• Published 6th Jul 2021
  • 2,680 Views, 30 Comments

Rockets and Friendship - Spooples

[RGRE] A team of thestrals on a mission come across a stallion in the woods. A strange, jingoistic, and very much vital to the mission stallion.

  • ...

7. Blossom

”Rainbow Dash, ya haven’t stopped wriggling yer’ eyebrows at us for the last twenty minutes. Are you going to tell us what’s on yer’ mind or what?!”

Your ears flatten at the grating sound of the Element of Honesty’s voice.

”Oh, come on! Do you gals seriously not get it?!”

Ah, can’t forget her closet dyke friend, now can we? You stifle a snarl as you keep your eyes on the dirt path below.

”Pinks! Back me up here! You get what I mean, don’t you? You’re picking up what I’m putting down?!”


All of them, redback bastards. May the blinding sun stain their backs the deepest shade of red until the end of their lives.

”Hehe… Sorry, Dashie, but I’m really out of it right now…”

The Elements of Harmony are bastards. Each of them. Underneath their grand talk about friendship and their fancy necklaces and tiaras are six bastards who would leave three ponies for dead.

Yes, you’re talking about yourself, Soldier, and Spy. Because OF COURSE you went after Soldier, and OF COURSE you flew until you tore a wing.

”U-um, Pinkie Pie, I think what Rainbow Dash is trying to say—”

”Why, Pinkie Pie, darling, there’s no need to act so coy! We’re speaking of Jane!”

”…Ohhhhh…. hehehe…”

…The buck do you mean 'of course'? The Elements were your mission, weren’t they?

Slowly, the anger starts to fade into numbness. Your hoofsteps slow. Yes, the Elements were your mission. But you went after Jane.

”Alright, Ponka, here’s the deal,” Dash says in a whisper, though still just as loud as her normal voice in your ears. “You trot on over to Jane and give ‘im a slap on the ass, and these twenty bits are yours.”

”AHAHAHAHAHA!” Pinkie bursts out laughing, her voice still loopy from the pain spell Twilight gave her out of one of the few shreds of kindness in her black heart.


Luna, the moment you see that mare again you’re breaking every bone in her muzzle…

…No, still not feeling it.

The anger’s gone. You just feel empty now.

”Dashiiiiieeee~ You know I’m an old-fashioned filly! I’ll only slap him on the rump if he asks nicely!”

”Alright, then don’t slap him on the ass, just trot back there and ask if he needs any help!”

”I can barely walk myself, Dashiiiieeee…”

”C’mon, Pinks, you just gotta -----------------”

”…Dashie, that was so stupid I made the author go back and delete it.”

Your hoofsteps eventually crawl to a stop, and you’re standing still in the cool dawn breeze. The Elements continue down the dirt path, soon followed by the rest of your team as they swerve past you so as not to collide. None of them make any move to stop next to you.

You don’t blame them. Not with the way you reacted to them once you crawled out of that cave.

”Dash, jus’ give it a rest, would ya? Pinkie’s obviously not in the mood.”

” DO YOU GALS NOT GET HOW SERIOUS THIS IS?! We finally found a stallion who’s a good match for Pinkie! When will she ever get another shot at this?!”

”…N-not gonna lie, that kind of hurt my feelings, Dashie… (sniff)”

As the sole conversation between the fifteen ponies in the Foal Forest devolves into angry arguments and hasty apologies, the last set of hoofsteps of the group approaches from behind.

It’s uneven, accompanied by the faint drips of blood, so you know exactly who it is. Still, you can’t even muster up the energy to tell Soldier off before he stops beside you.

You don’t make any moves to speak. Neither does he. How much time passes with just the two of you sitting on the dirt path leading to the Canterlot-bound carriage, you don’t know.

It’s long enough that the hoofsteps and voices of the group fades to nothingness even in your ears.

Suddenly, Soldier’s voice seems to cut through the silence like a hot knife. ”Gee, if only there was somepony here who could help carry Spy the rest of the wa--!”

