Who Needs Enemies -- Part II

by Lets Do This

So... We're NOT Your Friends?

The next morning Twilight awoke, feeling somewhat better. She trotted downstairs, following the welcome aroma of pancakes. And found Spike busying himself in the Library's small kitchen, wearing his chef's hat and the apron with the heart on the pocket.

"Morning, Spike!" Twilight called.

"Hey, Twi!" he answered, flipping cakes on the griddle. "I had a hunch your favorite breakfast would get you down here in hurry."

"Thanks, that was thoughtful of you. Are the others here yet?"

"Huh? Are we having company for breakfast?" Spike shrugged. "No worries. I can always make more pancakes."

"Uh... don't the six of us always have breakfast together?" Twilight asked. "Before we... oh, wait. I guess we don't work on magic lessons together."

"Nope! You're pretty much it, as far as magic goes," Spike said. "Except, maybe for Rarity..." He paused, staring into space rapturedly. "Wowza!"

"Focus, Casanova." Twilight pointed at one of the pancakes, which was getting a little overdone. Then she blinked, realizing she'd taken Spike's hopeless infatuation with the fashionista completely for granted, like it was perfectly normal.

Which it was... now.

"So, where is everypony?" she said, to cover her uncertainty. "Maybe I'll wander round and visit them for a change."

"Well, let's see..." Spike said. "Applejack's probably already bucking trees in the orchards. Rarity said she'd be doing fittings around town today. Fluttershy will be checking up on the local animals and birds. Pinkie Pie? Who knows where the hay she is. And Rainbow Dash... she'll probably be hard at work..."

"...napping," Twilight chorused with him. "Okay, scratch that. I'll just have breakfast, and then, oh I don't know... wander around town. See if I run into them." She shrugged, resignedly. "It's pretty nice, living in Ponyville. No pressure, a tree full of books to organize, my Number One Assistant on hoof if I need anything." She exchanged a grin with the dragon. "It's a nice quiet life all round, Spike..."

Then she sighed. Her face fell.

"You okay, Twi?" Spike asked. "You've been kinda out of it ever since Discord showed up."

"It's... a long story, Spike," Twilight said. "I've had some things to sort out in my head. I should be all right in a bit."

"Well, go on out to the desk. I'll bring you a short stack to get you started. You want hash browns?"

"No thanks. Just griddle-cakes, with plenty of syrup."

"You got it, Twi!"

Twilight went out and sat down at the desk in the main room -- her desk, her librarian's desk. She looked around at her snug, cozy little library. At least there were some changes in her life that weren't all that hard to get used to.

She looked at her desk. Amongst the books and scrolls, there were three quills lying side-by-side, one of which was out of alignment. Almost absentmindedly, she nudged it back into place with a hoof.

Her gaze fell on the portal, still hovering in midair in the middle of the room.

Have to ask Discord to close that, she thought, so nopony wanders through it by accident. There's been more than enough of that craziness around here lately...

And then she blinked, realizing. She'd decided: this was the way things ought to be. She'd made her peace with it. So, she should just accept it and move on.

No sense putting it off. Clearing her throat, she raised her voice, assuming the draconequus could probably hear her from whatever weird dimension he disappeared off to. "Dis--"

SLAM! The library's front door was suddenly thrown open...

... by Cheese Sandwich. The party pony's curly hair was practically fizzing with excitement.

"Twilight! The places I've been! The things I've seen!" The curly-haired, yellow-shirted pony shouted. "You just have no idea! I went all round the world to find myself... and there I was, all along!"

Whipping out his accordion, he began singing:

A Super-Duper Party Pony,
That pony is me!
I've always known that was the kind of
Pony I should be!

For when I was a little colt,
I just wanted to clown.
But everypony told me,
Cheese, shut up and sit back down!

But when I threw a party
And I busted out some moves,
The ponies finally saw the light,
And got into the groove!

A Super-Duper Party Pony,
That pony is me!
You'll never meet another party-ponyyyy
Quite like Cheese!

"And Pinkie!" yelled Pinkie Pie, turning a cartwheel through the doorway right after him. Then she ran over to the desk to stare wild-eyed at Twilight.

"Twi! You'll never guess who I ran into -- literally! We were running opposite ways down Trotter Avenue, and BOOM!" Tossing her forehooves in the air, Pinkie fell backward, laughing hysterically.

"Hey, Twilight! Sorry I'm a little late," Cheese said. "The 'ol cheesy-sense was a-tingling, telling me there was a pony here who needed a party. And I knew I'd need help, so I roped in Pinkie." He grinned at her. "Reaaaady, pardner?"

She bounced up onto her hooves. "You know it, Cheese!"

Before Twilight could say anything, Pinkie had hauled in her party-cannon and, with a single confetti-blizzard blast, decorated the entire room in streamers and balloons. Cheese Sandwich was already dancing around the room, playing a fast-paced jig that made it difficult to hear or think coherently.

Hearing the noise, Spike trotted out from the kitchen carrying a dripping spatula.

"What the hay?"

