Episode 91: (Dark World) The Ultimate Foe
Pony POV Series
Dark World Part 18
Who Can Possibly Defeat The 'Doctor'?!
"Doctor! Please! I know you're in there! You're just sick! You don't want to do this! You don't have to do this!"
"The Doctor you knew doesn't exist anymore, Ditzy. Or did you forget everything I told you about Regeneration?"
Rarity sighed. "The truth is that we're the same in that way. A thousand years of life experience don't simply go away." Rarity calmly telekinetically raised a clump of dirt and smeared a bit under both her eyes, as if it were war paint. "A pony can't simply become who they used to be."
(What happened to the posh and proper Rarity who'd have a nervous break down if she got so much as a strand of her mane out of place?)
"Now let's get started shall we? I'm going to annihilate you one by one." He 'cracked' his ergots.
"How about I just turn you to ashes now?" Spike said flatly and breathed fire.
"Ah, but I've got one hoof in the TARDIS! Protective forcefield! Kinda cool huh? I'm invincible!"
"Just once I wish I could meet a bad guy where my fire breath worked," said the giant dragon.
"I had a friend in the army once who felt the exact same way, actually," The Valeyard commiserated. He then cleared his throat. "My my, my throat is a little dry, and I seem to have nothing to remedy it. Would one of you happen to have a piece of rock candy I could have?"
"Oh! Ah do!" Apple Pie exclaimed, digging through her bag. Wait a tick, since when did she have a bag? But she had one, so she must have brought it along. And so it must have been hers.
"Huh?" she asked, pulling a comic out of her bag. "Ah don't remember packing this. Ah guess Pa or sis must've slipped it in so Ah'd have something to read."
"Oh! Here's a bottle of water! Never mind about the rock candy. Oh don't mind me, enjoy your little comic, I'll just be wetting my whistle a little bit."
"Oh! Ah ain't never seen this issue! SuperStallion: Whatever Happened To the Stallion of Tomorrow?"
"Apple Pie-don't!" Twilight warned. Too bad. Apple Pie speed-read the comic like lightning, (it helped that it wasn't a dialogue-heavy issue).
"Oh Pinkie Swear, it isn't psyche paper or anything. It's just a comic. Let the filly enjoy herself."
Apple Pie had gotten about halfway through it already when . . .
"No-no, that ain't, that ain't fun, that ain't cool, that ain't-"
"And that's how the comic series ACTUALLY ended! The publishers actually tried to cover it up! All of SuperStallion's enemies all got together and killed everypony EXCEPT SuperStallion! And after getting his revenge he felt so guilty that he gave up his own power and committed suicide by walking into the Frozenwastes unprotected! Deconstructive of 'villains are proactive, heroes are reactive.' That's what happens, little filly, when the villains stop playing by the 'rules' that writers foist on them. Just ask our friends here!" He waved a hoof at Applejack, Twilight, and Rarity, in turn.
"That day was a thousand years ago!" Applejack snarled.
"Hasn't been too long where I'm standing." The Valeyard retorted.
"You just shut up, you stupid Yard... Yard...!"
"Yardstick?" supplied The Valeyard, helpfully.
"Hey, yeah!" Apple Pie smiled at him thankfully. "That's actually a pretty good one!"
"I've been called every yard-related pun in the books. Shipyard, Courtyard Lumberyard... everything short of bloody Scotland Yard. But at least MY name doesn't sound like a crayon color, ice cream flavor, or overpriced cosmetic!"
He wheeled on Apple Pie, whose smile died.
"Face it, brat, in NONFICTION, there's no real way for heroes to win, because villains don't play by any 'rules.' How else do you explain the world you live in?! That's the entire reason you love those little rags so much, isn't it? Because in your world, the heroes already lost, so you find solace in a world where the heroes always win. Well guess what? Your hero lost everything and killed himself out of despair. If that's the world where heroes can win, what's going to happen to your friends in the world where heroes lost?"
"N-no-oh . . . " Apple Pie got on her knees and shivered. A grayness rubbed against her heart.
"Apple Pie! It's just a comic! Things aren't set in stone like that! You don't need to . . Apple Pie, listen!" The filly was not even looking at her. She was beginning to turn grey. She glared at the Time Lord. "You put it there?!"
"Don't waste ponies' time with the obvious. I also gave her the bag when you visited Neighpon. Perception filters, got to love them! You're nothing but pawns without a chess master.
"The Evil Overlord List did have one thing right. Neutralize the plucky comic relief first. You ponies have bodies like iron, hard to break. You have minds like toy blocks, easy to topple but also easy to put back together. But your hearts are virgin and alabaster, easy to break and no matter what happy patches you apply, the cracks remain underneath. But didn't mean it to hurt that bad. Now, Derpy, would you like a muffin? It's a very good muffin, just like the kind mommy makes, a little last moment of peace before we get started?" He offered it to Derpy.
Derpy wondered, was the Doctor still inside there somewhere? Was accepting this a way to bring him out just a little bit? He had done this for her once before after all, so long ago. Derpy reached for a bite.
Rarity's magic lifted the muffin up and tried to shove it into the Valeyard's mouth who instead crushed it between his hooves.
"That muffin was poison!" Rarity shouted.
"Well I did say it was like how her mother made." The Valeyard shrugged. "I didn't specify WHICH of her mothers."
Derpy looked mortified. "B-but you said you didn't mean-"
"I meant it to hurt WORSE!"
Rarity had felt that twisting of truth too.
"AH THOUGHT DERPY WAS YER FRIEND!" AJ shouted.
"Well, between me needing to kill and subjugate for Discord and her needing to run endless laps 'round the castle corridors, our relationship kind of... fizzled out." The Valeyard said waving a hoof dismissively. "Oh, and the poison was just a fallback, by the way. The point was to implant a post-hypnotic suggestion via neural reconnecting peptides which I'd baked into the muffin!"
"That's nothing but pseudoscientific gobbledegook!" Twilight exclaimed.
"Better than saying 'it's magic,' isn't it?"
"No! It's worse! If you're going to call it science and explain how it works then at least be legitimately scientific!"
"Oh well. Regardless; I gave her a muffin sometime in the past which'll make her my mind slave... either a hundred and five years ago, or half an hour ago with the TARDIS, take your pick. Ahem. Derpy-Ditzy! Roseluck is a bad wolf."
Derpy's body stiffened. Spirals swirled in her eyes. "Yes Doctor, I'll do whatever you say." She spoke in a happy monotone, "I am your loyal companion."
"All your friends have been replaced by evil alien androids. Smash the evil alien androids' heads. Start with the little one."
"Yes, Doctor, I shall obey. I am your loyal companion."
The Valeyard's comic book had left Apple Pie too emotionally devastated. She made no move to flee or fight Derpy.
Spike tried to grab Derpy with his tail and claws but the Element of Loyalty glowed and her speed increased at the last moment, it was like trying to catch a fly.
