Ponified Without Consent 2

by Kaidan

Ch. 3 Feign Six

Blueblood

I grumbled and kept my forelegs crossed as a butler and several maids finished setting up my breakfast on an elaborate table in the middle of my stateroom. To the left and right of my bed was a large, well-endowed sculpture of myself, Prince Blueblood, holding a rose between my teeth and dangling a member the size of a ship’s mast between his legs.

Of course I’d get stuck in this pony.

“Master Blueblood, your breakfast is ready. One hundred eggs arranged from soft boiled to hard boiled, and a side of steamed asparagus.”

I looked over the table at the carefully arranged eggs, each with a numbered placard to mark how well done each egg was. “Let me guess, I have to eat it under threat of banishment.”

“Yes, sir. Celestia nearly banished you when you escaped yesterday, but I convinced her it was just another… episode.”

For a brief moment I had managed to escape my captors, along with a dozen maids in nurses outfits, and ran off into the castle. I was beginning to think the staff was less my servants and more my handlers, to keep me far from the public eye where I could embarrass my dear Aunts. This did present a challenge to me trying to find a way back to Earth. Discord had said something cryptic when I ran into him, turning me into a lamp for a bit before snapping me back to my bedroom.

I guess Celestia has him whipped.

“Alright, then. I guess I’ll try a number 42.” I got up and walked over to the table, pulling the seat out with a hoof. The chair seemed to attach via suction to my hoof. I shook my foreleg, and it let go of the chair. Then I climbed in and looked at the breakfast before me.

The plate was a pure white ivory with gold leaf trim around the edges. There were 4 forks, two spoons, three knives, and five glasses. One of the cups had some orange juice in it, and in the middle of the plate sat an egg with the shell removed, surrounded by asparagus.

“Why couldn’t I have gotten sucked into Adventure Time instead?”

“Of course, Master Blueblood.”

I tossed the whole egg in my mouth, ignoring the utensils, and muttered. “Of course, Master Blueblood…”

The butler raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything, standing by until I had finished my vegetables. While I finished chewing, I took a look over to the door, where two of the maids had changed into guard outfits. They looked more like the stripper version of a guard outfit, which was what I’d come to expect.

“Very good, now I was able to pull some strings and keep your previous… engagement… today despite your shenanigans yesterday.”

I watched as a dozen maids began clearing the table and taking the dishes and extra eggs away. Before they could take egg 73, I snatched it out from in front of me and ate it too.

“Ok, I’ll bite. What were my plans today? A three way with a Yak and a Diamond Dog? A Princess Cadance cosplay? Dressing up as Tirek and reforming Cozy Glow?”

The butler didn’t seem at all interested, ignoring me and then clapping his hooves twice.

The door to the suite opened and in filed a familiar looking set of mares. Rainbow Dash, Twilight, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Rarity, and Applejack trotted into the room.

“Well, this is unexpected.”

I took a closer look and noticed something was off. For starters, Dash’s rainbow mane seemed to have some yellow hair poking out from under it, and her fur was turquoise. Next to her was Fluttershy, but again in a pink wig, and her light lavender fur was covered by a yellow flight suit.

It was the same for the others, and one by one I recognized most of them. “You booked me a seven way with the off-brand Elements of Harmony to keep me from interrupting the diplomats and embarrassing Celestia again?”

“Master Blueblood, you booked them, and at great expense I might add. They’re… well paid, and here to please.”

“Yes, The Great and Powerful Tr—Twilight is here to show you my canal of friendship!” Not-Twilight triumphantly declared. Beside her, both pegasi were hovering in the air to better cover their faces with their hooves.

“Yeah, what a fabulous way to earn bits for my town’s zoning permit…” The purple unicorn seemed the least thrilled to be here from what I could see, and I recognized her almost at once.

“Starlight?”

She raised an eyebrow and looked at me. Starlight had a curled purple mane in Rarity’s style, and had put on a white suit with Rarity’s cutie mark on it. “Have we met?”

“Ladies,” the butler explained. “We better guide him back into bed he’s got an… illness… only your elements can cure it.”

As the six of them started to surround me I had little choice but to back towards the bed. “Whoa, hold on now, I’m calling this off, you can all head home and keep your pay.”

The assembled mares looked at each other in confusion. Cherry Jubilee, dressed as Pinkie, was the first to speak up. “Huh? You had us come all this way just to get cold hooves? I was sort of curious if it’s true you could out-last a dozen mares…”

“Yes, I mean what are you all doing here? Maud, shouldn’t you be in college or something?” I pointed a hoof to the Not-Applejack, wearing her stetson and doing her best to cosplay an apple farmer.

“Well, I do have student loans to pay off… and I like things that are hard as a rock.”

