We're going to build an exact copy of Ponyville... right over there! We've got less than a minute!
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This story is a sequel to The Visiting Team -- Part I
With the Princesses missing, Ponyville overrun, and Discord nowhere to be found, Twilight takes charge in Canterlot and Sunset teams up with the Ponyville gang, looking for a way to save Equestria, if they can only find it in time...
For more of this series, see: A Canterlot Engagement.
And also check out the entire series, beginning with Not Exactly Friends.
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Starlight
This entire series so far is amazing!!! Absolutely love the work you put into it. Here’s to hope for more to come, great job!
10937416
Thanks so much, I needed that -- I did spend a lot of time thinking about and working on this one, since I needed to get this in place before continuing, and there were a number of choices to make here. So I'm really glad the result was enjoyable for you! Much obliged!
Aw, caught this just before I was about to prepare to go to bed... Time to try FiMFiction on my phone.
...”Her”? Who is... Oh, right. Gotta be...
...Zecora. I’m so used to them being friends with her, y’know?
...I feel that, myself... Though I’m not sure which is worse, being wrong because you suspected the worst, or being wrong because you suspected what you thought was the worst, when what actually was was even worse...
10937367
In the same vein...
...I’m guessing it should say, “our paths should now roam”?
...Is it like Apparating, Sunset? ...No, I suppose not, no mention of squeezing... Maybe it’s more like the Floo...
No Sombra or Chrysalis? Eh, that's fine. Can't really see Cozy Glow become involved without the Crusaders being major assets, though. Let's do this indeed.
Oooh! That means there's more!! Can't wait!!!
...And, done. That ending is interesting... And ominous. Surely, though, with all the work to be put into it now, Rainbow Power must be used more often, yes? Though they were a cash-grab tie-in, I did like the forms... When I actually saw them... Hadn’t seen past Season 3 for a while, y’know?
Well, that was an enthralling continuation...and that tidbit at the end is definitely interesting. Great to see this story is continuing onward...and that this timeline has apparently become self-sustaining.
12 keys huh? Right now, the AP and ponyville group consist of just 11 members if you discount cheese, spike and grubber. Who is the lucky number 12? Cheese?
10937416
This! So much this! I honestly think this might be my favourite series on this site.
10938081
Thanks much! It's a real shot in the arm (and the keyboard) to hear when my stories work that well for readers.
To be honest, I'm not entirely happy about the girls from Ponyville STILL becoming Elements. It feels like downplaying the members of the Research Group and saying that, despite the good work they've done, they aren't the 'right' ponies for the job.
10938229
That's one of the reasons for the split between the Ponyville effort and the group in Canterlot -- it's a way of showing that each of the two groups of ponies has its specialities, and neither is dispensable.
And they bring it all together at the end, where it takes all twelve ponies to reactivate the Elements this time. (The two-track plot in Part II also nicely avoids the need, in the original, for Zecora's all-too-convenient Alicorn Potion of Narrative Infodump...)
Ooh, I like this twist on the familiar story! I especially like your explanation for why Zecora speaks in rhyme. Great start!
Trixie Luna Moon everybody!
There's a reason there are stories that make her princess.
Also to be honest I saw the Zecora thing coming, the mane six actually did grow themselves now that I think of it
10938252
Ah yes, the Alicorn Potion of Infodumping. That never really made sense, even in context. I definitely like your alternative better!
Ah, 12 keyholes hmm? I wonder what'll happen. I bet Tirek won't get any help from Discord since he's feeling a bit remorseful at the moment. So, he wouldn't be as powerful as canon Tirek. Or is it? Maybe Sombra will pop out or Chrysalis. Maybe all three of them will pop out?
This just gets more and more interesting.
An excellent work as always.
Hmm again nice foreshadowing and I'm not talking about the box.
I'm talking about foreshadowing with Trixie considering that little tid bit with the moon in Luna's chambers. I have a very good hunch where this going.
