• Member Since 2nd Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Tuesday

River Road


Writing Comedy, Adventure and Slice Of Life. Desperately trying to keep up with all the crazy stories my brain comes up with.

E

Alphabittle grew up on stories of Bridlewood before the loss of magic. Against an overwhelming atmosphere of dark and dreary depression, there's only so much a single pony can do. But you can still do it and hope that one day it will be enough.

Written for FanOfMostEverything's Imposing Sovereigns III contest for the Perseverance prompt.

Art by Sursiq

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 24 )

Interesting way of fleshing Aplhabittle out. I like it. :eeyup:

Dan

"By the way, Mom. I'm dating a queen."

That's a hillcanon I'll die on.
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Wow, this was great. Alphabittle really is a deep character, and I appreciate someone finally writing his story.


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Well said.

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Glad to hear you liked it, this is a story that needed to be told.

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The funniest part of combining these two headcanons imo is that the most laid-back and supportive mother in the setting has her son marrying into royalty while the literal child beauty pageant mom ends up with the guy who combined running a teahouse with being the town's only basement-dwelling geek.

(If anyone thinks I used 'literal' wrong in that sentence, tell me to my face that Queen Haven didn't organize at least one child beauty pageant just so Pipp could end up winning it and that it wasn't entirely justified and deserved)

“We have these three kinds of tea. If you know any other flavor of tea, do enlighten me. Otherwise take what we have or shut up.”

That one... that line hurt. Just watching Alphabittle slowly lose so much joy over the course of the story...

And then watching Izzy bring some of it back. Absolutely perfect.

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I think that line came out a little harsher than intended. There was a scrapped bit of context in another part of the story about how most tea was imported to Bridlewood and that's why they didn't have any variety anymore, but it didn't fit in anywhere.
You're not wrong, though, and I'm glad if it added that extra bit of punch to the story for you.

Now this is what I’m talking about! I was really hoping someone would do an Alphabittle entry for the Imposing Sovereigns III contest. I even wanted to myself, but couldn’t get an actual story out of my vague “I want this to happen” notes for him. Thankfully I got much inspiration, to my utter surprise, for Phyllis instead. And with two other people having done Queen Haven fics for the contest, that means all three leaders/figureheads of the pony tribes in the film are represented. Can’t judge my own, but I really like all the other three, and that includes this one. Joy!

The funny thing is, even though I find the late-game revisions to the Alphabittle sequence in the film painfully obvious (he was originally blind, a unicorn sage, and more of a wild, kooky, zen-type character, and the Mane 5 visited him in a cave connected to the Tea Room - it’s hard to be certain of the rest from the colour script), leaving scars over that chunk of the film, and that the dance game scene is a tonal misfire, far too late for a light breezy thing like that and causing tonal whiplash when things escalate moments later… I still quite like Alphabittle as a character. Part of that is his design and voice acting/energy (you can’t go wrong with a voice acting legend like Phil LaMarr - I wonder if them getting a non-commercial VA is because the late revisions to his character meant they didn’t have time to go through the audition process for someone more famous). But part of it is certainly that, as you note, if one wants to, one can easily infer quite a bit of depth with him.

Now, I wouldn’t say I agree personally with every observation you made, but even where I didn’t, you made your take work for this story. The elements already in my personal headcanon (primarily Alphabittle having a soft spot for Izzy and looking out for her throughout the years - I even had a scrapped fic idea of him dissuading her from setting off to Bridlewood when she first found the message too!), it was so great to see your personal take on them. Being a gamer with a soft side for trying to improve the moods of other unicorns was a neat master stroke - I even bought into him throwing a game occasionally for the benefit of his opponent.

Possibly the most impressive element of this story is the face pace achieved by the time lapse, and how that colours the change in his mood back and forth as the story progresses. It reads like a memory piece, with minimal scene descriptions that are not essential, and the quick scene changes, especially during the montages, meant I felt the 7.3K word count. But, I WANTED to feel it - this is a dense, rich story, making the most out of just about every word. Even the non-essential asides (“It’s Alright” being an old record from just before the unicorns got all depressed, the Beatnik Unicorn being basically Maud Reincarnated, etc.) ultimately DO matter - they give a sense of other events that we don’t see, adding some progression. It is the kind of story that I read at a slower rate then normal, savouring every scene, and that’s very rare on a first read.

