Season 2 Mini-Episode 3: "You Can Lead a Horse To Water..."
STAR TREK: PHOENIX
S02ME03
“You Can Lead a Horse To Water...”
Belle Hendricks quietly sipped her tea as she stared at the terminal screen on her desk, and the incoming message icon that continuously flashed in the bottom corner of the screen. For the first time since she left the friendly confines of her office in Vancouver for the Phoenix, she wished she could just let the call go to voicemail.
“Are you going to get that, Belle?” asked Inanna. She was perched nearby in the large plush chair that was normally occupied by their patients, sipping on a fresh cup of tea. Belle desperately wished she could possess half of the serenity that seemed to follow Inanna all the time.
Sometimes it made Belle laugh to think about it. She was the Vulcan and Inanna, the human. Yet their expected behavior was reversed. It’d certainly been on her mind when she first hired Inanna a few years ago or so. Half the reason Belle kept her hair long was to hide her ears so patients wouldn’t expect her to be cold and logical all the time.
Though lately, aboard the Phoenix, Belle found she didn’t need to hide anymore. Maybe it was the fact that the first officer was a winged unicorn, but the more time she spent with the Phoenix’s crew the more she found her assumptions about Starfleet tested and found wanting.
She hoped that it was just her assumptions that were wrong, that the Phoenix wasn’t a unicorn itself among the rest of Starfleet. It disturbed her a bit to think that Earth – the very heart of the Federation – might be less tolerant than Starfleet as a whole.
“Belle?”
“Hmm?” Belle looked up and set her tea cup down. “O-oh, right. Excuse me.” She tapped the accept button.
The face of Captain Liang appeared on her screen, his expression looking far less relaxed than the last time they had spoken. “Ah, Counselor. I was beginning to worry I had called when you were in the middle of a session. Is this a bad time?”
Belle gave him a professional smile. “No, Captain, I-I was just finishing up. What can I do for you?”
“I was hoping for an update on Ensign Sparkle.”
Belle exchanged a look with Inanna and sighed. “Well, we’ve had a couple of sessions with her, but we’ve not made much progress. Without going into details for confidentiality reasons… there’s a lot to unpack here. And there’s only so much a Counselor can do for a patient who doesn’t want to improve.”
A cold frown crossed Liang’s face. “She’s refusing to cooperate?”
Belle shook her head. “No. She’s coming to the counseling sessions, she’s listening to us, but it’s going to take a long time for her to adjust.”
“I see.” Liang steepled his hands and peered at her over them. “If I sound disappointed, it’s not because of you, Counselor. You see, I’ve recently had to file fresh reports on key members of the crew and senior staff with Starfleet command. It shouldn’t be a big surprise that those reports have included more than a few negative murmurs regarding ongoing, shall I say, sibling rivalry.”
Liang tapped the ends of his fingers together. “I’m fending off what I can, but there’s more than a few higher-ups who are lobbying to have one or both of them transferred. I shouldn’t have to say that such an outcome is one I’d very much like to avoid, especially for Commander Shimmer.”
“That would be a mistake, Captain,” Belle declared, meeting his frown with a frosty one of her own. “Twilight Sparkle is in a fragile emotional state. If we separate her from Sunset Shimmer now, she will never recover. As you said, things are indeed quite rough between the two of them, and I’ve heard many of the same murmurs you have. But they need to serve together to have any chance of mending things between them.”
Liang’s frown faded away as his whole body slumped. “...I realize that more than you know, Miss Hendricks. This situation is… well. No need to bring up memories of old failures.” He let out a heavy sigh. “Making what I’m about to say an order goes against my entire philosophy as a captain. So I’ll say it like this…”
He straightened up in his seat and stared her dead on. “Short of violating safety or ethical concerns, do whatever you can to at least put those two on the path to reconciliation by the time we reach Starbase 375. After that, I’m afraid all bets will really be off. Understood?”