Another great entry to this series! Thanks for the hard work, and I'm really looking forward to where this is going.
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10939029
Thanks! It helps a lot, hearing that I'm keeping you interested, and providing value for your time spent reading. And yes, the foreshadowing is deliberate. We'll be paying that off soon...
Four overpowered unicorns and Trixie
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Um, who turned Rarity's mane green? Trixie just doesn't put all her cards on the table, that's all...
10939843
Yeah no I know Trixie has nothing if not potential.
Btw how come changing hair color is so impressive. Couldn't you have used the example of the rainbow tornado? That was actual light
This is strange, in the story there are three F's, but when I copy it for the comment, there's only two F's in effort.
"
Ohhhhhh and the plot thickens! Really impressed with how you made things happen here, tidbits from canon blended seamlessly with what you've written. Looking forward to reading more of this timeline
Auhgh, hmmm...
Alicorn magic is absent, what do? You need that for the potion, you know... The divination?
Oh, OH, I JUST freaking REMEMBERED. Elements are INERT, they are not ALIVE. God damn you, Discord, and Nightmare. Nightmare foled history in half, making ponies invent harmony field, and Discord created the vines.
Ah, Tempest. Always one step ahead. I like it. X)
The excitement
I'm curious how Pinkie and Cheese will get their keys, seeing as Pinkie's key came from when she and Cheese got into a battle of who the better party-pony was and when she learned that making ponies smile was worth more than being the better party-pony, she recieved the rubber chicken Boneless who turned into the key for the box.
Now, we got BOTH Pinkie & Cheese trying to recieve their keys, for the SAME Element, might I add.
Others may be interesting, but theirs is what connects with canon. Can't wait to see, great story.
11041701
Thanks much! Cheese and Moondancer are interesting cases here, in that neither of them is a traditional "villain" antagonist in canon, but more a prompt for a main character to realize something about themselves. (For Pinkie, it was that making ponies happy is more important than "beating" Cheese. For Twilight, it's that to "fix" hurt feelings, it's first necessary to validate those feelings, to show they're properly understood.) Which makes writing them a challenge, since it's necessary to invent more of their backstories and motivation. And yep, coming up with a valid "key" epiphany for each of them is equally challenging. But challenge builds character, right?
What a great alternate universe! Thoroughly enjoyed every bit of it.
10937789
Same here.
Weird seeing them being distrustful of her.
12 keys.
Damn...thats gotta be an even bigger arc in itself.
Absolutely love this 'verse. The APG is THE dream team. Was great to see them get together and solve problems in their own unique ways.
10937827
Seems more like a Root Walk spell, to me.
Can't wait for series 3.
She said the thing!
Love the phrasing.
Can't wait for the next one in this series
Im enjoying this AU but how did we get from the previous story to here?
11416420
The previous story (also a two-parter) was
Who Needs Enemies, have you read that? What seems to be missing for you?
11417184
I just didn’t get that discord basically had complete triumph. What was he really trying to accomplish? I just felt like you needed a the next day with twilight to ram home that he’d destroyed her circle of friends.
11417205
Discord basically envies Celestia's role as Twilight's "teacher", because he thinks it's all about respect and being smarter than everypony else and so forth. And yet, even in the series, he can never quite get round the fact that it's about what the student needs, in order to learn and really grow. (As a contrast, witness Twilight's own near panic attack, while trying to decide where to send Starlight when she "graduates".)
So Discord only thinks he's "won" here, proving himself a better teacher than Celestia. When actually he's just made a Celestia-sized mess of things, nearly destroying Twilight's carefully-established bond with her new friends. And it's only that bond with her friends (both canon and Advanced Projects variety) that helps her sort out the mess, and show Discord what he'd missed all along, that her new friendships are just as valid as the canon ones.
At least, that's my take on it!
So... Is this gonna be continued up to Tirek and further? Would be interesting to see THAT company take on all the problems.