A DOSage of Bad Medicine
It had taken a little bit for Ebony to calm down from the experience, helped in no small part by her mother's patience and her not needing to go outside where that thing was to pick up what she'd thrown. She was flummoxed as to how her flyswatter and bandoleer had ended up outside the apartment door so quickly, and she was confused as to why whoever had left them there would run away instead of greeting her like anypony else would in that situation.
Her first thought was that a speedy pegasus had seen what happened and braved that monstrosity to return them to her, but she dismissed it in short order. Aside from her mother there were only two pegasi who lived in the building, and not only were they not particularly quick, but both of them would be out working at this time and probably wouldn't return early for anything short of the feather flu. The second was that her mother was playing a practical joke on her, but that too was thrown out the window. Her mother might be the playful sort, but she wasn't mean.
It was when both hypotheses were rejected that her mother dropped a bombshell... or in her case, a spray can under too much pressure.
"Wait, wait, wait, what?"
"Volume, dear. Volume."
"Oh, heh. Sorry. But seriously, it was moving on its own? You saw it?"
"Didn't I just say that I did?"
That confused Ebony more than anything. She might have been ferociously creeped out by mannequins--with that fear being a secondary reason behind her refusal to consider any sort of modeling career--but she retained enough common sense to know that they were entirely immobile, and could not move without outside help. She shivered as a mental image of a mannequin charging at her crossed her mind. "I c-can't say I'm on board with that idea..."
"It's not going to be coming after you. Don't you worry," her mother told her gently, giving her a quick hug. "Last I saw it, it was resting in a small shelter down in the alley." She let go and turned aside, rubbing her chin with a hoof. "I wonder if it knows that it can't stay there for long. Mortar & Son are supposed to be back in a few days to pick up their supplies."
Ebony gave her mom a weird look. "Why would it 'know' anything?" she asked. "It's not alive." Under her breath, she added: "Thank Celestia for that..."
A smile. "Just entertaining a flight of fancy. I've always wanted to see new and interesting creatures."
"If by 'new and interesting' you mean 'scary enough for a Royal Guard contingent'..." Ebony muttered. "But seriously, you need to stop jumping to conclusions like that. There's no way something like that could be called 'alive'."
Her mother sat down on the living room rug and gestured for Ebony to do the same. "If you think that, then you'll want to be settled in for this. Let me give you a pop quiz, Ebony. Of the fifty-two apartments in this building, how many of them are occupied?"
Being a social pony, Ebony had once made it her goal to become acquainted with all of the building's occupants. She knew the answer by heart. "Thirty. It used to be thirty-one before old Oak Stake had his heart attack last season."
The pegasus nodded, wincing at that reminder. She'd always liked that thestral, as he'd had no shortage of horror stories to tell. "And of those thirty... not counting ours would make that twenty-nine... how many of them are typically unoccupied during the afternoon for any reason?"
It took Ebony almost a full minute for her to proceed through the entire list. "All but two. One's recovering from hip surgery, and the other's a day sleeper. Everypony else is out working."
"Two for two so far, dear. Let's make it three for three: with the rest of the family elsewhere visiting your aunt, and no one who would know where we live being nearby at the time, who do you think it was that returned your things?"
Ebony started to say something, but her mouth froze in mid-motion. She looked off in the direction of the alley, one eye trembling, then back at her mother. "...You're kidding. The m-mannequin left them at the door?"
"Saw it happen with my own eyes." The pegasus gestured at them meaningfully. "And since you woke me up by screaming your fear of it right in its face, that would explain why it decided to flee afterward: to keep from scaring you half to death. Call it what you want, but I call it 'considerate'. If that's not a sign of being alive, then what is?"
Ebony recoiled at her mother's stern tone. She knew she got like that if she wanted to spell something out without sugarcoating it. "If it's a-alive, then why does it look... look like that?" she protested.