Rarity began to lift Apple Pie out of the way but was head butted by the quick Derpy losing her grip. "Bad evil android!"
Twilight tried to touch her with her horn to snap her back to reality but, "Bad evil android mind control wand!" Twilight found her horn cracked.
Spike covered Apple Pie with his claw, which Derpy then began to PRY OPEN, cracking her own bones as she happily did so. "I'm helping the Doctor!"
But just as Derpy closed in on her, a replica of the Valeyard appeared in front of Derpy.
"Derpy!" It said. "I've been turned into an evil incarnation of myself so don't listen to a thing I say!"
"Yes, Doctor, I shall obey. I am your loyal companion." Derpy blinked and shook her head. She glared at the Valeyard. He really WAS just an evil incarnation of himself: no good left! She HAD no loyalty to this monster.
The Valeyard's face stayed totally straight. "So . . . you STILL have the Element of Deceit." He pointed at AJ, and then pointed at Rarity, "And YOU are the Element of Honesty, now. Now that we've got that sorted out, I know what to expect. Didn't want to implement a plan and have the mineral-sexual turn out to be Kindness or something. Tom looks positively SMASHING by the way, Miss Rarity, a real record BREAKER in terms of rock-solid stallionness."
"You're only saying that to goad me."
"Congratulations. Most don't even get that. But you didn't win. Because I never lose."
"THIRTEEN MAY NOT BE THE CLOCK-SMITH BUT YOU WEAR ALL HIS ROBBER-BARONS!" Derpy shouted, shook her head and spoke again, "You love your voice too much, you're arrogant, you think being rational is dumb when you do it all the time, and everypony here already KNOWS how much you love to make teleporting work-left! Work-wrong! You're not perfect, Valeyard!"
The Valeyard laughed, "Perfect? Ha! Who'd want to be? Frozen in a state of being, unable to adapt... what an obvious shortcoming! What I am is perfectly flawed! Which is much better than 'perfect.'"
Twilight felt an aneurysm coming on. "?! . . . That's not perfection! A truly Perfect Being would either be able to adapt instantly to any situation or not need to!"
"Please. Perfectionism's right up there with 'logicality;' oversized weaknesses I don't chain myself down with. Logic is just being able to be wrong with authority. That's why the perfectly logical donkey always starves to death when faced with two equal sets of hay."
"THAT'S NOT LOGIC! The logical thing to do is PICK ONE because starving to death with food right in front of you's the most illogical thing EVER!"
"Your head really is up your flanks. Haven't all your greatest victories been when you pursued the illogical course of action, like the act of challenging Nightmare Moon to one-on-one combat?"
"That wasn't illogical! I did the logical thing and TRICKED her into thinking I wanted to duel, so as to slip past her without risking a fight I couldn't possibly win! And how would you know about that, anyway?! You weren't there!"
"Celly loved to talk about you." The Valeyard smiled. "Please observe." Then he threw a baseball at Rarity who caught it reactively. At the same time he took out a tiny blowgun and blew a little dart which pricked Spike in the snout.
"Hyper-concentrated dragonsbane. An entire forest's worth. Absorbs right through the scales. Have a nice life... all thirty or so seconds of it."
Spike opened his mouth to say something, but the fire inside him died and he rolled violently on his side.
"SPIKE?! SPIKE!!!" Twilight cried in raw panic.
Spike shivered as paralysis kicked in, his body temperature nosediving in seconds. Everything was going black, he couldn't hear anything, he couldn't think! It felt like his blood was turning to ice!
AJ pushed Twilight away and pressed herself against Spike. "Kindness!" Her body symbol glowed.
"And YOU are the element of Kindness!" The Valeyard said to Applejack. "Deceit AND kindness... Ha! How poetic! The only time it's ever WORTH acting kind is DURING a deception!"
"Rarity! Ah'm slowin' the poison but there's just too much of it!"
"I understand! MINE!" Rarity stabbed Spike with one hoof. Her insides turned into icy liquid from absorbing poison meant to kill a dragon. She fell over, dead for several seconds as her internal organs reconstituted.
It seemed Spike's version of Generosity didn't heal.
Time enough for Valeyard to take another thing out of his cape, a big lump of mud he threw right at Rarity that spattered over her face and body.
Rarity got up shakily. Her intestines hadn't finished regenerating. "Sorry, Valeyard, darling. Mudslinging might've actually worked on me... a thousand years ago. But I am no longer that vain mare who'd have a meltdown if she couldn't visit the spa once a week to clear out her pores. I-I-I-I-I-" Rarity screamed and she began hoofing at her own face, her eyes closed tight, as they were on fire to her. "AAAHHHH!"
"That powder mixed INTO the mud, on the other hoof, sure seems to affect you just fine. Working into your muscles, nerves, and brain soon. Rewriting your pain center's genetic code so you'll be in immortal agony!"
"Spike!!!!!!! BURN ME!!!"
Spike opened one eye. And saw the love of his life. He felt so weak. He didn't have a regenerating body like the others. The dragonsbane might've been sucked out, but his body was still damaged, still needed time to cure itself.
"Rarity, I-"
"I SAID BURN ME!"
(What happened to the good old Spike who'd just grumble but obey?)
Spike breathed fire, encompassing Rarity's body. She screamed anew as her outer layer burned away, and her immortality regenerated a new one for her.
"I didn't anticipate you exploiting your immortality that way. Congratulations on being a little bit smarter than the average ungulate."
Spike passed out, having used up what strength he had. Twilight clamored on top of him, bawling into his chest.
"Spike, Spike... don't leave me, Spike, you're my family..." she moaned.
"This was entirely avoidable, you know." The Valeyard informed her. "Were I in your horseshoes, I wouldn't have settled for any killable companions, not even a powerfully-built one like Spike. You should've held out until you had a complete set of immortals to act as Element Bearers. Even if it meant dragging Traitor Dash, Fluttercruel, and Angry Pie into those roles, kicking and screaming. Really, Twilight, you simply INVITED this fate on Spike."
"You don't pick companions! COMPANIONS PICK YOU!!!" Derpy shouted. "Right Doctor?"
"GAAH!" Those words did more to damage the Valeyard than anything the ponies had done so far.
"You're right," Twilight whispered. "Thank you Derpy."
Rarity looked at the Valeyard. "What I desire Valeyard is you as paste." Stones ripped out from the ground, forming a stone Alicorn suit of armor around her body,"We will crush you, Servant of Big Banana Discord! I'll drag you out and squash you flat!"
"Oh me. Oh my. I am so terrified. Dramatic gasp of fear." The sheer flatness of the Valeyard's voice was nothing short of emotionally captivating. "Whatever shall I do?"
Then his face brightened, "Oh wait I know!" He took out a jar and unscrewed the lid. "STONE MITES!"
The jar proved bigger on the inside than the outside. It wasn't simply a swarm of gray insects which flooded. It was a living SANDSTORM.
Apple Pie's eyes widened with the horror, at last reacting. The insects ate away at Rarity's armor at a speed to make parasprites proud.
