• Published 9th Sep 2012
  • 13,506 Views, 619 Comments

Flipside - Bed Head



A retelling of the first two episodes in an Alt. Universe. Spike is the pony, Twilight the dragon.

  • ...
21
 619
 13,506

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"There's Sugar Cube Corner. That's where Pinkie Pie works," Ditzy explained as she flew along. "They have the best muffins...You feeling hungry all the sudden?"

In the short time that he'd spent with Ditzy Doo, Spike had started to wonder a few things. Just what could that cutie mark of hers represent? What exactly was up with her eyes? Most importantly of all: Just how in Tartarus did this pony manage to get lost in her own home town?

Ditzy had claimed she only had a few pick-ups to make. The mailmare's poor sense of direction had resulted in Spike getting a grand tour of Ponyville. Now the trio was passing by a gingerbread house that was apparently the town bakery, and Spike couldn't help but notice the longing look Ditzy was giving it.

"Well, the town is nice and all, Ditzy," Spike chimed in, waving a hoof at the mailmare to get her attention. "But I really need to get this article written. So if you could --- "

"Right, Town Hall!" Ditzy interrupted, pointing toward a side street. "Right this way, last stop on my route!"

"You're sure this time?" Spike muttered as the grey pegasus flew off.

He winced as Twilight rapped on the back of his head with her notepad.

"Be nice, mister. She didn't need to take the time to show us around you know," the dragoness admonished.

"She also didn't need to help me clean that cake off," Spike pointed out, his magic re-straightening the quill in his hat band for the third time. "That rain water was freezing by the way."

"She's trying to be helpful," Twilight argued. "Besides, you're already dry."

"Mostly, yeah." Spike let out a frustrated sigh. "If we use too much more of Ditzy's 'help', though, this article is just gonna be about her mail route!"

Coming around the corner, though, Spike was met with a pleasant surprise. A tall, official looking building that looked almost like one of the spires of the royal castle. If the spires were made of plain wood rather than meticulously polished marble.

"There it is!" Ditzy cheered from her place overhead. "We're gonna be holding the big party there tonight and everything!"

"Wow it looks...Nice," Spike managed to compliment as Twilight's camera clicked away. "A little under-decorated though, isn't it?"

"Prose!" Twilight hissed.

"Oh we've got the best pony for the job handling decorations," Ditzy assured her companions as they approached the building.

Her wall-eyed gaze drifted back the way they came. Somehow the smile on her muzzle got even bigger.

"Ooh, here she comes now! Hi Rarity!" Ditzy greeted, waving at whoever was approaching.

"Why hello, Ditzy," greeted a new voice.

Spike started to turn, stopped awkwardly half-way, and stumbled to regain his balance. Twilight yelped in surprise and fell from his back during the little dance, her camera flashing as she hit the ground.

Coming down the street was a stunning unicorn mare, one that Spike's eyes couldn't leave. Her pure white coat and rich, purple mane seemed to sparkle in the sunlight as she trotted up. Spike felt a clawed hand reach up and close his jaw, which he hadn't even realized was hanging open. The new mare had a quizzical look as she sniffed the air.

"Does anypony else smell cake?" she asked.

Spike mentally cursed, one hoof running through his short mane in a search for offending blobs. Ditzy giggled as she flipped her own mane a bit, a few more specks of batter flying out.

"Sorry, that's me," the pegasus explained. "Pinkie had a little accident with her welcome wagon earlier."

"Oh, I've always worried something like this would happen with those gadgets of hers," Rarity said before she turned to Spike. "Oh, how rude of me! I haven't even introduced myself and here I am chattering away."

She offered a perfectly polished hoof to Spike with a flutter of her long lashes.

"I'm Rarity," she said. "To whom do I owe the pleasure?"

The stallion was already picturing it in his head. He'd reach in and cup her hoof in his, planting a gentle kiss on it as he introduced himself—

"Oh yeah, this is Purple Prose and his friend Twilight," Ditzy cut in, Spike's plans shattering. "They're here from Canterlot to do a report on the party! Isn't that exciting?"

"Ooh, from Canterlot you say?" Rarity asked, her eyes now locked on Spike.

"Oh, uh..." Spike could feel his mind suddenly blank now that the mare was paying attention to him. "Yeah, she is. I mean, I am! We! We are..."

He mentally face-hoofed, magic pulling his hat down over his face to hide his blush. Twilight sighed as she brushed the last of the road dust from her scales and cleared her throat.

"We're reporting for the Canterlot Sun on Ponyville's Summer Sun Celebration," Twilight explained on Spike's behalf, holding up her notepad and camera. "We were actually on our way to interview the mayor—"

"But I'm sure that can wait!" Spike cut in, his magic yanking Twilight back by her tail. "So, Ditzy said you're handling the decorations for the party?"

