sunsetshimmer_13
Joined 12th Jan, 2020 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Deergenerate · 1.9k words · 50 21 · 2k views
- LILDASHIEGRINGO · 16k words · 35 6 · 1.5k views
- sunsetshimmer_13 · 5k words · 13 5 · 2.2k views
- PegPony · 6.8k words · 33 24 · 1.2k views
- dermuffinmeister · 13k words · 30 12 · 985 views
- KingdaKa · 13k words · 59 11 · 1.4k views
- Kiernan · 12k words · 54 32 · 2.2k views
- Nagiman · 5.6k words · 43 11 · 1.4k views
Featured In15
Shipping 💖11,669 stories ·9,737 members
Clopfics11,545 stories ·15,811 members
The Writers' Group56,384 stories ·9,291 members
Twilight Sparkle12,269 stories ·4,753 members
NSFW3,903 stories ·1,373 members
Futaquestria2,536 stories ·6,257 members
Anthropomorphics7,624 stories ·5,017 members
The Shameless Self-Promotion Bureau49,217 stories ·5,457 members
Stats
Page generated in 0.116 seconds
Total duration
899 users online
1,276,370 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Ah, and so another author enters the magical world of incest fiction. Welcome to the family.
And I can already hear Shakespearicles running to read this story. =P
10922159
I didn’t think this day would come
10922167
Lol xD
Idc if this is incest at the moment...
yayy ANOTHER FIC!
10922204
If that makes ya happy get ready for the next one dropping soon
It’s not M rated but still
10922167
images2.imgbox.com/40/fc/eDbGG55S_o.gif
10922249
I’ve officially impressed the one n only bard
SHAKESPEARICLES
10922249
That .gif never gets old.
There you are!
10922159
Phrasing!
👍
10922303
♥️
"Sweet Home Alabama-"
Thank you for doing the story I asked for. I hope you didn’t have to go too far outside of your comfort zone, and still got to try something new. Definite props for just getting started writing this type of relationship. And I like what you’ve done beyond just the base things I asked for. Shining crossdressing is fun, and I like the idea of him exploring it with the ponies close to him. That being said, I do think that the execution could be improved. The main thing is, the pacing feels very rushed. Much of the dialogue and setup feels very bluntly stated, merely there to get things going as quickly as possible. I think adding more descriptions and allowing the story to breathe now and again might have made it feel more natural. The characters as well might’ve been given a chance to display their motivations and thoughts through actions and experiences, rather than having the exact things they’re doing explicitly narrated. Especially the opening with how it just spells out word for word what Shining is doing is frowned upon but he gets off to it. More subtlety could have vastly improved this story, especially one with such ideas within it. At the end of the day though, I’m glad you wrote this. I hope you continue to write in the future, and hone your craft. Especially, if you have any questions or comments about my review, I’m happy to listen and answer.
10928309
Thx for the criticism and I hope you still enjoyed this story.
Now I know things felt a little rushed it’s just that I was really trying not to fill up the hard limit on the event, I was really hesitant a bit when getting up to 3.8k words in here. As for the whole show don’t tell argument I’ll be trying to show more via dialogue and characters actions. I’ll be sure to try and keep those things in mind.
Thx for the constructive criticism and I hope you still enjoyed my take on your story request of the Summer Sin event.
If you have any more tips for me for future stories such as believable romance or character arcs or how to stretch things to a certain degree lemme know in PMs
Have a nice day
10928322
Thank you for the reply. And yeah, I did enjoy your take on it. It was interesting. I probably would be willing to give feedback in the future too it you wanted.
You have a nice day as well.
10928756
Sure
I would enjoy someone to critique on some of my future stories from time to time
Make sure to stay tuned for more story plans of mine
10928841
Sounds good.
>Shining Armor had urges no stallion ever felt before, like femdom
You're not as kinky as you think you are.
10935247
I tried my best so oh well
Normally, I downvote incest, but since it's you, I'll make an exception.
Still not reading it though....
10940968
Thx I guess
This was mostly for Sumner Sin event here
Who made the cover art?
I'm here for the incest, I'm downvoting because it's rushed and the dialogue is clunky.
10986085
I cannot stress enough how proud I am that you actually read this and gave a critique
Some if not a lot others who doesn't like it just dislike it and never say anything