Belle chafed under command structures. She hated them, even despised them. She understood the necessity, especially in an organization like Starfleet, but that didn’t mean she had to like it. So the fact he didn’t make it an order, but framed it as a suggestion… she appreciated that more than Liang would likely ever know. “I’ll do everything I can. I promise.”
“Good. And thank you, Counselor. Liang out.”
As his image disappeared from her screen, Inanna calmly stood up from her seat and walked over to Belle, placing a hand on her shoulder. “It is a difficult task he’s set for us,” she said.
“You’re telling me,” Belle groaned. She laid a hand upon her forehead. “I’ve been counseling Twilight ever since she first came to Earth. She was adorable back then, you know. Like a little lost puppy. Couldn’t even say the word Romulan correctly. And she’s made remarkable progress since then, but…”
“But she has many psychological issues,” Inanna said. She whisked her way back to her chair, her dress flowing around her in an invisible breeze. “Chief among them is her PTSD.”
“Yes,” Belle nodded as she brought up her extensive files on Twilight. “At least two instances… one from her initial arrival, then the loss of Sunset. Recovering from the first, while good, only made the second even worse.”
Inanna swept up her tea cup with one hand and drained it dry, then set it back down. “Indeed. Those are causing the lion’s share of her problems right now. She is stuck in a pattern of self-destructive behavior. She… hmm.”
Belle paused in the middle of reaching for her own tea cup. “What is it, Inanna?”
Inanna rose out of her chair and approached the tea pot, pouring herself a fresh cup and topping off Belle’s. “We’ve been extremely delicate with Twilight so far, carefully crafting every word, every expression we make so as to avoid triggering any of her issues.”
“And with good reason.” Belle sipped her tea, letting the taste of mint fill her mouth. “I learned very early on that the direct approach doesn’t work with Twilight. She recoils, she becomes irate, shouts back, and frequently stomps out. She did that to me a few times when she was younger… especially when she turned eleven. Puberty was harder on that poor mare than any human teenager I’ve ever seen.”
“Agreed, believe me. But while we’ve mostly avoided triggering her issues, we’ve not made much forward progress either,” Inanna pointed out as she swished her way back to her seat. “And we now have a deadline. I believe it is time for more drastic measures.”
“What’re you suggesting?”
Inanna inclined her head towards Belle’s terminal. “Give her exactly what she wants.”
“You mean we should say she’ll be transferred? But he’s already explained to her that if she doesn’t shape up he’ll have to transfer her,” Belle objected. She grabbed for her tea a bit rougher this time as her frustration built up. “And it didn’t seem to make a difference.”
“That’s because she doesn’t think it’s going to actually happen. If she did, she’d be acting exactly as she has been in the past weeks and months. In other words, she’s bluffing. Big time.”
“I don’t know about that. Did you see the way she treated Sunset on the bridge?”
“Not true,” Inanna said. She gazed at Belle, her eyes twinkling. “She was more reasonable than before.”
Belle shot Inanna a flat look, pounding a few buttons on her terminal then turned it to face Inanna. “Did you watch the same security footage I did?” She grunted as the brief confrontation between Twilight and Sunset played out. “She goads Sunset several times with pointed barbs then insists on things being professional only after she’s roused Sunset’s anger. And Sunset took it all out on poor Rodriguez.”
Inanna’s eyes twinkled all the more, accompanied by a sly smile. “I believe you should watch it for yourself again. Twilight’s words may be just as pointed, but it’s how she’s wielding them that’s changed. You’ll see.”
Rolling her eyes, Belle turned the terminal back to herself and watched the confrontation again. And again. By the third or fourth watch, however, her irritation with Inanna faded considerably. “Oh wait a minute,” she said. “You might be onto something here.”
Reaching for her tea, Inanna took a sip, her smile turning from sly to smug. “Out analyzed by a mere human? You’re slipping.”
“Oh hush,” Belle said with a laugh. “I can’t help it if I have so much more to do while on this ship.” She peered down at the terminal again. “But you’re right. She’s still goading Sunset, but instead of poking at Sunset with a rhetorical sword, she’s trying to shield herself instead.”