”YES!” Rarity nearly screams as she emerges from a nearby bush you hadn’t noticed before. “I WILL TAKE THE UNCONSCIOUS PIECE OF HANDSOME HORSECOCK—Erm, my apologies. I will assist the gentlecolt.”

With a purple glow, Spy is gently levitated off Soldier’s withers and into the air above the white unicorn. Rarity hums a happy tune as she bounds after the rest of the group, a sway in her hips and a bounce to her step.

You don’t react.

"Permission to confide, ma'am?" Soldier pipes up.

Like a creaking door, your head slowly turns towards the stallion by your side. His bloodshot eyes stay glued ahead, and there is a subtle sway to his normally steadfast stance.

"Permission granted,” you hear yourself say.

Soldier, to your surprise, gives a hint of a grateful smile before his lips tug back into a neutral line. "...Ma'am, I've been fighting wars as long as I can remember.”

You blink.

“And if there wasn't a war going on at any time, I'd start one for the Hell of it! Familial war, romantic war, international war, it didn’t matter to me. I love War, the honor, the simplicity, the respect! For some it might be terrifying, but for me it's exhilarating! Does that make me a freak, ma'am?"

The only sign that Soldier’s question was directed at you was that you’re the only pony in his vicinity. Otherwise, he may as well have been talking to himself as he stares in the distance.

"It's not normal,” you shrug. “But then again, nopony is. Some would call that fearless."

What are you doing, Midnight?

"...Well, I'm not fearless,” he chuckles a sad chuckle. "I'm terrified of peace! Of other people, who aren't holding a rifle by my side or pointing one at me! God sure does have a wicked sense of humor, huh?”

Another chuckle, this time quieter. Soldier stays silent for a while, as if unsure of what to say next, before he slowly turns toward you.

What you see in those eyes, you’ll remember for the rest of your life.

”The truth is I'm not good with this mushy, interpersonal stuff, so... listen," he says. "I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. I know I have a hard time figuring out how I’m making other people feel around me. Hell, all this time I thought Merasmus and I were pals!” You can see the pain in them as Soldier wills his eyes to not break contact with your own. “I really did… So, if I'm ever making things hard for you or any of your team, or annoying you, or making you want to become an evil wizard with plans to tear the world asunder, I want you to tell me."

…Stop this, Midnight.

”I don’t want this friendship to end up like—” he continues, but you finally will yourself to put a stop to it.

“We’re not friends, Jane," you say quickly.

The words sting as they leave your mouth, much more than the smoky remains of Merasmus’ grotto. After a brief second of shock, your words seems to have a similar effect on Soldier as the stallion physically recoils from you.

“I appreciate all your help, Jane," you say quietly. "Really, I do. And you’ve got heart. I’m sure the Solar Guard would really benefit from having a stallion like you, but…” You can’t look into Soldier’s blue eyes anymore.

Cloud Skipper’s eyes were blue as well.

“You’re here because of the Nnuelg’un’,” you say neutrally, numbly getting to your hooves. “And only the Nnuelg’un’. So after we reach Canterlot, and you and Spy explain yourselves before the Princesses and Elements… we’re strangers.”

It’s done.

The rest of the trot down the dirt path continues in silence, the only sounds Soldier’s hoofsteps behind yours, and the chirruping morning wildlife. Even a half-committal “Understood” from the militaristic stallion would’ve made you feel less like guano, but Soldier doesn’t make a sound during the rest of the trip.

…That didn’t fix anything.

The more you trot in silence, and the more of the Canterlot carriage you can see in the distance, surrounded by the rest of your group waiting for you; the more the anger in your chest blossoms.

Twilight Sparkle. The mare who never wanted your help, and never once relented enough to make it easy. Who, despite all the accolades Celestia showered her with, was as useless in battle as a pup fresh off the teat. The mare who destroyed the resupply locker, and who left with her friends when there were three other ponies who needed help.