"Rarity! Are you willing to be Pinkie Pie at war?" Twilight shouted.
"WHAT?"
"Are you?!"
It click in Rarity's mind. "GO FOR IT!"
Twilight fired several blue 'fireballs' at Rarity, then conjured a dome spell around Rarity just before they detonated. The temperature inside dropped below zero instantly. Everything inside glowed the color of Rarity's magic.
"Those weren't fireballs." The Valeyard observed.
The stone mites went to pieces. So did Rarity, but the stone mites weren't immortal and it was faster than waiting to thaw.
Twilight quickly brought the field down. Rarity's horn still flickered, as she used a piece of frozen stone as a crutch.
"You said 'Pinkie Pie at War.' " Rarity pointed out dryly.
"I didn't have time for a better analogy. I figured something that burrowed through rock was evolved to withstand heat and pressure more than the sub-zero."
The Valeyard clapped. "Well that was fairly clever. But you rely on that immortality way too much. Never know when you'll find yourself without it!" He said cheerfully.
A stone mare punched him in the face, still rising out of the ground, encompassed in Rarity's magic. Its mane was made out of red and brown minerals. It grabbed him by the rear hoof by the time it had fully emerged from the ground and threw him out of the TARDIS' protective field.
"Roseluck?!" The Valeyard exclaimed, in shock and recognition.
Rarity spoke, her horn glowing. "Roseluck lingered behind. She didn't want to leave with my other original party guests."
"You're still delusional!"
"All I know is she wants to help. She said the TARDIS would recognize her as a friend and that she couldn't STAND YOU MAKING A MOCKERY OF EVERYTHING THE DOCTOR STANDS FOR!"
"I thought you lost your power to create puppets!" Twilight gasped.
"You didn't tell me that," Rarity said.
"Roseluck? Is that you?" Derpy whispered.
"How is this possible?!" the Valeyard asked. "This makes no logical sense! Life is just nature keeping meat fresh! She's been dead for a thousand years!"
"Simple, 'cause it looks like our loved ones saw an openin' to free us from our boss," Applejack said, "Including you!"
"What could I use now? I know. ANOTHER jar full of stone mites!"
The Valeyard pulled out another jar and opened it, the contents made a hungry beeline for the stone Roseluck.
(Now's your chance! You know what spell to use.)
Twilight then cast a spell that had backfired when she had used it in Ponyville.
The stonemites stopped, sniffed the stone Roseluck with obvious distaste, then reversed course right towards the Valeyard, changing swarm formation into a hungry mouth shape.
"Who could have predicted this?! Oh right! Me!" He pulled out a spray can marked 'Stonemite-B-Gone' and sprayed it in the swarm's general direction which fell dead before they could get close.
This was when the stone Roseluck leapt and held him down with her massive weight, looking at him hatefully with stone eyes.
And this was when Twilight Sparkle galloped forward, skidding to a stop in front of the Valeyard and... set her gently glowing horn against his head.
-----
"If you could touch the alien sand, and hear the cry of strange birds, and watch them wheel in another sky... would that satisfy you?"
"All the evils I have fought, while you have done nothing but observe! True, I am guilty of interference. Just as you are guilty of failing to use your great powers to help those in need!"
"Well, Sergeant, aren't you going to say it's bigger on the inside than it is on the outside?"
"I know that although the Daleks will create havoc and destruction for millions of years, out of their evil must come some good."
"I owe it to my friend to try because I got her into this! So you see... I'm not going to let you stop me now!"
"Power-mad conspirators, Daleks, Sontarans, Cybermen... they're still in the nursery compared to us! Ten million years of absolute power. That's what it takes to be really corrupt!"
"There are worlds out there where the sky is burning and the sea's asleep and the rivers dream; people made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there's danger, somewhere there's injustice, somewhere else, the tea's getting cold. Come on, Ace, we've got work to do."
"You want domination over the living, yet all you do is kill!"
"Everybody lives, Rose! Just this once, EVERYBODY LIVES!"
"And when you go back to the stars and tell others of this planet, when you tell them of its riches, its people, its potential, when you talk of the Earth, then make sure you tell them this... it is DEFENDED!"
"'Nobody important?' Blimey, that's amazing. D'you know, in nine-hundred years, I've never met anyone who wasn't important before?"
To leisurely look back on a single memory, some odd, lazy Tuesday, and snicker at his own stupid virtuousness... this was one thing.
This was a deluge. An avalanche.
And Twilight experienced them with him. Nine centuries of awe and wonder.
Had Twilight simply strapped The Valeyard in front of a television screen, and replayed these memories from there -- he might have been able to sit through it all impassively. But these WEREN'T just images and audio. Twilight had brought back all the things television could never capture:
Excitement, whenever he opened the TARDIS' door onto a new surprise...
Horror, whenever some race of invaders terrorized the native populace...
Heartache, whenever a companion deemed it was time to part ways.
Delight, whenever a companion's jaw dropped in awe.
Outrage, whenever he spoke out against injustice.
Pride at gaining the trust of a stranger.
Grim resolve, at times he'd sacrificed his life, a regeneration, for the sake of those who only had one life to live.
Relief and elation at having pulled another world from the brink of doom.
Over nine-hundred years, uninterrupted. Relived, re-experienced, re-evoked, full force.
And the Valeyard roared with laughter in the face of them. A black tidal wave came crashing down. It laughed too.
And Twilight The Unicorn was screaming.
-----
Twilight felt as if some horrible spider's nest were hatching within her brain.
{Twilight? Bad news. You've just been infected with a debilitating neurological disorder, namely... ME!!!!}
(What in the...?!)
"Valeyard?!"
But while Twilight looked down, the Time Lord grinned up at her triumphantly.
{Close!} The voice spoke in her mind. {I'm not actually the Valeyard, per se, but I'm the next best thing. And soon enough... you will be too!}
"What's THAT supposed to mean?! Who are you? How can you not be the Valeyard when you sound just like himmm... ah!!!"
Pain. The spiders... whatever it was, spreading, skittering, through her mind...
{Think of me as a Contingency Plan of The Valeyard's... a trap he set just for you, in anticipation of this very spell.}
"He was prepared for my memory spell?!"
{He was prepared for just about all your OTHER attacks, wasn't he?}
Spiders, spiders, spiders, spiders, sharp tiny legs, snapping little mandibles....
{When you cast that memory spell, it's never just for idle reminiscing, is it? You program it to replay the memories as if they were being lived again. The memories that define that person as they truly are. Except it was the Doctor who was discorded, not me. Who I truly am, is the Doctor of Law, a Time Lord Victorious who renders gods mortal and puts mortals on the paths they should be intelligently taking. At this very moment, Twilight, your whole personality is being rewritten into a carbon copy of the Valeyard's! A chip off his block! Cast in his mold! They'll have to call you Vale-light! I'll finally have a companion worthy of me, myself.}
(No....)
"No...."
