Eltirion's Chaotic Collection

by Eltirions

Prologue

Author's Note:

This is a crossover with a self-made universe.

An excited Twilight Sparkle bounced down the hallway of Canterlot Palace. On her flanks were twin saddlebags, filled to the brim with books and other materials necessary for her lessons.

The filly arrived in front of the door to the Princess' quarters. Two guards flanked at it, and smiled as they spotted.

‘’Good morning, Miss Twilight,’’ one of them said as the other opened the door for her.

‘’Good morning sirs,’’ Twilight replied with a bow of her head as she walked through the door into the Princess’ quarters.

‘’Princess? I'm here!’’ she called out as the door closed behind her.

‘’In here, Twilight,’’ the Princess said from inside her study. Swiftly, the filly walked up to the door of the study and pushed it open.

‘’Good morning Princess…’’ Twilight trailed off as she saw the room.

The Princess was laying next to the hearth on the carpet. Her regalia lay on the desk, but that wasn't what drew Twilight's attention.

What did draw her attention was the other being currently in the room. It was seated on the carpet as well, with crossed legs. It's face was pale and hairless, and it had a dark brown mane that fell down to his shoulders. Two other limbs hung from his shoulders, covered by blue robes. However, they ended in strange appendages, which bore a resemblance to those of the minotaurs.

Both the Princess and the other had turned their heads towards Twilight. The being’s eyes were as blue as the Princess’ were purple, a deep entrancing colour that you could easily get lost in.

Then it spoke, with the voice of a stallion. ‘’Your student, Tia?’’

The Princess nodded. ‘’Indeed, Ruilael.’’

‘’Uhm, Princess? Who is this?’’ Twilight asked.

‘’I am Ruilael Firsir,’’ the being answered before Celestia could. ‘’God of Water and King of Elfris. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Sparkle.’’ He stuck out his hand to her.

Blinking, Twilight gently shook it. ‘’Pleasure,’’ she said in a stunned voice. Her mind was racing at a thousand miles a minute. Who was this stallion? God of Water? Where did he come from? What was he?

The sound of the Princess’ voice broke her train of thought. ‘’Lay next to me, Twilight, and we’ll begin our lessons for the day.’’

‘’Of course, Princess,’’ Twilight said, laying down on the soft carpet. She took off her saddlebags with her magic and placed them next to her. ‘’What will we be covering today?’’

‘’It probably has something to do with why I’m here,’’ Ruilael remarked. ‘’After all, this isn’t a social visit.’’ He leaned forward. ‘’So spill the beans, Tia dear.’’

Twilight resisted the urge to frown. The casual way that Ruilael addressed the Princess indicated a level of familiarity between them, and also partially supported his claim of divinity. Even the most powerful leaders from other nations addressed the Princess with respect; that Ruilael did not probably meant they were good friends or he wasn’t afraid of her. Or perhaps it was both.

‘’Very well,’’ the Princess said. ‘’Today, my faithful student, we will be discussing other worlds.’’

‘’Ah.’’ Ruilael leaned back again with a smile. ‘’So that’s why I’m here.’’

‘’Other worlds?’’ Twilight repeated. ‘’Forgive me Princess, but I thought that was just a theory.’’

‘’There is a portal to a mirror world to ours in this very Palace,’’ the Princess said. ‘’And there are other ways to travel between them, such as the one Ruilael uses to get here.’’

‘’To be fair,’’ Ruilael took over, ‘’My way is unique, as are most others. Generally, these portals have very specific instructions and limits, and messing with them can go catastrophically wrong very fast.’’

‘’You’re from another world?’’ Twilight asked with wide eyes. That would explain why she didn’t recognize what he was.

‘’It is not obvious?’’ Ruilael asked rhetorically. ‘’I would hope that none of the Elfsir have managed to find their way here. It would be most… problematic.’’