Ditzy just had a big smile on her face as she watched the two get acquainted. Twilight rolled her eyes as her partner managed to find his nerve again. The dreamy look in his eyes made it all too clear what Spike really had on his mind as he spoke to Rarity.

"Well yes, and all of them are hoof-stitched at my own Carousel Boutique," Rarity answered, fluttering her heavily-lashed eyes at Spike. "Just wait until you see them. They're quite breath-taking, if I do say so myself."

"Yeah..." Spike agreed, a dopey grin on his face.

Twilight sighed and buffed one of her claws against her chest scales. She delivered a quick jab to Spike right below his cutie mark, eliciting a yelp of surprise from the love-struck stallion.

"Right, interviews," he tried to recover, seeing the look his assistant was giving him.

Twilight nodded in approval.

"Any chance you'd be available for one?" he went on, eyes going back to Rarity.

Twilight's palm made a very impressive noise as it collided with her face. Rarity just gave the reporter a smile and gracefully brushed past him.

"Why, I'd be honored Mr. Prose...Unfortunately it's already noon and—" The white unicorn was cut off by a loud gasp.

"Noon?! Oh my gosh!" Ditzy rushed into Town Hall in a blur of gray.

Just as quickly she burst out of the building and took to the sky. "I'm gonna be late picking up my muffin from daycare! Sorry, Mr. Prose! Sorry Twilight! It was really nice meeting you both!"

Just like that, the mailmare was gone. The other three looked at one another, the confusion apparent on their faces. Rarity managed an awkward smile to the two reporters.

"As I was saying," she went on, trying to brush off Ditzy's departure. "I have so much to do to prepare for the celebration tonight. I simply don't have time for an interview right now."

"Oh." Spike seemed to deflate at that, while Twilight jumped onto his back.

"Of course, I should be able to make some time after the sun raising." Rarity cast him a wink. "If you'd still be interested?"

Spike did his best to ignore Twilight burying her face in his mane as his own split into a wide grin.

"Sure, that sounds perfect!" he agreed.

"It's a date then," Rarity said as she pulled her wagon through the doors of Town Hall. "I'll look forward to seeing you and your cute little assistant at the party, Mr. Prose!"

Spike's eyes stayed glued on the white mare as she headed inside, the doors closing behind her. He let out a dreamy sigh once she was out of earshot.

"Well, at least we have one interview scheduled," Twilight admitted.

"She said it's a date," Spike agreed, lids drooping over his green eyes as the dopey grin came over him again.

"Prose you—" Twilight was cut off by another sigh, to which she rolled her eyes in response. "Yes, yes she did. Maybe we should focus on why we're here until then?"

"Huh?" Spike snapped out of his fantasy about the interview at Twilight's words.

"The mayor?" she admonished. "That ring any bells?"

"Oh right, right. I didn't forget," Spike tried to cover as he started for the door. "Hey, is my mane straight? Rarity went in there and—"

"You look fine, Romeo," Twilight answered with a chuckle. "Now can you please focus?"

"Right, totally professional," the stallion nodded, heading inside.

Rarity was hard at work already, her light-blue magic levitating colorful drapes and elaborate tapestries around the room. Spike's eyes lingered on her until Twilight jerked his head toward a nearby directory.

"Mayor Mare's office is this way, lover boy," she said. "Don't make me get out the blinders."

Reluctantly, the purple stallion headed toward the stairs and left Rarity to her work.


A door waited at the top of the stairs, simply marked "Office of Mayor Mare" in bold letters. Now that Rarity was no longer right in front of him Spike found it remarkably easier to concentrate. He put on his best smile before rapping on the door with one hoof.

"Come in!" came the cheerful voice of a stallion from within.

The two reporters exchanged confused glances. It was clear that they had both expected a female voice from the name on the door. The door opened to Spike's magic, revealing a room that caused Twilight's eyes to widen in shock.

Everything in the office was perfectly organized. Portraits and photographs of the town and various buildings the two had passed by lined the walls. Each one showed parts of the town in different time periods, and each was perfectly aligned and dusted. The rug sat in the exact center of the room, the curtains were drawn perfectly symmetrical, even the wadded papers in the wastebasket formed a neat pile.

Capping off the display of organizational talents was the mahogany desk at the far side of the room. Two small towers of papers sat on it, one on either end. Visible between them was a light-brown earth stallion with a darker brown mane.

"Ah, you..." the pony said, giving them a smile before snatching up the paper sitting in front of him. "Hmm, you're not on the schedule for today."

"Um, I guess not?" Spike said, unsure whether to apologize. "I'm Purple Prose, from the Canterlot Sun. Would you be Mayor Mare?"

"Me?" The stallion actually laughed a bit. "Oh no-no-no-no! I'm simply handling some of the extra paper work that's been piling up."