{All glory to The Valeyard, whose will shall prevail against all opposition!}
"I-I-I'm Twilight!"
{Don't be silly Vale-light. Together we will crush Discord, and bring the reason and sanity to this world you've longed for so long.}
"Twilight? Aren't I?"
=====
Applejack screamed again. "Twilight! What in tarnation's he done to you, sugah?"
Twilight turned away from the Time Lord, facing her companions, who gathered around her in concern. Igh. How truly incredible... she was supposed to continue RELYING on these morons? Have them all rely on her? These embarrassments? These sorry tagalongs? They didn't deserve her, and SHE didn't deserve them. There wasn't a single one among them whom she couldn't think circles around. Hopeless primitives.
Comrades like this would be doomed to fall against whoever Discord sent next. Perhaps it would be better that way... just stand back and watch them kill each other. Or maybe convince them to try warping off to the castle in The Valeyard's TARDIS... then maroon them on some gas giant or other. Yeah. Serves them right for thinking they were worthy of her company. Anyway, it wasn't like Discord NEEDED to be disposed of. Life would go on. In fact, Discord would probably WELCOME Twilight back into his inner circle, treachery of that sort just tickled him pink, and she could celebrate with a nice, ice-cold glass of pear juice...
(As much as I approve of you wanting to be free of the weights off your back, you need to SNAP OUT OF IT, TWILIGHT! This way of thinking isn't like you AT ALL!)
{Of course it's us. Power. Control. Greatness. Unstoppable will. Grand intellect. No need for others. Privy to grand secrets of creation.}
(Daring Do! Books! You secretly like Daring Do and the Crystal Skull when everypony else hated it! Books! Cadence's cheer! Sunshine Sunshine ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake! Books! Applying the scientific method to magic that Earth Ponies think you're strange for! Figuring things out LOGICALLY! Books! Schedules! Beautiful beautiful schedules!)
"My friends."
With a flick of her horn, giant manacles closed around Twilight's hooves, chaining her to the ground.
"Someone! Smash my head!"
{You're joking!}
"You're joking!" Shouted The Valeyard who the stone Roseluck helpfully kept down.
Everyone gasped.
"Quick! I-No! I was kidding, don't smash-Smash it! Now!"
"Twilight-" Derpy started in confusion.
"Stay out of it you braindead idiot!" Twilight yelled in a rather familiar tone then got a half look of terror and half strangely victorious look as Derpy gave a snarl and glare as it clicked in her mind.
{You...you let me say that on purpose!}
'Yep, say goodbye, Graveyard!'
"You're not stealing another friend's body!" Derpy yelled, Element of Loyalty igniting.
"I agree," Rarity stated, snarling.
Apple Pie's eyes were covered by Applejack as Twilight's head was sandwiched between Derpy's Element of Loyalty enhanced hooves and a boulder provided by Rarity.
Twilight's body went limp for a few moments until her head regenerated, appearing momentarily brain dead until her Element of Chaos uploaded her mind into her regenerated brain. "Thanks, he might have been able to upload a copy of himself into mine, but the Element of chaos had a master copy of me."
(I am very happy you're alright Twilight. You're too wonderful a pony to lose.)
Twilight hugged her friends. Who were more than happy to hug back. Twilight felt a sense of relief and joy. They had just saved her soul after she had saved half of theirs."Do you know you're all my very best friends?"
"Of course darling."
Derpy gently broke from the hug and trotted to the still held down Valeyard.
The Valeyard's vision was filled with another mare's face, this one gray with a blond mane.
"Bad wolf." Derpy stated, breaking the Valeyard's neck.
"Derpy!!" AJ was appalled.
"Don't worry, just watch. The ordered fruit on the spinning, Ugh, he can't die. He's a Time Lord. But he always becomes somepony new. He called it Regeneration. He'll show you."
The Valeyard's entire body glowed with a golden light. It actually broke Apple Pie partially out of her stupor. Death and new life were supposed to be on opposite ends of the string, but here they were meeting. They made ends meet!
The Roseluck stone mare backed away as the Valeyard's body glowed brighter and brighter as wisps of light shined until a golden flash of light obscured what happened next.
His still form covered by the cloak, Derpy crept closer and closer, and nudged him, the stone Roseluck doing the same.
"Doctor?"
Derpy was eye-to-point with the unicorn horn, it suddenly glowed painfully bright. The stone Roseluck shoulder smashed Derpy out of the way just as it went off, the stone making up its body atomized into dust.
Derpy gasped. "Roseluck."
"SUCKERS!!!" The Valeyard revealed himself with a flourish of his high collar cape, adjusting his stuffed collar. He had once been an Earth pony, but now a unicorn horn stuck out from his head.
Derpy's eyes quivered. Her mind was spinning in circles. "But-but, duck, rut, luck, where, when, how, bow, house, dog-"
"I have a million regenerations where that came from, and they're all me! Me, me, me!" The Valeyard stabbed himself in the heart with a knife he produced from his cape. Another golden flash, this one much faster than the last one, and he stood exactly as he had before it. "As a gift for my services, the spirit of disharmony decreed that I regenerate INFINITELY! AND EACH ONE WILL HAVE THIS IDENTITY! All this means is that I can change my species to fit whatever situation I want! Sorry Ditzy, I'm the Valeyard, and the Doctor is OUT! And he's NEVER coming back!"
"No." Derpy whispered. She felt a grayness itch at her heart.
Rarity and Applejack looked to each other.
Derpy shook her head, "THERE HAS TO BE A WAY TO SAVE YOU! Just like we'll save Sparkler, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie! And even if it's into Tartarus and out again! I won't abandon anypony!" And Derpy forced out the grayness!
Apple Pie's laugh was heard. "The darker things get, the brighter ya shine, Miss Hooves. What a wonderful contradiction." And the grayness in her ran away screaming. "We're gonna write a happy ending."
-
"No way! No one can un-discord themselves!" Fluttercruel wailed.
"It wasn't 'by herself.'" Discord said sourly.
-
AJ didn't take her eyes off the Valeyard, even as she nuzzled her sister's descendant. Because the Valeyard wasn't taking his eyes off Apple Pie. Her 'happy ending' statement seemed to have touched a nerve.
"Give hope, give hope, GIVE HOPE that's all you do, brat!"
Applejack hugged the little foal, smiling, "That and wipe out zombie armies by SPEAKIN' ta them!"
"You're not the only one who can change species, if need be," Twilight Sparkle said hugging Apple Pie too.
Derpy said, "The Doctor had faith in me to do a good job, so I'll have that faith too!"
"Your desires are as mighty as you are, Valeyard, that is the truth, but the truth also is that the one thing grander than your abilities is your own opinion of them!"
"Yer lyin' ta yerself if ya think not havin' any backup is a strength," AJ told him.
The Valeyard said calmly, "Just go forward in all your beliefs and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine."
He then brought out a new object, something that looked to be a cross between a magic wand and a laser pointer. He turned it on. Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack screamed out in agony, clutching their chests.