"I don't know," her mother admitted, voice softening back to normal. "I've met a few bipeds in my life, but nopony that looked like this."
A blink... "It's bipedal?"
...which was responded to with a nod. "It stood tall and straight on two legs. I think if it tried to jump too high in the hall, it could've gotten its head stuck in the ceiling." She waited for Ebony to stop snickering before continuing. "It was wearing clothing, too. Some sort of white bodysuit with boots, a jeweled helmet, and light armor. I didn't see a tail, and I don't know if it has a mane or not." She held up a hoof to forestall another protest. "And before you ask me how I know it was a bodysuit and not something like fiberglass, it was marred with damage front and back. I didn't need to get up close to know that it wasn't in good shape. What did it, I don't know."
Ebony's grin had extra "cha" added to it. "Is it wrong for me to be envious of your eyes, mom?"
The pegasus shrugged dismissively as she sat up. "We all get tunnel vision sometimes. Don't worry about it, dear."
Wasn't quite what I meant, but whatever. Eebon followed suit as she looked in the general direction of the alley indecisively. Proper manners would dictate that she go down to there, apologize to that thing for her outburst and thank it for returning her things, but the mental image of an abomination wasn't so easily shoved aside. Another shiver, this time one that went straight to her bones. "All the same, Mom, I think I'd j-just have another freakout if I went back there. The s-sooner it leaves, the better."
Her mother smiled. "I understand completely. Would it be alright if I thanked it on your behalf, though? It's only polite."
If Eebon's mom had been anypony else, the mare would have been worried for her safety. As things stood... "Sure. That would be great."
A quick nuzzle later, the pegasus was out the nearest window, her wings beating silently.
I feel ridiculous. Someone of my storied history and capabilities without a home of her own, hiding out in a box like a vagrant?
Privately, I used to think the same thing about Zero. The legendary Reploid from a century past was reduced to fighting for a pitiful rebel band that would've been erased several times over without his intervention. The difference is that at least he had the freedom to move about as he pleased: I've seen camera footage of him returning to areas he completed mission objectives in for the sake of collecting Cyber-Elves that he missed on his first visit. Me? I don't even have freedom of my own anymore. I have to wait until dark if I want to keep others from seeing me.
And there are few things I hate more than being covered with dust and dirt. I'd wanted to get that dealt with after Omega was destroyed, but being sent here put a temporary kabosh on that plan. Water and ice are my friends, and they help me relax. Grime does not.
To save energy, I put most of my functions in sleep mode and place my auto-repair at its lowest setting. Inexperienced Reploids would probably keep that system going at all times, but it still draws on the body's supply of Energen, a.k.a. E-crystals. I'd rather be damaged and active than whole and deactivated, and it's not going to be entirely useful without a capsule to accelerate the process anyway.
I leave just enough of my systems and processes alone to stare idly at the shelter's interior and think about what I've seen in the short time since I woke up on that rooftop, because there are already a few things I don't understand. The first one is the big one: ponies being able to speak human languages. That by itself is physically impossible, as their vocal structure does not allow for it... but those two advertising ponies were quite clearly talking to each other in a spoken tongue, even if I couldn't hear most of it. Too, that young one's scream was in an accent that would not have been out of place in Neo Arcadia.
If I wasn't so dead-set on getting back home, I'd find a library and see if I could discover just how ponies got to be in charge of the planet. And since I'm nothing resembling a bookworm, that should provide an idea of how curious I find all of this to be.
The other thing isn't as high up on the priority list, but still odd all the same. When I was hit with that flyswatter, there was a thick green glowing outline around it that my scanners didn't recognize. When I recovered it, the outline was gone.
Maybe ponies here have a way of controlling objects remotely? Since their hooves lack any sort of digits with which to grasp objects, it would make at least some sense. If it turns out that they are cyborgs, that would mean their tech base is higher than first impressions would indicate, which theoretically means that their sciences are far enough along to allow research into interdimensional travel... but shouldn't that mean that the real estate in this city would look much fancier? Or is the race as a whole just into these old-fashioned aesthetics?
