• Member Since 4th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen Oct 11th, 2016

DimDough


Sweet Doughnut Pony with stars in her eyes and frosting on her mane

T
Source

Colgate hosts a slumber party to show off her new Pony Haystation console, but the only ponies who show up are Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie. Being a scientist, Twilight decides to get close and personal with the one of the contollers, and ultimately gets herself in a bind (quite literally), while Pinkie feeds everypony with some suspicious sweets, making sure that this night will be special for Twilight and Colgate.

PS. I would like to thank Mr. Tangent for his funny little picture that gave me the fic's idea in the first place!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 71 )

... What did I read?

I don't even know how to react at this... but here, have a mustache: :moustache:

1235147

Well the idea behind the picture was to write a clopfic.

But I'm not into clopfics you see, so instead I did some kind of a stupid clop-parody. :derpytongue2:

If it made you smile at least a little bit, then my mission here is complete! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

PS. Oh, and don't forget to brush your teeth! If your teeth are sparkly, you'll get a snuggle from me! :heart:

1235171
Read it, got a smile, loved that, good story. also, something you missed.

"She obviously has broken a sweat while struggling with the evil power cord."
has should've been had.

1235171

I liked it! Have a thumbs up and a moustache. :moustache:

Also, favourited.

1235204

I also thought about this when I read the title.

1235229

Thank you very much for your correction, Miss Tamara Bloodhoof! :heart:

You see, I'm not a native English speaker and I am still learning, so please feel free to point out my mistakes! :derpyderp2:

PS. To keep your smile sparkly don't forget to Brushie Brushie Brushie your teeth! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

:pinkiegasp:
....
Moar.
Because.
Moar

Okay, half of my reaction was :derpyderp2: and the other half was :rainbowlaugh:
Good job there, now I have a reason to brush my teeth even more! :pinkiehappy:

1235171

Well, you deserve at least a thumbs up, aside from the mustache i already give to you. And yeah, for a parody for clopfics, is ok.

P.D.: Just finished lunch, i brused my teeth :pinkiehappy:

1235240
The term is "Play Stable". Not Play Station :pinkiecrazy:

...Why doesn't this have more readers?

Short but fun, laughed quite alot.

Stupid Sexy Twilight indeed. :twilightsmile:

1235316
>And yeah, for a parody for clopfics, is ok.

S-should I add the information that it's a clopfic parody to the description? :derpyderp1:

>P.D.: Just finished lunch, i brused my teeth :pinkiehappy:

Friendly snuggle incoming! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_bedroomeyes.png

1235344

Thanks for the heads up, Mister Joy Stick! I'll change it right away! :derpytongue2:

1235384

No, keep that info as a secret. I think this kind of things work better when they aren't totally expected. But, since there isn't the "Romance" tag, al the clever observing people out there can figure it out.

But i still think you shouldn't say that.

1235378

Because it was posted just one or two hour ago at most. Give it time...

1235393
You are very welcome. You might as well read my first story. Which has a Play Stable... :pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy:

1235397

For some reason I read that in Pinkie's voice.

And lol, didn't check the publish date, just saw it being added to a group, explains it all xD

1235409

For some reason, i was thinking in Pinkie Pie while writing that lines. Even thought putting some pun, like "clevery-clever Mr. Clever-Pants", or something like that.

1235204 1235231 Yes, when I saw that title too, my first reaction was "Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all...nothing at all...nothing at all..."

1235515

That's the effect I wanted you to experience, everypony! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

Oh, and just look at that amazing cover picture by Mr. tg-0! Twilight really has nothing on (except for that evil power cord)! Nothing at all~ :twilightblush:

Stupid Sexy Twilight, agree :twilightsmile:

And everybody forgot about Pinkie again! Well, she will have her revenge. Coming up next: Stupid Sexy Pinkie, now with 100% more chainsaws.

"throbbing PonyStable controller"

what have you done

1235983

It's just a joke to make my parody look like your usual run-of-the-mill clopfic. The same goes for the "glistering and inviting darkness of the console port". dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_bedroomeyes.png

It's a comedy, remember! Don't take it seriously~ dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

1236016


THE IMAGES

Bucking amazing.:twilightblush::twilightsmile:

Okay...so...I only have one question. Was that supposed to imply that Twilight got herself into that predicament on purpose? :rainbowhuh:

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1236081

Thank you very much for your kind words, everypony! This is my first fic ever and it's so heartwarming for me to get such a nice reception! A friendly snuggle to all of you! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_bedroomeyes.png

1236089

That's the best part of almost every story -- you get to be a co-author, and only you can decide in your head what it was all about! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

Everypony knows that Twilight could be a bit nerdy and socially awkward sometimes, but we also all know that "it's always the nerds that are secretly sex fiends" to cite a brilliant story by Mr. Friendly Uncle, so it's really up to you in which light to view this, Makokam.