“Yeah,” Twilight scoffed. “Wouldn’t want to be trapped somewhere. People might think we’re dead.”
Sunset shrank back as she said, “Twilight–”
“With respect, Commander Shimmer,” Twilight cut her off, “I’d prefer we not be too familiar with each other. If that’s acceptable, ma’am.”
Sunset visibly winced. “R-right, of course, Ensign. My apologies.”
Belle snapped her fingers and pointed. “Computer, pause!” She leaned over and pointed at the screen. “Look, right there. See what she tried to do? She’s trying to establish a boundary. She’s trying to find a middle ground where they can work together without having their issues get in the way. But she’s not doing it very well.”
“No, not judging by Sunset’s later behavior,” Inanna agreed. “Twilight’s attempt is admirable given her emotional state, but… it's like she’s trying to approach all of her problems with a hammer instead of a scalpel. It’s good that we’ve identified all this, but it’s surely not enough to keep her aboard.”
“No, it’s not,” Belle said, nodding. “But it makes me think you’re right after all. If we’re blunt about it… it just might get through.”
“Then should I call her down here?” Inanna asked, sitting forward in her chair.
Belle considered that. “Computer, current time?”
“1445.”
“She works Alpha shift,” Belle said. “She’ll be off duty in a couple of hours. We’ll call her then.” She peered down at her terminal and checked her schedule, then sighed. “In the meantime I have two different appointments I need to prepare for.”
Belle watched Twilight’s hackles rise as she stepped inside, her eyes darting back and forth in concern. “Um, Belle?”
“I’m here,” Belle said as she waved from her usual chair. “Come on in.”
As Twilight trudged forward, Belle could almost see the dark cloud hovering over the mare’s head as she walked. “This better be quick. I’m starving.”
“We are sorry about that, Twilight, but I’m afraid it could not wait,” Inanna said.
“Uh huh,” Twilight groused as she took her usual seat. “So what’s this all about anyway? With all due respect, ma’ams, I’m tired, I’m hungry, and my next appointment isn’t for two more days. You both know how much I hate disruptions to my schedule.”
“We know that, Twilight. I know it’s disruptive,” Belle said. She glanced over at Inanna, who gave her a reassuring look. Belle steeled herself and took a deep breath, preparing for her next words. “We also know these sessions have become a burden for you, but you won’t have to suffer through them any longer. Your remaining sessions have been canceled.”
“Canceled? Why?” Twilight asked.
Inanna shrugged casually. “Because a few hours ago we received word from Captain Liang that your transfer has been approved.”
“...what?” Twilight gasped, her pupils shrinking to pinpricks. “B-b-but, no! No no I-I thought he was going to give me more time.”
Belle’s heart sank, but she persevered despite her misgivings. “I’m sorry, Twilight. But the Captain had no choice. Especially after that little dustup on the bridge the other day.”
Twilight’s breathing sped up til she was almost hyperventilating, sweat running down both sides of her face in rivulets. “But, but, no, no no no, I was… I told… I was trying to…”
“I believe you expressed to us that you wanted to be transferred, didn’t you?” Inanna said. “When you and Sunset had your last session together.”
Twilight’s face paled considerably, her jaw opening and closing like a fish. “That’s… I…” She shook her head like a ragdoll. “But I don’t want to leave the ship.”
“You don’t?” Inanna questioned, cocking her head curiously. “That’s not what you said to me the other day. To be honest, the Captain might just feel that he’s doing you a favor by separating the two of you.”
Twilight’s eyes flashed even as her breathing continued to speed up. “E-exactly, I… I want to… I do want to leave the ship.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Inanna said, spreading her hands open.
“I don’t…” Twilight sank into her chair. “I don’t know but something’s wrong.”
“But you just said this is what you wanted. You should be happy. Most ensigns never get transfer requests approved this quickly, if at all. Once we return to Starbase 375 you can step off the Phoenix and never see any of this ever again.”
Twilight cringed. “It is but it also… I… Augh, you’re confusing me. This is...I...” She clapped her hooves to her ears. “I’m getting overwhelmed, Belle! None of it makes sense! Make it make sense!”