The mare who's responsible for Jane’s current state.

And, as suddenly, as it comes back, the anger is gone. Just the crushing emptiness remains.

”There you two are!” Twilight Sparkle pipes up.

“…Stop talking, Twilight,” you whisper so quietly only you can hear it.

Of course, it does nothing to dissuade the unicorn as she trots up to you. You crane your sore neck upward to look neutrally at Twilight as she approaches. Behind her, two pegasus stallions from the Solar Guard stand by patiently beside the carriage, no matter how much Applejack and Rainbow Dash flirt with them.

”What took you so long?!” Twilight continues as she trots to a stop in front of you, blocking your path. “I told Princess Celestia all I could via a sermonem-longius spell, and she assured me her finest medical staff are waiting on standby for our arrival!”

Jane gives a nod of acknowledgement as he passes you and Twilight, headed for the carriage.

You make a move to follow him but are stopped by a certain purple unicorn.

A purple unicorn that makes getting on your nerves look like child’s play.

”Princess Celestia also told me that Luna wants to have a word with you and your team,” Twilight says in a tone so sickeningly apologetic and sweet it makes you want to puke. You also can’t help but notice she left out Princess Luna’s hard-fought and earned title.

“Noted,” you grumble with another step towards the carriage.

This time, Twilight stops you with a hoof to your tuft. It takes every ounce of restraint in your body to not break it right then and there.

”Oh!” she says. “And, um… if it isn’t too… private, what were you and Jane talking about back there?”



”It’s nothing to do with the mission, it’s just…" Twilight stammers, sitting on her haunches to tap her front hooves together. "Well, um... what is it called… uh, a little mare-to-mare talk! I was thinking about it, and... well I know I could've done things a lot better back there. Everything just happened so fast, and I'm glad you and your team are okay! So, I want us to part on good terms, so I, um... Oh, I read about this, how does it go again?

She's either making fun of you or the pupil of Princess Celestia is a stammering marecel.

You clench your jaw, chewing each word as they slide between your teeth. “What. Are you. Talking about.”

Twilight reacts with a flinch and an innocent smile. ”Oh, there’s no need to be angry! W-we can just skip to the mare-to-mare talk, okay? Y-you see, the gals and I have been talking, and… well, actually, we haven't, but I was wondering myself because I'm the de facto leader and all..." Twilight leans forward, weighing nothing on her hooves as if weighing two heavy objects, and holy Luna you've never wanted to buck an autistic mare in the face more than right now. "I wanted to... ask Jane if he… would want to start a herd with us? And I’m just making sure with you, because I wouldn’t-want-you-to-get-the-wrong-idea-or-think-that-we-were-trying-to-steal-your-stallion-away andwe’realreadytryingtosetJaneupwithPinkiesoIthoughtit’djustbemoreconvenientifwewereallaherdtogetherandwithyouandhimbeingsocloseandallIthoughtit'dbebettertojustaskyouandhopefullywecouldbefriendsinthefuture-- This is how social situations work, right?”


You hoof slams into Twilight’s muzzle with a satisfying crunch. Her head swivels left and right for a moment before her eyes roll and she falls to the ground in an unconscious heap.

You barely have time to savor the sight of her blood leaking out of her broken muzzle before the Solar Guards tackle you to the ground.

SHUT THE BUCK UP!” you scream at Twilight’s unconscious body over the sounds of the rest of the Elements of Harmony’s surprised shrieks and the aching pain of the armlock you’re put in. “SHUT THE BUCK UP, SHUT THE BUCK UP! I’M SICK OF IT! I’M SICK OF YOU BUCKING COWARD, REDBACK, DAYDWELLER HORSES!”

Did you just hit Twilight?!” you hear Rainbow Dash shout as her cyan hooves are in front of you in an instant.

”Step back, Ma’am,” the deep, sickeningly smooth voice of the Solar Guard says from above. “We’ve got her under control.”