Twilight’s mind was swimming with questions, but the Princess raised her hoof to stifle them. ‘’Patience, my dear student,’’ she said with a warm smile. ‘’Hold your questions for now; I think I have a book Ruilael wrote with answers to most of them somewhere around here.’’

‘’I did write such a book,’’ Ruilael acknowledged with a chuckle.

‘’I have so many questions,’’ Twilight interrupted.

The Princess’ horn lit up, and a blue book flew from one of the bookcases towards her. Laying in front of Twilight, she noticed that the cover seemed to be made of water, but that couldn’t possibly be true, right?

‘’While you read this,’’ the Princess’ voice once again brought her out of her musings, ‘’Ruilael and I will discuss old memories. Feel free to listen in and ask any questions you can’t find answers to in the book.’’

‘’Now then,’’ the Princess stood up, turned sideways, and dumped herself in Ruilael’s lap, head angled towards Twilight. ‘’I demand backrubs.’’

Ruilael laughed. ‘’As my lady commands.’’ He brought up his hands and gently began to rub the alicorn’s back, while Twilight stared in shock as the Princess let out a content sigh.

‘’I love it when you do that,’’ she commented idly.

‘’You like my fingers administrating your body?’’ Ruilael quipped, a small smirk forming on his lips.

‘’There are children in the room,’’ the Princess observed, and Twilight saw she was blushing?

‘’Only one, and that’s your student,’’ Ruilael countered. ‘’Who, I trust, can keep a secret?’’

‘’Of course,’’ Twilight said hastily. ‘’I wouldn’t even dream of betraying the Princess’ trust!’’

Ruilael smiled at her. ‘’Good.’’

Then he leant in and kissed the Princess.

Twilight’s brain shut down as she watched the Princess respond with vigor. She flipped around, laying on her back and wrapping her forelegs around Ruilael’s neck, holding him.

‘’What?’’ Twilight finally managed to whisper. If the other two noticed, they didn’t show it, too busy kissing each other.

Finally they broke apart, both panting and smiling widely. ‘’What?’’ Ruilael asked, seeing Twilight’s increasingly shocked face. ‘’Can’t an engaged couple kiss each other?’’

Twilight’s body finally caught up with her brain, and with a thud the mare fainted, head dropping onto the carpet.

|-x-X-x-|

When Twilight finally came to, the first thing she noticed was that she was lying on and under something soft. She tried to sit up and lift her hooves, and wondered when she had fallen asleep.

‘’Hey, you. You’re finally awake,’’ a stallion’s voice said.

Twilight opened her eyes to see Ruilael and the Princess sitting next to the bed she was apparently in. Looking around, she blanched when she recognized it as the Princess’ own bedroom. ‘’What happened?’’ she asked with a parched throat.

A glass of water floated over to her, held in the Princess’ magic. ‘’Drink,’’ she ordered. ‘’You’ve been out for a few hours.’’

‘’What?’’ Twilight said. ‘’Why didn’t you wake me?’’

‘’Because Tia didn’t want me dumping a bucket of ice-cold water over your head,’’ Ruilael answered with a dry chuckle. Twilight noticed he was playing with some sort of green crystal in his hand, twirling it around on his finger.

‘’Also because it probably wouldn’t have worked,’’ the Princess added. ‘’How are you feeling, Twilight?’’

‘’I can’t seem to remember what happened before I blacked out,’’ Twilight replied. ‘’I remember entering the room and talking with you, and you did something together, but after that…’’ she shrugged helplessly.

‘’Yes, that was when we started kissing and then told you we’re engaged,’’ Ruilael said.

Twilight blinked, resisting the urge to faint again. ‘’Let me get this straight.’’ She pointed her hoof at the Princess. ‘’You, the immortal Princess of the Sun,’’ she moved her hoof to Ruilael, ‘’are engaged for who knows how long to him, a god from another world.’’

‘’That is correct,’’ the Princess said serenely, and Ruilael nodded along with her.

‘’Why?’’ Twilight finally asked.