Either my mind's a bit loopy due to Omega, it's obvious that I was not built to be an interior decorator, or both. I'll let those viewing my memories make the call.
I sigh quietly. It's a long way until dusk. My kingdom for someone to talk to so that I wouldn't have to keep talking to myself...
"Hi there, Miss Mannequin," a feminine, dry, and mildly raspy voice speaks into the empty air as an unexpected weight settles onto my legs just in front of my feet. Oval-shaped yellow eyes stare into mine. "How's tricks?"
I leap halfway up the building---or at least I would if I hadn't shut off my limbs! "GYAH! What in---?! Who are you? How did you get in here?" Was that my voice? That shriek's not appropriate for a warrior!
"So you can talk," the voice says, not answering my question. "Good to know. You are aware that if you need a place to stay, there are plenty of unoccupied rooms here, right?"
I take a few moments to calm myself down before speaking. "I'm not an idiot, pony. That would require money, and I don't have any. On me or otherwise. Unless you'd be willing to take me in?"
The voice rejects that offer firmly. "You scare my daughter just by existing. I'm not going to subject her to your presence if she doesn't want it."
Something about this doesn't make sense, and it's not me speaking to a pony and expecting a response. "And you're not scared of me, why?"
The voice actually laughs at this. "I'm a horror aficionado, Miss Mannequin. I've seen, read, or heard about a lot of strange stuff across my life. Personal experiences, stage plays, books, you name it. Being able to talk to you is making my heart race with excitement. Kind of hard to scare someone with an off-kilter fear factor!"
"...So I'm a monster from some cheap production," I grouse, glaring... at what, even I don't know. "Nice to know that my place in life is secure."
"You're saying that whoever built you was trying to make you approachable?" the voice asked. "Because I have to say that it would have the opposite effect. The entire city would be on edge in your presence, even if you didn't do anything to antagonize them. Not because it's any fault of yours, but because of how we're wired as a whole. Unless we're at least passingly familiar with a given species, we'd be perpetually walking on eggshells." The eyes stared down sheepishly. "Though I would like to clarify that the reason my daughter panicked is because of her phobia and not because of any biological fear, so..."
"I gathered that much," I reply curtly. I'm not approachable? I don't know how to feel about that. "So did you come down here just to shoot the breeze? I have had a stressful day, and I would like to get some rest before I move on."
The eyes regarded something outside the shelter before their source spoke to me. "Want to talk about it?"
I don't trust the pony just yet, particularly not after she'd scared me as a greeting. I told her as much.
"Fair enough," she answered. "I'll get to the real reason I'm here, then." Her tone of voice became much kinder. "My child wanted me to say 'thank you' for returning her belongings. And I wanted to say 'thank you' for being mindful of her fears when you did. That was very appreciated."
That was worthy of a smile. I think it's the gentlest one I've offered in years. "Glad to have done it. You're welcome."
There's a bit of pressure around my leg just below the knee, but it's gone as quickly as it appears. The eyes began to move away towards the alley, and I finally recognize their source as the pegasus I'd seen earlier---
"Hold on a second," I spoke, the pony stopping before she left the shelter. "Something I've been curious about since that flyswatter hit me. I'd seen an outline around it when it landed, but when I picked it up the outline was gone. Do you know what that's about?"
The pony shrugged, her eyebrows furrowed in a way that seems like she was incredulous. I'm not an expert on equine expressions. "Not seeing the big deal. It was just magic. My daughter's a unicorn. I thought you knew that already."
...
Magic... she's being completely... how the... that can't... WHAT THE ACTUAL---
The pegasus watched wide-eyed as the mannequin's face contorted a bit in thought. She jerked away as its eyes shot open and mouth hung open wide, its visage one of pure shock...
...just before it sagged, abruptly falling asleep with a high-pitched groan.