I took a deep breath and sighed. “Okay, look, you mares are worth more than this. You shouldn’t have to sleep with some slob of a Prince under any circumstance… I’m literally not paid enough for this craziness and neither should you be.”

I pointed at Cherry. “You should head back to Appaloosa and use the bits on your cherry farm or something.” I pointed to Maud, “pay off the student loans and spend a little time with your family after you graduate.”

I looked over to Trixie and Starlight. “And you two, honestly I’m not sure what you’re doing here, but you two should try hanging out with each other and making some friends. Put the whole conquer Twilight and Equestria thing on hold.”

Trixie and Starlight looked at each other. “You hate Twilight too?” Trixie asked.

“I don’t know Twilight, I’m just starting a town where everypony is equal.”

“Well, if you need the greatest stage magician in Equestria to keep them entertained…”

I proceeded over to the last two mares that my Butler had apparently roped into this crazy orgy. “Lightning Dust, just because you’re a bit reckless doesn’t make you any less awesome as a flier. You’ve got what it takes, whether or not the Wonderbolts see it. You just need to learn a little self-control.”

The last Pegasus didn’t ring a bell. “And, uh, you do you, okay?”

My Butler stood there the whole time with a scowl on his face, as if he’d paid off the mares out of his own money. Maybe he had. I shooed them all towards the door and they all started heading back out into the hallway.

I saw the Pegasus I didn’t recognize go up and run her primaries up Lightning Dust’s flank. “Hey there, my name’s Cloud Kicker. What do you say we grab a couple drinks and bang?”

Lightning Dust’s tail twitched, and I heard her whispering. “Sounds like fun, it’s a good thing he bailed. I was never into stallions.”

Finally, once everypony was out of the room, I could sit down and relax. The cold tile floor helped a growing problem that I was having.

“Well, you might not have been lying about being sick,” the butler said. “I’ve never seen you turn down sex with one mare, let alone six. I better go get a nurse to cast a diagnostic spell on you.”

“Thanks, you do that, and I’m going to take a cold shower.”

The butler left, and I heard a lock clicking as the doors closed. I headed towards the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.

As soon as I was alone in the bathroom, there was a flash of light and Discord appeared.

“You! What do you want? You already turned me in once during my last escape,” I spat.

“Oh contraire, mon human.” Discord offered me a mock salute. “I just had to be sure this wasn’t one of your games. To say Blueblood is eccentric is like saying the meteor that nearly killed the dragons was ‘a minor earthquake.’”

I blinked a few times and picked my jaw off the floor. “Wait, you believe me? What changed your mind after I visited?”

“That little speech you gave, of course.” Discord caused a small projection to appear on the wall in a flash, replaying my speech to the six mares. “Trying to encourage them not to sell their bodies for bits? Blueblood would never have done that. Then you gave an inspirational speech to Trixie and Starlight? Oh I can’t wait to see what kind of chaos the two of them could cause together.”

I decided to cut off his monologue. “So, you can fix this, right?”

“I can’t fix what I didn’t cause, I don’t know how you got here, or from where.”

“Says the chaos god,” I muttered.

Discord rubbed his chin and snapped his fingers, causing an image of a small blue-green planet to appear in the mirror. He then tapped the mirror, shattering it into hundreds of small mirror images.

“Oh, I could send you back to Earth, but to which one? We’ve got one where the humans look like ponies, one where apes rule, another where a crazed madman consumed the power of a hundred demons to become a stronger sorcerer…” He picked a piece of broken mirror off the wall. “I’m quite fond of this one, personally. They believe in casual sex and have over a thousand rated M channels on cable.”

I had to bite my inner lip for a moment to keep from saying something snappy and upsetting him. I would clearly need his help. “How about Earth? The normal one?”

“616? I wouldn’t really call it normal… but if you want me to blindly fling you to another dimension in the hopes that maybe I guessed right.” Discord made a show of slowly moving his fingers together to snap them.

“Ugh, wait!” I walked a little closer to him. “Okay, so you’re willing to help, but you can’t help. So what exactly are you suggesting I do here?”

He smiled widely and his posture straightened up. “Why, a game of course! I’m terribly bored, and I happen to know exactly the pony with the magical skill to figure out how you got here. Once she knows how you got here, she’ll know how to get you back. It’s not something I’d suggest leaving to chance.”

“If you’re going to give me a riddle, maybe I’m not interested,” I complained.

“Oh, I’m not into riddles anymore… I’m going to send you to my friend, Fluttershy, and you will seek out Twilight and ask for her help. The game is the fact you’ve offended almost every pony you’ve ever met, and I half expect Twilight to drag you back to Celestia kicking and screaming... And that, mon human, would be quite the game for me to enjoy.”

I heard a door opening out in the main suite, the butler was probably back. “Okay, how hard can it be? Rarity hates me, but I don’t think I’ve upset Twilight yet… if she can help, then do it. Help me break out of here and reach her.”

