• Member Since 24th Aug, 2014
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A web developer whose writing process occasionally looks like Pinkie's infamous Party Of One thanks to characters deciding to derail his fics when they feel they make more sense that way.


Blueblood's date goes from bad to worse when he realizes that his chariot has gone missing. His investigation doesn't take long - but when the meter maid who towed it has a warship, a private army, and absolutely no respect for royals, will he get it back?

Tempest Shadow & Prince Blueblood - not fully romantic, though with potential and some flirting and innuendo. Not related to "Betraying Tempest", though the banter vibes are roughly the same. Also not a "Fast & Furious" parody - the title just clicked.

Written for the May 2021 Pairing Contest

Contains innuendo, ponies mocking royal titles, Blueblood being a bad boss, lots of shouting, yet another made-up country, and mockery of heliocentrism.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 18 )

“Oh! Oh no!” Her smile faltered. “I’m so sorry! I thought you had realized!”

“...realized what?” he asked, his voice already half an octave higher than normal.

She leaned over the table and beckoned him to do the same. “Princess Celestia does not raise the sun,” she whispered, as if afraid that one of the two Royal Guards behind him might pounce her, and gave him a dead-serious look. “The sun does not, in fact, move around the planet.”

It obviously wasn't about heliocentrism...but I have had the misfortune of somehow getting into a conversation that ran a lot like this.

I feel your pain, Blueblood. And it's not everyday where I can legit say that I sympathize with you, so you best cherish it while you can.

"But you’d probably just invent another layer of lies to justify what you see.”

That is how conspiracy theories work--they aren't interested in learning the actual truth, as they've already decided on what they think the "truth" is, they just want to be told they're right.

But as they are quite usually not right...

Unicorn... perfect, white coat... purple mane... I feel that she should be easy to place - this combination is sort of a rarity in this part of town...

Yes, I'd like to buy Blueblood a clue for him please, just so I can put him out of his misery on this already. :rainbowlaugh:

“Well, that explains a lot,” he heard himself say even as he was processing all of this. “I thought she looked like a criminal!”

Wow, Blueblood really doesn't want that chariot back.

She smiled widely, then turned her head left and right as if looking for something. “Grubber?” she asked, then waited for a moment. “GRUBBER!” she suddenly roared, making Blueblood, his guards, and likely every living being in a half-mile radius jump.

Who does she think she is? Dave Seville?

this situation was quite obviously insane, but it sure beat debating with a heliocentrist!

I mean, you gotta give him that. :ajsmug:

He squinted when he realized that somepony had attached red and blue flashing lights as well as some reflective orange tape onto it to make it pass as an official Canterlot meter maid vehicle.

And I'm envisioning both as being comically undersized for it too.

I feel like Blueblood and Tempest were both playing verbal chess here...except on differing game boards and having no idea where the opposing player's pieces are even at. :rainbowlaugh:

Oooh, this was great. I was smiling ear-to-ear the whole way through. xD

this was really good, dont know where the ship of theses two came from but m glad there another great story to add to it roster

I like this ship. What's it called? Bluepest? Blueberry? :pinkiegasp:

Definitely gonna check out your other story. :pinkiehappy:

This, this is gold!

This...this I like.

This is most excellent. Well done! :rainbowlaugh:

Blueblood burnt through a considerable amount of willpower to not grin - the thought of ticketing an invading fleet for parking violations was creative even by his aunt’s high standards.

That is clever, you have to admit it

🎵Lovely Tempest, meter maid🎶

I like BloodBerry because it sounds like an item in a fantasy RPG

Tempest and Blueblood. Not my first choice of pairings, but it sure is fun!

Humorous and cute. A rarepair done well.

Why is it that, when it comes to Blueblood, the only ships I really enjoy reading about him in are the crack ships? Maybe it's because they tend to be the ones where he can believably and entertainingly be in a relationship while remaining his kinda-to-completely awful self, and receive a good balance of romantic fulfillment and abject suffering...

Actually, forget I asked, that's exactly the reason.

this combination is sort of a rarity in this part of town...


Hah! Okay, that was a lot of fun. Blueblood feeling appropriately Blueblood, while being at least a little likeable. Wishing him all the best in the negotiations to come.

The only issue with this story is that it ended already - a distinct lack of decent Blueblood stories lately: need more.

Odd paring but hilarious and she definitely would yeet him overboard but with a way to not die first

So the chemistry you bring about between these two seems to be their rather... rough attitudes, to say the least? I can get behind banter-based shipping! Thanks for the story and the unorthodox pair!

Second I've seen to try to pull off this pairing. Ambitious just to try but also a fun read

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