”UNDER CONTROL?!” Ah, there’s that gruff, jingoistic voice you were waiting for. ”Why, I turn away for ten seconds and the most stoic member of my team suddenly has a cop's knee in her back like some ‘innocent jogger!’ What the Hell’s the meaning of this?!”

”Captain Midnight Blossom is under arrest for assaulting an Element of Harmony," the Guard responds matter-of-factly.

”So she’s going to jail?!”

”Yes, sir.”

”For hitting an Elements of Harmony?!”

”…Yes, sir.”

Soldier blinks at the Solar Guard on top of you before his eyes shift down to your own. Shame burns at your cheeks, but the position the Guards have you in doesn’t let you look away. Soldier’s eyes narrow in a contemplative expression before he looks around frantically.

Finally, his gaze settles on Rainbow Dash, standing right beside him.

It takes her a moment for her mind to compute that Soldier is looking at her hungrily, but when it finally does compute, she takes her shot. ”Heh… Like what you s—”


Rainbow Dash goes down in an unconscious heap of cyan and rainbow.

”Yaaaay!” Soldier cheers just before he’s tackled to the ground by a Guard. ”We are going to be together forever!”

For the longest time, the only sound in the dank dungeon is the steady dripping of the puddle in the corner increasing in size.

The stench of old shit and unkept mold no longer makes you scrunch every time you take a breath, but it does little to acquiesce the equally moist and stuffy air. You keep your eyes glued to the cobblestone ground below your stone bed, refusing to even acknowledge the other pony in the cell.

“You’re not making this any easier on yourself, Captain.”

Even if you don’t see it, you can hear the way the Solar Guard’s lips curl into a sneer as she says “captain.”

In one ear, out the other. Just like all the other times.

“A member of the Night Guard strikes an Element of Harmony during a mission in which her express instructions are to protect them… and she refuses to disclose why. You know, it won’t just be you who takes the fall for this. The entire reputation of the Night Guard will also suffer.”

You’re disgusted that you don’t feel even the slightest pang of regret at that. Still, you keep your attention on the gray floor below, wondering just when this good-cop-bad-cop spiel will switch to the nicer counterpart.

What was her name again? Cookie Crumble?

You like Cookie Crumble.

“…Oh, you think I’m the bad cop, is that it?”

You let out a sardonic snigger before looking up at the Solar Guard…

…and it’s then that you realize you don’t know why you did it.

“Celestia bless your poor lawyer,” she mutters under her breath as she clops down from the metal chair.

With a yellow glow, the chair follows the Guard as she approaches the open door to the cell. Before leaving, the Guard places the chair in the corner of the cell.

”Leave them,” the Guard says as she trots down the corridor perpendicular to your cell, quickly followed by two other sets of hooves as the Guards leave with her.

You ears perk as you hear a heavy metal door creak open somewhere down the hall.

And then, another voice speaks up.

”Is she well?”

Your blood stops pumping when you hear that voice.

”As well as expected, Your Majesty,” the Guard says. “She refuses to eat or sleep, but—”

”Thank you, little one. That will be all.”

Your heart can’t decide to be as still as a cave mouse or to beat as quick as lighting as the dark blue alicorn emerges from the grimy depths of the jail, into your own cell. Each of her hoofsteps on the cold cobblestone send a delicate, yet firm, clack echoing through your head. The eternal abyss of the night sky, both beautiful and frightening, shines through her mane like an ethereal mist.

And then, the one thing only a pony with the honor of being in her presence could notice: the sweet smell of rain and petrichor radiating off her.

“Princess Luna…”

Your voice breaks. Your voice never breaks!

W-why did it have to break now?!

But you can’t help it.

All you can do is hope the thunderous and rapid beating of your heart doesn’t annoy Her Lunar Majesty.

…She still hasn’t said anything.

You would never hold it against Princess Luna to not say anything to a lowly thestral like yourself, but a small part of you is a little annoyed that the last words spoken before this impromptu silence were violated by a schoolfilly voice break.


