- Member Since 2nd Nov, 2012
- offline last seen 35 minutes ago
Admiral Biscuit
Virtually invisible to PaulAsaran
Admiral Biscuit
Joined 2nd Nov, 2012 ·
Offline
Sequels1
-
Admiral Biscuit · 8.5k words · 31 2 · 303 views
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Admiral Biscuit · 8.5k words · 31 2 · 303 views
- Admiral Biscuit · 4.3k words · 147 6 · 1.2k views
- Antiquarian · 15k words · 46 1 · 626 views
- Admiral Biscuit · 1.9k words · 79 3 · 1.3k views
- Gentian · 3.4k words · 28 3 · 798 views
- Comma Typer · 24k words · 83 1 · 1.8k views
- Admiral Biscuit · 5.7k words · 66 1 · 551 views
- Admiral Biscuit · 1k words · 88 2 · 1.5k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.13 seconds
Total duration
1,133 users online
1,731,899 hits today, 1,822,946 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
My lack of preparation is the reason this is dropping over the course of days in unfortunate updates; the good news is it gives all y’all a chance to re-think your life choices or at least your fic preferences.
It won’t get better, flee while you still can.
Yes, that is a thing. It's the indication that he's a male, even if it is on his rump.
Poor Kitkat she just can’t seem to catch a break. I hope she has a plan on obscuring his/her cutie mark, that could be considered obscene.
Muffins not in a plastic wrapper? That there is fancy stuff.
10749002
He has a robe.
KitKat, you're a vindictive little mare, I still love you.
10748998
But is it? Maybe he’s good at other dick-related things even if he doesn’t have one.
F
ing cutie marks, how do they work?
derpicdn.net/img/view/2014/1/25/533298.jpeg
10749002
She kinda caught a break, at least he’s a mare for now.
And don’t worry, she’s got a plan to cover his cutie marks.
10749282
I know, right? Cheap hotels give you muffins in wrappers, mid-grade hotels at least unwrap the muffins for you, and the best ones have a proper buffet (that you pay extra for [but it’s tasty, so it’s okay]).
10749570
Yes, but it’s less practical for a pony than you’d think. Unless KitKat wants to get out the scissors and practice arts and crafts on his robe, that is.
10750248
KitKat’s put up with a lot of his shit and she hasn’t murdered him yet despite both the opportunity and the temptation. She’s a real trooper, and I mean that in the best way. She’s a pony I’d like to have at my side, even if she does occasionally fuck with me.
10750444
Of course she did, just for the lulz.
Or maybe it is. Maybe the real magic was under his tail all along.
. . . actually, now that I think about it, the real magic is that contextually, both your comment and the reply make sense despite there normally being about a billion layers of ‘that’s not how any of this works’ stacked on all of it.
10750569
🦄🌈💩!
One must always be wary of the Feral Roombas. They cannot be directed, and become hostile in the presence of The Dirty. It's much worse with the more evolved formes, which are quieter and more difficult to spot...
Feral Roombas
Feral Roombas? pshaw. Nothing like a pack of feral spots to get a pony moving - https://youtu.be/6Zbhvaac68Y?t=2
Not sure why, but I keep reading the chapter title in the cadance of "What'z Ya Phone #"
How do Roombas go feral?
Yes it is, it always is.
10750573
And they fart sparkles, that’s canon.
10750628
You’ve hit the nail exactly on the head.
The good news is that even the more evolved ones tend to navigate by bumping off things, which gives a good adventurer a clue at what foe she’s facing.
I’ve heard legends of Roombas with knives. Hopefully just legend, but one never knows.
10750843
It could be worse.
i.redd.it/q5bwrr6q1lf21.jpg
10750901
To quote Citation Needed, nope, that’s not horrifying, that’s not horrifying at all.
10750925
BEechwood 4-5789 . . . my own internal response to a phone number query. Props if you understand that phone number (because it is a phone number).
10751122
Abandoned by their owners for whatever reason, they herd up and no longer keep themselves to domestic tasks . . . it’s a wide, wide world, and the world is dirty and needs cleaning. Leave them alone and they’re benign, but put dirt on their cleaned paths and they seek revenge, hunting down and vacuuming the offending party.
