The Quills and Sofas Exquisite Corpse

by The Red Parade

Chapter Seven (Lofty Withers)

“What do you mean you’re leaving?!”

Vapor Trail rolled over, covering her ear with a leg. Too early to leave. Can’t help Sky Stinger if we’re falling asleep.

“You can’t just abandon us!”

Midnight Strike didn’t abandon us. He betrayed us.

“We need you, Daring Do!”

Daring? That’s not—Vapor Trail bolted upright. “Angel Wings! No! What are you doing?”

Angel turned, one hoof still raised to strike while the other held Daring by the shirt. “She’s betraying us, just like Midnight Strike did. I heard her talking on the radio when I awoke. Then she started packing her things.”

Vapor glanced at Daring and saw the resignation on her face. “Why?”

Angel yanked Daring around, tossing her to the ground between them and pointing a hoof. “They said something about teaching us a lesson. I couldn’t make it out.”

Vapor stood and walked to Daring. Looking down, she asked, “Is this true?”

“I’m sorry,” said Daring. “I can’t help you any more.” She turned to glare at Angel. “I work alone.”

“Does that mean you’re going to rescue Sky Stinger without us?”

“It means we’re done.” Standing slowly, she walked to Angel, turning her face to provide a clean shot. “Go ahead. Take a shot. It won’t change anything.”

Angel vibrated with fury. The moment passed, and she turned away. Then swung back around.

Vapor was quicker, launching herself at Angel, knocking her down and pinning her to the ground. “Angel, no!”

“You’re just going to let her fly off?”

“She doesn’t matter. Sky matters. He still needs us.” Vapor held her gaze on Angel until Angel looked away, the tension draining from her body.

“Whatever.”

Daring offered them each a hoof up, but Vapor brushed it away. “I’m sorry, but it’s time for me to go. Good luck.” Turning away, Daring grabbed her things, then looked back one last time. “Remember your training.”

Vapor watched until she was nothing but a speck in the sky, fighting to hold back the tears.

“Come on,” said Angel. “Let’s get the tracker and find where they’ve taken Sky.”

Vapor nodded, not willing to trust her voice. She grabbed the lodestone by the band that held it, slipping around her neck. Her sleeping mat and blanket were quickly rolled, folded, and packed back into the hidden cache. Wolfing down two granola bars, she pulled out a picture of her first day at the academy with Sky Stinger. I’m coming for you, she promised.

Less than ten minutes after waking, Vapor stood beside Angel, ready to depart as the desert sun slowly lifted above the horizon. She glanced one more time in the direction Daring had flown.

“Hey. We don’t need her. We’re Wonderbolts.”

Not yet, she didn’t say, instead lifting the lodestone pendant so it dangled freely. Ever so slightly, it pointed back towards Las Pegasus. Leaping, they lifted into the air, catching the growing thermals to soar as they drifted into the city.

Drawn by the lodestone, they surveyed the city in ever tighter circles. Vapor finally pointed towards a warehouse in the industrial district. They banked away, travelling back out to the edge of the city before turning around, shedding height and gaining velocity as they barreled back towards the warehouse, just above the tops of the offices and warehouses. As they cleared the near side of the building before their target, they flared their wings, slamming to a stop and dropping to the roof.

Trotting to the far side, they crouched behind the lip of the building. Angel took out a pair of miniature binoculars, peering through them and into the row of windows along the side of the warehouse. “I see two of the hedgehogs. No sign of Sky. Or Midnight.”

“I see them. Look. There’s Grubber. I think he’s got the tracker.”

Angel swung her binoculars around. “Confirmed. That glow makes it stand out like a storm cloud in a clear sky. What do we do now?”

Vapor bit her lip, thinking. “If we go in without knowing where Sky is, they might move him before we find him. Let’s surveil the place for a while. Maybe they’ll move him while we watch.”

The hours ticked by. As they watched, they traded the binoculars periodically, until the sun beat down from the noon sky and Vapor could tell which hedgehog would win the current hand of rummy just from their tells.

Angel shifted to face vapor. “This is going nowhere. Maybe we should get the Wonderbolts.”

“I can’t risk that.”

“We can’t risk not doing that. We’ve been betrayed, abandoned, and hit an impasse.”

“Grubber is moving.”

Angel shifted back. “Let me see.” She reached over, taking the binoculars.

Stepping outside the warehouse, Grubber waited, checking his watch, until a pegasus swooped down, carrying several brown paper bags, exchanging them for cash.

