interest. I'm expecting more chapters to come. And also why do i feel like we're gonna have Luna come back from the dead? Idk i just have a gut feeling that's what's gonna happen.
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Yup, and she’s gonna pay the price, right?
…Right?
And cool guess!
Oh boy. Celestia is losing it.
Good new chapter! Really enjoyed this one
Well i didn't expect this to come out right after i commented on the first chapter lol what are the chances.
Also i can't say my sadistic a$$ ain't enjoying this story because i very much am getting my kicks at seeing the sun monarch suffer but i swear if the next chapter is called "Luna's coming for you" im gonna be the one coming for you.
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I don't know how to feel about the way you said that
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I’ll probably just name it something generic like the others but luckily I’ve got it all planned out. Beware for some twists
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Thank you for the support!
It really is tragic. I can't imagine the world will be well with Celestia losing her mind, though.
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Yup, true. I wonder if she’ll ever heal.
SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESH!
Welp, time to call G H O S T B U S T E R S ! ! !
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And maybe a psychiatrist, too.
Jokes aside, this is an amazing and intriguing fanfic you have written here! It has been a while since I have seen a fic that takes place after the general time where Luna turned into Nightmare Moon. It has also been even longer since I have come across a fic where Celestia goes insane after she banished or killed her sister. From the first chapter, I knew that this would be very tragic; Hopefully, Celestia would recover from this state and possibly move on.
Also, you have gained a follower and fave of your story! I am looking forward to what happens next for our slowly deteriorating Celestia.
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I’ve got a lot in store for Celestia down the road, but we’ll see where she’ll reach at the end of this journey!
Yeah, our princess needs mental help, and Ghostbusters too. And fast.
AAAAaaa thank you a lot for the support, it means a lot!
It’ll be somewhere good, right?
…Right?
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I could only imagine...
Ahh. The black eyed kids have discovered the mlp universe i see.
I have like the weirdest boner rn. Don't judge we all have our things! It just happens my thing is demonic entities and fear.
*me knowing how black eyed kids work* Well Tia. What will you do? Will you let them in?
And eyup she let her in
I have two words for that. Natural Selection.
*eats popcorn* hah. F
ing classic "regret at the last minute" moment. Sorry tuts that door don't work any longer. Trust me, a lot of horror movie chicks have tried and it has failed miserably. I mean, a freaking mortal human managed to get through that with an axe "Here's Johnny
" so i would expect a ghost, demon or eldritch thing whatever this is to not have much of an issue.
Also would you look at that. My gut feeling that LuLu would come back was right after all. That or this is either a demonic thing acting like Luna or it's just Celestia's madness manifesting and making her see things. Well be it ghost, deceiving demon or hallucination whatever it is im very much enjoying the show. Keep the sunbutt torturing going because i very much enjoy seeing her descend into madness(My stars what is wrong with me. I have a feeling like i see how this will end. Im not gonna say it in case that's how it is and i end up spoiling the end accidentally im just gonna say that i have a feeling that reality isn't real. I'll leave to your interpretation what i mean by that.
Keep the story going either way. I do be loving it.
Also a suggestion i think this deserves a horror tag now. Just giving an opinion.
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Never heard of. Not really the best horror person to talk to here, haha
Black eyed kids?
Nice theory, and thank you for the comment! I may add the horror tag, just not sure if it’ll be as horror-y as other fanfictions if you know what I mean, since it’s focusing on some other things. We’ll see what happens next to our beloved Sun-queen (or, princess in desperate need of therapy) and her dead little sister in the next chapter. Your comments always crack me up!
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It's this scary legend about demonic childeren with black eyes that will knock on your door and ask to be let in. You can see why Luna in this chapter very much resembles what we in this world call black eyed children. I mean manifesting as a foal with black eyes and then asking to be let in is just screaming black eyed child.
I get exactly what you mean. You're trying to focus more on psychological thriller. It's your story you write it howevers thou wants.