"Sonic screwdriver." The Valeyard exposited. "Set at just the right frequency to cause Elements of Chaos to crack, fracture, and ultimately shatter."
++++
"MUTE! MUTE! MASTER!" Fluttercruel screamed rolling on the floor, knocking the snack tray over, tears of pain on her face.
"I HATE THE VALEYARD! IHATEHIMIHATEHIMIHATE!" Angry Pie roared, standing up from sheer force of will even as she bled from every opening in her head.
Discord blew up the speakers and everything went silent. He hugged Fluttercruel, slowly stroking her mane, "There there my dear, there there, everything's okay." Fluttercruel made no response, she buried her face in his furry snake body, shaking.
Why did he feel...angry? More than that, he felt, relief she was all right. These emotions were sickeningly familiar.
Angry Pie looked at the two in disgust, then back at the TV. Seeing the three Elements of Harmony writhing in torment filled her with grim satisfaction.
++++
"Half-Light?"
"Everypony?!" Derpy looked at her friends in concern before taking flight to dive-bomb the Valeyard, who telekinetically lifted a second sonic screwdriver. Spike opened his eyes and let out an agonizing wail, Apple Pie curled into a ball. Derpy felt her head being slammed by a pack of angry sledgehammers.
"And in this corner, we have a spare sonic screwdriver set to give non-immortals permanent brain damage, which won't be that far a fall for you, Ditzy Doo. Oh, and of course, both screwdrivers are set not to damage Time Lords." He knelt down next to her, stroking her mane, "It doesn't matter how many clever ideas you have Ditzy, I'll always have more. But it's okay, you were never a clever pony. So don't feel bad. It's just the way you are. And it'll all be over soon. After a thousand years, you don't have to feel bad about not being clever ever again."
Derpy's Loyalty symbol burned on her body as she pushed herself up, feeling like she was dying. She gritted her teeth, lifting up her wings, her eyes blazing at the Valeyard.
"Oh yes, almost forgot, that bottomless tenacity you and the stupid apes share." The Valeyard hit her over the head with the second sonic screwdriver, her face ate dirt.
"And from the shadows, I shall herd, breed, and cull a better race of horses for their own good. While the stupid gods I shall topple, tear down, reduce to mere mortals that age and die. For I am the Valeyard, my will be done."
Derpy got up again, reaching up for his horn.
"Perhaps you didn't hear me the first time, you'll be brain dead in a minute or two, so just stay down!" He stopped his hoof on her head, making her taste blood.
Her nerves felt like they were eating themselves, the world was darkening. She got up again, panting at the doctor, and flared out her wings ready to charge.
"You've always been slow on the uptake, Ditzy, so let me spell this out for. Everything you've believed in, everything you've put your faith in, everything you've sworn your loyalty to, is the worthless nonsense of children who don't know when to grow up!"
The Valeyard telekinetically lifted her up and THREW her away skidding until she was near the red blade barrier.
"Now ALL OF YOU! Just lay quietly and you'll all be dead very soon!"
They all stopped moving and became still. "See? That wasn't so hard. The end. Seriously, I told you were already defeated. Wait . . . this isn't how long I calculated it would take for you to-"
The Valeyard sidestepped a lightning bolt. Without looking to see his attacker, he fired back a compressed ball of time magic -- a good old 'die of old age in seconds' spell -- it hit something. The dead bodies vanished. In their place was Twilight, a spherical spell surrounding the ground except for Derpy who was still panting, but a spherical force field barrier then appeared around her as well.
"Please brain stealing damage something not want Rarity do to again ever."
AJ grimaced in pain, realizing how many cracks must be in her Element of Chaos now, and wondered if she just added a new one with that illusion. She didn't know what they would've done if Derpy hadn't kept the Valeyard distracted. At least her Element seemed to be holding itself together, for now.
"A shield spell? Really? Being a knight in shining armor, my dear? Don't you know that role is played by colts?"
"I guess there's a little knight in shining armor in me, then, I guess!"
"You're the one whose beliefs are worthless!"
The Valeyard rolled his eyes at Derpy. "HOW original."
"You have no friends! The Doctor has tons of 'em! That makes YOU WEAK!"
"And yet ponies still say 'stand on your own four hooves', 'be independent', 'other ponies' opinions don't matter'-"
"It's contrary! Ah know!" Apple Pie laughed inside the field.
"If friends make you weak, why did your plan just fail because you couldn't concentrate on everyone at once?"
"A simple miscalculation, nothing more."
While Derpy once more kept the Valeyard occupied, Twilight looked to Spike, doing a quick scan of him. His vitals were fine now that either Rarity or Applejack had taken all the damage, he was just too exhausted. She turned and lowered a look of pure hatred at the Valeyard.
"Rarity can you feed the shield for a few seconds?"
"A few seconds! I'll need a little help."
"Don't worry! Ready?"
"Ready!"
Twilight shifted species again, and Rarity knew pain, but she had help to support her and she held it. Twilight meanwhile, using pegasus magic scattered a mass of tiny storm clouds that fired purple lightning several directions at once, frying both sonic screwdrivers. Twilight smirked. "Electric Wave!" she said, after the attack was completed.
"Oh brother! See the horn? I can just replicate BOTH wavelengths with it! There done! And you can stay in that field forever."
Twilight shifted back species.
"And I know YOU weren't telling the WHOLE truth about your infinite regenerations!" Rarity said. "You were mixing truths! Discord's gift has NOTHING to do with all your regenerations being this version of you, Time Lord!"
"Ah felt somethin' was off," said AJ. "Don't forget; deceit ain't just lyin', it's twistin' the truth too!"
The others were shocked at this, and Derpy knew hope.
Twilight asked, "DERPY! THINK! YOU KNOW THE DOCTOR BETTER THAN ANY OF US! How could he be doing this?"
Derpy cleared her mind. And thought. Then thought again, then spoke. "I remember once the Doctor telling, when he regenerated once, he had a piece of himself nearby, and used it as a template to keep that identity."
The Valeyard's eyes widened. He took a trot back.
"Rarity! AJ! Any illusions on him!" Twilight shouted.
"Around his neck!" They said together.
"Derpy get-"
"I am too! No time to argue!" Rarity said.
"Alright!"
Twilight dropped the field. But they didn't fall down in agony.
"How is this happening?!" The Valeyard babbled.
"Friendship is magic, magic is friendship, I have more friends than you, I've had more time as a unicorn than you, I can memorize any spell! And according to the laws of physics: two identical sounds will cancel each other out!" Twilight's horn vibrated. Twilight would have moved Spike out of harm's way if he wasn't so giant, so she settled for his personal protective field.
"Idiot! I just need to step a foot or two out of alignment and that won't work and-hey! Stop mirroring my hoof steps! Fine! Have a land-mine!" Rarity's magic caught it and tossed it towards Rancor's barrier which it exploded on without harming any of them.
