Really, Discord?
“You’re telling me this is supposed to be the future. One that has...machines and stuff.”
“Yeah. Since Cake-butt made you promise not to blow stuff up in Equestria within the next few centuries, I found you a way around that little problem. We’re not going to blow up anything within the next few centuries!”
“...I’m in. Raven, cancel all my appointments for the day!”
“Your Majesty, what-”
“BYEEEEEEEE!”
Twilight Accidentally Sets Off Sprout’s Nukes
Written by iAmSiNnEr
“I understand now. It's not the crystals that need to be brought together. It's us. We can bring back everything that was lost, but it's up to us. We can stay separated by fear and distrust, or we can choose friendship. We can choose love. That's the true magic.” Sunny looked at everyone.
Queen Haven stepped forwards first, before pushing one side of the picture frame towards the picture, and Sunny smiled. Alphabittle stepped forwards next, pushing yet another side of the frame in, connecting the cracked ends. Finally, Phyllis stepped forwards to push the last piece in, making a full frame.
All three ponies smiled at Sunny, and Sunny beamed back. It seemed as if everything would be alright.
Suddenly, the three crystals broke themselves free of the rubble, before lifting up into the air and spinning around Sunny. As they did so, they started ascending into the air, along with the orange earthpony. “Woah!” Sunny cried out in surprise.
Glowing wings appeared on Sunny’s back, and a glowing horn appeared on her head. The three crystals shot up into the sky, before joining together and shooting a blast of light up into the sky, creating an aurora.
Everyone cheered and shouts of surprise could be heard as pegasi lifted up into the air. “We’re actually flying!” Pipp exclaimed as she flapped her wings.
Everypony stopped their celebrations and wild flying maneuvers when Sunny began to be lifted up by the recently returned magic. Up, higher and higher, the shining light carried her, growing brighter, ever brighter. And then, at the highest point yet, above even the former height of her lighthouse, Sunny raised her head and, in a great release of light…
...she exploded.
"BOOYAH!", a booming voice exclaimed. “Take that, mysterious alicorn! That’s your introduction to alicornhood!”
“Discord, what the buck?!” A female voice shouted from behind the group. “You do not just blow any alicorn up! That’s not even-”
Sunny dropped out of the sky, steaming and smoking. “Oops.” the voice said as a weird creature popped into existence and snapped his fingers. A mattress appeared below Sunny, and she fell onto it.
“Anddddd quick-fix!” The weird creature snapped his fingers again, and Sunny’s coat was no longer blackened, back to its usual orange hue. The mare groaned and lifted up her head weakly.
“What...hit me?” Sunny muttered.
“I did!” The weird creature replied gleefully. “Also, what have you ponies been doing the past few centuries? I couldn’t even access this plane of time until this certain period! Where did all the magic go-”
“Discord,” A lavender alicorn landed onto the ground. “Apologise.”
“Fine,” The creature named Discord huffed, before looking at Sunny. “I’m sorry.” He said, not sincerely. “But you’ll be fine. Alicorns are made outta tough things.”
“Those are magical constructs, Discord,” the alicorn chastised. “She’s not an actual alicorn-”
“Who are you two?” Izzy grinned and asked. “You just, boom, bang, pop, appeared outta nowhere!”
“You’re not mad at us?” The lavender alicorn blinked.
“Well, you did blow Sunny up,” Izzy shrugged. “But you fixed her! So I guess that’s all good!”
“I’m fine, thanks for asking,” Sunny muttered, her face buried in the mattress.
“Name’s Stars,” The alicorn winked. “Just a quick visit for me. Just a quick question - where did that giant machine of doom come from?”
“From the Canterlogic Factory,” Sprout said proudly. “I made it!”
“I see,” The alicorn nodded. “Be right back. Discord, behave yourself.” She vanished in a flash of light.
“So,” Discord examined his claws. “Why couldn’t I access Equestria’s future until this time? What did you ponies do to the magic?”
“We didn’t have any magic!” Izzy announced proudly.
“No magic?” Discord frowned.
“Nope!” Izzy replied cheerfully. “Oh, but if it makes you feel any better, we did have it, but that was many, many, many moons ago. It just – poof – disappeared!”
“Andddd, done,” Stars announced as she popped back into existence in front of them. “The factory’s rigged to blow. I’ll set it off when you give me the word, Discord.”
“Wait-” Sprout blinked. “The Canterlogic Factory?”
“Onwards with the explosions!” Discord had a pirate hat on suddenly, and a wooden sword in his paw. “BOOM!”
Stars grinned, and her horn flashed.
“B-but,” Sprout protested. “My nuclear warheads are inside that factory!”
“Your what?!” Stars exclaimed, glancing at Sprout. “Celestia damn it-” In the distance, a large explosion could be heard, before the world went white as it shook and trembled. Was it her imagination, or did Izzy see a flash of purple light before the world went white?
When the group came around, they looked at each other weirdly.
“Why did we all just suddenly pass out?” Sunny frowned.
“I dunno,” Izzy shrugged.
“Mommy,” Sprout nudged Phyllis. “Why is the Canterlogic Factory a steaming crater?”