“I’m sorry, Twilight. You know I wouldn’t normally push you when you’re overwhelmed like this.” Belle put on a sad expression, which wasn’t difficult given how much it hurt her to do this to Twilight. “But you said you wished you’d never come here. So I would think if anything this would make you happy, right? You don’t have to see Sunset anymore.”
Twilight burst into tears. “But… I don’t… I can’t…” She thrust her face forward into both forehooves. “But I don’t want to lose my sister!”
Belle sighed, and exchanged a look with Inanna, who nodded and set a steaming cup of tea in front of a sobbing, completely deflated Twilight. “I’m very happy to hear you finally say that.”
“Huh?” Twilight glanced up, her eyes still full of tears, and looked around the room in shock. “What do you… what?”
Belle sat forward and reached out a hand to set on Twilight’s shoulder. “What you just said proves to me you care about Sunset.”
Twilight drew back and snarled. “You tricked me!”
“Yes, we did, and we do apologize for the necessity,” Inanna said, bowing her head. “But we needed to get you to admit to yourself that you do care about Sunset, that you do want to remain here. If you didn’t care, you would’ve been happy to find out you were leaving.”
“And it wasn’t all a trick, either,” Belle added. “The Captain said it himself. The order to transfer you is all but official, unless something changes between now and the time we reach Starbase 375.” She pulled back from Twilight and set her hands in her lap. “And speaking for myself and Inanna, we’d very much like to report that something did in fact change.”
Twilight bounced out of her chair, though she paused rather than rushing out the door. “...I do care about Sunset, don’t I?” she whispered.
“Of course you care about her, Twilight,” Belle said with a smile. “She’s your sister.”
Twilight didn’t respond for several moments, till she decided to sit back down. Then she brought out her PADD. “It’s funny you say this. I just got this message from Smith and listened to it right before you called me in.” She set it on the table and hit play.
Belle listened patiently to the message, nodding at the end of every sentence. When Smith finished up with the offer of writing Twilight, she said, “I think you should consider Smith’s offer. You could use another friend to speak with.”
Twilight let out a bitter laugh. “Maybe. Heh, what a thing to bond over, right?” She shrugged lazily and slumped in her chair. “I can’t believe it. My therapists just did the verbal equivalent of slapping me upside the head.”
Belle reached out a hand but Twilight pushed it away immediately with a forehoof. Respectfully Belle backed off and scooted her chair away. “I’m sorry, Twilight. I didn’t want to do this. But… I know you need to be on this ship. You need to be close to your sister if you’re going to have a chance of recovery.”
“Recovery.” Twilight spat the word out like a foul piece of food. “Hah. Like that’s even possible with me anymore.”
“We believe it is,” Inanna said. “And so does Liang, or else he would not have given us a heads up that this was potentially coming at all.” She brought up her own PADD and showed Twilight the full message.
Twilight at first didn’t seem to notice it, but the longer it went on the more her ears quivered till she was staring at the PADD, open mouthed. “Wow. I’m surprised he cares.”
Belle smiled mirthlessly. “Believe it or not, we all care about you. Everyone who’s your friend aboard this ship has been hurt, repeatedly, by your harsh attitude and acting out of line. Yet despite that, all any of us want is for you to get better, to be better.”
“Really, huh?”
“Yes.” Inanna gave her a small smile. “While we cannot share what they have said inside this room of course, we can say that your sister is not the only one aboard whom you have injured in some way.”
Twilight’s eyes brimmed with tears once more. “I never wanted to hurt anyone. But… I’ve been hurting so much… It's like every day, all I want to do is lay in bed and hope like hell I don’t fall back asleep, because then I’ll have to suffer those… those nightmares.”
Belle winced, wishing desperately that she could tell Twilight about Sunset’s reported nightmares without violating every rule she held sacred as a counselor. “It would be a living nightmare for your friends if you were transferred away,” she said instead. “Especially for Sunset.”