Rarity leapt at the Valeyard and grabbed at something unseen around his neck, as did Derpy, clobbering him at once, and PULLED! This broke his concentration for his sound attack. The illusion faded, and a preserved pony's hoof cut off at the handle with a chain going through faded into view. Rarity threw it seconds before it exploded with a resounding bang!
"Now where's the real one!" Rarity snapped.
"HOW COULD YOU HAVE POSSIBLY KNOWN..."
"This entire fight you've had decoys hidden under camouflage! I'm getting to know you! Villains are proactive, heroes are reactive... and adaptive!"
Apple Pie gave a chuckle.
A light flash blinded the ponies as the Valeyard took out a tiny remote.
"Meh. I'll just set off the bombs I teleported inside each of you at several different points in the immediate past via time-travel-before-we-even-met-here. Bye."
Clink/"MINE!"
Zero point five seconds. Stone spears stabbed into the legs of the four other hero ponies present plus one dragon, Apple Pie cried out the loudest.
One point one seconds, a near perfect outline of Rarity's body made of stone formed around her, the rocks pressed so hard together they were solid. It then exploded. Stabbing the Valeyard in several places.
Shrapnel went everywhere, Twilight's shields protected the mortals from worse damage and AJ quickly got to healing them.
A mass of ashes at the center of the blast revealed a much smaller stone sphere, that broke apart revealing the Element of Desire, the ashes gathered around it, and bones, muscles, nerves, hide and fur began to reconstitute.
"AJ! Hide Rarity! I'll teleport her away!"
The Valeyard made a grab for Rarity's Element as it was still vulnerable. Twilight tried to teleport Rarity's Element away, but the Valeyard's horn flickered a moment later calling it back . . . in its place was a stone. Frozen solid on the outside. Super heated on the inside. It exploded in his face.
AJ's illusion ended showing Rarity's Element of Chaos right where it had been all along. And the illusion of the rock next to it Twilight had actually teleported away vanished.
Rarity finished regenerating from the ashes in time to levitate a rock and shape it into a wrist blade around her hoof and stab the Valeyard as he just finished regenerating.
The Valeyard took a step and gasped, holding his guts in with his forehooves.
"You nag, who's inside me?!" The Valeyard hissed, his body shaking like somepony else was trying to control it.
"I told you already, Roseluck's desire to see you stopped is among the most powerful I've carried."
"Never have I had so clingy a companion," the Valeyard growled.
Rarity stabbed him again in a different spot, the Valeyard magically blasted her only for Twilight to bring up a shield. Derpy and AJ together tackled him, together and held his front hooves back, exposing his chest to Rarity. Now that he wasn't an Earth Pony he lacked the super-pony strength they were famous for.
"Now then," Rarity said, "So that's where it is. Thank you, Roseluck." Desire-Fulfilled
"YEEEEAAAAAAGGGH!" Rarity snarled savagely as she then dove with the stone wrist blade and cut open his stomach, to reveal a third heart, grabbed it, pulled, and the false image faded, to be a severed hoof. She tossed it in the air, Twilight hit it with more varied elemental magic than a unicorn frat party not even leaving ashes.
The Valeyard's horn glowed and slammed AJ and Derpy's heads into each other before slamming them into Rarity. At the same moment as they were tossed towards Rarity, Apple Pie used the white unicorn as a spring board, and the Valeyard didn't have Rarity's experience at using her telekinesis at several objects at once and Apple Pie kicked him in the horn, giving him a stinging headache and breaking his concentration.
Apple Pie didn't get a chance to land as Derpy zoomed underneath her.
Using her wings to kept herself aloft as she used all four of her hooves attacking the Valeyard in the face and horn like an angry set of jackhammers. A blooming flower of enraged hooves, focused into perfect clarity. Derpy put everything into those punches, everything.
Every heartless look her mother gave her, every warm hug from her father, every misplaced sympathetic word from ponies who thought she was retarded, her pride as a mailmare, her shame at failing her movers and Winter Wrap-Up jobs, her awe with the Doctor, the love of her daughters, and despair of her endless march, and her deepest wish that she could be with her whole family and this nightmare would just end!
The Valeyard staggered to his hooves, blood running from his pulverized face. He raised his destroyed hooves defensively. "'ow, 'erpy, 'e're 'riends! 'on't 'o 'his!"
"Sorry, I'm the Doctor's friend. You're the Valeyard, the Doctor is out, but he'll be back in soon."
Derpy's did a back flip in the air, her rear hooves kicking the Valeyard onto his rear legs. Element of Loyalty shining bright, her front hooves made a final blow, aimed for both his hearts knowing where each one was. There was a loud sickening, but shamefully satisfying crack.
The Valeyard stood still, shock and disbelief on his face, blood trickling from his mouth.
Derpy landed, landed on her four hooves, wings bent, panting, sweat down her face, her Element of Loyalty flickered out of sight. Both eyes looked straight at the Valeyard.
Apple Pie had felt no fear from the dragon, or her three formerly evil herd mates, but she scooted away from Derpy during her onslaught.
The Valeyard slowly began to glow, he looked at his trembling hooves in shock and fear. The ponies slowly began to back up, Derpy last.
No one made any move to help or hinder him. No one spoke a word to him. They simply watched as this incarnation of the Doctor faded.
The Valeyard pushed himself back up, trotting backwards. Coughing blood and hyperventilating. He began to move towards the TARDIS and with the lion share of his dying strength kicked it open.
He looked at them, his eyes looked like a cornered animal. Then broke into a manic grin.
"Hehehheh. You stupid horses. Don't you know, what is the measure of the hero in a video game to the player? What different things happen to them when the player wins?" The Valeyard laughed his head off as he fell back into the TARDIS. The machine began to hum and churn as the light on top of the blue box slowly flashed.
(Your role is over good Valeyard, goodbye, you will not be missed. There are some things you never get tired of.)
There was a strange grinding noise, vwooorrp, vwoorrrp, vwooorp...
He fell backwards, the body glowing brightly now, holding back the regeneration only from sheer will power. "But are you even the player characters here? Or just the ghosts closing in on Pac-Pony?" The Valeyard flashed, the TARDIS doors closed, and the blue box vanished all in the same moment.
The ponies blinked as if freed from a trance. It had been like watching a train wreck, a sense of alien detachment making them unable to act until the instance had passed.
++++
"Well what do you know? Breaking the 'level boss order' and sending in the wannabe ahead didn't work, too bad," I said, tapping my chin.
When the Time Lord finally runs out of regenerations and dies for good, I wonder whether he'll go straight to Dad... or if he'll be exonerated by all his good deeds as 'The Doctor.' Maybe the Valeyard is already with Dad while the Doctor lives on. I keep meaning to research how the soul of a Time Lord works. Souls in general are confusing things, so it's hard to tell.
"I'm going to miss that blue box. Now where am I going to find room for all my laser discs and VHS tapes?"
"The garbage," Angry Pie said.