That was it, wasn’t it?

She’s disappointed that a Night Guard Captain couldn’t keep her composure enough to--

“How are you feeling, Midnight Blossom?” Princess Luna asks.

Of course she wouldn’t be disappointed about something as trivial as that. The depth of Luna’s mercy and patience put the deepest oceans on Equus to shame. “Good," you say with no small relief, "Now that you are here, Broodmother.”

You chance a small smile at Princess Luna, raising your bowed head to meet her eyes—

She’s not smiling back. She’s frowning. “I’m told you struck the Element of Magic."

You flinch, even if Princess Luna’s tone is patient and inquiring. Hot shame floods your face and bosom. You stare at the ground, ears drooping like dead leaves. “Yes," you murmur. "I got too emotional.”

“You?” Princess Luna questions in earnest. “Emotional?”

You don’t know whether to be flattered that Princess Luna would know you that well, or to be all the more mortified that she does. “It wasn’t befitting of a Night Guard Captain,” you finally opt to say.

Luna’s cyan eyes pierce into every follicle on your body as she studies you. “It’s befitting enough of a mare protecting her stallion’s honor, wouldn't you agree?”

The hot shame is gone. Now you just feel cold. “Jane is not my stallion.”

Luna blinks at your sharp tone of voice.

…Y-you didn’t mean to…

“…I-I apologize,” you nearly whisper. Princess Luna merely continues to transfix you with her gaze. “What happened to Jane, if I may ask? He also struck an Element of Harmony.”

“He was released after the full report was given to the Guard.”

Of course. Stallions don’t go to jail.

“…You are right about striking Twilight Sparkle not befitting the status of Night Guard Captain,” Luna resumes, and your attention immediately snaps back to her. “But tell me, do you think your actions during the rest of the mission were any better?”

Here it comes, Midnight.

“No," you murmur, bowing your head shamefully. "I’ll take full responsibility for that fiasco of a mission. The Elements are aware now of our helping them. I accept whatever punishment you deem fit.”

“Is that all you believe went wrong, Captain Midnight Blossom?”

You open your mouth to respond, before slowly closing it. For the life of you, you can’t find the words you think would appease her. With the uncertainty of a pup stepping on thin ice, all you can mutter is, “…Yes.”


And with just one word, you make yourself find the words to appease her. “Besides Jane interfering, I followed Night Guard code to the best of my ability for every situation I found myself in.”

Luna lets out a forlorn sigh before her horn glows.

The dirty, scuffed, unworthy chair in the corner of the room is enveloped in a cyan glow before floating over to the both of you.

You find yourself stuttering, “P-Princess, you don’t have to stoop—"

”Hush," she says.

You immediately comply, bowing your head. Still, the sound of the chair squeaking under Princess Luna’s weight sends waves of anger through your system. You’ll hunt down the carpenter who made that chair and make her pay for even insinuating Her Lunar Majesty is overweight.

“You know how--… Well, Celestia is a certain way with her valued student,” Princess Luna starts. “You’re lucky you aren’t in the deepest pits of the Canterlot dungeons. It took a lot of convincing from me and a certain other pony to have you placed here.”

“I’m sorry, Princess," you whisper. "And I thank you. Whoever from my team helped you convince Princess Celestia, I am in their debt.”

“Nopony from your team stepped forward to defend you, Midnight.”

Your eye twitches.

”…At least at first," the Lunar Princess muses. "It was Jane who stepped forward and defended you, despite the Guard trying their utmost to keep him back.”

Your surprise is only doubled when you hear Luna’s giggle filling the room. “He reminds me of the stallions I knew a millennia ago.”

There’s that cold feeling again.

Here she is. Princess Luna. Her Lunar Majesty. The Broodmother.

Fawning over some colt. It doesn’t befit her, not one bit.