Thanks i try
At this point, I honestly can't tell if Luna is actually coming back, or if this is just the beginning of Celestia's freefall into madness. It works, don't get me wrong. Both ideas are interesting and make me want answers.
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Quite the mystery, hm? Answers will be given soon enough! Thank you for supporting the story though!
Why isn't there a horror tag?
I personally see it as a psychological thriller rather than horror, mainly since I’m not the best at writing it and it focuses on some different things. However I may add the tag, just don’t want to disappoint any hardcore horror readers
Think gay then there's another mare in the room with you rn why don't you ask her out. (Yes i just did shut up and don't judge me)
Oh he knows he so knows he knows just as much as we know the earth is round he knows he f
ing knows. That or it's Luna in discusse because she probably ain't really evil and is only trying to fix her sis in a twisted way but still trying to do good.
Oh he so f
ing knows. Who would have that and not use it to spy on another's memories he so f
knows!
Or would Celestia need to be present for that to work? How does that work?
Wow. Just wow. That line right there. That's probably the best comeback. Ever.
Celestia: This is worse than death
Luna: Bitch I'm a ghost you don't know shit about death
AAAAAAAAAAAA THAT'S MA BITCH RIGHT THERE! That is ma fucking bitch give her a rap career she has fucking earned it WOOOOOO. That burned so deeeeeeeep.
Also i just realized. Isn't Star Swirl supposed to be roaming on limbo at this point?
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LMAO
Anyways regarding your question about Star Swirl in Limbo, I *have* planned that out luckily. I’ll be giving you answers soon, I promise. It will happen eventually, just not right now!
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I see. Well consider me intrigued.
This definitely isn't going to go well with "Luna" here forever now.
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Hmm… I agree. Hopefully Celestia can survive her.
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Achiement unlocked: Tulpa get
Forelegs. Ponies have forelegs. They don't have arms.
Star Swirl isn't an old man He is an old STALLION. Man is used for humans, not horses.
Aha! I knew it she wasn't really Luna when she proposed a deal but now that you've said that I'm sure that's something else. Maybe not going to say in case i end up spoiling herself? Who knows but consider me thrilled.
Celestia. Since you're turning into a masochist and your sister is a sadistic ghost and you're both royals so incest isn't that big of a deal for you so why not some good ol incestuous sadomasochistic spectrophilia. You know, make the best out of this situation. Why suffer when you can have fun. Or perhaps do both whatever you're into.
I have always resented Celestia for what happened in the show canon with Luna. I know that I should feel really bad for Celestia in this story, but I was so frustrated with the complete lack of consequence that she faced for mooning Luna in the show that reading about her suffering in this story is weirdly cathartic and enjoyable. I'm certain that that's going against the authorial intent, so I apologize for my spitefulness. THIS version of Celestia doesn't deserve nearly so much misery, but my frustrations with Canon Celestia are bleeding over.
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Could never really hate sun princess, but I completely understand what you’re saying. Celestia’s canon character lacked depth whatsoever. It dumbfounds me that she is shown to have no remorsefulness in the show. But I see it as she was carrying the guilt, and dealing with it similarly here. Part of the reason I’m writing this is because I wanted to add more to her bland character. There’s no way she faced zero consequences, even internally, and it’s frustrating to see in the show. They did the whole backstory so wrong.
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Yeah, really. From Twilight's potion flashback, it really was just a single fight that harmony decided Luna needed one thousand years of imprisonment for, and when she gets back her sister has endless love and devotion, a holiday celebrating her sun, and an entire city dedicated to her in coloration matching her white coat, gold jewelry, and purple eyes. All Luna gets is being completely forgotten outside of a really insulting holiday about how she eats foals. And SHE"S the one torturing herself with a tantabus for HER guilt!
They handled it SO badly!
I f
ing knew it! She is not f
ing Luna!
Oh? And who might "he" be?
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Aaaa, I just realized I accidentally misgendered the someone. That was meant to be a she. I thought I caught that sorry
But yes, very mysterious indeed
I hope this story continues, I'm already hooked
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Same
oooh very spooky