"Ha ha ha ha!!!" Fluttercruel grinned. "Did you hear that, Master? Angry Pie told a joke! An actual joke! Let's make her the Element of Laughter again!"
"I'LL KILL Y---" Brick to her head.
"Sorry, girls. With the Valeyard gone, it looks like YOU'll be the ones fighting after all."
"Who's sorry?!"
The two spoke together, glared at each other, and 'humphed' in an echo. Only to then lean right against one another. Cute as a pair of kittens. Ick.
"Fluttercruel, learn from his defeat. Making your opponent angry and trying to wear down their emotions is a valuable battle tactic, but not everyone reacts to it the same way," I told my little princess. "Some go into a completely berserk frenzy and lose track of their reason. But the most dangerous will do what Miss Hooves just did; a calm fury. They have all the advantages of being furious, but keep their reason and clarity. A person in a berserk rage will try to beat you to death. A person in a tranquil fury will try to kill you, but be smart and very thorough about it."
"Doesn't matter when you're like us," said Fluttercruel, rolling her eyes.
"Speak for yourself," Angry Pie said but not quite at her normal rage levels.
"Don't assume your power protects you," I said, looking to my snout where my missing fang once was.
(You will suffer, Discord. For your crimes against Princess Luna and Princess Celestia. You'll suffer for your crimes against Cadence. Again and again.)
. . . you're trapped like me. You're never going to be satisfied. No matter how many times you put me through the meat grinder. It's never going to keep a smile on your face for more than a nanosecond. You're just like me.
(How dare you! HOW DARE YOU!!! HOW DARE YOU COMPARE YOURSELF TO ME, YOU WORTHLESS SACK OF USED ANIMAL PARTS!)
All the power you've gained, everything you've learned. And you're still stuck with the same set of problems. Things have to go JUST right. No one better deviate at ALL from your strict little script... Whoa, now you're beginning to almost get a little scary.
(YOU BUCKING SHUT UP! JUST SIT ON YOUR ASS AND WAIT FOR YOUR NEXT PUNISHMENT!!)
You know, this whole thing is feeling more existential than I'm really used to.
Hello? Heellllooooo?
Well, that's rude.
+++++
Derpy sighed. "Goodbye Doctor, hope to see you, a better you, again." Derpy remembered, all the other companions the Doctor had mentioned who had come and gone. Derpy guessed she was just one more, after all. "Maybe this time you'll finally be ginger," she said with a smile, getting weird looks. "He always wanted to regenerate into someone with ginger-colored hair."
"And with that hoof gone that's the end of the Valeyard." Rarity said.
"She'll take him somewhere safe," Derpy said.
"She?" Twilight raised an eyebrow.
"The TARDIS."
"Ah was hopin' the good him could tell us what 'Valeyard' means."
Twilight said, "'Valeyard' is a word in his native language that means 'Persecutor of the Court' or 'Doctor of Law.' "
"Ya mean he was 'The Doctor' in a way after all?"
"Derpy, what did he mean by all he said?" Twilight asked finally getting to the heart of the matter of the ominous warning.
"I . . . I don't know." Derpy confessed.
Apple Pie spoke, "If ya ask me his message sounded like-"
The crimson blade barrier around the heroes and the palace fell apart, very loudly, very fast, fading into nothing before it hit the ground.
Rancor appeared posed as if she was wearing bluejeans with her paw in her 'pockets' walking forward several feet above them, as normal. "Adios Valeyard. Guy had great passions, but really separated himself from his emotions too much for my taste."
The ponies got ready, forming a defensive formation around Spike.
"Ah don't worry about it!" Rancor waved off seeing their actions, "You're too tired out to give me a passionate fight after that boss battle. I'm just here to say thanks for taking care of the Valeyard. It was only a matter of time before he made his move against Discord during this mess you're making to take the throne and I couldn't let that happen. So you ponies helped Discord this round.
"Oh and ta tell ya, kid, here ya go, you oughta read the last page of the comic. I give my Parents' word, it's a good thing. I don't like seeing such passion burned out." Rancor flew a folded paper air plane at Apple Pie, which folded itself out and connected itself to the comic. Apple Pie hadn't even perceived that the last few pages were MISSING!
Against the advice of EVERYONE (save Rarity), Apple Pie tentative turned over the last page. "And Superstallion faked his death, chose to live out his days as Colt Kent, married Lois Mane and lived happily ever after?" Apple Pie grinned, "Whoo-hoo! See, told you! Yah can write a happy endin' if ya try!"
"Yeah ain't it? Pandora LOVED that one! Just remember kid his happy ending COST him something important. And you've given me a passionate fight by both sides my little ponies, -whoa that's fun to say- your love, your anger, and all of your sorrow laid bare! Now then, ahem, COME! COME TO YOUR DEATHS!"
Thunder crashed.
"Be waitin' at the welcome party! See ya!" And then Rancor vanished.
A plush red carpet rolled out from one of the palace entrances, and rolled, and rolled, and ROLLED miles away from the castle until it rested at the ponies' hooves.
"So we charge in?" Spike said.
"After you rest up, Spike! AJ and Rarity: finish healing Derpy and Apple Pie! Everypony . . . I think we've just been invited in." Twilight said.
Applejack said, "Well, it would be unladylike to refuse."
"Agreed." Rarity nodded. "Let us briefly prim ourselves for our homecoming."
Twilight nodded. Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy, we're coming.
"Miss Derpy." Apple Pie said nuzzling the gray pony. "Ah'm sorry we couldn't save yer friend."
Derpy looked at the filly, remembering when Sparkler had been this small. Saying how easy her mother's job was with her wings, and did her entire route with her on hoof to help Sparkler appreciate the hard work she did for her foal. "We did save'em, he just, can't be with us."
"Okay," Apple Pie nodded, "It's funny, we killed'em, but, that saved'em, not the way ya think it's supposed to work huh?"
"We killed the monster inside him, that's all."
Twilight thought. A thousand years ago Twilight Sparkle would have turned pale and boldly rejected killing anyone or anything for that matter. Rather than zapping the parasprites into dust she had used every other possible solution. After all, they were just innocent animals as Fluttershy would say. Most ponies didn't need to live near the Everfree Forest, where animals 'didn't play the rules' as the average Earth Pony knew them. But Fluttershy clung to her ideals about animals all the same.
Now Twilight knew there were monsters who couldn't be tamed, there were beasts you couldn't safely keep in a cage.
And Apple Pie and AJ as farm girls, both knew there were animals that it was kinder to simply put down.
(Going to make him bleed and suffer as he's done to every other living thing?)
'No. I'm going to, WE are going to make sure he never harms another pony, another person ever again.'
'Was that really you Roseluck?' Derpy thought about the stone pony. 'Roseluck, good-bye.'
'Hang on Sparkler we're nearly there,' Derpy thought wrapping a wing around Apple Pie.
Applejack sat down next to Apple Pie. "Apple Pie...yah know how yah said we were gonna write our happy endin'?"
