Im new to writing so criticism is appreciated
Have you ever wanted superpowers? Or for a chance to escape your reality? Maybe both. But let me tell you now, sometimes power comes at a price. For some the price is too great but to others they would give anything for the ability to become virtually anything. Until… until they realize too late that it wasn’t worth it and have to live with it. This is one of those tales.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Interesting story waiting for the continuation
I hope this story gets more chapters.
11111332
I've been I tad busy recently, but a chapter is in the works.
I apologize for the delays
holy block text batman, this early stuff is like a wall of words! They aren't bad but they are definitely in need of some breaking up. Will continue reading though.
11217870
Sorry, I’d always have the stuff in paragraphs but when I’d port it over it blocks up. I’ve been trying to figure out why and got it fixed
11218129
noice, the later chapters arent as bad about the blocky text. I just use the paragraph breaks (I think thats what they're called. Whatever the enter key does). Those tend to paste well.
11236789
I apologize if his intentions are a bit unclear as I am a bit new to writing and this story is to “sharpen my claws” in a sense. To make light of his intention (which now that I look back aren’t clearly stated) they are to cleanse this world of harmony magic which is more or less choking out the worlds natural magic however he want to do so with as little possible deaths so that he won’t have any guilt upon his somewhat fractured conscious (and to avoid Arbiters nagging). This problem had initially been discovered when he was scanning the magic of the Everfree and found that the Everfrees magic was slowly disappearing further more he found that pony genetics were complete immune to harmonies harmful effect and were even perfectly adapted to it (this line of reasoning however will be explored later on)
Did I make any sense? Or did I just complicate it for you?
11237191I
would like to make a correction there as he isn’t a nanomancer which I assume is someone who can manipulate nanotechnology, his main ability is associated with technology but it’s geared towards research and development (at least how I see it) while another is a natural affinity with eldritch beings like Cthulhu and such and finally the ability to become infinity intelligent (this is causing him to have a blue orange morality)
Bottom line he can make all kinds of technology that is no different from magic in application. However, he can’t just will the machines to make themselves (though he could if he created an assembly line but he prefers to make stuff with his own two hands)
Though everything else you said was more or less spot on.
11237423
Ah alright then, by that definition he could indeed be considered a nanomancer.
im pretty sure you meant for the story title to be "A Technological Displacement" rather than "A tecnological Displacement."
11285083
Didnt notice, thanks for pointing it out though
Welp, besides the slight rushed feeling of the beginning few chapters. This was a wonderful story to read and I look forward to more in the future. Keep up the splendid work and remember to reread your work in case of grammar mistakes, mien fruend.
11305526
Thank you! Its very nice to hear that my story is appreciated, however I do apologize for not responding sooner as I’ve been unable to get on fimfiction for various reasons. I do plan on expanding upon the other chapters when I have the time to as well so stay tuned. :)
11309477
Hahaha! Its fine man, you take as much time as you need. We can wait.
11492674
?
Update When?
11506992
I am currently working on another story one much larger, but I will eventually get around to the second act of this story eventually
Well done so far as long as tokens don't happen you might be the only good Dispacement writer. ( I find Tokens break immersion and the pacing of a story also they also destroy any and all drama.)
11533763
I had considered it at first but ultimately decided against it for various reason I won’t bore you with, and thank you for the compliment it’s means a lot! Though I’m sure there are many more writers much more talented than myself it’s always nice to see someone appreciate one of my pet projects. (I also agree with the sentiment of the displaced token breaking the immersion to a certain degree as I’ve picked up and dropped stories due to them have a token every other chapter, and even if I do have a “crossover event” it’ll be from within my own set of stories and not with other creators)
Update When?
11721770
Currently unknown as I am making the next chapter for my other story, however this story isnt forgotten just on the back burner as I work out the kinks in the MC’s interaction with celestia
Welp, playing god now
Please continue this story!!