“What do you think is in the bags?” asked Vapor.

“Lunch. That pegasus has a name tag from Quislings.”

“The sub joint? Maybe they’ll feed Sky and we can see where they’re keeping him”.

As the delivery pony took off, Grubber turned right towards them.

“Flank,” said Angel as they dropped below the lip. “Did he make us?”

“Hey, girls,” called Grubber. “Care to join us for some lunch? It’s on me.”

“He made us.”

“What do we do?”

Vapor lifted her eyes above the lip.

Grubber stared right up at her. He smiled, lifting the bags. “Guaranteed fresh, or your money back!”

Vapor ducked back down, sharing a look with Angel. “Still have those smoke bombs?”

Angel touched a pocket on her jumpsuit and nodded.

“That’s our escape plan. Let’s go see what he has to say.” Standing, Vapor pushed off the edge of the building, dropping to the ground with just enough forward momentum that she landed across the street, right in front of Grubber, with Angel landing just behind her. “Thank you for the invitation. We’d be delighted to lunch with you, wouldn’t we, Angel.”

“Oh. Yeah. Definitely.”

Grubber smiled. “Well come on in, then. Mind getting the door?” He led them through the warehouse to the table where they’d been playing cards. “Guys? Make room for the ladies?”

The giant hedgehogs glanced at the Wonderbolt Trainees, at each other. One stood and moved around the rectangular table to sit beside the other.

Leaning closer to Vapor, Grubber whispered, “You’ll have to pardon them. They’re real friendly, but also real shy.” He swept his hands towards the table. “Have a seat.”

Angel took her seat, but Vapor lingered to ask, “Where’s Sky?”

“Please. Lunch before business. I insist. In fact, it’s even in my contract.” He pulled out wrapped sandwiches, glanced at the markings, and distributed them around the table.

Vapor unwrapped then stared at hers. “How did you know I liked burnt avocado?” She glanced at Angel’s. “Or Angel and banana peppers?”

Grubber held out a finger in pause as he chewed and swallowed. “It’s my job to know. And I’m good at my job. Ya know?” Again with that smile. Vapor wanted to wipe it off his face. “So what’s it like? Being a ‘bolt?”

“Oh, we’re not bolts. Just candidates,” said Angel, earning a glare from Vapor.

Dismissing the notion with a wave of his hand, Grubber rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. Apart from the minor formality of some ceremonies, you two are basically ‘bolts.”

Melancholy overtook Vapor. “Not after this week.”

“Come on. You girls did great. If I know show business—and I do—it makes me a lot of money—you’ll have Wonderbolt pins on those jumpsuits in no time. Unless… unless you wanted to work for me?”

Angel nearly choked on her sandwich.

“The Wonderbolts aren’t just show business, Grubber,” said Vapor, slamming a hoof on the table. “We protect Equestria. From enemies foreign and domestic.”

Lifting his hands, he leaned away. “Hey, peace. Look at me. I’m a terrible host. I just said lunch before business, and here I am ruining it. I’m sorry.”

“Apology accepted,” said Angel, still chewing. She swallowed. “You have anything to drink around here?”

Aghast, Grubber slapped his head. “Oh my Storm King. Where are my manners? Of course. Crumpet, would you get these ladies something to drink.”

The stoic hedgehog stood, easily twice their height. He waited.

Grubber leaned in. “What’ll it be? Water? Juice? Hard cider?”

“Water.”

“Cider.”

Vapor turned to glare at Angel, who rolled her eyes. “Fine. I’ll take a water too.”

“Crumpet?” asked Angel of Grubber as Crumpet walked off.

Grubber waved it off. “It’s just a nickname. So. Being in the Wonderbolts? What’s it like?”

“Grueling,” said Angel between bites. “We train like, twenty-five hours a day.”

“Twenty-five, you say?”

Angel bobbed her head. “I swear they manage to squeeze in an extra hour for training every day.”

Vapor stared, blinking. “You really feel that way?”

“Well yeah,” said Angel, still chewing. “But it’s all worth it to be near friends like you and Sky.”

“And Midnight,” whispered Vapor.

Silence befell the warehouse.

Crumpet returned, setting out the drinks and retaking his seat.

“I’m not hungry,” said Angel, setting down and pushing away her half-eaten sandwich.

Crumpet looked around in confusion.

“No, Crumpet,” said Grubber. “It’s nothing you did. I’m the one who convinced Midnight to betray his friends. You can blame me.”

