• Published 11th Sep 2012
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Cry for Eternity - asylum1388



After Celestia's death, Twilight must take on a role she is woefully underprepared for.

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Chapter 23

Author's Note:

Alright, this hasn't quite cleared editing, but I wanted to get it up before EFNW, so I'm posting it now anyway.

Last chapter of this arc, and probably the one I'm most proud of.

Also, Piquo helped immensely with the last part, since I've never written a scene like that before.


GO HERE!

Pre-readers: PiquoPie, and f0xhole.

Five years since the coronation of Princess Twilight Sparkle.

“Then it’s settled,” Twilight proclaimed, stamping the scroll in front of her. “Starting next fiscal year, Equestria’s tariffs will be increased by an additional two-percent and all additional funds generated will be applied to making badly-needed upgrades to our ports.”

A murmur of agreement rang through the hall and Twilight glanced at the massive clock hanging behind her. “Well, it’s getting late, everypony. Is there anything else anypony would like to discuss before the budget is finalized?”

“I have something!” a unicorn mare shouted from next to the podium.

“Fiscal Fanatic... what a surprise,” Twilight groaned. “Would this have anything to do with restoring the revoked mining subsidies? The ones that I mathematically proved were actually doing more to damage the economy than to benefit it?”

“Well, yes, but—”

“Request denied,” Twilight said blandly. “Inevitable objection overruled. I’ll hear no more of it.”

“B-but, Princess, I—”

Twilight slapped a hoof on the podium. “You’ve been pestering me about that for months, and I’m tired of hearing it. One more word and I’ll have you held in contempt.”

“You can’t—”

“Bailiff?” Twilight interrupted. A burly Earth Pony guard approached and gave her a quick bow. “Lady Fiscal here is in contempt of this council. Please escort her off of the castle grounds. If, however, she says another word while still on the property, you are to take her into custody and hold her overnight.”

Fiscal Fanatic mouthed angrily at her for a moment, then shot the bailiff a nervous glance before quickly trotting away. Twilight glanced around again. “Anypony have something reasonable?”

She glanced around slowly, looking at each pony assembled. “No? In that case, I declare this meeting adjourned. Let the record show 8:45 PM.” She banged a gavel on the podium and trotted away through a small door at the back of a hall, where she was quickly joined by Quill-Pen.

“I’d say that went well. They even passed that tax credit you and Luna wanted, and all you had to do was give up a small chunk of your stipend,” the aging unicorn started happily.

“A twenty-five percent cut is small? Remind me of that next time we’re discussing your pay,” Twilight grumbled.

“You wouldn’t dare. You need me too much,” Quill-Pen giggled, eliciting an eyeroll from Twilight.

“All jokes aside, I can’t tell you how relieved I am,” Twilight sighed. “Though I’m not looking forward to Luna gloating about it.”

“I do have a question though, how’d you end up running the budget council two years in a row?” Quill-Pen asked. “I figured the two of you would take turns.”

“Because the bit came up heads,” Twilight grumbled.

“Seriously? You two flipped a coin over it?” Quill-Pen gasped incredulously.

“Yep. I wanted to play chess over it, but Luna wouldn’t fall for that,” Twilight snickered.

Quill-Pen shook her head as they came to a side hallway. “I can’t say I approve, but as long as one of you shows up every year, I suppose I shouldn’t complain.” She glanced down the side hall and gave Twilight a bow. “Well, I better go file the minutes. Enjoy your night.”

Twilight returned her bow with a nod and trotted away to her chambers.

Twilight pushed open the door and smiled. “How’d I know you’d be waiting for me here?”

Luna whipped her head around with a gasp and gave Twilight her largest grin. “Twilight! Finally!” She leapt off of the bed and quickly crossed the room, grabbing Twilight by the hoof.

“They agreed to follow your plan, just like you said they would,” she said with an exaggerated sigh. “I’m guessing you’re so excited because now’s the part where you say ‘I told you so’?”

“No. Well, yes I did tell you, but that’s not it! I have something to show you,” Luna replied rapidly. Panting excitedly she dragged Twilight across the room and shoved her out onto the balcony, shutting the curtains before closing the door behind them. She sat down next to Twilight and pointed towards the sky. “Thirty degrees, ten minutes east. Altitude, twenty-five degrees.”

Twilight gave her a questioning glance before looking into the sky herself. “Thirty east, twenty-five up... Oh my!” She gasped, her jaw dropping at the new star shimmering brightly in the heavens. “Luna, that- when did you put that one in there?”

