Write with intent behind every word. Say hi to Tonkus for me. :)
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Dear Princess Celestia,
The land is at peace once and for all. Twilight Sparkle is ready to take on her new duties, and the known foes we once faced have finally been vanquished. We expect little in the way of new trouble to arise from this day onward.
Across Equestria,
Raven Inkwell.
Chapter groups:
Group 1: Introduction
Group 2: Raven of the Shadows
- Group 3: Beginnings(?)
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Not my favourite 'Raven serves the sisters through the ages' story, but still good.
10819533
There is another?
"CUZ YOU ABOUT TA GO BANANAS, ON THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!! *giant spring in the floor launches Raven half way across Equestria* BEEEE-YATCH!!!"
Luna stares, "Is this a bad time to ask when I can control the Moon again?"
It's still a little funny.
Ayyyy I remember you. congrats on the feature!
10819603
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/314663/raven
10820132
Interesting. I was unaware of there being another story with a similar premise to this one.
Out of one, many. Out of many, one.
"So... What do you plan on doing in this last life Raven?" asked Princess Celestia while taking a sip from her glass.
"Oh... I don't know..." pondered Raven "Maybe I will give dating a try. I am still a virgin you see~♡" answered Raven, blushing in embarrassment.
Princess Celestia shocked on her banana daiquiri at that revelation.
*cough* *cough* *cough*
------
"We are Raven!"
"We exist to protect Equestria!"
"That's not creepy..." said Spike, as he hides behind Twilight.
-------
Raven: My cousins are all royal aides, all of us look identical, plus we're all called Raven.
>And that concludes the joking part of the comment<
I loved it! I felt like there could have been one more chapter for Alicorn Raven... but regardless, I loved your story!
10820201
Thank you. It is my attempt to adapt the style of writing utilized within my previous works to a third-person perspective.
I will consider an additional chapter seeing to the fate of the Alicorn Raven.
10820206
I am more curious of what Alicorn Raven was doing before she got disappeared...
I liked this writing style
The only bits that felt a bit "off" were Starswirl explaining to Raven the First what her role would be and Raven the Last explaining everything to Princess Celestia in the end. But writing exposition is really really hard, so it doesn't bother me.
10819603
SCP Pinkamena correctly identified the story I was thinking of.
10820132
Thank You
10820357
Thanks
Good premise, but very cursory execution. This concept could've gone on for ten times as long and been a satisfying thriller, uncovering the mystery on multiple levels throughout. Here, we get a neat idea, but barely any time to appreciate it. When you have to explain the climax after the fact, something's gone wrong. And Raven's speech patterns being that refined in antiquity makes little to no sense. Characters just commenting on an oddity doesn't explain it; it only draws more attention to it.
Still, again, the concept is sound and I enjoyed what's there. Thank you for it.
This... was VERY fun, to me. It would also explain a lot...
That said, I'm with several other commenters, this warrants expanded work. There's too much here to NOT do more with the concept.
10820796
10820466
If I am to expand on the lore of this story, would there be any specific aspect that you would like to see a focus on? Additionally, should I post those hypothetical chapters in this story, or would you rather they be separated into a different, sequel work?
10820992
Hm?
10821015
Just a reaction
10820806
This was some excellent stuff, and I'm looking forard to reading more about the Raven of Shadows!
If I were to suggest how to expand the concept and story, then I would simply greatly expand what's already here. Like another commenter mentioned, this could be ten times the length, which sounds about perfect for what this one covers. It could probably serve pretty well as a separate story, since I feel the way this one is laid out is done really well; it feels like it's meant to be super concise as it presents us with the concept, it doesn't feel like it's meant to be more detailed than it is, but there's definitely lots of potential to do so as a seperate story.
It would somehow seem appropriate to me if the 'Emptiness' were called 'The Filing Cabinet' given who she/they are.
10821214
Thank you.
As of now, I currently plan to continue posting under this story so that people are aware of the updates. The chapters will be sectioned off into "groups" using a table of contents in the description.
So this was Starsquirrel's idea.
Ba nan ba
Man I love Raven
Short... and horrific. Still in character of who Starswirl is. Which is not a good thing. I think I would simply wish to die if I had been enslaved for so long. I would never want to hear of the sisters again let alone see them; god help Starswirl if I could get my hooves on him.
Well, there was a promise, a gift, and a sacrifice, and finally a reward. All given willingly.
Hm. Interesting. Given that Author's Note, if the story (or this chapter 'group') goes in the kind of direction it could... you may want to add the [dark] tag. But only if you end up writing along that kind of line. I wouldn't just add it now while there's no truly dark material at the moment.
I suspected it was Alicorn Raven trying to kill Twilight... Now I know.
Hm. Yeah, you might wanna up that rating, just to be safe. Never hurts going from E to T. T to M is another thing, but I think you'll be fine.
10828456
I suppose so. I will do that then. Thank you for the feedback.
What's in the hole, Eh?
10821495
This made me chuckle.
10819637
"The Collector"...
And three Raven's on his basement...
Is it me!? Am I..."Eh"!?
Cuatro Raven: Yes. I mean... No.
HahahaxD
10840717
The tensions have escalated!
Tada :V
almost forgot to post this here oof
10843712
Thank you for the reading. I have corrected the typos that you have pointed out.
The plot thickens...
"Eddie Brock, We are Raven!"
But Hasbro only made two official Raven dolls! Where are we gonna get the other eighteen...
10871224
fanmade plushies? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
10874057
Only TWO are known to exit!
https://www.deviantart.com/serenity-sama/art/Plushie-Raven-Inkwell-MLP-FiM-763871563
https://www.deviantart.com/cinnamon-stitch/art/mlp-plushie-commission-RAVEN-INKWELL-769575866
And, of course, one is mine
I guess we could also count in these three here:
https://derpibooru.org/images/307573
https://derpibooru.org/images/751259
https://derpibooru.org/images/714495
But we still would need 13 more...
10874207
Rip
She's really selling the deception well.
10880757
Thank you for the compliment.
Are you sure that Raven is not a Deception with a pony alternate form!?
Raven: Well, if telling the truth is deception... Then I'm gladly guilty.
The line about she got killled by testing out some magical construct was prizeless
10883316
A Deception? Do you mean a Decepticon like the ones from the Transformers series?
10884555
Yep!
I'm still holding hope for Hasbro to give us Beast Wars style My Little Pony: Transformers toys
(I would buy them!)