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An accident with Starlight and Twilight’s newest magic spell causes the CMC and Trixie to be in an unknown place and time. They must find the way in this seemingly new land and hopefully find the way to their time.
Strange choice of characters but... this was kinda made to make myself feel better since these are my favourite characters and I don’t want them dead...
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Trixie
11019084
she lost her ‘i’! What will she do without it?
Oh no
Hehe
Jokes aside, thanks for pointing it out
Very nice, following this story!
11019105
Thanks!
My prayer has been answered.
I was looking for more of generation crossover between 4 and 5.
11019117
Thanks for reading!
If it makes you feel better, it's doubtful they died horrifically. This is My Little Pony after all.
Ok very interesting start of a story it's a little fast paced here but pretty potential so it looks like the cmc and Trixie accidentally Zapped into the future of the new generation and izzy found them and got her friends to help them out and I wonder how Trixie and cmc got them self back to the past I guess we'll find out next time
A little too fast but decent. Perhaps slow down a little to allow the readers to digest the situation and this'll be perfect.
11020813
Hehe... I had the same series in mind when I made the title
I'm already liking this story and looking forward to more. :)
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Thanks for reading!
11021328
You're very welcome.
omg I LOVED THIS
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Thanks for reading!
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I hope this newest one is not as rushed
Well then that was a interesting situation and seeing Trixie basically getting drunk and basically making a fool of herself but something tells me she still got some explaining to do about where did the Cutie Mark Crusaders and tricks they came from well I guess we'll find out next time
That was a really funny chapter.
Halarious chapter but I have to ask when will sunny make the connection the sweetie bell and apple bloom are related to the rarity and applejack
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When they start talking about Twilight and Ponyville and etc.
Okay, two things I cannot leave without mentioning:
1. Try to add punctuation at the end of every dialogue... thing, like this:
2. Whenever a dialogue thing ends and immediately moves to the next paragraph, you don't need to put a period on the end outside of the quotation marks, like this:
instead, use
But overall, I still very much enjoyed this chapter, and can't wait to see more!
Why didn't you respond to my comment?
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You mean this one?
It’s because I didn’t feel the need to respond to it
interesting premise. have a track.
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Thanks for reading!
Izzy, what are you thinking about?
Oh no, our precious cinnamon roll isn't so innocent after all!I love this series so far can't wait for the next part! 👍
Keep going. I LOVE IT!!!
Okay so it looks like Trixie starting to settle down and looking outskirt of the town and she's feeling a little homesick and it looks like sunny and Izzy wanted to talk to Trixie and the Cutie Mark Crusaders about the situation and it looks like they did travel through time into the future Boy things got really difficult
That's
Wait did she just break the fourth wall
It looks like Trixie and the Cutie Mark Crusaders are in the Panic how in the world are they going to go back to the past well I guess until then they just had to go through this for now until they figure out how to I wonder how that will go guess we'll find out next time
You have my attention
I would say that this is amateur writing but then I realised you're still starting out (and wrote more stuff than I did within less than a year) so I guess baby steps and practice makes perfect from here.
You've got a good concept and character portrayal so far, there is just a lack of sophistication within your fic's direction (that reminds me so much of my earlier attempts of story writing as a kid). Still, A++ for Effort.
This is great so far! I can't wait for the next chapter!
Honestly, there was one thing I was quite surprised about: you mentioned that there aren't any Alicorns in G5, which is technically both true and false at the same time. True, because there aren't any fully grown Alicorns that look like Celestia, Luna, or Twilight when she was fully grown. However, Sunny was shown to have Alicorn abilities at the end of the 'New Generation' film, where she got her magical wings and horn. Even if they aren't physical, both her wings and horn are fully functional, meaning she should be able to do pretty much everything that Twilight was able to do back in G4. Frankly, I am a bit surprised that this wasn't brought up whatsoever, either in this chapter or in any of the previous chapters. It is quite a strange omission, given the nature of the conflict within the story (in that Trixie and the CMC need to find a path back to their own time).
So far, I am loving the story here. I think it would be interesting to see what happens next. I do think it would be interesting if there is one moment in the story where maybe Izzy find the Alicorn Amulet and, knowing how powerful it is, attempts to use it to help bring the CMCs and Trixie back to their timeline. Unfortunately, due to being unaware how quickly the amulet can take over a pony’s soul and mind, Izzy subconsciously begins losing control of herself, even attempting to kill her own friends a few times until Trixie forcefully takes the amulet off her.
Okay, got a alert there a update on this, but there no new chapter
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Yeah, sorry, I unpublished it to quickly fix something but it should be up now and ready to read
Trixie, what did you do? I imagine she wanted to find the alicorn amulet for some reason, but Izzy managed to snag it before Trixie could.
This really isn't Sunny's day. What will she do now?
Well this was some serious pacing whiplash. It jumps from 0 to 100 very fast.
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Good thing or?
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Not great. Still tracking this but yeah it lost points.
My Little review & Feedback I did your review.
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She did.
nice
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Added to my read list.
Well this was unfortunate that this story was canceled