‘’Rather a long story, that,’’ Ruilael replied. ‘’We’ve been engaged for… what, the better part of three-hundred years?’’

The Princess nodded. ‘’Indeed. It all started when…’’

|-x-X-x-|

690 ALB

Celestia stood in front of the mirror, decked out in her armour. Her spear, Brightflame, hung on her flank, ready to be used at a moment’s notice.

‘’Your majesty, are you sure about this?’’ her steward asked with a nervous voice.

‘’Yes, I am,’’ Celestia resolutely replied. ‘’Equestria can survive for a decade without me. The Sun will raise and lower itself while I am away.’’

The steward sighed. ‘’Then all I can do is wish you good luck, Princess.’’

Celestia inclined her head. ‘’No pressure,’’ she quipped, before activating the portal and jumping in.

|-x-X-x-|

2000 B.G

‘’Have fun,’’ Eltirion said as he and Ruilael stood in front of the Emerald Throne.

‘’That I will,’’ Ruilael promised. He was wearing his armour, and Idosor hung from his belt.

The two elves shook hands, then Ruilael jumped into the swirling emerald portal.

|-x-X-x-|

Celestia landed on the ground, and immediately prepared her spear. A noise behind her alerted her, and she swirled around to see a tall creature.

Both moved at incredible speeds, and it’s sword met the tip of Celestia’s spear with a metal clang.

‘’Good morning,’’ the creature said with a male voice. ‘’Before we beat the shit out of each other, I’d prefer to know your name.’’

‘’Celestia, Alicorn of the Sun,’’ Celestia replied as her horn lit up.

‘’Ruilael Firsir, God of Water,’’ the creature introduced himself. Speaking of water, an orb of it appeared in his other hand.

‘’Dimensional travel?’’ Celestia suggested after a short silence.

‘’Quite,’’ Ruilael agreed. He pulled his sword away and the spell in his other hand disappeared as he offered it to her. ‘’Allies?’’

‘’Sure,’’ Celestia said, as she shook his hand with her hoof. ‘’I don’t suppose you have any idea where we are?’’

‘’Nope,’’ Ruilael responded. ‘’Shall we discover it together then?’’

‘’That seems acceptable.’’ Celestia nodded as she put Brightflame away.

Just then, a bolt of lightning soared over their heads, followed by a loud roar. ‘’I do suggest we check that out,’’ Ruilael suggested.

‘’Let’s go then.’’ Celestia spread her wings and flew up. Ruilael eyed her for a moment, then began to walk along with her.

‘’So,’’ he began, ‘’why did you decide to hop dimensions? From your appearance and title, I assume you’re at least some sort of god-like being.’’

‘’I got bored ruling a country alone while my sister is stuck in her time-out,’’ Celestia replied with a scowl. ‘’You?’’

‘’Got bored ruling my country as well,’’ Ruilael said. ‘’All the fucking paperwork really gets to you after a century or so.’’

‘’Tell me about it,’’ Celestia chuckled.

‘’Especially since everyone is fucking immortal,’’ Ruilael went on. ‘’Anyhow, what even are you?’’

‘’An alicorn,’’ Celestia answered. ‘’The mix of all three pony races, immortal and with powerful magic.’’

‘’Huh.’’ Ruilael didn’t seem fazed in the least. ‘’Well, I am an elfsir; to be more precise, I am an a firsir, the only one remaining because my family decided incest was a small price to pay for pure blood.’’

‘’Some traditional unicorn families are like that too,’’ Celestia remarked. ‘’Keep the blood pure, like you said.’’ She sniffed. ‘’It’s quite disgusting.’’

‘’Indeed,’’ Ruilael agreed. ‘’Say, it appears we’ve reached our destination.’’

They had. They stood on a cliff, and below them a dragon fought with several mages, who were shooting lightning at it.

‘’Who do you think we should help?” Ruilael wondered aloud as he overlooked the scene.

