Coming Out Of My Cage

by Boopy Doopy

(21) So What

Katrina did as she promised and took the long way back home, walking slowly so her brother could appreciate the scenery. Eventually, the two of them found themselves at a fork in the road, one side having a sign indicating that the Apple Family orchard was ahead. The castle was in clear sight down the other path, but she already saw Jase heading down the other fork.

“Hey, it’s this way,” she told him as he walked. “You can see the castle right-”

“I wanna see more stuff!” he interrupted as he turned around to her. “You have all night to be awake. I know you stay up until five-thirty every morning. That’s, like, eight hours from now. This is supposed to be an alien world, and I want to see alien things.”

“Didn’t you get sent home from Arby’s until next week? We have all day tomorrow to see whatever you want to see, okay? I’ll go to sleep early so we can have more time.”

“Yeah, well, you’re saying that now, but before I know it, you…” He trailed off, looking at something in the distance intently, a serious expression on his face. It got Katrina to turn around to see what there was, finding nothing out of the ordinary. A second later, she heard him galloping away, laughing loudly, and frowned when she realized the trick.

She muttered to herself as she set off after him, slightly jealous that he didn’t trip over his hooves or step on his tail as he ran. It was something she still couldn’t do after having spent what had to be hundreds of hours here, and yet he picked it up in a fraction of the time, moving as naturally as everyone else she saw. She was grateful that he at least stopped and waited for her once he got farther ahead. He was still laughing when she got up to him, and had a look that said he was proud of what he’d done.

“I can’t believe that actually worked,” he told her. “I’m pretty sure I’ve used that trick on you before, and you fell for it again.”

“You act like a child, you know that?” she reprimanded. “Ten years and absolutely nothing has changed about you.”

“If you can believe it, Dad said that very thing about me just a few days ago,” he smiled. “What a coincidence!”

“Yeah, well, he’s right about one thing,” she decided. With that, she shook her mane out of her face and continued forward. “Let’s go, since you want to act like a twelve-year-old.”

“Awww, you’re the best sister ever,” Jase replied happily, following after her.

Katrina hadn’t been to this part of Ponyville before, but she had to assume with the way Applejack talked about her apples during the few times she met her, this was where she lived. It wasn’t long before they were heading into an orchard of apple trees, one that bore a tremendous amount of fruit.

“How do they pick all of this?” Jase asked as he looked around. “They don’t have hands and horses can’t climb. Do they just wait for them to fall to the ground? That seems ridiculously impractical.”

“I don’t know,” Katrina answered. “They have magic here though, so I assume they use that.”

“They have magic here, too?” he asked, sounding surprised. “That- I- no, I’m not ready to believe that. Now I know that that’s a lie.”

“We’re both ponies in an alternate universe, and yet you’re not ready to believe that magic exists?” she asked.

“Nope, my big truths limit is all used up for the week,” he responded. “You already told me you're trans and we broke the laws of reality. I won’t be accepting any more truths for the next three to five business days.”

“How do you think we got here?” she asked. “Twilight said she used magic to build that portal to turn us into this. I mean, if it breaks the laws of reality, it has to be magic, right? That’s what Arthur C. Clark would say.”

“And I’m gonna pretend that’s not true, and… eat this apple while I do it.” As he said it, he picked up a piece of fruit off the ground with his teeth, one that Katrina could see was obviously covered in dirt and a bit overripe.

“Don’t eat that,” she told him. “That looks gross, and you’re gonna end up getting sick.” He looked right at her, pausing for a dramatic moment before his teeth started to sink into it.

“For crying out loud, it’s covered in dirt!” she yelled at him. “What in the world is wrong with you?”

“What are you, my mom, Katrina?” he asked as he chewed. “Nothing in this world is wrong with me. I’m an adult. I can do what I want, and what I want is to eat this apple. Besides, I’m a horse. That means I shouldn’t mind a little dirt, right?”

“You are absolutely nasty, Jase. I can’t see how we can possibly be related. When you get sick, it’s gonna be your own fault.”

“When I get sick, it’s gonna be worth it, because this is the best apple I’ve ever eaten despite how soft and overripe it is. I know horses like apples, but I didn’t think it’d taste this amazing. You should try it.”

“No thank you,” she responded. “I don’t eat food off the ground. And I bet it didn’t taste as amazing as that casserole Spike cooked for me.”

“You had a casserole?” he asked. “How does a horse cook a casserole?” As he said it, he started to laugh hard at the idea, falling on his back in a fit. It got Katrina to laugh a little bit at how silly it sounded.

“Well, for your information, it was a dragon that cooked me that casserole,” she told him. “And you start by not putting dirt in it, for one.”

“Ah, okay, my mistake,” he responded jokingly as he got back up. “Since it was a dragon, I guess that means-”

“Can ya keep it down over there?” someone suddenly interrupted in a thick, Minnesotan accent. The two of them turned around to see who it was, only able to see a few animals in the distance. Pigs, cows, chickens- nothing that would speak to them, or so they thought.

“Creatures are tryin’ ta sleep, doncha know?” the cow closest to them said, catching both Katrina and Jase by surprise. “Don’t go makin’ a ruckus this late at night.”

“I- uh, sorry,” Katrina apologized awkwardly. “We, uh, didn’t know anyone was around this far out.”

“Doncha go stealin’ the Apple Family’s apples either,” she continued, sending a scowl Jase’s way. “They work plenty hard tendin’ ta this here orchard fer you ta go stealin’ things from them.”

“Well, it was on the ground, and overripe, so I assumed it was okay,” he said, blinking at the animal. “Also, you’re a cow.”