“But that is besides the point," Princess Luna continues. "No, Midnight Blossom, your actions during the mission were not befitting of a Night Guard Captain. Refusing Silhouette’s comradery at every chance—”


”—How you handled your team while you were all trapped in that grotto—”

Wait, wait, wait. This was never brought up by any of the interrogators.

”—and refusing Jane’s friendship.”


“Have you been spending too much time with your sister?” you growl. “Those are hardly on the same level as striking an Elem--”

You immediately stop talking once you regain control of your mouth. Your blood runs cold as you force your head downward, away from Luna’s gaze. However, even as you stare at the cobblestone ground below, you can practically feel the icy glare Luna sends your way.

”Elaborate," she says simply.

This isn’t the Luna you knew. This isn’t the Princess who visited you in your dreams. Who comforted you. Who was a stalwart imitation of traditional Thestralian virtues.

This is somepony else.

You lift your head up to meet Luna’s glare with your own. “I may know Silhouette personally, but when in the context of a high stakes mission such as that, our relationship is irrelevant. Besides, she never—”

Another exasperated sigh, strong enough to derail your train of thought.

Your eye twitches with annoyance. You did everything right, didn’t you? Despite all the guano that was thrown your way, you did the best you could, didn’t you? “I kept calm and commanded to the best of my ability despite my injuries in that cave.”

“Is jerking a pony with a broken wing from a mound of stones your idea of keeping calm?” Luna asks matter-of-factly.


Voice slurred through your gritted teeth, you respond, “My wing was also broken, and I wasn’t crying like a spoiled pup.”

“No, but you did hit her like one.”

“I’m not a failed alpha!”

You didn’t mean to say that. Why did you say that?

Luna is giving you a look that boils your blood.


“A-and what the buck do you mean refusing Jane’s friendship?” you stammer. “He was an Unknown to begin with! He was only there because he won the Nnuelg’un'!”

“Jane didn’t hesitate to risk his life—”



Luna just used the Royal Canterlot Voice.

On you.

You hate this. You hate every second of this. This isn’t the Luna you envisioned.

You did everything right.



Princess Luna cuts through the silence with a cold voice. “If this is how you treat every subordinate assigned to you, Midnight Blossom, maybe you shouldn’t have any to begin with.”


Luna doesn’t yell at you for raising your voice. She doesn’t strike you or send in the guards to discipline you. She doesn’t even send you to the Moon in exile.

All of these, you would’ve preferred over what Luna actually does. “All this time dreaming of becoming my personal Guard, and you’re willing to give it up just like that?”

The rage… changes.

The frustration, the anger, the bitterness…

They change.

They’re not gone completely. The burning sensation doesn’t evaporate. It moves from your chest to your throat. Your eyes sting with tears, and all you can feel is a crushing sorrow.

…No. That’s not the right word. It isn't sorrow.

Don’t cry.

Don’t cry, Midnight Blossom.

Don’t let it creep into you again. Don’t feel it.

What can you do to distract yourself?


You can do nothing.

You’re useless, Midnight Blossom. Useless now, just like you were back then—

Don’t cry.

You clench your eyes shut, turning away from Luna.

Don’t cry, Midnight Blossom.

You’re a mare. You’re a Night Guard Captain. You’re going to become Luna’s personal guar—

No, you aren't.

Not anymore.

And it’s all your fault. You’re so useless.

You jolt as something warm envelopes you. Your eyes snap open, but all you can see are the navy blue feathers of Princess Luna’s mighty, ethereal wings as they wrap around your pathetic body. You can feel Luna’s steady heartbeat against the back of your head as she murmurs a question that breaks something inside you. “When was the last time you cried, little pup?”

As the first tears of many streak down your cheeks, you respond, “When I wasn’t there to protect my husband.”

Your last attempts at staying strong are pathetic. You sniffle as you stubbornly try to wipe the tears from your cheeks with your forelegs, but warm, gentle hooves stop them. The world blurs as Princess Luna’s hooves pull you into a tighter embrace. All you can feel now is Luna as she holds you tightly, a gentle hoof brushing through your mane.

