Pear Butter is a lonely widow. While she has some desire for Rarity, she knows Rarity is with her daughter. Rarity, while loyal to AJ can't help but notice how attractive Pear Butter is. But when Applejack cheats on Rarity, will Rarity embrace thoughts she previously found taboo?
Note: In this world, there are some noticeable changes: Pear Butter is the matriarch, Granny Smith has passed on, and AJ isn't the Element of Honesty. Her work ethic is almost non-existent and she displays the qualities of a 'free spirit'. Seeing little value in a committed relationship, she plays the field. Because her mother survived though her father still perished, AJ feels no need to step up and be strong for others. She also never left for Manehatten and she never had that "rainbow moment."
A bit odd on getting ratio'd, although I don't wonder if it comes from Applejack being very OOC.
The re-write is definitely better.
Pear Butter comes across as a bit manipulative, but I think it works.
And the image of Rainbow Dash throwing a purse over her shoulder as she stomps out is now permanently seared into my brain. And I love it.
10971568
I agree and yes it is a very powerful image, isn't it? Pear butter is supposed to come across as manipulative by the way. That was intentional.
10971563
I mean I set two ships ablaze and then Applejack is technically a villain possibly pear butter as well in this. And she's considered sacred to the fandom and then there's the fact that people have waifus. So they probably feel like I outright attacked them, expected dislikes but I had to do the rewrite because it wasn't my best work now I can safely say I did my best and I can continue my story. As for applejack being out of character, I'm afraid this is an alternate universe and it's already been set up Applejack is not the element of honesty. I even explained why in the description. I do hope you'll stick around and enjoy the story.
10971848
Your AJ in this story is a bit jarring. She's just so different from our beloved background pony.
But by keeping everyone else essentially how they are, it balances. It provides an emotional anchor that makes it safe for us to explore this vastly different Applejack.
And as for torching ships...yes please. I quite enjoy when established favorites get taken down.
10973032
truth be told...she isn't all that different, but people have a habit of not waiting and seeing how something plays out and to each their own. I suppose for those that stick around, some very apparent similarities will emerge...such as lying to spare feelings. (a trait of early series aj...that felt very realistic to the situation coming)
I would suggest the dislikers wait until the story is finished before they decide such things...it may surprise them. [I have done a...can I say shitload on this site...well a lot, of research and analyzing of behaviors, tracing plausible (yet unconfirmed) effects and the causes behind each course of action. This was not a spontaneous fic.] Though I know they won't and that's their choice.
Cancelled? Weak. It is a pity that we do not get to find out where this was going.
10974738
not many-voiced an interest. If you are interested, please speak up, because the hate I am getting is a bit prevalent atm.
10974742
The story is too early in its development to have a proper opinion on it, especially given that there are a number of unusual literary devices that are being worked in. I do not know how this will all come together yet. Just keep in mind that it is only the lazy-minded who use reddit buttons en lieu of expressing critique. As a general rule, take upvotes/downvotes for what they are worth: half-assed contributions made by people who have nothing worth contributing.
10974814
Alright, you got a chapter 2. Not canceled anymore. You gave an actual logical argument, and you have won me over, Fuckin A...you got yourself a chapter 2. Not being sarcastic or joking, I really love how you took the time to express a real critical thought on why it being canceled sucks. <3 much appreciation.
10974816
Thank you, brother. I will be reading.
I imagine that readers at this point are supposed to be highly distrustful of Pear Butter. She is downright intimidating, like a mother who draws her Mom Powers from the Dark Side. It contrasts sharply with just how nice and genuine Sweetie Belle and Rainbow Dash appear to be.
10975343
I like to think she's a bit...in control. Dominating, if you will. Though probably not for the reasons most would think. She loves nothing more than being in the driver's seat and teaching lessons. Perhaps more aptly put, lessons in tough love. Think of her as Chaotic Neutral; the methods don't matter if the goal is achieved in her eyes. As to what that goal is? Only time will tell.
Butter reminds me a bit of someone in my past the way I've portrayed her and that person only had one thing on her mind: fixing problematic events and habits that were detrimental to my own well-being.
10975599
If Pear is to ultimately be a sympathetic character, I would think that it would good to give us a glimpse into her motivations in the next couple chapters, because right now it is very tempting to assume that she is just a particularly artful and ruthless cougar. Of course, a cougar can be sympathetic, but we going to need a reason to like her.
10976139
Not sympathetic. And she is very ruthless in her methods, but she isn't the cougar being assumed. She does have a plan to "fix" what she sees as a problem, and with her shall we say control of the situation, she has the tools at her disposal to do so. I don't want to give away too much, but the only thing she is after is the happiness of the brokenhearted and teaching a lesson that is desperately needed.
As I said she is Chaotic Neutral. She doesn't care what she has to do to achieve the goal, she will do it. Others' opinions of her don't concern her. What does, is the end result. After all, when it comes to such a dominating mare; Butter knows best.