Phyllis turned slowly. “WHAT?!”
“Pfeh,” Discord lounged on a couch. “If that’s the future, I ain’t looking forward to that.”
Twilight sighed. “They have nukes there? Celestia dammit, I didn’t expect them to have invented nukes by that point. How far did we go? A thousand years?”
“Somewhere around there,” Discord agreed. “Hey, since we’re still here, let’s just do something that turns this world into the alternate universe and creates a second timeline for this system.”
“We already erased their memories and you wanna do more?” Twilight asked incredulously. “We’re already lucky I was fast enough to make a dome around the factory so the nukes wouldn’t kill everyone!”
“Pfeh,” Discord shrugged. “It’s just gonna create a branch-off timeline. The main one will be just fine.”
Twilight sighed, before shrugging. “Eh, sure. Who do we blow up?”
“Why, the villain, of course!”
“He barely even counts as a villain.”
“Do it anyways.”
“What happened to the factory, Mommy-?” Sprout’s question was cut off as he suddenly blew up.
“What in the phoney pony full of baloney-?!"
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Oh, I SO hope this will turn out to be true...
Silly Twilight, you can time travel and be back immediately after leaving!
Its good to see Lavender dynamite still kicking, tho i wonder how in the seven hells did Celestia talk Twiligt into not blowing more stuff up?
God damn it Sin.
Well done, you magnificent nephew of mine.
I approve of the branching timelines. Makes quite a lot of sense. Poor Sprout though. And poor Canterlogic. That was the primary source of jobs!
But it's not like Twilight cares. Blowing things up is her prerogative. I wonder what's next. Going back in time far enough to blow up a few Gen 1 villains?
Sprout gets blown up, I'm on board with that!
Screw it. it's my thing now.
Mat(le dude): OH COME ON! I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH BLOWING HOLES IN ANOTHER DIMENSION!!
I wonder what's next? Going to various alternate Equestrias created by fanfic authors and Starlight Glimmer and blow up those worlds?
Absolutely magnificent and a great addition to your series of crazed Twilight goodness! Just can't ever get enough of this! Hope ya didn't mind but I couldn't resist making a reading of this nuclear fic of yours!
Audio Linkyloo!: https://youtu.be/6L7WaLF1O0E
(I don't mean to offend anyone with this comment in any way!)
Dude... Lmao the title alone made me laugh, and the story... Lol that was pure comedy gold, the only thing this is missing and is a nitpick is that there's no Luna in the story
11036418
Now that's a nickname, a series name and a group name for this series
11036761
glad you like it
I, for one, welcome our anachronistic, explosive overlords.
That gratuitous blowing up at the looked like a finger poke of doom. And that was great.
There can only be one
Seriously though, for a brief second I thought my profile pic was on the feature page
11036870
The two Sunnys are staring at each other in shock
How can I ever repay you?
11036986
I would be shocked too if I saw a clone of myself
11037254
media.discordapp.net/attachments/653919425539473418/905294281214930944/unknown.png?width=251&height=662
BYE BYE SPROUT!
11036418
I would assume it involved a lot of begging, lectures, and massive guilt trips.
11037511
might work tho i take it mostly guilt tripping for i am not sure how well the first two will work, might be how she controls Luna as well
11037525
I was thinking the first two would wear her down just based on how much time they would consume. You can only listen to a moral lecture for so long before you start questioning what it will take to make it stop.
11037532
ah alright i can see how that might work
11037511
It also included a lot of reminding that she had responsibilities + a lot of guilt tripping that she blew a lot of stuff up that needed her to fix
11037538
One thing I'll always love on this series is the comment section chaos
It looks like Twilight and Discord are still having a "blast" together!
Hey, no one else used that pun yet, so someone had to make it
Do it... more... G5 needs to burn more.
So every thing that went wrong was cake butbutt's fault. If she had not stop twilight, from blowing stuff up, friendship would still be around?
Just when I think it's all over, they pull me back in again.
Nice job.
11036418
Ditto on the “Lavender Dynamite” name for the series — it’s perfect!
11039005
"Silly Twilight, you can time travel and be back immediately after leaving!"
But Gastredner, to quote Discord, "Where's the fun in that?"
11039005
Actually... if you buy a game, it belongs to you. It's yours, and you are free to play it, give it away, poop on it, blow it up, stuff it in a blender when you realize you bought the wrong game...
Point is, once something is yours, it's free game. She can legally blow the whole kingdom up now if she wanted to, since it's her property. And if the Nobles complain about it, she can just blow them up, too!
Prince Blueblood steps into the room and grins at Twilight, holding an Engagement Ring.
Twilight blows Blueblood up.
But, why is there a phoney pony full of baloney?
Up next....
IT'S TWILIGHT SPARKLE PRIME VS. LAVENDER DYNAMITE AKA TWILIGHT "THE EXPLOSIVES ADDICT" SPARKLE!
11036471
or twilight start blowing up heaven or the afterlife
no place is safe
The End.
Yup, certainly sounds like Izzy.
11037254
But how can you be who of you two is the original?