As far as quiet little prequel character pieces from the film go (which is the kind of G5 fic I’m finding is producing the best quality thus far - at least, I’ve found a good few gems), this one’s got the goods, buddy. Well done!

“Novelty cereal boxes, duh!”

GRINDED PONY HOOVES

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The background is pony music montage magic. The box is all Izzy.

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Wow, thank you for that long feedback. :twilightblush:
I'm glad you enjoyed the story and really glad that the format worked out so well. I'll definitely have to read your entry as well when I have some time on the weekend.

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We need more Havenbittle!

Dan

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It seems https://derpibooru.org/search?q=alphahaven has become the accepted shipmanteau.

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Would you please tell me what Block's comment was all about?

Oh, this is outstanding. Great work in fleshing out Alphabittle in an eminently logical way. I don't know what I love more, crystal berries making it south from the Empire before it was lost again, Maud's poetry style surviving to the next generation, the implications of "card pegasus..." There are so many wonderful little details slipped into the overarching tale of a family maintaining the light of hope through a disenchanted dark age. And that tale is itself delightful in its own right. Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.

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My personal favorite song in the movie has a solo from Hitch (starts at 1:08) that includes a line about grinding up hooves into midnight snacks, complete with Izzy's adorable visual demonstration in the background.

Very nice; thanks. :)

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Thank you for this, and best of luck in the judging.

Well, it's certainly a good sign when the one leading the contest calls your story outstanding. :scootangel:

I'm glad that you had as much fun with my take on Alphabittle as I had with writing it. And that I can as always count on you to spot all those little references and pieces of worldbuilding between the lines. Considering they went from the polar North to the Southern coast, those berries might technically be the most far-spread species on the Equorum Continent.

That was a great piece of Alphabittle lore/backstory! I don't have much to say that hasn't already been said, but it's great how you show off Alphabittle's subtle fall from joyful grace... only to come back up again once in a while (save for the epilogue).

Thanks for it!

Howdy, hi!

This was amazing. Of the entire batch of G5 fics thus far that I have been released, this is definitely at the top of my list for best. I love how you characterized Alphabittle in this. He is such a fun character and I adore all the little moments you put into the fic. Izzy is a bundle of sunshine, and I like how she bounces off of Alphabittle in this.

This was just such a fun story that really fleshes out his character in such an amazing way. Thanks for the read~!

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Thank you for your comment. I'm glad you enjoyed the story as much as I did writing it. Once I started thinking about Alphabittle this idea kept growing and I had to share it. I'm really happy that people like this headcanon for him. :twilightsmile:

She tapped her muzzle. “Although ‘mayonnaise’ seems very silly even for that. I never did find out how that ended up on that list.”

“Silverspur said it’s because ma… the m-word, is made from eggs, and that’s the reason the pegasususes stole our magic.”

“Did she now? Well, I suppose it doesn’t make any less sense than any other explanation I’ve thought of.”

love how this is also exactly how i feel about the explanation. and nice use of “pegasusususes”

But most unicorns took it really hard, and never really got over that, and now not even the children know how to have fun and be happy. I think that’s the most important thing. Once ponies here remember how to be happy, then we can think about magic.”

aww, thus explaining the strange listlessness the Bridlewood unicorns were stuck in!

“Sometimes all ponies need is a little bittle of sunshine to brighten their day.”

“Moooooom!” Alpha blushed and squirmed, trying to hide under the covers. “Don’t say it like that, that’s embarrassing!”

yay title drop! 

“I think it’s nice. And I know that you always brighten up my day. As long as I have you, I know that I’ll always remember how to be happy.” She smiled and turned off the lights, slowly and quietly closing the door.

Alphabittle slowly poked his head out from under his blanket, yawning as the room settled into darkness and mumbling into his pillow. “G’dnight, mom. Love you…”

this really reminds me of the early scene in the movie between Sunny and Argyle… very heartwarming, with the possibility of becoming very heartbreaking

She hummed and pulled a purplish blue crystal out of a small separate box, along with its little metal stand.

ooooooh

Nopony noticed and even if they did I don’t think they cared, but… I always felt like it was something more. Like there was a tiny bit of that thing that everything else in this town lost still left inside this one.”

really like the backstory filling-in this is doing so far! the fact that Alphabittle’s character doesn’t really quite match running a tea shop of all things, the jinxies, the super special unicorn crystal just being a random decoration, all of it makes a lot more sense than what the movie left us with

“See? Just a bit of sunshine and it becomes something magical.”