“Don’t start with Sunset,” Twilight growled. “She’s the one I’m the most angry at. I…” she let out another bitter laugh. “I was going to say I didn’t care about her, but that’d be a lie now, wouldn’t it?” She let out a long sigh. “If anything… I just want to stop fighting. I don’t want to argue with her anymore. I don’t want to hear her insisting that I shape up or see her shove her command authority in my face.”
“But,” Twilight continued as she sat up. “I… I don’t want her to go away either.” She bowed her head and tears dripped onto Belle’s carpet. "I want to hear her apologize and mean it. It hurt so much having her gone… I’ve already lost my home planet, my parents, my brother, and everything in between. I can’t go through losing her again. I can’t!” She wailed as she cried anew. “I can’t lose her again… I can’t…”
Inwardly Belle’s heart soared in triumph. Real, definitive progress… they’d finally made it. They’d gotten through to her at last. “She doesn’t want to lose you either, Twilight. And the only way you’re going to keep her is if you work on your behavior.”
Twilight nodded wordlessly as she sniffled, wiping at her muzzle with her foreleg. “I’ll try. I’m not sure what to do though.”
“Start just as you did when you first arrived here – with the basics,” Inanna said simply. “Be nice. Apologize if you say something hurtful, don’t interrupt your superiors, follow orders.”
“So…” Twilight looked up and laughed again. This time rather than sounding bitter, it lingered just a bit, like the laugh of one relieved of an immense burden. “Act like a Starfleet officer rather than a spoiled brat?”
“You know I’d never call you a spoiled brat, Twilight,” Belle said. “But essentially, yes. Act like the officer you trained to be, that we all know you can be.”
Twilight stood from her chair in a motion that suggested she’d fall into a heap on the floor. “Okay,” she said with a shudder. “I think I get the idea.”
“And don’t forget apologies,” Inanna added. “They don’t hurt.”
“Okay.” Twilight repeated and moved to leave. “I’ll try.”
Belle watched Twilight leave, then let out a massive sigh of relief. “Well! That went better than expected, didn’t it?”
Inanna frowned, seemingly unconvinced to Belle’s eyes. “I am not certain it went well. I am concerned by the fact Twilight wasn’t more upset with us for tricking her.”
Belle thought about that for a moment, then winced. “Oh dear. You’re suggesting she was telling us what we wanted to hear?”
“I am hoping I am wrong, but…”
Belle checked her schedule and let out an irritated grunt. “Okay. I’m going to go check on her then. Can you handle my 1800 appointment?”
Inanna bowed her head in acceptance. “Of course, Belle. Go ahead.”
Belle wasted no time in hurrying out the door. Thanks to her position as Counselor she was well aware of the location of the quarters of each of her most at-risk patients, so when she reached the set that belonged to Twilight and Preta she immediately tapped on the door chime.
“Enter!”
As the doors swished open for Belle, she spotted Preta Re’l sitting at one of the twin desks. “I’m sorry to bother you, Ensign,” Belle said. “Is Twilight here?”
Re’l tapped a single claw to her chin then shrugged. “Only momentarily. She came in, changed out of her uniform, then said she was going out again.”
“Did she say where?”
Re’l shook her head. “No. Why?”
Belle smiled politely. “I’m just trying to locate her so I can speak with her about a private matter.”
Nodding in understanding, Re’l pointed to the combadge on her chest. “Don’t forget you can ask the computer.”
Blinking once, Belle sighed and just barely resisted the urge to smack herself in the head. “Right. Of course. Good day, Ensign.” She stepped far enough away for the doors to close then tapped her badge. “Computer, locate Ensign Twilight Sparkle.”
“Ensign Twilight Sparkle is in holodeck four.”
“Holodeck?” Belle repeated, worry setting into her heart. “Where is that?”
A series of panels lit up along the wall. “Follow the lighted panels to your destination.”
As she did so Belle cursed herself for not bothering to memorize more of the ship’s layout than she had. But Starfleet ships always seemed to her like beehives or ant hills, so chock full of intersecting passageways, hidden crawl spaces, and vaguely marked rooms that always left her head spinning.