Before long, sobs rack through your entire body as you cry into Princess Luna’s chest.

You can’t help it.

The moment you close your eyes, you’re in another time. Multiple times, all at once.

The time you first laid eyes on that impossibly cute pegasus in the Solar Guard, who wouldn’t give any of the other mares the time of day.

The time you completely bucked up during your flirting while sparring with him, yet he just laughed and called you adorable.

The time he caused every head in the restaurant to swivel towards your table as he laughed at the very thought of having children.

The first time you held him in your arms during one of his panic attacks because you were stupid enough to put candles around the bed, forgetting all about his fear of fire.

The time you practically persuaded him under duress to start a herd because of the paralyzing fear of leaving him alone while serving as a fangbearer.

The time he pulled you into a crushing embrace before your departure, and how hot your face became when the rest of your team hooted and hollered.

The last time you saw his face.

On the cover of a cold newspaper, delivered just hours before you were supposed to be formally informed.

”Stallion Gives Life to Save Foals from Inferno.”

The first time your herdsisters said you weren’t there for him.

The first time you were called a failed alpha.

The last time you saw your herdsisters’ faces before you left them without even a goodbye.

“Your grief has blinded you, Midnight Blossom.”

You can’t respond through the convulsive sobs. You can only feel the pain of your past failures crush you as you blubber into the Princess of the Night.

”I know, little pup. You try to toughen through it at first, as that is what’s expected of a mare."

You open your mouth to try and speak –- to at least try to be worthy of being in this merciful, compassionate goddess’ embrace –- but nothing escapes your mouth. Nothing but a wordless wail of grief, shame, and pain.

“But eventually, this toughness turns into anger and bitterness, and will turn you into something unrecognizable.”

You lose track of time. Eventually, through the pain, you finally lose yourself to the simple warmth of being in another’s embrace. Your choked sobs soon subside, replaced with the occasional sniffle and a low purr you didn’t even know you were capable of. Princess Luna is ever patient, never once pushing you away or grimacing at the tears and snot soaking her chest tuft.

All you can manage is a simple question. “…How will I ever be able to repay your kindness, Broodmother?”

Princess Luna peers down at you and tilts her head in a beautiful display of relatability.

“Am I out of the Night Guard?” you ask tentatively.

Luna’s face gently changes into a solemn, motherly smile. ”I tried to do more.”

“You’ve done more than enough, Your Majesty!” Your voice breaks with emotion, even if all your tears have been shed.

Instead of responding, Luna simply runs her hoof through your mane once again. How she ever decided you were worthy of this kindness, you’ll never know. ”With your help, Midnight Blossom, perhaps you can start to repay my kindness.”

“Of course!” you puff your tuft out like a recruit, eager to please. “Anything.”

”Your trial is coming up shortly, wherein your official punishment will be decided. Your rank within the Night Guard is forfeit, that much is certain. But with your cooperation, little pup, I’m certain I, along with your lawyer, will be able to persuade Tia to punish you more leniently. Do you have any concerns with this?”

Your head feels like it’s spinning before two questions become clear in the chaos.

You gently lean away from Luna. She gets the signal immediately, unfurling her picturesque wings to let you settle back onto your bed.

“Two, Broodmother,” you say with a respectful bow. “Firstly, what punishment do you have in mind?”

There is a brief pause, and for a heart-stopping moment you wonder if this was just a cruel dream your sleep-deprived mind concocted for you. But it is cut short by a giggle from Luna.

