I'm just a guy trying to learn the craft of storytelling through daily practice. Unfortunately, I can't seem to do anything "normal", so I'm writing porn.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2023 Hasbro Inc.®
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I'm liking where this is going
For this being your first story, I love where this is going. Keep it up.
Oh this is nice
First chapter and so far I already like it
Fucking oof, Ditzy didn't deserve that
I got this reference
I'm enjoying this story but the Randomly capitalized Words are giving me A Headache.
Seriously, man. I keep having to stop and wonder if I missed a period or something. You want emphasis? Use italics. And even then, consider doing it more sparingly. It's like, the only big flaw in this story . . . and not the kind that enhances beauty, I'm afraid.
I've been on this site for a long while now, read a lot of stories, so to sound like an arrogant fuck, lemmie say this is one hell of a story you got here. Keep this shit up, this is good shit.
Came for some good smut
Stayed because im now invested in these characters
Good job fam
I'm definitely routing for Ditzy at the moment. Fantastic story!
thumbs.gfycat.com/InferiorOffensiveFlycatcher-size_restricted.gif
I wholeheartedly approve
Anime?, no. Cartoons, HELL YEAH
que extraño, este parrafo seria algo con lo que me auto describiria, literalmente, si me parece interesante, lo hago y sigo haciendo, si me parece aburrido, que se vaya a la mierda
An eccentric man named Buck, huh?
Hmm...
I'm likin' this.
It's "THAC0," Adagio. The last part is a zero, not an "O." Unless you're playing For Gold & Glory, an AD&D 2nd Edition retro-clone that changed the acronym (for legal reasons) to "To Hit A Combat Opponent."
I'll probably read this later but I was looking for a second person fic and this isn't a second person fic. Can you please remove that tag?
Kind of a shame, honestly.
You really enjoy twisting the knife in when it comes to Ditzy don't you
10960540
I absolutely can. Thank you for catching that mistake.
10962661
No problem. Keep up the good work.
10951505 To be fair, when you write a self-insert to the degree this author has, you tend to subconsciously write for yourself. Still, it is a rutt that should be worked through, certainly.
Also...
...Derek ne mera ketreta na rera.
Well this is taking a rather bizzare and interesting turn of events !
Also I must say i genuinely enjoyed listening to the lullaby and frankly buck is a man i genuinly aspire to even approach w#to being like when it comes to d n d !
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, PLEASE NO MORE HAHAHA THIS CHAPTER WAS SO FUNNY I LAUGHED UNTIL MY RIBS HURT, ahh I’m good, regardless great chapter( probably the best one yet) looking forward to seeing what you write next and please, get someone to make an animation of the yo mama jokes section I would PAY to see that!
man I hope scoots actually gets fucked
I hadn't considered how the EQ universe's mythology would be strongly influenced by Equestria. To the point that the default 'D&D' races are ponies rather than elves. That is super cool.
Also, did Buck actually cast sleep on Starlight? Between this and his outburst causing the magic 'ping' it seems to hint he has some actual power to him.
Lastly, if this is heading to Scoots getting fucked so hard she can't walk the next day... I'm here for it.
One complaint, it was a little hard to follow the scene changes early in the chapter. It seemed to jump several days without the slightest break. Not sure if a line or pagebreak didn't transfer over to Fimfic. Or maybe reading on a phone messed something up.
The more I read this fiction the more I like it.
The humor, the few references.
The story is very interesting with well-developed characters, Adagio whose feelings for Buck change over time, and Buck the nice guy whose life has never given gifts but who seeks to be better for others.
What to say other than good work and continue like that I would follow the rest with pleasure.
this was a rather interesting chapter truth be told, i feel starlight has crossed a point though of no return though but in fairness adagio seemingly was quite terrible but now she seems like a genuinely good person in her own bizarre way. im certainly interested to see where you take this for sure and thank you for the great work !
10962661
man i like dagi in this very much what i nice late birthday treat im not gonna lie when dagi was in the ally way with the red eyes and the grin and dagi chasing him in the 2nd chapter or so.....had a fear boner.....i wasnt sure that was even possible.....