“Don’t forget the catch.” He grinned. “You may have noticed harmony is strong here, and you’ll find it difficult to do anything that would cause chaos like say… convincing a bunch of ponies you’re an alien. It’s sad to say most ponies don’t understand chaos like you and I.”

He lifted a scroll into the air that unfurled, displaying the rules of the game. “So, to recap: Don’t hurt Fluttershy or I’ll end you. Get to Twilight for help. And try to convince her you’re a human without causing too many waves, or you may find she only hears what she wants to hear instead.”

I groaned and frowned. “Doesn’t really sound like you’re on my side.”

Discord snapped his fingers and a large foam hand with “#1” written on it appeared. “Oh I’ll be spectating and cheering for you. Of course, if you get caught by Celestia, we never had this conversation. Also, don’t mention to Twilight how you almost banged Trixie cosplaying as her, and you should do fine!”

“Master Blueblood?” the butler asked. He knocked a hoof on the bathroom door.

“Quick, please help me! I can’t stand any more of the insanity here!”

He chuckled and snapped his fingers, causing us both to disappear.

---

I landed in the middle of a small room that smelled like hay, wet dogs, and lavender incense. The room looked familiar and just as I placed where I was, I saw Fluttershy walk into the room and drop a cup of tea she had been holding in her hoof.

“Oh… um… help?” Fluttershy whimpered.

I saw a few animals start to filter into the room, luckily none of them was her friend the bear. “Wait, I’m not here to hurt anyone. Discord sent me, he said you could help me get to Twilight and figure out how to get home.”

I took a step closer to her. “I’m a human female trapped in this obnoxious stallions body!”

“Um, calm down, I’m not sure what you mean.” Fluttershy sat down and I noticed her looking me up and down.

“Please, just let me hide here, don’t let Celestia know I’m here!” I felt something hit my foreleg and looked down. It seems I had found why Fluttershy was a little distracted.

“Oh dear…”

“Sorry, it’s got a mind of its own! Just got to think about… what do men think about to fix this when it happens? Commitment?” I bopped my member with a hoof, which didn’t improve the situation one bit.

I looked up at Fluttershy to apologize again only to notice her staring intently at me. Some voice in my head tried to warn me to look away, but I couldn’t. I could feel myself slipping deeper into her green eyes, my body going warm and numb. A moment later, I felt myself collapsing to the ground, and the world went black.

Comments

[Mix-up]

this really should have been it's own story, with a female turn stallion having everything in Equestria conspiring against her/him to reach his goal and come off as a madpony, I wish there were still more of these kinds of stories again. Love the Cosplay part. From the looks of if Discord is unaware that a Changeling had replace Fluttershy and this takes places in season four before seeing that Starlight hadn't even founded he town yet. I wonder where she will end up next at Chrysalis's Hive I take it, through I would wonder what she will do with him seeing that Blueblood has nearly no influence over Equestrian politics and Celestia, he has a lot of bit, sure but he doesn't seem to have much discretion or control over it, and sending a decoy can only help the guy/girl out; I wonder if he/she could make a deal with Chrysalis somehow. I also wonder if she can even remember her own name while at it.

[Kaidan]

11016585
Yeah, I can't think of any females waking up as stallion fics, they're rare. The prequel's original idea was to have these 5 author's telling parallel stories together, each Point of View strong enough to have been it's own story. So Blueblood's arc is definitely full of a lot of interesting misadventures to be had, and could have been its own story.

Fluttershy was just giving Blueblood "the stare" to stop a crazy-sounding pony sporting a stiffy from getting any funny ideas.

An arc involving the changelings would have been pretty interesting, especially as a stand alone story, but to try to introduce it here would make it even harder than it already is to juggle 5 independent points of views with their own stories to tell.

[Mix-up]

11016600
Oh didn't realized it was the Stare we rarely see it used on HiE protagonists. I would be perfectly happy with not having the changeling in the story

[Kichi]

Hope this story don't end like the prequel

[Kaidan]

11057762
There's no way that'd happ—
cuts to black

I am doing NaNoWriMo and realized about a week in that it meant I probably wouldn't update my other 2 stories until December, which is probably poor planning on my part.

So updates will resume twice a month in December, and a whole new unrelated story will be released which may or may not help the wait for new updates to this story.

[Kichi]

11058887
Well, the previous story is in hiatus for 8 years and had only 5 chapters, so as long as you manage 3 chapters the next year, then it will be better, and if you manage to even give it a ending or continue, even better.

Also, just a suggestion but... Maybe this should be in a couple more groups that 'Pony transformation General'

[SoulstringsReburn]

11058887
Hello. I just wanna ask if this story will Be receiving updates.

I have had to edit this 5 times because of auto correct