‘’The dragon is usually the aggressor,’’ Celestia pointed out, ‘’but we have no clue how this world even works. I say we simply stride in, ask what in Tartarus is going on, and then knock out whoever gives the answer we like the least.’’

‘’Sounds like a plan,’’ Ruilael said. ‘’Let’s do it.’’

He kicked himself off into the air, floating there without a care for gravity. Then he dove off the cliff, Celestia following behind him.

No one noticed them landing on the ground, a few meters away from the fight. ‘’After you,’’ Ruilael said.

Celestia gave him a stink eye, then marched onto the battlefield. ‘’WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?’’ she bellowed in the Royal Canterlot Voice. Ruilael winced, and the fighting parties both turned towards them.

‘’A talking horse…’’ one of them muttered.

‘’And an elven god,’’ Ruilael added as he walked up next to Celestia. ‘’Like my companion said, do explain what in Auri-Len’s name is going on here before we decide that just kicking both of your asses is the easier solution.’’

After a few seconds of shocked staring, one of the mages spoke. ‘’This dragon has been terrorizing the nearby village!’’

‘’I have not,’’ the dragon rumbled. ‘’I have told you this, but you will not listen.’’ He shook his head. ‘’I have no desire or want to interfere in your mortal lives, as long as the favour is returned.’’

‘’Then how come all the villagers were talking about you stealing their livestock?’’ the mage countered.

‘’That was not me, imbeciles,’’ the dragon said. ‘’That was a rival of mine. In fact, I was on my way to smack some sense into him when you,’’ he poked at them with a claw, ‘’decided to shoot at me.’’

‘’I feel ignored,’’ Ruilael muttered to Celestia as the mages and the dragon continued to bicker.

‘’So do I,’’ Celestia agreed. ‘’Not a bad thing, actually.’’

‘’Never said it was,’’ Ruilael pointed out.

The mages and the dragon were still discussing who was wrong and who was right. ‘’Right, time to go,’’ Ruilael said. ‘’I’ve had enough.’’ He spun around and walked away.

Celestia followed behind him as they disappeared into the forest. ‘’What now?’’ she asked.

‘’No idea,’’ Ruilael replied honestly. ‘’Find civilization? There’s supposedly a village nearby.’’

‘’Well, I don’t know about you, but I can survive on sunlight alone,’’ Celestia informed him.

Ruilael nodded. ‘’It’s water for me.’’

Silence fell between them. Celestia’s armour was silenced by enchantments on it, and from the looks of it so was Ruilael’s.

‘’I think I see the village,’’ Ruilael said after they had walked for some time. Indeed, smoke was billowing above the trees.

Celestia frowned. ‘’I’m hearing some sound of battle,’’ she said cautiously.

‘’I hear it too.’’ Ruilael’s hand went to his sword. ‘’Oh well, at least a fight will be great stress relief.’’

As they continued on, the sounds got louder and louder, until they broke through the trees. The village was in front of them, and what appeared to be bandits were slaughtering the civilians.

Ruilael and Celestia shared a look, then drew their weapons and sped forward.

Celestia was slightly faster, and her spear slammed into the side of a bandit. He was launched backwards and landed with a sickening crack. As Celestia whirled around to block a strike from the bandit’s friend, her horn lit up and missiles of light shot out, heading towards other bandits.

Ruilael’s sword cut a bandit clean in half, and with a flick of his wrist he sent the pieces flying into nearby bandits, who stumbled back. He jumped forward, and his speed was dazzling. The bandits stood no chance.

|-x-X-x-|

‘’So why haven’t you married yet?’’ Twilight asked when the story was finally over.

‘’Oh, that’s because my sister is still in her thousand year time-out on the moon, and I’m not getting married unless she can attend,’’ Celestia said as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

‘’Your sister is on the moon? The Mare in the Moon is real?!’’ Twilight exclaimed.

‘’Yup,’’ Celestia replied. ‘’She threw a tantrum that blew up half the Everfree, and so I gave her a thousand year time-out. She’ll be released in a few months time.’’