He walked from around the desk, giving both his guests a clear look of the hourglass cutie mark he sported.

"The name's Time Turner," he introduced himself, holding out one hoof. "I'm the mayor's assistant, time keeper, and manager of all things timey-wimey."

"'Timey-wimey?" Spike asked, accepting the hoof-shake.

"Yes indeed," he confirmed, missing the confusion on the other stallion's face. "I handle every timepiece in town from the ones in this room to the clock tower in the park."

"Ooh, we passed by that on the way here!" Twilight chimed in, tail wagging. "I was so impressed with how accurate it was. Even the ones in Canterlot are off by a few seconds from the royal sundial!"

Spike remembered that clock tower. More specifically he remembered Ditzy leading them past it three times while showing them around. He also noticed Time Turner actually seemed to be blushing a bit at the purple dragon's words.

"Ah, you flatter me," the earth pony chuckled. "And you would be?"

"Oh, I'm Twilight," the dragon answered. "I'm Prose's official assistant."

"Well it's wonderful to meet you," the earth pony said, grinning broadly to the reporters. "So, how can I help you and Mr. Prose today?"

Spike smiled. It seemed things were finally going right since he arrived at the train station.

"Well you see, we're covering Ponyville's Summer Sun Celebration," Spike explained in as professional a voice he could muster. "We were hoping to ask the mayor a few questions for the article."

Time Turner's smile faded quickly. He clicked his tongue, heading back to the desk with a solemn shake of his head.

"Oh dear," he muttered, taking a seat and pulling a paper off the top of one of the stacks. "I'm afraid I won't be able to help you there."

"What?" Spike bit back on his lip, reminding himself not to raise his voice again. "I mean, why not?"

"Mayor Mare's schedule is just far too busy today," Time Turner answered. "There's lots of preparation work that needs doing before the princess arrives after all."

He held up another sheet of paper, showing it to be a rather complicated looking time-table. Twilight's eyes seemed to sparkle as she stared at the sheet, every box filled in with tiny writing.

"There's barely anytime for lunch on there as it is," Time Turner said, apologetically, as he put the paper back down. "I can't tell you how long it took me to get it so she'd actually have time to do everything either."

"You can't just squeeze us in somewhere on the end?" Spike asked hopefully.

Time Turner gawked at the purple unicorn like he'd just spoken in tongues. Spike looked to his assistant only to see Twilight had her arms crossed. She was tapping one foot as she glared at him.

"What?" he asked.

"Sorry about him," Twilight said to the earth pony. "He has no idea how important a good schedule can be."

"Hey!" Spike protested.

Much to his surprise, Time Turner actually started laughing at that. The stallion got back up and rustled Twilight's spines playfully.

"You'd think I'd be used to the type," he said, still laughing all the while. "Especially with our weather manager."

Spike rolled his eyes, magic tugging at his hat as he tried to shut out the laughter and think of a way around their newest problem. Time Turner cleared his throat as he managed to work his way down to a few light giggles.

"So sorry, Mr. Prose," he said, covering his mouth to hide his smile. "I wish I could help but the mayor is booked absolutely solid until the end of the festival."

"There has to be somepony I could interview about this," Spike said. "It's important for the article! Maybe there's a town council—"

"No, Vice Mayor Ivory Scroll is already handling the other jobs Mayor Mare couldn't fit in her own schedule," Time Turner interrupted. "And Judge Oak Gavel is out in Manehatten visiting her mother. Poor dear took ill, very unfortunate."

Spike could feel the stress his magic was putting on his hat and he didn't care. Even though he could tell at the current rate it would probably tear sooner rather than later.

"How about you, Time Turner?" Twilight suggested, sparing the chapeau from an early end.

"Me?" the stallion parroted.

"Yeah," Twilight said as she held up the schedule. "You've got a lunch break coming up it looks like. Maybe we could get an interview with you over that?"

Spike's jaw was hanging slack as Time Turner rubbed one hoof against his chin.

"Well I don't see why not," he admitted. "There's a nice little cafe I like to go to, actually."

"That—" Spike cleared his throat and tried to regain his professional demeanor. "That sounds great!"

"Wonderful then," Time Turner responded as he headed for the door. "Oh and I'd hold onto that assistant of yours, Mr. Prose. She knows what she's doing. Shall we?"

"Right behind you," Spike confirmed as Twilight climbed onto his back.

He let the earth pony leave first before following behind. Spike turned his head back to Twilight's smiling face.

"What would you do without me?" she asked.

"You're the best, Twilight," Spike said, nuzzling her a little. "Whatever you want for lunch, it's on me."

"You sure you wanna say that?" Twilight asked. "I mean, with the luck you're having today..."

The two trailed off into laughter as they followed a (somewhat confused) Time Turner out of Town Hall.