"Buried... not many of us will ever get that honor... but we few will die below ground... never see the light of day or the beauty of night... as we deserve,"- Krieg engineer
Got some questions how much does a body remain organic will he be a father figure for Scootaloo and how old is he but keep up the good work man don't give up
Well, I now know what Isekai mean. It's a fine start, that highlight the... stark difference between those two universes. Luckily for them the CMC didn't checked out their now former guard before leaving, that might have made things ankward.
I'll be following, I'm curious of what lies ahead.
interesting start, but lots of words are messed up a lil bit, some sentences flow awkwardly, and lots of commas are reportedly MIA.
EX of poor sentence flow - "Reaching for his mouth to cover it with his hands from the amount of pain this experience was to him, only to feel that his hands were bound." overall, it makes sense, but it's still awkward
EX of MIA commas/punctuation - "Pulling his trigger one last time he watched as the shot from his Mark 22c shotgun ripped apart the center mass of an infected imperial citizen..."
EX: of fucky wording - "Shotting up the Krieger gasped."
still like the story tho and look forward to updates
I oh so want to keep reading this, as it is hard to find someone who writes 40k that actually KNOWS 40k. At the same time though I am no fan of anthro, I just wish to let you know that you sir are doing what most cannot
Only thing I should point out is your rather expensive use of the machine spirit worship.....from a Kriegs man? They don't worship the machine spirit hell I don't think they believe in the trinity let alone the machine spirit. No guardsman does they only tolerate the heretics because they build all their tech And before death a Kriegs man will never pray to a false god to forgive them. He'd say something more like "emperor forgive our past sins with this sacrifice" or "allow me to join thy God emperor in the warp and fight by your side" as all Krieg believe there's nothing greater then dying for the emperor to wash their past sins of heretic rebellion away and joining him in the after life to fight deamons in his name. So apologising to the machine spirit? Yea I don't think any Kriegs man will unless he's a fake Kriegs then probably yea
I didn't know Warhammer 40K had vampires in it. Or did you just add them to the story yourself?
Got some questions how much does a body remain organic will he be a father figure for Scootaloo and how old is he but keep up the good work man don't give up
11137487
Blood angels have a little something called the red thirst, pretty deep lore but yes they are basically vampires.
I do believe their chief librarian is based on Dracula.
His name is Mephiston:
storage.googleapis.com/spikeybits-staging-bucket/2019/06/Screenshot_237.jpg
But this doesn't involve the blood angels.
I like it already. Can't wait to see what happens next. Also will you finish the story "Fire and Steel"
soon
Of to a good start and looking forward to seeing more and what the setting for the mlp world here is gonna be like
Well, I now know what Isekai mean. It's a fine start, that highlight the... stark difference between those two universes. Luckily for them the CMC didn't checked out their now former guard before leaving, that might have made things ankward.
I'll be following, I'm curious of what lies ahead.
interesting start, but lots of words are messed up a lil bit, some sentences flow awkwardly, and lots of commas are reportedly MIA.
EX of poor sentence flow - "Reaching for his mouth to cover it with his hands from the amount of pain this experience was to him, only to feel that his hands were bound."
overall, it makes sense, but it's still awkward
EX of MIA commas/punctuation - "Pulling his trigger one last time he watched as the shot from his Mark 22c shotgun ripped apart the center mass of an infected imperial citizen..."
EX: of fucky wording - "Shotting up the Krieger gasped."
still like the story tho and look forward to updates
11137679
I know but from what I have been told I'm getting slightly better over the years, compared to my original stuff.
I haven't read one of your stories in a long time, but I can see that they have gotten better, good job
Nothing like seeing a crossover start with the CMC. It's like a cliche you like to see in movies. Keep it up!
Well, what a surprise, a guardsman helping ponies, you got my attention. A few error but nothing too big.
Also,your Story reminds me of a comic
"Know"
unless this is a grimdark AU I think it's "bet" hahaha
Interesting premise would like to see more
11138116
Thanks for the assist… grammarly is suppose to help
Ah yes a fellow 40K collector how fares your army noble guardsman?
I oh so want to keep reading this, as it is hard to find someone who writes 40k that actually KNOWS 40k. At the same time though I am no fan of anthro, I just wish to let you know that you sir are doing what most cannot
Only thing I should point out is your rather expensive use of the machine spirit worship.....from a Kriegs man? They don't worship the machine spirit hell I don't think they believe in the trinity let alone the machine spirit. No guardsman does they only tolerate the heretics because they build all their tech And before death a Kriegs man will never pray to a false god to forgive them. He'd say something more like "emperor forgive our past sins with this sacrifice" or "allow me to join thy God emperor in the warp and fight by your side" as all Krieg believe there's nothing greater then dying for the emperor to wash their past sins of heretic rebellion away and joining him in the after life to fight deamons in his name. So apologising to the machine spirit? Yea I don't think any Kriegs man will unless he's a fake Kriegs then probably yea