Regulae Flebitae, The Sovereign's Lament. I’ve been working on it for years, but tonight is its first,” Luna said proudly. “It is, without the shadow of a doubt, my greatest work.”

“It’s certainly one of the brightest,” Twilight mused. She lay down on the balcony and got comfortable, motioning for Luna to join her. “So, are you going to tell me the story behind this one? That is, if you don’t mind skipping over the rest for now.”

“I think I would actually prefer to tell you of the star itself,” Luna giggled, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. Twilight raised a questioning eyebrow at her, but she simply turned her gaze back towards the sky. “Right now, it is, as you can see, the purest white, but it will not remain so. It will slowly, over the next two months, dull into a soft yellow, and then over the next two, into a fiery orange. From there, it will shift once again, intensifying into a heated pink, its heat slowly increasing until finally it burns its brightest at a bold blue. Finally, on the eve of the summer solstice, it will fade into a beautiful shade of violet— again, for two months, before shifting to white once more. And the cycle will continue year after year, until the sun dies and the stars shine no more.”

“Y-you made it for me. For our friends and I,” Twilight choked. Trembling, she turned to Luna and gave her a quick squeeze,

“I did,” Luna breathed. “You— all of you— have changed not just my life, but me, myself. If I were to meet the pony I was before my banishment, she would hardly recognize me. If even one of you had been around back then, things likely would have turned out much differently— much better.”

Twilight smiled at her sympathetically at her, struggling to find adequate words. “Better late than never?”

“Yes, yes I suppose,” Luna chuckled softly. She glanced towards the sky again sighing heavily. “You know, the night it happened was not unlike this one. Warm and balmy, with not a cloud in sight. In fact, it was quite pleasant.”

“Luna...” Twilight breathed, her heart sinking. Nothing good could come from Luna’s thoughts turning down this road.

“Equestria, however was not so pleasant. We had entered the twenty-fourth year of a terrible famine, and we were clueless as to why. The weather hadn’t changed, there was no blight or plague; the crops just would not grow.” She paused, pursing her lips thoughtfully. “We were— Celestia and I, that is— losing hope, and we were each handling it in our own way. I spent nearly all of my time among the populace; trying to keep spirits up and provide aid in whatever ways I could. ‘Tia, on the other hoof threw herself snout-first into trying to find a solution.”

“L-luna, you don’t have to do this,” Twilight said softly, pleadingly, but Luna only gave her a patronizing smile, turned away, and continued.

“There were times where I would go weeks without seeing her. I missed her terribly, but I managed by reminding myself that Equestria needed me,” she whispered with another sigh. “Then, all of a sudden, things changed. A rumor had begun in a small village in an isolated province.”

“What were they saying?” Twilight asked, not really wanting to know the answer.

“They were saying that the reason for the crop failures was because they weren’t getting enough sun. They somehow came to the conclusion that if the night were to be abolished, it would end the famine,” Luna murmured. She glanced back at Twilight and snorted at the bewildered and horrified expression on the younger princess’ face. “A preposterous idea, I know, but to angry and frightened ponies seeking someone to blame, it made perfect sense. Within a week, the idea had taken root among my courtiers.”

“What did they do?” Twilight whispered. “D-did they attack you?”

“Not physically,” she mumbled slowly. “They began much more subtly, not bowing or addressing me by name instead of by my title. Things that seem little now, but back then they were akin to a slap in the face. Of course, I knew why they were insulting me so; I had heard of the rumor myself, but that didn’t make it any easier.”

She raised her head, locking her eyes on the moon. “After putting up with it for a few days, I went to Celestia. I knocked on the door of her... study? I don’t actually know what she had in there, but she stuck her head out and asked me why I was bothering her. When I explained my predicament, she told me that I was making a big deal of nothing and that things would get better. I believed her.”

Twilight put a hoof around Luna’s withers as a tear formed in the corner of the moon princess’ eye.

“But things did not get better,” Luna sniffed. “Things progressed from mere snubs to outright hostility. The nobles would interrupt me when I was speaking and the servants would ignore my requests. Whenever I went to visit a town, I was met with sneers and even had things thrown at me on one occasion.”

Twilight stammered, struck speechless. She opened her mouth to say something, but couldn’t. She shook her head and pulled Luna in, cuddling the crying mare to her chest.