"Spike!" Pinkie shouted. "Go get Rarity and Rainbow! We need the whole gang for this -- stat!"

"But... the pancakes..."

"Go on! I got this!" Pinkie shouted. Her mane wrapped around the spatula, jerking it out of his claw as she raced past him and vanished into the kitchen.

"Well... okay!" Spike yanked off apron and hat and hurried out through the still-open front door.

"Uhhh... somepony wanna tell me what all the noise is about?" Rainbow Dash leaned in through an upper window. "I was takin' a snooze up on the balcony here. Ya know, just in case Twi needed anything. Did I miss a birthday invite or something?"

"Rainbow!" Cheese shouted. "Just the pony we need! Fastest pony in Equestria! Go get Applejack and Fluttershy! We need 'em here, pronto!"

"Wha? Okay, I'm on it!" Rainbow flung herself away, vanishing upwards in a flash of rainbow contrail.

"Cheese?" Twilight asked. "What are you doing here? I thought we left you working at that sandwich shop?"

"You did."

"Well, how did you get here?"

"I walked."

Twilight stared. "From Manehattan?"

"No, silly!" Cheese laughed. "Through the portal. I actually got back earlier this morning. I was a little turned around at first, because this end had moved. But after wandering around a while I recognized Ponyville from the time I visited here before. And then I ran to find Pinkie Pie. And here we all are!"

"But... what about the sandwich shop? I thought you loved working there."

"I did, at first." Cheese shrugged. "But after a while, it dawned on me: I wasn't really making ponies happy. Not for keeps. I was just a distraction in the middle of their workday. They'd smile, wolf down their lunch, and then go right back to the grind, no happier than before. It wasn't enough, Twilight. It didn't stick! They needed something more, something big, something lasting. They needed --"

"A par-tyyyyy!" Pinkie chorused with him, leaning out from the kitchen. She was already half-covered in flour and blending something furiously in a mixing bowl.

"And that made me realize," Cheese went on, "that I wasn't really happy there at all. I need to put joy in ponies' hearts, Twilight! Lift their spirits! I'm a PARTY pony! And that's never gonna change! Wahoo!" He danced around again, playing a fierce rhumba that had his accordion wheezing and squealing perilously.

"You weren't really happy..." Twilight repeated, just to be sure she'd heard it right. "But I just assumed you were..."

She gasped. Her eyes went wide, her blood ran cold. Suddenly, the wall of self-control she'd carefully built up, piece by piece, brick by brick, out of a sense of responsibility and duty to her friends...

... shattered like glass, leaving her feeling terrified and panicky.

"Omigosh... I just assumed it was true for all of them! I didn't really check! Maybe the others weren't happy either!"

"Maybe..." Cheese allowed, as he swung by her desk. "Or maybe I was the only one?"

"I don't think you were, Cheese," Twilight said, desperately. "And that means... Cheese! We have to go find them! We have to get them all back!"

"Get who back?" Applejack trotted in through the door. "What's all the commotion 'bout? I was pulling a load of apples to market and Rainbow come blastin' by, told me to high-tail it on over here. Then she shot off towards Fluttershy's. What's goin' on, Twilight?"

Twilight gritted her teeth.

"I'll explain everything, A.J. But... let's wait until everypony's here, all right?"

"Okay..." Applejack glanced around at the decorations. "Huh. Somepony havin' a birthday I didn't know 'bout?"

------------------------------

"But Twilight, dearest!" Rarity said. "You're saying none of us are the ponies we started with? Discord replaced all of us? I mean, all of them? These other ponies you mentioned?"

"I'm afraid so." Twilight nodded.

"And that means," Pinkie asked, tears in her eyes, "we're not really your friends?"

"Pinkie!" Twilight said, quickly hugging her. "Of course you're my friends. All of you are! We're just not the bearers of the Elements. I mean, we are now. But that's not how things were, when this all started."

Rainbow scratched her mane in confusion. "So... we're livin' a lie here? Is that what you're telling us?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying. Only that this wasn't the way things were when we started."

"Oh! Why didn't you say something, Twilight?" asked Fluttershy.

"Because..." Twilight grimaced. "Well, if everypony seemed happy with how things turned out, what good would it do to know?"

"I do take your point, Twi." Applejack nodded. "It is a bit of a shocker, now you tell us. But now you're sayin' that everypony wasn't really happy?"

"Cheese Sandwich here," Twilight said, gesturing to him, "he somehow found his way back. And his new life wasn't what he or I thought it would be. The same may be true for the others. I have to find them, A.J.! I have to bring them back... and that means..."

She winced.

"Look, I want you all to know, you're some of the best friends a pony could have. With everything we've been through -- finding the Elements, defeating Nightmare Moon, all of it -- I wouldn't trade any of you for the world! But these other ponies... well, we discovered the Field of Harmony together, we rescued Princess Luna together, we've studied and worked together, and they're just... well..."

She hung her head, ashamed. And then felt a hoof settling around her shoulders.

"Say it, Twi," Applejack encouraged her. "It's the truth. It may hurt some, but in the end, it always helps to say it. They're your friends, right?"

