We all know the royal family...
Or do we?
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Twilight Sparkle is the faithful student of Princess Celestia. Celestia has a sister, Princess Luna, and a niece, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. Cadenza is also called Cadence and is Twilight Sparkle's old foalsitter. Who is Cadence's mother, though? Not Luna, and certainly not Celestia. Who is it?
Enjoy this story, in which you and Twilight will find out more from Celestia, about a new sister added to the family, who is also named Twilight. While going on quite an interesting adventure, along the way.
Chapters (4)
H-How was this conclusion even drawn? How? Really, I want to know just... Really?
Review time!
1) Your description looks good once you click on the story, but unfortunately it's a mess when seen on the front page. Since the description is the first impression people will get, it's vital that it look good on the front page. I know tons of people who will judge an entire story based on what they see in the description, both content-wise and grammar-wise, and as unfair as that seems, it works most of the time.
2) The beginning went by way too fast. Slow down and take your time. Describe the scenes and the characters. Let us know what the characters are thinking and feeling so the audience can establish a connection with them. Right now, the whole Angel subplot is taking over the story for precisely that reason.
3) Luna's bad grammar didn't really work for me. I know it was supposed to be funny, but it just came off as silly to me. Then again, it's like 2:30 in the morning right now, so I should probably go get some sleep instead of critiquing stories.
Anywho, I hope this helps! Good luck!
1229023 I've stopped asking that question. And you should too. It saves braincells.
will read when i get home...looks like it could be gooddl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/lolface_Celestia.png dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Twilight_Sparkle_lolface.png
Thanks, ScribbleStick. I'll do some editing, and try to make sure it makes more sense, and try to describe everything more. This is my first story and I really appreciate the feedback.
To: Overlord-Flinx: I'll try to make more sense of it all, in the next chapter.
Sorry that it's one giant mess right now. I'll try to clean it up. Thanks for your advice!
Maybe I won't edit the prolouge, after all. Anyway, I'm putting up chapter 1, soon. I hope it's better than this one, because I tried to be more discriptive and make more sense. I appreciate the feedback, and again, I apologise for prolouge and opening being two giant messes. Thanks for the advice. I'm sorry for confusion, but this is my first story, and I haven't read a lot of others. I've favorited a lot, but I haven't read most of them, actually. I'm really sorry, I'm trying my best. I think the next chapter is far better, but that's just my opinion. Next chapter will be up, soon!
I hope this is better than the prolouge! Feedback is appreciated! Thanks!
not as bad as i thought it would be! maybe write some more? X3 i hate cliffhangers.
1244370 You really like it?
Yay! 
Next chapter will be up, soon! 
I used the Barbie song as Cadance's song.
Interesting so far, though I have no idea where you're goin with this. I think that's a good thing though.
1264724 Thank you!
im liking the way this is going, looking forward to the next chapter!
1324743 I forgot to put up the next chapter before a left on a trip. I'm back now, but I still only have a rough draft of the next chapter. There's still a lot of editing to do, but hopefully I'll get the next chapter up today. Thank you!
1331819 sweet im looking forward to it
I edited the song... here's the rest.
I'll point out some errors I found in Chapter 2 and Chapter 3.
Chapter 2:
You really should use some method to distingush her thoughts. Most people use either italics, 'single quotes', or both.
"Now" should be "no" and "loose" should be "lose". That second one is one of the most annoying grammar errors a writer can make. Also, there should be no comma between "but" and "Luna".
You should write out numbers in words, unless they're really big ones. There should be a comma after "thank you". You also misspelled "what", though that seems to be a typo. On the positive side, you remembered to distinguish her thoughts via italics this time.
Chapter 3:
There shouldn't be a comma between "far" and "yet". Also, since they are using the words as names, "mom and dad" should be capitalized: "Mom and Dad".
It's "eavesdropping".
1486998 Thank you, but I'm not sure I'm going to finish this story. I'm focusing on my newer one. Still, thanks!
*Grabs a shot gun and loads it*
1735523 Wha?
Interesting. I've put this on my alert list.
why stop
No. Continue. Now.
i really Love this story is there going to be another chapter???
Are you dead? If your not can you update pleas? I really want to know what happens next.
i know i commented on this chapter before and i am sorry to bug you i was just wondering if by any chance you know when you might post next chapter
i understand that life can get in the way and i don't want to rash you or anything i just asking if you don't know that is okay and take your time on making a grate chapter
just read this story and now
i want more chapters...... good story
oh no! everypony run! if i learned anything from MLP it would be don't let Twilight fix things
Okay, before i read this, I need to know. It our Twilight the reincarnation of the celestial (I refuse to say there officially species name) Twilight?