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Every year on Heath's Warming Eve, one pony is alone, always watching other ponies play with their friends and family. He does not know what it is like, for he has been alone all of his life.

But, on this Eve, somepony gives him what he has always wanted.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 6 )

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FlyingBiscuit

FlyingBiscuit #1 · Dec 24th, 2011 · 1 · ·

Interesting... I guess.

flame phoenix

flame phoenix #2 · Dec 24th, 2011 · 1 · ·

Short, and umm... okay.

Skrillex

Skrillex #3 · Dec 24th, 2011 · 1 · ·

too short and unexplanatory..,..try expanding on it IMO this is good material

Skrillex

Skrillex #4 · Dec 24th, 2011 · 1 · ·

ohhh and give him a name

BronyGuy

BronyGuy #5 · Dec 24th, 2011 · 1 · ·

This has some great potential! But as said prior too short, not enough information and It seems rushed beyond repair (figuratively or course) Take some time to go deeper into what happened to this pony (Name please!) As yourself these questions:
What happened to him that made him lose his family?
Why wouldn't he accept any outside help?
Can't think of anything else? Go into how he feels about all of this, because what you've written didn't help very much.
Overall, needs work but I like the ideas presented!

MatsuriDream