"Um, hello?" the concerned pegasus inquired, nudging it a few times. "You okay?" She waved a hoof in front of its face. "Um... Sapphire Shores is here, and she wants to give you an all-expenses-paid pass to the city's best hotel?"
No response. She might as well have been talking to an actual doll for all the progress she was making. "Huh. I didn't think it would take it that badly. Weird. Guess it really did have a long day." She shrugged. "I'll check back later and see if its woken up by then. Maybe then I can get some actual answers on what it is..." A happy smile. But for now, it's a nice day and I feel like spending it with one of my favorite children. Wonder if Ebony feels up to having an early dinner at the park?
And so it was that Gray Ghost--a name prospective criminals once dreaded during her tenure with the Manehattan Royal Police--happily flew back into the building to collect her foal, content in the knowledge that the "mannequin" was never going to be a true threat to her family and home... and knowing full well what she was to do if she was proven wrong.
Mortar was on a roll today. He and his son Pestle had been called upon for five different repair jobs during the day, and they'd finished them all in record time and with little fuss. He credited it to decent weather and being well-rested for once, allowing him to focus on the tasks at hand without being distracted. It was a far cry from how he felt just after the Summer Sun Celebration, the most recent event of its line having been hosted in Manehattan this year. That had been tiring.
The grass green Earth Pony with the tan-gray mane and tail had been working for decades, his darker-toned son joining him of his own initiative when he reached adulthood. Home repair and remodeling weren't easy occupations, but they were ones he'd always had a knack for, and the fact that they paid well was just a bonus. As the years went by and increasingly newer renovations had come to light in different fields, he'd come to the conclusion that knowing how to fix them if they broke was a good call on his part. As such he'd taken a few different courses at local schools over the years just to make sure that he knew what he was doing.
Something else he'd learned during his career was how to optimize his time spent working. If one assignment was close to another and he already had everything he needed to get started, then it would make more sense to move on to that one instead of making the trip back to his office first. So as he and his son hitched themselves up to their work-cart after finishing their fifth assignment, he took note of the familiar street they were on and turned slightly to face him. "We aren't more than a few blocks from the Hyacinth Apartments. Think anypony will complain if we stopped by to pick up our supplies early?"
"They would probably thank us for it," Pestle noted wryly. The both of them checked to make sure no one was in their path before they started on down the road at a decent clip. "We were a bit too careless just leaving them scattered around. Rolled up like that, the tarp's a real tripping hazard. I wouldn't blame them if they just chucked the thing into the dumpster themselves."
"In my defense I'd wanted to get everything done before we got ripped away from work," Mortar retorted in jest. "Your mother was insistent that we ate out at Macro's Pasta sometime, and I know better than to test her patience."
Pestle snorted to hide his smile. "That's no real excuse for disregarding common sense, Dad."
"I know, I know. Just have to remember to be a bit more careful next time..."
Mortar & Son trotted on, not knowing of the unintentional tribulation that awaited them in that alley.
The name "Mortar & Son" was actually taken from a Detroit-area business called "Father & Son" that I used to hear TV jingles for during the 1990s. I want to say they specialized in home repairs and the like, but it's been more than fourteen years since I last saw the ads for it, so don't quote me on that. "No job too big, no job too small. We're Father & Son, we do it all!" ...Yeah, I miss Michigan.
While typing out the meeting between Leviathan and Gray, I almost misspelled 'money' as 'monkey'. That gave me an amusing mental image of Leviathan handing a monkey to the building superintendent, followed by Bucky Katt from Get Fuzzy showing up and the situation getting entirely out of hand. My mind goes weird places when I'm tired, though strangely that's when I do my best work. 
I don't actually think Leviathan's brain runs on MS-DOS. That was done entirely because I thought it was amusing and nothing more, so whatever error messages she was receiving before she crashed probably said something else entirely. 