“Bing Bong!” Alphabittle twitched, then glared. “You did that on purpose.”

not saying “little bittle” here feels very deliberate on her part, too! and there’s something great about Alphabittle’s mom being the one to guard and pass on the old ways and knowledge in the face of new superstitions and decay, just all of it in this exchange

“This one came out the year I was born. Sadly there wasn’t much of a market for it soon after because of… well, you know. I didn’t think I’d ever find a copy of it again after I lost mine.”

great touch! of course the dancing game needs a backstory as well

The filly blinked, then shook her head. “No, the other thing! The one next to it!”

He paused and blinked, slowly putting the crystal down again and moving his hoof to the side, picking up the crystal-studded yoyo. “...this one?”

ahaha classic fakeout, love it

“Losing and winning are parts of the game. But the important thing should always be having fun.” He stepped onto his own pad again, smiling down at her lightly. “Don’t think so hard about winning. Try to relax and just enjoy yourself. That’s what fun is all about.”

augh love him passing down his mother’s spirit

She nodded a little, tongue sticking out in concentration as she focused on her yoyo technique. “Okay, Mister Alphabittle. I’m Izzy!”

yay, i knew it was her! she’s not like the other unicorns because of Alphabittle’s influence, perfect

“Crystal.
You are a crystal.
Smooth. And hard. Like a rock.
But you’re a crystal.
Crystal.”

glad that Maud’s spirit is also living on

“I haven’t! Buuuut… they sent me a letter!” She pulled out a piece of parchment and unfolded it to show a crayon drawing. “See here? It says I have friends in Maretime Bay! Wherever that is. And they want me to visit them!”

ooh, getting Izzy’s side of that story, love it!

I know it’s probably not going to see much use but here’s hoping, right? I know at least one filly who’s probably going to love it.”

augh, perfectly explaining why the depressed unicorns even have a playground in the first place

“Advertisement? For the business I’m running? What do you need an hour with a cardboard printer for?”

“Novelty cereal boxes, duh!”

ahahahaha oh this is perfect! of course that box was personally created by Izzy in service of a bit!

“Oh yes, absolutely. It’s about time the other ponies her age figured out what a little bundle of sunshine she is.” He chuckled, then paused and frowned. “...huh. Had the weirdest sense of deja vu there. Oh well.”

aww, he’s becoming his mother!

“Not much letting her win involved these days, that filly is one hay of a card pegasus.

love that this is the unicorns’ version of “card shark”

“Moooom, not that again…”

“Everypony needs a little bittle of sunshine to brighten up their day. And as far as I’m concerned that filly is as much a bittle as you and me.”

yaaaaaay title callback!

It honestly answered a lot of questions about where the kid had been the last days. Leave it to Izzy to find a group of unicorns living outside town that nopony else had ever heard of.

ahaha love getting this from Alphabittle’s perspective. also Izzy being Izzy does explain why he’s not suspicious of the scenario at all!

Alphabittle is a much deeper character than it seems if you think about it. I did think about it way too much and I made a blog post with a list of all the things I found between the lines.

yes there are so many fascinating little details that could mean so much, and wow did this story squeeze a lot of juice out of them! just loved it!

Bittle Boop smiled back at him, tears building at the corners of her eyes and magic sparking as she wrapped it around her son to pull him into a hug, both of them leaning into each other.

“I told you, didn’t I? A little Bittle of sunshine is all it takes, sometimes.”

i love iiiiiiit

(There is no clear description of her because I honestly couldn't decide on a specific design and didn't really think about it in the first place. She's the warmest smile in Bridlewood, soft hugs and good advice and a cutie mark of sharing love through pony boops. I feel like that's all you need to know to know how she looks.)

beautiful and perfect. thank you so much for this wonderful story!

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very heartwarming, with the possibility of becoming very heartbreaking

Only good feelings here, no Disney moms.

ahaha classic fakeout, love it

:heart:

Thank you so so so much for that massive comment! I'm glad you enjoyed the story and really happy that all those different little bit(tle)s of my headcanon backstory caught your attention.

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And thank you for the wonderful comments.

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