“A-after a new more weeks, things finally came to a head on that awful night. A sizable group of ponies arrived at Night Court to present a petition. They... they demanded that I step down, and that the day be made eternal,” Luna wheezed.

“L-luna, I...”

“They didn’t even have the decency to be cowardly about it by presenting it to my sister,” she choked out. “They walked right into my court, heads held high, and presented it to me. I was livid. I screamed at them and ordered the guards to arrest them. As the group was being dragged out, their leader yelled that my moon and I were ‘Equestria’s nightmare.’”

“Oh no. Luna,” Twilight whispered, covering her mouth with her hoof.

“Yes,” Luna whispered with a nod. “After they were arrested, I retired to my chambers and tore them apart. I seethed, and raged, and screamed for hours, a-and something finally snapped. I-I emerged, went down into the dungeons and found the mob’s leader...”

A feeling of dread rapidly grew in Twilight chest. “Y-you...”

“I greeted him, introducing myself as Nightmare Moon, then I pulled him out of his cell, dragged him up to the Throne Room and I-I...” she cut herself off with a sob, her tears flowing freely now. “I hurt him, Twilight. Celestia... she felt the dark magic flowing from me and came as quick as she could, b-but she got there too late. H-he was gone.”

Twilight flinched at the revelation, gibbering for a moment before stuttering, “L-luna, I don’t know what to say...”

“Do you know what the worst part is? I don’t even remember him. I don’t remember his name, or even what he looked like,” she whimpered. “For all I know, one of his descendants could be the one serving me tea every morning, completely unaware of what I did to their ancestor.”

Twilight closed her eyes, trying in vain to ward off the burning sensation. She pulled Luna in closer, resting her chin on Luna’s head. Luna gave a hard sob and buried her face in Twilight’s neck before finally breaking down.

After several agonizing minutes, Luna began wearing down; her sobs becoming softer. Before long, she stopped completely and lay trembling in Twilight’s embrace.

“It’s okay, Luna. I’m here for you,” Twilight murmured, giving Luna a reassuring squeeze.

“I know. Thank you,” Luna sighed, sniffing back more tears. She paused, staring off into space for a few seconds and continued, “Y-you know the rest of the story. When Celestia entered the throne room, I attacked her despite her attempts to reason with me. In my rage I was able to overpower her and she was forced to harness the elements, and I was banished as a result.” She stopped, looking up at Twilight with a sad smile. “S-so there you have it. The whole story.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” Twilight murmured.

“No, no, I did. As awful as reliving those events is, it feels good to have finally opened up,” Luna replied with a hiccup.

“What was it like? Being banished?” Twilight wondered softly, not daring to look Luna in the eye as she asked.

“Cold,” Luna whispered, hanging her head and staring into the distance. “Cold and dark; but far worse than either was the solitude. I was completely alone with my thoughts. I-I turned to anger almost immediately, for it was far easier to live with than was remorse, but I wish I hadn’t. I wish I had been stronger, for the hate chipped away at my very soul and I fell into madness.”

“So when you said you lost control of yourself, you meant it literally?”

“Yes. I had no control, or awareness even, of the actions I took against you. During my banishment, the insanity brought on by my loneliness combined with my rage to take on a life of its own. I had no way of sensing the passage of time, so I cannot tell you how long it took, but at some point, I ceased to be and the monster you fought arose in my stead,” Luna sighed. “I don’t really remember much beyond that. Everything is just a blur of anger and darkness.”

“I can’t imagine how that’d feel. A thousand years just gone from my memory?” Twilight whimpered. “L-luna, I’m so sorry. I don’t care what you did, nopony deserves that.”

“Maybe, but perhaps it is also a mercy. For the first thing that I remember clearly is lying on the cold floor of my destroyed castle; you were standing over me, and the darkness was gone,” Luna murmured, glancing at Twilight with a thankful smile.

“Well, I had help...” Twilight whispered sheepishly.

“You did, but in the end, it was still you who led your friends,” Luna nodded. She glanced back up towards her newest star, “And there is nothing that I can do to fully repay all of you.”

Twilight stared at Luna for a moment before putting a hoof below Luna’s chin, turning Luna’s head towards her, and pressing her lips firmly against the elder princess’. She pulled away with a satisfied smirk, but her elation waned when she saw the stunned expression on Luna’s face. “Luna? Luna, what’s wrong?”