Speaking of, those screenshots were created with the aid of DOSBox and Paint.Net.
(As a side note I grew up around DOS, so while I'm not an expert in its use, I know enough to get by.)
"Human Error - Think Again and Think Fast!" was based on a sound clip we had in 1994-95 that was put together using quotes from 2001: A Space Odyssey and The Maltese Falcon. Or at least I want to say it was "2001". I could be wrong on that--I wasn't paying attention when my dad downloaded the clip.
Those of you who follow the Batman mythos now know who I named Ebony's mother after. I'll shed a bit of light on her in my next Character Profile, whenever that is.
Macro's Pasta is named after the "Marco's Pizza" chain based up in Ohio. They used to have this one pizza I really liked as a kid called the Pepperoni Melt... aaaand I'm going to stop it right there before I start rambling.
I got this chapter done a little sooner than I expected, so I figured I'd go ahead and get it posted. I'll be taking a break from writing for a few days to focus on my videos, but I'll be getting back to the story soon enough. Ciao mein, and until then. >^_^<
Next Estimated Chapter Deadline: September 8th, 2021
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quick question, is Grey Ghost a Batman referens?
10954154
Bingo!
10954705
YAY!
10953725
Yeah, definitely better than some random shmuck! I feel it's uninspired, if you don't use the OG source material!
Welp, looks like Levi's in for a rude awakening!
10954154
10954705
Interesting.
Leviathan runs on software made in 2010? No wonder she crashed.
11055308
The joke here is that 2010's when FiM first hit the airwaves. :)
Because being able to PASTE the ad is normal fare for horses ^^;;;
Hey! Love the story this far, just started today. Not sure if this was brought up prior, but when listing things in the story, you used "too" instead of "two". The story is good so far, at least for me. Just something to watch for in the future my guy
11134843
I took a look at that, and I believe that was being used as an alternative to "also". I probably could've phrased it a little better, admittedly. ()^_^
Thanks for pointing it out.
Mortar and Pestle! That's adorable!
Oof, still on a version where segmentation faults can crash the kernel? Those were the days...
So it feels like we're pre season one then. Good to know.
Regarding Ebony's nickname, I feel like it would make more sense for people to still call her Ebony but playfully spell it as EbonE. Just throwing out my two cents there.
I am loving this story so far. I especially love that you made a believable but clearly parodied MS-DOS code prompt for Levi's attempt at dealing with magic. X3
Perhaps you could help me design code prompts for magic spells for an unrelated idea I had a while back? It involves a world where people have developed technology that allows them to temporarily rewrite physics around them using coding languages, effectively creating artificial tech-driven magic spells.
11183551
Well, no reason why she can't have two nicknames, is there? >^_^< It's still a good idea, though.
I don't know how much help I'd be.
I have some familiarity with MS-DOS on account of growing up with a Tandy 1000 (and later, a computer with Win 3.1), so I still remembered some of the expressions used. Programming languages... I've done a bit of it in the past for recreation, school and such, but most of what I've learned is long forgotten.
Thanks for the offer, though. It sounds like a neat concept.
“"How's tricks?"”
Huh?
11244189
Never heard of that expression before? It's basically an informal greeting. Might want to look it up.
Just... Reset I guess, and she will probably want to research magic
.....chagrin? a disappointed smile?
I may have failed to beat the first level of Mega Man X, but I've poked around enough on the Wiki to know that late in the timeline things tantamount to magic are commonplace, like weren't the elves basically psionic alien hybrids or something, mystic arts and 'what is a soul' type shit that gave rise to the later generations of reploids that succeeded humanity
i feel like it being called magic shouldnt be that far of a leap
Will there be any explanation as to why Gray Shot was sleeping on the roof? Or it already happened and I didn't realize it
11709552
There's a reason for her quirkiness, but if you haven't gotten to that point yet, I won't spoil it for you.
This story gives me a strong impression of overarching stupidity of all characters. Like... A trope.