• Member Since 23rd Apr, 2020
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A pony of mystery in the darkness. Or I forgot to take the lens cap off. (They/them is fine.)


Locked in a room with a vampire, Twilight Sparkle awaits her own death.

"I'm counting off the seconds until you die," the domineering redhead said coldly. "One. Two. Three. Four. Five..."

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 32 )

Sometimes it seems that the only one who remembers that part of the folklore is Sesame Street.

this story is a comedy? because the synopsis and the title point to a joke, but it's without the tag... I'll put it on read later

(Mockingbirb searches to see if the website has a "Sesame Street" tag.)
Vampire(s) + "Crossover" tag + "Sesame Street" tag would have been a nice combination, if very confusing.

Vamponies are dangerous, blood-sucking creatures. But they're hurt by sunlight, and...when they encounter a pile of beans or peas or rice, they have to stop and count each grain.

Please tell me this is more fandom-made horseapples? Don't remember this ever being a thing for proper vampires. And I know the pony knockoffs share a lot with proper vampires.

Great ending though.

Gonna be honest, I either never knew or completely forgot that was a part of actual vampire lore.


"Proper" vampires are way older than you think, and there's dozens of variations all around the world. The counting compulsion is often forgotten, but well-recorded in some myths. Throwing grain and waiting for daylight is the most reliable, low-risk way most people would have of killing a vampire.

It's real, and the basis of a Sesame Street character.

(They changed the logo while the Internet wasn't looking, and I found out about this when going to Wikipedia to grab it)

EDIT: :derpyderp1: Well, I guess you could manually copy and paste the URL...


It is actually some traditional folklore in some regions that vampires have a counting obsession along with an obsession with untying knots and not being able to cross running water which admittedly the not being able to cross running water is something that lets say the wild hunt also suffers from.

Though the idea of beans somehow warding off evil in some way seems to be rather old, in ancient Rome there was a religious festival that involved throwing beans to ward off the evil dead and there is apparently tradition in Japan of throwing roasted soybeans to ward off Oni that takes place as a part of a yearly festival in February.

Traditional folklore of various cultures can be weird and sort of fun.

Glad to see someone else who remembers that part of the old lore.

And also, great job making it not just a joke here. The sheer tension of the wait from night to dawn would be indescribable. :twilightoops:

Barring that what most consider "proper" vampires only came about due to anne rice (i believe it was her who brought up the whole burning in the sunlight thing, or at least popularized it. i know dracula was able to walk freely), the counting is veeeeery old vampire lore. and even if it wasn't, who cares, vampires aren't real

Anyway, fun as hell story

Technically the movie Nosferatu also had the sunlight thing.

Probably the vampire-esque monster where it's most well-known is the jiangshi, but there's quite a few vampire myths where it's a thing.

Vamponies are dangerous, blood-sucking creatures. But they're hurt by sunlight, and...when they encounter a pile of beans or peas or rice, they have to stop and count each grain.

Why would they have to count each grain? What would happen if they didn't?

Nothing, they're just ridiculously OCD.

I suppose the question is why she can't simply kick some rice under the shelf and hop over sunset while she crawls under to count. Or just open a second bag of rice.

People who run their mouths about "proper" vampires have no idea what they're talking about. There is no "proper" vampire; just about every culture has a different vampire legend and many have three or four different ones. One African "vampire" is a firefly that flits around and eats children.

I will agree however that there is nothing proper about Twilight Saga, neither in its vampires nor in its basic respect for the reader and for literature at large.

Compulsively counting dropped objects is a distinct trait of Asian culture - almost every single ghost, spirit, zombie, or monster has to stop and do it. This notably includes jiangshi, the hopping zombies once known in English as "Chinese vampires". Jiangshi aren't even known to drink blood, though they do steal life force / qi.

In Japanese mythology, Okiku was a servant-girl who refused the advances of a noble. She was also responsible for counting the royal plates, and the punishment for losing one was death. The noble hid one of the plates and got her killed, and her ghost continues to count nine plates and begin wailing when she can't find the tenth. I think this is probably a huge influence on the whole "ghosts and vampires have to count things" trope.

Asian cultures are rather superstitious and don't like certain numbers, so they may have written their ghosts to say a lot of numbers to give them a weakness. Making a Japanese ghost say shi ("four" but also "death") is usually very damaging to at least their poor ghost feelings and might actually physically injure them.

Oh and the story is funny thumbs up.

Another interesting tidbit about Jiangshi is the reason they're also known as "hopping vampires": possibly because the Chinese have a long history of medical scholarship, their mythological ambulatory corpses become steadily less ambulatory as rigor mortis kicks in.

Short and simple, if not especially climatic.

Although how can she know she has enough rice to survive the night, if she doesn't even know how much she has?:duck:

Ah yes, the soucouyant

It's possible that she only threw part of the rice she had, so she can keep repeating the same tactic over and over.
The calculations were probably comparing how long Sunset took to count the first batch vs the time for help to come.

You're completely right, my mistake. haven't seen that movie since high school, and I prefer book dracula over any (even vague) adaptation :P

It mostly sticks in my head for the hilariously casual stroll with a coffin bit.

Nosferatu is actually the originator. They'd written themselves into a corner by making Count Orlok too overpowered to defeat, so they had him burst into flames and die basically at random.

Twilight huddled in the corner farthest from Sunset. She thought, Sunset picked this room because no one comes into the kitchen after school. But if I can stay alive until the cooks come to make breakfast...I think I can escape.

Changes from the third person you mostly use for the fic to first person like this was a bit jarring, and happened a few times, but otherwise, it was an okay fic. A bit more suspense would have done it some good, but a thousand words is a thousand words.
Also, I learned a new bit of vampire lore, so kudos for using that.

What if Sci-Twi cooked the rice in some Holy Water...?

This feels like it should include the comedy tag


It's my understanding that people who worked abroad or otherwise died away from home would be transported back home for burial by being tied to long bamboo sticks and moved at night. This caused their corpses to seem to hop along.

I do love the weirder parts of vampiric folklore. It's a good thing CHS is a public school; imagine Sunset having to get someone to invite her in every day.

Great stuff, though I'd argue it would work better if Twilight were less certain about her survival at the end. Still, thank you for it and best of luck in the judging.

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