"They're my friends, Applejack!" Twilight agreed desperately. "They're the friends I grew up with. I need to get them back! I didn't say anything because I thought I was doing the right thing. But I've made a huge mistake, and now I need to fix it. Assuming I still can..."

"Of course ya do!" Applejack nodded. "And you'll have all of us helpin' ya. Right, gang?"

The others nodded. "Mm-hmm... Absolutely!... Yes, indeedy!... Heck, yeah!"

"But, Applejack..."

"Twi, you said it yourself: we're your friends too! We don't need the Elements or whatnot to know that. We'll always have that connection, no matter what. But from what you're sayin', this is important. And you've never steered us wrong yet. If you say these other ponies are the ones who should have this Field thing in place of us and the Elements, well... then that's the way it ought to be! And we'll help you set it right."

"You said it!" Rainbow added. "Just tell us what we gotta do!"

"Thank you, everypony," Twilight said, smiling. "You don't know how much this means. Well, the first thing we need to do is figure out how to find them all again."

"Um, why not ask Discord?" Fluttershy said. "I'm sure he'd be able to find them."

"No offense, Fluttershy?" Twilight said carefully. "I'm not sure we should rely on Discord. He might decide to do something that makes things even worse. Like making the portal go away altogether."

"Yeah." Pinkie Pie nodded. "From what Celestia told us about him, that is kinda his M.O.!"

"Okay..." Fluttershy nodded sadly. "I guess you're right."

"Speakin' of the draconequus," Applejack said, "where's he at, anyways?"

"I'm not sure," Fluttershy said. "We had a cup of tea, and chatted for a bit yesterday. And then he mentioned something about needing to go put his own home dimension back in disorder." She giggled. "I was sorry to see him go. We'd had such a fun time! He made the teapot dance, and conjured up ginsing that really sings, and there was this piñata that sneezed... I still don't know why, but it made me laugh. And..."

She looked around, blushing.

"Well... I was sorry he had to leave, that's all."

"Don't get too attached, dearest," Rarity warned. "We might end up having to put him back in the Sculpture Garden after all."

Fluttershy winced. "Is that really necessary?"

"It might be." Twilight nodded. "Though it's a last resort, I agree."

"And if he does show up," Applejack added thoughtfully, "might be best, Fluttershy, if you kept him lookin' the other way for a bit. Seein' as how he's taken such a shine to ya."

"Oh! That doesn't sound very honest..."

"Not askin' ya to lie, hon," Applejack said. "Not at all. Just... keep him out of the lariat, like. So he don't catch wind o' what we're up to."

"I see." Fluttershy nodded. "Okay, I'll try."

"Well, that's Discord taken care of." Rainbow swooped over to the portal, examining it from both sides. "So now we need to make this puppy work, all by ourselves. Annnnd... somepony wanna tell me how we do that?"

"Sunset might know," Twilight said, thinking out loud. "Or Starlight. Or even Trixie, maybe. But they're over on the other side. And we don't know how to get to them, and..." She suddenly looked puzzled. "Wait a second... Cheese! How did you get back through the portal? How did you even remember it was there?"

He thought about it for a moment. "You know, Twilight, I have no idea. But hey, I'm a party pony!" He shrugged. "No one told me I couldn't do it, so I did!"

Pinkie Pie nodded. "Yep! He's a party pony, all right!"

"I followed my cheesy-sense, just like I always do," Cheese went on, "and it led me straight back here."

"Do you think, maybe..." Twilight asked cautiously, "... you might use it to find the others?"

Cheese shrugged. "Never hurts to try, right? So who should we look for first?"

Comments

[Eroraf86]

"No one told me I couldn't do it, so I did!"

This may just be the single best explanation of party ponies I have ever seen. It's honestly a bit scary, but it's also FUN!

[Lets Do This]

Thanks, Eroraf -- I've kind of assumed from the get-go that Pinkie, and party-ponies in general, are the Roger Rabbits of the pony world. They can pretty much do anything as long as it's funny, or in service of cheering somepony up. Cheese in particular seems to have a much longer-range "party radar" than Pinkie, and can detect that a pony needs cheering up even from a divergent virtual pseudo-space...

[Dan]

10795514
There are many Party Ponies throughout Equestria. The have their own super-duper-secret society and regularly get together for (family-friendly) Eyes Wide Shut secret society meetings-that-are-also-big-(SFW)-parties.

Even SMILE doesn't know about them or their strange Party Pony magics. And it's a good thing evil-Starlight never found out about Party Favor. I guess Party Pony magic includes passive geasa so the Party Pony is able to resist mind control and cutie mark theft and prevented from being somehow compelled to divulge it.

[DanaO]

Typically, the ideal goal of any scientific experiment is to find out how you were wrong. (The okay-but-less-than-ideal goal being to just find out that you were wrong, with having been right from the start that consolation trophy that smells suspiciously like it was lying around when somepony discovered an desperate and urgent need for cheese dip.)

[redmar]

THey real catch with Discord's plan was that the decision was made too soon. I wonder what Fluttershy has to say to him when everything is revealed.