“Ya, course I am, what of it?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s just weird is all, the kind of weird thing I’d expect to see from an alien world,” he explained. “I mean, what does a horse need a cow for? Horses don’t eat meat, unless they do here. And if you can talk, why are you in a fenced area? Can chickens talk? What about the pigs? What’s the line between what’s a farm animal and a person if both horses and cows can talk, but one horse owns a castle?” He suddenly gasped as he asked, “Are you a slave? Do they have slavery here, Katrina? Why did you bring me to a slave world?”

“Calm down with ya!” the cow told him. “I ain’t a slave, and I’m offended ya would think so!”

“Then what are you?”

“I’m family, that’s what I am! Applejack and the Apples treat us like family. She feeds us and cares for us, and in return, we let her have our milk to make cheese and butter with.”

“But-”

“Now get on with ya, before ya go wakin’ up every creature on the farm!”

“So then you guys are farm animals, right?” he asked curiously. “This is a farm?”

“Get!” she demanded with a scowl, using a hoof to point in the direction they came. Reluctantly, they turned and began to walk back, but before they got far, Katrina spoke to the cow.

“Please tell Applejack I’m sorry for any trouble we might have caused. Especially my brother? He didn’t mean to offend you, he’s just not that smart.”

“Hey!”

“Well… I guess it’s alright. Just make sure he doesn’t go sayin’ those things again, ya hear? And I guess since yer oaf of a brother liked even the overripe apples on the ground, AJ won’t mind. Just don’t go buckin’ down apples, else there will be a problem.”

With that final thought, the two finally began to leave, heading back to the castle that was still in sight. It was only a minute or so until they were both out of earshot and Jase began to speak again.

“I can’t believe I was arguing with a cow,” he started. “And the cow won, somehow. This really is an alien world.”

“I can’t believe it either,” Katrina agreed, “but that’s what happens when you run off to random places.”

“How are there pigs on that farm though?” he asked, glancing back for a moment. “Horses don’t eat meat, and if all animals can talk here, then there’s no use for a pig on a farm at all. Cows make sense, and I guess chickens for their eggs maybe? But what does a pig do?”

“I don’t know. Maybe that dragon I met, Spike, eats pork? That would make sense but… I don’t know. Anyway, can we go back now? I do have to work at some point, as it turns out.”

“Yeah, we can go back. I don’t feel like arguing with some other farm animal today. Although it seems weird that horses are the superior race here. Are there any humans?”

“I don’t know. Twilight made it seem like there weren’t any, so that would be my bet.”

“This place is so weird. This day has been so weird. It’s like a dream. Are you sure there’s not a gas leak in your house and we’re not on the floor dying right now? It would explain why we turned into ponies and the gas leak could be convincing you that you’re a girl.”

“I am one hundred percent certain that that’s not happening. If it was, then I’ve been breathing in the gas for over fifteen years.”

“Well, you know I had to ask. You can never be too careful when your brother turns into your sister.” She flinched a bit at that as he continued, “Or hey! Since you’ve known for fifteen years, that means you’ve always been my sister, for at least most of my life anyway.”

“Well, if that were true, maybe I wouldn’t feel so bad about myself all the time,” she sighed. “But thank you for talking to me,” she quickly continued, smiling at him as they walked. “As nervous as I was, I feel a lot better now that you know, a lot more confident in myself. Thank you.”

“Awww, that’s what little brothers are for,” he smiled back. “I gotta protect my older sister.”

That statement made her blush and smile, letting herself enjoy the night as they walked back home.

Comments

[Chrome Masquerade]

“How are there pigs on that farm though?” he asked, glancing back for a moment. “Horses don’t eat meat, and if all animals can talk here, then there’s no use for a pig on a farm at all. Cows make sense, and I guess chickens for their eggs maybe? But what does a pig do?”

Wrong again.
Stop me if you've heard this one before (that is to say, if I've told you this one before), but...

[Forgoten Null]

11093239
I mean, pigs are also used to hunt for truffles and other buried goodies, as well as for their strong ability to convert pretty much anything you feed them into fertilizer (which other animals can do, but Pigs being exceptionally non-picky omnivores helps with that).

[Level Dasher]

11093263
One of the videos Chrome posted said exactly that— truffle hunting and fertilizer. I guess it would make sense to not have the pigs be sapient also if one of their main 'resources' was fertilizer, since I personally wouldn't want to go up to someone I take care of like a friend and ask them for their $#!+ in a bucket.

[Chatoyance]

Lauren Faust pointed out that the reason there were no bathrooms in the show was because ponies just pooped wherever, knowing that this made the grass and flowers grow. Pig poop would be high-grade industrial fertilizer, which could be marketed and sold for bits.

One truffle, in our world, could make as much as 90,000 dollars, though they average around 3700 bucks. Pigs hunting truffles could make the the difference, for Applejack and her family, between paying the rent, getting Granny and new hip, and affording paint for the barn just by themselves in a good year. If they ever one day found a truly primo truffle, it could change their very lives.

Pigs would be a constant moneymaker with the lottery-ticket probability of having a super-huge win. That is more than enough reason for ponies to keep pigs!

[Chrome Masquerade]

11093263
11093411

Though, as I understand, some dogs can also detect truffles... but are less likely to consume them once found.

[Hawkx1]

”But what does a pig do?”

They probably eat the stuff that nobody else would eat and the Apples also use the manure and in return the Apples care for them

[Ali della Morte]

11093682
They can get one of those things from the cows as well

[Luckyfanisaac]

“Calm down will ya!” the cow told him. “I ain’t a slave, and I’m offended ya would think so!”

[tsaukpaetra]

Turning tears into hurdles you only have to stumble over...