The filly nodded. "Yeah, we are, right?"
Applejack nodded, thinking. "Yeah...and Ah really think we can...Ah don't know if yah are gonna believe me, but yah know how Ah said Saint Applebloom saved meh?"
"Yeah! Just like she always wanted, right? She really wrote her happy ending!"
Applejack smiled. "Yeah...she did...She saved all of Sunnytown and saved meh...But that ain't all...while Ah was with her, Ah saw other places...other worlds. And yah know what? There were worlds where we beat Discord the first time, lots of 'em...Ah don't know if yah will believe me or not. But Applebloom told me every one of those worlds, the only difference between them is somewhere along the line, someone made a different choice. The big Father of All Alicorns said no choice is meaningless. If we can win in other worlds just by making the right choice, we can win in this one. So Ah think you're right, sugarcube, yah can write a happy ending."
Apple Pie smiled and nuzzled her multiple times great aunt. "Yeah, we can. And Ah believe yah..." The two sat together for a little. "AJ...do yah think Superstallion is real in one of those other worlds?"
Applejack gave a chuckle. "Yeah, Ah bet he is."
"There's the castle Tom, I promise, we'll give everypony their happy ending soon." Rarity looked down at her neck and, nothing? "Tom? TOM!"
Rarity ran back to the ashes where she had been blown to smithereens. Then where she had been shattered into pieces. She prayed the stone mites hadn't eaten him. And finally where Spike had at her own request burned away her flesh to save her. She found him among the ashes.
"There you are Tom. Now stay safe with them." Rarity whispered as she impeded the tiny diamond into the flesh at the base of her neck again using her horn's magic.
Derpy, looked confused. Apple Pie and Applejack understood perfectly however, they knew what it was like to have something as a keepsake to the heart of somepony dear to you. AJ unconsciously touched her precious hat. Sill in one piece. Thank the princesses. After a thousand years she had held onto it and made a million repairs and patches, but it was STILL pa's hat!
"Rarity?" Spike asked worried.
"It's okay Spike." Rarity hugged him, "Don't worry. He's my son. This is just how to be reminded of him. You're my number one dragon."
"'Is'?"
"Spike, if we've learned anything lately, is that I think we can safely say that death isn't the end. Don't fret darling, while we're alive I'll be at your side forever, I promise."
And Derpy understood.
Spike made a small gasp, "Rarity, did you just say... "
The immortal Element of Honesty blushed and took a few trots back. "Erm, that is--. Spike I really do like you and--"
"It's okay Rarity, ya don't need to say it." Spike folded one of his wings around her, and tucked his head inside. He whispered lowly to her in the dark, "You don't need to say it."
Twilight smiled for her family.
Derpy, Apple Pie, Applejack, and Twilight dared take a moment to just adore the beautiful moment between the pony and dragon the four enjoying their own group hug as Rarity and Spike embraced in the evening twilight.
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We begin the fight and immediately The Valeyard takes out both Apple Pie, with a incomplete comic book, and Spike, with really powerful poison. He tries to brainwash Derpy into fallowing his orders but "Jack uses her ability to remove it. He tries infecting Rare with a painful agent, but Rare uses her healing ability to remove it. He tries to use some stone mites but quick thinking removes them. They are able to catch The Valeyard off guard and Twilight uses the memory spell, unfortunately The Valeyard wasn't created by Discord's taint and he leaves a piece of himself in Twilight's mind. Thanks to some interesting encouragement from the mysterious voice, she is able to convince the others to crush her head to get rid of it. Derpy then goes to break The Valeyard's neck hoping that the next regeneration is a nice one but it just gives him an unicorn body. They are all shocked by this but Derpy refuses to give up. The Valeyard then uses his Sonic Screwdriver to both shatter the Elements of Twilight, "Jack, and Rare and cause brain damage to Derpy and Apple Pie. Derpy refuses to give up buying enough time for a plan to be made. Thanks to some info that Derpy remembers from her time with him they figure out how The Valeyard is regenerating back into himself. They active their plan finding the spare limb he hid on himself to stay The Valeyard and destroying it. Derpy then beat The Valeyard into regeneration, he leaves but not before asking them "Are you players in this game or pawns?" The red carpet comes to them it is soon time for the battle to decide weather or not this world will after 1000 years of dark chaos have a happy ending.
1592639
Unanswered questions I have.
Paleb05, who and why are you?
Are you a placebo or some sort of energy balance for this story?
1595004
What? No, I am just a reader of this story.
1595055
Forgive my rude craziness, please. I don't know realize how off I am sometimes. Doesn't excuse my behavior, though.
You give these wonderful summaries and bear witness to this story in a polite manner for being just a reader. As that is the case, I hope you are not feeling ignored or used. I appreciate your summaries. They feel right.
This chapter,if nothing else,has taught me more about Dr.Who than I ever thought I needed to know. So, bravo for teaching me more things about a series I have no desire to ever watch,mostly due to lack of personal interest.
And I hope I don't offend the author for groaning loudly at the ending to this chapter,but I am a firm protester to Spikity as a ship.
Other than that,brilliant chapter as usual. Derpy is very,very,very scary when she starts getting into the fight.
And Kudos to Apple Pie for her first hit in a fight.
1597453
NORMALLY their relationship is impossible, but a thousand years can change a lot of things.
1574706
You're welcome.
1389469 for anypony who cates and hadn't guessed, the latter half of my music suggestions for 'last chapter' belong in this one.
This is why I hate time travel, I'm much better at weaving concepts than I am at sorting pseudo-linear timelike streams.
Honestly, the Doctor is the only intentional time-traveler I like, let alone have any respect for.
1595055 but physics tells us that observation is participation, oh fellow shadow-who-watches
And that's out here in Mundis Mundis where your excellent summaries give us a little foretaste and focus our minds on the story.
...
Have I ever thanked you for doing that?
Thank you for doing what you do, to me you are a part of the experience of this story
I was promised chainsaws awhile ago.... any chance of those showing up, still?
Damn the Valeyard is dangerous, incridbly dangerously Genre Savvy and while not a reality warper, he si as dangerous if not more dangerous then Discord...
I both love and hate genre savvy villains. But I love them more than I hate them.
Jeez. That was hard battle and VERY unpredictable. I dread on the coming battle against Discord's sister, I don't know HOW they're gonna beat her, but I have a few guesses.
I want to see the good Doctor again soon.
Without any challenge or room to grow. Yeah, perfection is boring.
Ugh, you're going to be one of THOSE villains aren't you? The ones who predict and plan for their own retroactive removal from all of existence forever times infinity and it's all part of their master evil plan. The same villain who's planned for an elephant made of bubblegum and doors to barge in with a trumpet that plays piano music.
Observation haki unlocked apparently.
I'm sorry, but that one page undid all of:
Fake page is fake.
9675884
More like INCOMPLETE page. Whatever Happened To the Man of Tomorrow is a good comic!
They ARE incredibly annoying aren't they?