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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I want to off myself after reading this, and I think that's the effect you were going for.
If that is the case, bravo.
10883021
Oh God. No. No! My story was NEVER ment to make you commit suicide. No, that was not the case!
I was drawn to this story because of the description and the tags. So I thought okay this sounds interesting. Then I saw the chapter title and I thought it sounded even more interesting. I thought the writing was good there were a couple of typos and grammar errors but not that bad.
Then I started to read the story and it was hard to make sense of the story mostly because of Discord being presented as weak and helpless.
I know you were going for comedy and it kind of fell flat. Having characters from the show out of character can work and then sometimes not it depends on how it's presented.