10752058
Ah, that’s how.
She will never be rid of him will she? She may fantasize about killing him but since she is a pony she will not.
10752039
It isn’t, it specifically says it isn’t, and you can’t put it on the internet if it’s not true. :P
10752061
I mean, she could. Just slit him from guggle to zatch, that should do it. Probably if she hadn’t signed the contract in the very beginning she would have already and if anypony asked, well it’s obvious that he clearly suffered death by misadventure and there’s no need for any further investigation, right?
She’s maybe not the smartest pony out there, but she does respect her obligations, and she promised to help the Wizard find the McGuffin and will do so to the best of her abilities.
10752060
It’s the circle of life, baby.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/3/21/275916.png
Er, uh, excuse me, I need to get off this ride
Attempts to get up and finds out that Dear Reader has somehow been tied to his chair sometime during the last chapter
Hey, uhm, has anyone else noticed that they've been tied up? I'm sure it's just a mistake. Anyways, no matter, it's alright, I have a knife
Attempts to cut through the ropes, only to find that they're steel cored
Okay, now this is getting a little scary. Nevermind, I can just --
Finds out that the knife along with everything in his pockets has disappeared
Nevermind, it's fine, I'm sure I can survive another chapter or three of this
Hears the Power Up sound of a ROOMBA
Sheer Terror Mode enabled
10752050
Did you know there have been people that attached claymore mines to roombas Biscuit?
Also you play Magic? And the fact you named Koko makes it likely a lie, and lastly, Mongolian horse friction, I remember that story.
So long as that peach stays that way, we'll all be okay...
Fun fact: feral Roombas are actually intoxicated by unicorn farts, and a sister species of vacuums are especially attracted to them. Stay diligent!
The Wizard isn't fully embracing his pony-ness. Not sure if a good thing...
I hope nobody tells KitKat about Owlbears or or the Bugbear from the episode Slice of Life.
Skunks are already weaponized for their personal protection, but Kukka's shown how deadly they can be for everyone else when yeeted by the right mare. Clearly the two McGuffin hunters could use a tactical Bag of Skunk Holding to defend themselves with in the future. Offensively.
I still love how you made Dutch your pony language of choice.
Something tells me said cave may be currently occupied, said occupant happy with the current situation and not big into things like 'change' and 'new cavemates'.
*
—From the analysis section of the above-linked NTSB report
10752293
The ride never ends
Good news, I did drop the long lewd Evergivenchan chapter for a shorter, less lewd option.
Watch out, they’ll get you!
10752372
I did not know that, but it honestly doesn’t surprise me one bit.
That’s not something anyone should ever do. Knives is dumb enough, TBH.
10752400
Played, and I’ve still got piles of cards but none of my friends have time to hang out and play, they’ve all got jobs and families now.
Well, it could be a lie. Sometimes I lie about characters not being important to the plot.
And yes, Mongolian Horse Friction, the best way to see trichromatic and understand triangles.
10752423
The ever-continuing evolution of home cleaning products in a magical society. Isn’t nature fascinating?
Maybe he’ll come around, or maybe he’ll wind up turning himself back into a human by the end of the story. Stay tuned and find out!
10753524
Oh, I’m sure she knows all about them.
She knows about yales, after all (and she also knows that they’re sometimes called centicores, hence the chapter title, but she never got a chance to say that in the story).
10753569
You do bring up a good point. A smell-proof bag, make it comfy inside, toss in scorpions every now and then for the occupant to snack on, and when needed, lob her into battle.
Sort of like a falconer, but weird.
10753810
It’s a fantastic choice and always pays dividends
This time instead of trying to use Google Translate, I just found a helpful ‘teaching Dutch’ video.
10753871
That’s entirely possible, and if it is, KitKat and the Wizard will have to decide if they want to stay anyway, or if they want to choose greener pastures. Or if they want to lure the yales into the cave . . . really depends on what they find in there.
10752054
I can, in fact, recognize that as a phone number, thanks to having baby boomers as parents.
When you have a single thing you're good at, everything looks like a nail? Er, wait, there was something about hammers too...