Awright Sparkly! Your silly story is getting some serious readers! Well done!

I lol'd! You did a great job! Congratulations!

:pinkiehappy:

1236192

Twifight Sparkill! Aw thank you so much for finding time to check out my silly story! :heart:

And boy am I glad that you liked it! Please tell everypony on mIRC channel too, I kinda feel urge for more apples... :applejackconfused: I mean more readers! :derpytongue2:

PS. Oh, and after you eat a pony cupcake, don't forget to brush your teeth! You crazy psycho, you! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

1236209

I'm sure I'll see you in mIRC again soon, Sparkly! As for readers... yikes! YOU'RE DOING AWESOME!

... and I'm only half psycho, on my mother's side.

:twilightsheepish:

Pfheh.
Sometimes the best parodies are the ones that make nearly zero effort to hide what they're parodying.
Nice work.

It was definitely a fun read, she totally did it on purpose, eheheh.:scootangel:

Cute little story :3

“Awww yeah! Now it’s the time for action!” Being unable to contain my excitement any longer, I pounced on the startled purple unicorn, forcing her on the floor once again.

Twilight twitched a little and let out a surprised gasp when I slowly but confidently plugged my huge throbbing Pony PlayStable controller into the glistering and inviting darkness of the console port. It felt so good, you would never believe!

I choked on my paddlepop, you bastard!:rainbowlaugh:

Sugary soda, in the home of a dentist? Glorious blasphemy! :pinkiecrazy:

1237170
Thank you for your kind words, ElectroNeko! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

1237470
Yes, Sweetie. You see when two ponies love each other very much, they seek solitude together an then they... join the Imperial legion and put an end to the Stormcloak rebellion once and for all! :pinkiecrazy:

1238738
Oh... my. I hope you're okay, Cascadejackal? :fluttershysad: Oh please everypony, don't read my silly fanfic while eating -- it's a choking hazard!

1238851
Wow! If I had seen this picture before, my silly story would have had quite a different ending! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Bonbon_OMG_LOVE.png

Why hello there, sexy Twily~ dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_bedroomeyes.png How about you and me go upstairs and... you know... play a friendly game on my new Pony Haystation? :scootangel:

1238982
Yeah, Colgate party like a rock star -- gallons of sugary fizzy drinks, enormous amounts of greasy food and of course a lot of hot sexy action! :pinkiehappy:

1240793

That is completely your decision, Captain McMuffin, sir. But if you smiled, even barely, while reading this silly story -- then I know I feel that my mission was a success! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Colgate_beam.png

I... but... how does a port glisten? This was a very fun read. Too bad it was just a parody. :twilightsheepish:

1239098 :raritywink: ehehehehe, probably. :rainbowlaugh:

I love this story, but I keep seeing it appearing in my 'Unread Chapters' list. Why is that? :twilightoops:

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media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m93gjhJLdD1qc0elj.gif

Sorry GeodesicDragon, it's only been 4 days since I've created an account here, and I tend to read all the stories offline on my Android phone, so I am afraid I have no idea what's wrong with that "Unread Chapters" list of yours. :rainbowhuh:

1242092

Well it's just a comedy act, don't take it too seriously, TPurnell18! Of course if you like the idea, then by all means -- she's clopping alright! :rainbowlaugh:

1242213

S'aright. Probably just a bug. :derpytongue2:

I DONT KNOW WHAT MY FEELS ARE DOING :raritydespair:

i1120.photobucket.com/albums/l494/Wickedland/WhatAmIReading-1.jpg

-is partially how I feel right now.

Well, that was entertaining, in an odd sort of way. At the same time it was silly and ridiculous, it was also kind of sweet. Here are some nitpicks:

-Earth ponies and unicorns were complaining that the bus trip from Ponyville alone will take about an hour,
The word "bus" kind of jolted me out of the FiM world and into some sort of alternate one whre buses exist. I don't know if that's what you were intending to do, but it just sounded odd to me.

-Sitting on my haunches I scooted closer to Twilight, lying on her back, and eyed her amazing figure.
Just a bit confusing as to who was lying on their back due to the way it was formatted. It would read much easier like this, "Sitting on my haunches, I scooted closer to Twilight and eyed her amazing figure as she lay on her back". Something like that.

-“Sweet Celestia above why are you so sexy, stupid Twilight?!” I heard a mischievous chirrup behind me.
This is a really nitpicky nitpick that would be better suited coming from a pre-reader, but I shall say it anyway; "[...] so stupidly sexy" would have read better then "so sexy, stupid Twilight". As it is now, it sounds odd.

Again, I quite enjoyed this story. It was a lot of sllly stupid sexy fun. :pinkiehappy:

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