Luna gaped, eyes unfocused, into space for a few seconds before shaking herself out of her stupor. “N-nothing! Nothing is wrong, Twilight. You have never initiated a kiss like that before. You just surprised me.”

“Well, I... I know how awful reliving that night is for you, and opening up the way you did, trusting me like that... It really means a lot to me and I just couldn’t think of any other way to show my appreciation.”

“I see...” Luna murmured, looking away for a second. “To be honest, it was never about you, Twilight. It was about me; my shame. I have always trusted you enough to tell you, I was just always too humiliated by my past to share it.”

Twilight smiled at her and gave her a quick peck on the lips. “That doesn’t change anything.”

Luna closed her eyes and sighed contently, savoring the fleeting touch. “I love you, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight recoiled, choking on her words. “I... I’m trying, Luna.”

Luna stared quizzically at her reaction for a moment before giggling softly. “You do not need to try, Twilight, I am perfectly happy the way things are.”

“But sometimes I feel like I’m leading you on. I—” Twilight began to ramble before Luna stopped her by gently pressing her hoof to Twilight’s lips.

“The act of ‘leading me on’, as you call it, requires deception. I am under no illusions about our relationship, therefore you have not deceived me,” Luna cooed. She snickered at the skeptical frown Twilight gave her and continued, “Let’s approach this from a different angle. You may not harbor strong romantic feelings towards me the way I do for you, but you do love me, don’t you?”

“Of course I do! You know that,” Twilight said confidently.

“Well that is enough,” Luna replied with a nod. “Despite our busy schedules, you make time for me whenever possible; and despite feeling no sexual attraction towards me, you cuddle with me regularly and allow me to plaster you with my affections whenever the desire strikes me.” She smiled sincerely at Twilight. “What more can I reasonably ask of you?”

“Well, when you put it that way...” Twilight mumbled sheepishly, glancing away with a blush.

“Twilight, you invest a massive amount of time and effort into making me happy,” Luna continued, leaning forward and placing her hoof on Twilight’s. “The least I can do to repay your efforts is to actually be happy.”

Tears began welling up in Twilight’s eyes. She opened her mouth to reply, but her words failed her. Instead, she pulled Luna into a deep kiss, firmly pressing their lips together. Luna gave a surprised squeal and tensed for the briefest moment before releasing it with a soft sigh. Moaning contently, Luna put her hooves around Twilight’s neck and pulled her closer. With a giggle, Twilight shoved Luna onto her back, jumped on top of her, and pulled her in for another long kiss before standing back up, leaving Luna panting on the floor.

The Night Princess stared up at her bewilderedly. “T-twilight, I did not ex— Eep!” She was cut off as Twilight grabbed her hoof and pulled her into a standing position, leading her back inside. She climbed up onto her bed and plopped down, giving Luna a smile.

Luna was awestruck. She slowly stepped up to the bed and climbed on, lying several hoof-lengths away from Twilight. “T-twilight, are you sure? You really wish to lay with me?”

Twilight didn’t speak, just responding with a nod.

Luna hung her head, staring down at the bedsheets with a frown. “No.”

“What?” Twilight stammered, completely dumbfounded by Luna’s answer. She scooted closer, desperately grabbing at Luna’s hoof.

“I said no. I am not going through with this; not tonight,” Luna stated firmly with a shake of her head.

“B-b-but why?” Twilight whined, blinking back tears. “I thought you wanted this...”

“Because I want— I need you to understand how I feel,” Luna sighed. “I do want you, more than I can express, but not because I lust for you. I want you because I love you with every fiber of my being. And when I bed you, I want it to be because you want me to, not because you know I want to. I am willing to wait however long that takes.”

“B-but I—”

“Twilight, I don’t want you to pretend to like mares just to satisfy my desires. If we were to make love, I would want you to enjoy yourself as much as I do; not for it to be a chore.,” Luna cooed with a smile. “Understand?”

“I-I guess,” Twilight muttered with a hint of disappointment. “I’m sorry I ruined things like this. I took a wonderful night and just made it awkward.”

“‘Tis nothing I've not done before,” Luna giggled. “Now dry your tears; I will not have you crying on the first night we spend together like this.”

“F-first night?” Twilight stammered. “But I thought you said—”

Luna quieted her again by placing a hoof over Twilight’s mouth. “I said that I was not going to have sex with you tonight.” She leaned forward and touched her nose to Twilight's, mischievously flicking her tongue across Twilight’s lips. “I never said that I was leaving.”