”My apologies, little pup. I was just thinking that you may be right. I have been spending much time with my sister.” You peer up at the Princess of the Night, breathless. “…If you want to return my kindness, Midnight Blossom, then I must ask of you something not much different from what Princess Celestia once asked of Twilight Sparkle, years ago. I will ask Tia to relocate you to Ponyville. My sister is a… how do you say?” A cheeky side-long glance at you, once again so surreal in its simple relatability. “…Sucker for lessons in apologies and forgiveness. So, I have no doubt she’ll agree in this arrangement. But that is not my only reason. “

Princess Luna turns her full body towards you, and you suddenly feel very tiny. ”Midnight Blossom… I urge you to confront your grief.”

Your breath catches in your throat. Your eyes sting, but no tears fall. Your head falls downward like a stone as you once again stare at the floor, but a navy blue hoof reaches into your vision and cups your chin.

As Luna tilts your eyes back to her face, she continues, “If you want to repay my kindness, do not ignore your festering feelings any longer. Do not bury your pain. And by every crevice on the Moon, do not. Blame. Yourself.

You can barely begin to register Luna’s kind smile as she bends down to your eye level. ”You will not be alone in this endeavor. I swear it on every star in the night sky.”

All you can manage is a faint, “Okay…”

Luna gives a determined nod before standing back to her full height. Your eyes stay glued on where hers once were. ”And your second question, Midnight Blossom?”

You flinch out of your stupor. “O-oh, right. Well, it’s not really that important, it’s just… who is my lawyer, exactly?”

Luna opens her mouth to respond before the ungodly sound of heavy metal twisting from blunt force permeates through the dungeon.


All you can do is stare, slack-jawed at Luna as the sound of what had to be at least three Royal Guards struggling in vain to keep one set of stalwart hooves as they made their way to your cell. Luna’s only reaction is a faint twitch of her lips as they threaten to draw her mouth into a shit-eating grin.

The panicked pleas for the stallion to stop and the hard stomping of the stallion’s hooves near your jail cell until Soldier rounds the corner. Three Royal Guards straining to keep a hold on his body, wearing a three-piece suit already tearing at the seams to keep his monstrous physique within, and adorning a grin that puts Celestia’s sun to shame.

”Hello, Midnight Blossom!” he chirps, waving a hoof frantically to you. “Didn’t I tell you? I’m a licensed, experienced, and damn awesome lawyer! Jane Doe, attorney at law, at your service! OORAH!”

You can’t help it.

For the first time in years, you burst out laughing.

Luna soon joins in, lifting a hoof to her lips to try in vain to keep her giggles in check.

Soldier also howls with laughter, although you’re not sure he even knows why.

This is going to be a trial for the history books.

Comments ( 17 )

Ahh i was wondering when this was gonna be added into here. I have read most of it from ponepaste and hoped it would be added. Now it is and i can read it almost at every update it gets.

Im curious and am always on the look out for different ways of writing...Do you find writing in greentext easier then typical prose? For that matter...is it rather different?

Thank You for your time.

It's pretty much the same difficulty-wise. What matters is actually writing, regardless of style :twilightsmile:

I DONT EVEN KNKW WHATS GOING ON BUT I LOVE IT! I wanna see the mane six burn in hell tho.

This is my new favorite thing on this site lmao


I need more. I need you to stimulate my eyeballs with your screen words right the fridge now.

A bit of clarification: this story isn't canceled. I'm just focusing on my other stuff at the moment. It will be continued soon, probably in a few months :pinkiesmile:

“A few months” huh.


Don’t worry, the last chapter was as good an ending as any.


This is a rampaging carousel of tonal whiplash. Somehow it works.

One moment you have team fortress 2 meme-ery and fourth-wall-breaking second-person narrative, the next moment you have a serious-as-cancer widower confronting psychologically crippling gender norms and going through a mental health crisis.

These two ingredients from opposite ends of a spectrum make the sort of forbidden pie you could only get away with in fanfiction. An editor from the professional writing world would slap you upside the head and tell you to pick one or the other, but not both. You somehow pull them both off well and I look forward to the next chapter!

This has been a goofy ass story so far, and yet several times you've played it entirely seriously even with soldier running the damn show. Good on you.

Is this going to update, it looks interesting!

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