...i like fear boner
question how would adagio react to someone that has a crush in romantic sense on her and is a virgin in his 30s with similar hobbies like buck whos not ugly but handsome either ......asking for a friend no ulterior motives what so ever no siree bob
honestly this chapter feels like the start of new obstacles and the breaking down to a degree of old ones. I don't think i said this before but i really enjoy your characters that you've created there weird bizarre wacky and unique and seeing the way prose and sunburst act together genuinely makes me smile and think of some of my own friendships. I am definitely interested to see how and even if the whole ditzy and prose thing works out. all in all a wonderful chapter and I'm certainly looking forward to the next one !
………why did I have a gut feeling that shit was going to hit the fan? And for all it’s worth FUCK YOU STARLIGHT! I NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY
Yeah only double the size of the next largest one, god damn.
Kinda? I think it would be fairly interesting and I'll always be up for some more of your writing, but honestly I'm much more interested in seeing this story to the end before a side story gets written.
This story legit keeps getting better and better, I've enjoyed every single chapter thus far and I have no idea how you write such compelling stuff. Keep it up fam
Ah, a fine enjoyer of the show.
11007718
To be fair, Starlight is exactly right about Adiago.
11009355
Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that she is acting like an asshole
11009573
Fair enough.
ok... ahora siento que estoy en los tipicos H que leo cuando es hora... lo que hace que esto se mas caliente de lo que pense que seria... y eso que pense muy morvosamente este trio
Well, shit just went from bad, to worse, to FUCKING HORRIBLE in the span of about 5 minutes, what’s up next I fear to think of. But I look forward to the next chapter……. (Now dash owes me 10 bucks hehehe)
Ah no amiga mia... o deberia decir ENEMIGA mia! Tu. NO. HARAS! NADA EN CONTR DE BUCK! ENTENDISTES!El tipo es una pancake suave andante, es un pedazo de pastel amable y cariñoso que esta lleno de amor para dar a su querida ¿novia? y tal vez para Scootaloo... y para ditzy... bueno, ella fue demasiado paciente... demasiado amable... espero demasiado y perdio a buck... eso y la relacion entre Buck y ditzy no iba a durar, a el creo que le gustan las mujeres fuertes e independientes (igual que a mi) y ditzy... aunque independiente y fuerte a su manera, no es material para Buck y buck Realmente se saco la loteria
I feel bad for everybody
except Starlight, I know she's right but this ain't it chief, this is just you being a cunt despite being told numerous times not to beWonder if he'll end up with Derpy.
ok.... Ditzy esto se esta saliendo de control, no es culpa de nadie que Buck y adaigo se hayan enamorado, y yo TheMurderleo prefiero que no dañes tu relacion amistosa con buck solo por unos celos irracionales
Mierda! todo va mal contra Adaigo porque nadie entiende que Adaigo comenzo con buck por comida pero al final se termino enamorando...
Starlight Humana sigue siendo mala cuando se refiere a relaciones sociales y la cago muy mal, ademas, no aprendio a perdonar (aunque se entiende porque ¿que humano perdona a alguien que casi lo deja en silla de ruedas?)
Buck... no vayas con Ditzy, adaigo te necesita, y tu la necesitas a ella
Y autor, aunque me encanta la historia, porque tiene que haber tanto drama! maldita sea, es una pena que el amor sea sacrificado a cambio del drama
Well that escalated quickly at the end
Okay Mandy!
The amount of references in this chapter is glorious! God I miss playing DnD.
oh how the turns table !
I really enjoyed this first chapter. The characters are well written, the dialogue is engaging, and the plot seems interesting. I'm starting to doubt that this is your first story.
It certainly lacks a bit of polish and could use an editor, but for its shortcomings, there is a lot to love here.
I'm a bit of a slow reader (in fact, I rarely read at all), so I don't know when I'll catch up or finish this, but it's definitely worth the read and I'm glad you wrote it. Keep up the good work, boss.
I'm not a big fan of romantic FanFictions but something about this fan fixed it keeps drawing me back and I'm just sitting like a Hermit waiting for the next update
Love it so far, but please tell me Scootaloo wont be depicted in anything explicit. I know shes aged up and a fictional character to boot but I guess 10 years of knowing her and the others as kids has triggered a kind of dad mentality. It just make me uncomfortable. Anyone else get that way or am I just weird?
Yay! Happy ending!!