“Speaking of,” said Vapor, glancing at the door to the small office in the corner of the warehouse, “where is he?

“He’s in a safe place. Along with Sky. My boss has plans for him.”

“Your boss?”

“Smiling Mask. She and the boys went on a trip.”

“Where?”

“Not yet,” said Grubber, pointing to Vapor’s uneaten Sandwich.

Not looking, she scooped it up, raising it and taking a bite while she continued to glare at Grubber, chewing angrily. Swallowing, the intensity of her glare deepened.

“Alright, sheesh. I’ll get down to it.” He reached down and pulled up two bags, dropping them on the table with the clink of coins as they spilled out. “Two hundred bits each. Walk away. Forget any of this happened.”

Angel reached a hoof towards her bag, but Vapor slapped it away. “We want our friend back.”

“Don’t you mean friends?”

“I said exactly what I meant to.”

Nodding his head, Grubber snapped towards Crumpet. “Didn’t think so.”

Crumpet reached behind himself, grabbing two much larger, sturdier bags. They weighed so much that, when he dropped them on the table, the whole thing shook, making Angel and Vapor jump.

“Two thousand bits each. You want your friend back? Join me. That’s your signing bonus. You could make a lot more money with me than in the Wonderbolts.”

Angel whistled. “That’s a lot of bits, Vapor.”

“You can’t buy our loyalty, Grubber. You have to earn it. And you never will.”

Grubber clapped his hands together. “Excellent! There’s just one last thing, then.” Reaching inside his vest, he pulled out two tickets, tossing them out on the table. “Smiling Mask’s plans will be revealed at the Gala, ladies. That’s where you’ll find your friends, too.”

Vapor picked up her ticket, flipping it around as she examined it.

“It’s just a ticket. Not a snake.”

Vapor turned her attention back to Grubber. “Why are you doing this?”

“It’s just another job. Now, if either of you blabs about the Gala, I will not be held responsible for what happens.” He tapped his nose. “Mum’s the word, and all that.”

Vapor stood, walking towards the exit.

“Hey, don’t you want your sandwich?”

Vapor flipped him the primary.

Grabbing her sandwich, Angel hesitated, staring at the bits spilling out on the table.

“Come on, Angel.”

With a sigh, she flew after Vapor, taking another bite as she did.

Grubber turned to Crumpet. “That went well. What do you think?”

Crumpet shrugged.

“Don’t give me that. They’ll be fine.” He turned, catching a last glimpse as they exited the building. “They passed.”

———

“I’m sorry,” said the mask, removing her namesake. Her hair poofed out. “I didn’t expect him to take the money.”

Rainbow closed the case holding the Wonerbolt pins and sighed. She’d only need three of them now. “It’s not your fault, Pinkie. None of us expected Midnight to turn. This prank was a stupid idea.”

“So, he’s out of the ‘bolts for good?”

Rainbow nodded, pain covering her face. “Yeah. Failed the final test. He can keep the bits, but he’ll never be a Wonderbolt. You can’t just carry on after betraying your friends like that. I gotta break the news to him. Also need to tell Sky he’s not actually a prisoner.”

“Maybe I could cheer him up with a party?”

“Yeah, no. ‘Congratulations on betraying your friends, here’s your party hat?’ I don’t think that’ll go over too well. I just need to talk to him.” She called across the room, “Hey, Cinch!”

A moment later, Cinch’s head appeared in the door. “Yes, boss?”

“Could you bring in Sky to see me?”

“Right away, sir.” She ducked back out.

“If there’s a silver lining in all this,” said Pinkie, “it’s that Grubber’s theater troupe has done really well. I totally believed they were an organized crime gang.”

Rainbow snickered. “That’s because they are.”

“Wait, what?”

Cinch burst back into the room. “He’s missing! They’re missing!”

Rainbow bolted out of her seat. “What?”

Pinkie donned her mask, becoming, once more, the dread villain Smiling Mask. “Well, Dashie. It looks like, once more, the game is afoot.”

Comments

[PresentPerfect]

I'm less concerned with the rug pull at the end than I am the idea that Midnight seems to have undergone gender reassignment since the previous chapter. XD

I love "flipping the primary" though.

[SigmasonicX]

Figured that after The Smiling Mask got that name that they'd eventually turn into Pinkie. Didn't expect this prank twist though. Oh that Pinkie, what a jokester, torturing Sky like that.