Chaodiurn
Joined 7th Jun, 2012 ·
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A dark story but one that is entirely possible and not an unreasonable interpretation of the nature of the elements and the possible consequences of misusing them. And, yes, I think that the Princesses (Celestia too) are quite capable of being viciously cold and dispassionately cruel should the need exist.
Don't be so quick to absove Twilight in your minds. She very nearly brought utter disaster on Equestria by what sounded like a combination of naievette and arrogance. Perhaps the punishment is harsh beyond words but think of what would have befallen countless innocents if, in her misguided folly, she had broken the seal!
possibly continue or a sequel please since i wish to know how celestia would erase her pain since i doubt she meant killing twilight since she seems really against twilight being tortured or killed for this
1217897
Yay, the first comment in my first published story! (And sadly, a really messy one [yet])
I'm so,so glad that you think it's believable. Having this in mind, I'm sure that it will become a bit easier now to get rid of over-thinking issues in my other stories.
1217985
Weeell.. there is a rather big playground for more chapters and/or a sequel, so it's technically absolutely possible. However, this was some kind of a one-night-stand. You know, no questions, a bunch of fun, and then back to business. But meh. I know my mind better. The urge to write sad/dark will come again sooner or later, and with this story I have something to do against it now.
In a short and pregnant sentence, that simply means that there will be most likely more stuff around that happening. Maybe another chapter of the story itself, maybe another fic for Lunas fights in her foalhood. I don't know. What I can say, is that this is on the bottom of my 'to-write-list'.
And yes, I promise that the quality will raise. (Not hard at all..)
1217897
I would agree with that kind of thinking if the royal sisters were shown as ruthless monarchs (diarchs actually) who care for nothing else but their own good and upholding "tradition", as long as it favors them of course. But even they could show leniency to their most fateful servants who did a mistake and had to pay for it. Laws are a tool but the one wielding them has to use it how he thinks proper.
Besides that times change and some traditions and old laws become unneeded and cruel for the sake of cruelty.
And on top of everything else Luna did try the same so why was she not punished in the same way. What i saw is Luna just torturing Twilight for her own amusement and because she tried to do what Luna tried but was not allowed.
Would be nice to see this continued though, an epilogue or something.
9 Dislikes 1 likes? Ok make that 2 now
That really unfair towards the author and fic, my guess is because he dared to make Luna anything other then a good character that Luna fanboys worship her as.
I dislike both Luna for all the malice she shown towards Twilight and Celestia for her cowardice, but that doesnt make the fic a bad one.
(also in the description its "she failed and made thinks even worse. " thinks should be things)
1222964
Thinks should be things? Seriously? I did that? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_cry.png
Also, I wouldn't say the voting is that bad because I made Luna be a bad (okay, very bad) pony and stuff. (Ha, Luna is second-best pony to me!)
I think it's more likely because, well, it's rather bad. But I proofread it today. Hopefully, it makes the story slightly better. It still won't be made for anything around a 50:50 voting, but meh. Who cares. It was fun to write.
1224445
It being fun to write should be the point, I read bad things and this isn't one of them. It's not the best either, but hey if it's your first then you can only improve.
1224659
I never said it's my first! It's my first one-shot and my first published, but not my first overall. I have several stories running by now, two of them above 10k/chapter, each one planned, re-planned, un-planned and whatnot. That's why I'm so annoyed about myself, releasing this without even proofreading it.
1224703
Its the published that count!
Who better to help you improve then people who wont sugarcoat it.
Proofreading can be done later, improving in persistent errors is more important!
Ye-heay! Final edits are done and so this is from now on the final version of 'Of Law and Friendship' chapter X - 'Circumstances'.
Hopefully, this is a bit (more) enjoyable now.
I've taken a look at this, and while it could still use some editing in parts, it's easier to understand than a lot of others, and the concept, while quite dark, is done well, and it's justified reasonably. Not too bad, not great, could use work, but not bad at all.
I'll give you the third like for the story. Good luck with your future writing.
1290763
A like! I like likes. It's like somepony liked what I have done, what is most likely really motivating!
Seriously, glad you enjoyed it.
And thanks for the nice wishes for my future writing. We will see what it will bring along very soon.
Nice Interval.
The problem is the question if it is after,before or during the snippet you presented that is the middle or end of your story.
Can be a general problem with writing parts of the story randomly i guess?
1399527
Never fear, I have a plan for that. I may write the parts randomly, but when uploading them I make sure that they are in the right order. Either I will delete everything to get the first chapter first, or at least write [part x] into the chapter-names, when an earlier happening occurs.
Means that this happened in the night after the banishment.
Anyways.. I'm glad you liked it. I wasn't sure if it's understandable for people who aren't me. The next chapter will be a little better in this matter.
1400697
Who says it has to be understandable?
Half the time I was tempted to just skip like 80% of it, for being random mumbo jumbo talk you would think of when making a dream (what it was in the end huh xD ).
Loved the end of it though, the nightmare talking probably has some significance or will have.
Over 24k words... couldnt you have split it into two parts or something?
Ill read it when i feel ready for it.
2532808
I would have... if I actually had planned it to become that long.
And I finally know where your avatar is from! It's the hotel, isn't it?
2532818
Okay.
And Yep!
Bitchy princesses? Instant upvote.
Saw this and figured would be not worth my time, but I took a gander and Wow, you should defintely continue this.
But considering you haven't been active for over 2 years, its highly inprobable.