Once there, she attempted to walk through the holodeck doors, only for them to buzz at her. “What… why can’t I go inside?”
“The current user has requested privacy.”
Frowning, Belle moved over to the panel outside and checked to see what program was running. As she suspected, it was the Equestria program, which given recent events could be a good method of catharsis for Twilight, or could be a way she’d throw every last bit of progress down the toilet.
As the Counselor, Belle was one of the few aboard ship with the authority to override this lockout. But if she barged on in she’d only be adding more fuel to a potential fire. And if there wasn’t she’d probably create one just by barging in unannounced.
So with a sigh, she tapped her combadge again. “Hendricks to Sparkle.”
After a long silence that nearly prompted her to repeat herself, the reply came. “Belle?”
Belle silently pumped a fist. “Twilight, I’m outside the holodeck. May I come in please?”
Another long pause. Then finally a weak “...okay.”
The holodeck doors wheezed open, allowing Belle entry. She slipped inside swiftly before Twilight could change her mind.
“Wow…”
Despite showing some interest in the idea originally, Twilight had never extended an invitation to Belle or Inanna to see this particular program. And at the moment, Belle could almost see why. Unless one knew Twilight or her sister, and knew their story, they’d surely assume this was nothing more than some interactive children’s holonovel.
Belle found herself standing in the middle of what looked to be the front entrance of a huge castle. Ornately carved pillars soared above her, holding up high arched ceilings. Sunlight streamed through the many windows and skylights, casting an almost surreal glow to the entire space. She looked down and stared at the smooth marble floors, polished to a mirror shine that brought out its pearlescent coloration.
“Did they really build all this?” Belle muttered as she spun in a slow circle, jaw hanging open.”
“Pardon me, miss,” spoke up a quiet voice. Belle glanced everywhere until she looked down, spotting a unicorn mare wearing some sort of maid’s outfit. A nametag hanging from her collar pronounced her name as Ribbon. “I’m sorry, but the castle is closed for tours today.”
Belle found herself grinning as she replied, “Oh, no, I’m not here for a tour. I’m trying to find Twilight Sparkle.”
Ribbon blinked in confusion. “I don’t recognize that name, I’m sorry. Maybe you’ll find her in the foyer? It’s that way.” Ribbon pointed to the south.
“Thank you, I’ll try searching there,” Belle said, giving Ribbon a polite wave as she walked off.
As Belle wandered to the south, she found herself passing through a long hallway, lined with floor to ceiling stained glass windows and various carvings, busts, and tapestries. Belle was drawn to one of the first she stepped past, which seemed to focus on a huge pony with a coat of dark blue, almost black, with a pair of great feathered wings and a horn far longer than the one Sunset or Twilight bore. A splotch of black and a crescent moon on each flank of the winged unicorn made Belle wonder what significance this pony had. “Another Princess, maybe?” she wondered.
A few others caught her eye. One focused on a stallion with the largest, curliest beard she’d ever seen, wearing a cloak lined with stars and with plenty of petite, shining bells sewn into the hem. A stereotypical wizard hat completed the ensemble. A hero of some sort, she concluded.
Still others caught her wandering eye until she finally found herself approaching a massive foyer lined with even more tapestries and carvings, and dozens of ponies milling about in orderly queues in front of a massive set of doors. But she still didn’t see Twilight. So, after briefly rolling her eyes at the thought, she approached one of the guards. “Excuse me, I’m looking for Twilight Sparkle.”
The guard glared at her from underneath his helmet, then stomped his spear once. “Twilight Sparkle is currently meeting with Princess Celestia. You must be the guest they’re expecting.” He gestured with the spear to a smaller door on the adjacent wall opened up as he pointed at it. “That way, ma’am.”
“Thank you,” Belle said, chuckling to herself as she approached the smaller door. It led into a side passage that ended in another door which, when opened, revealed an outdoor patio.
Belle had seen still images of Princess Celestia, the mare that both Sunset and Twilight claimed controlled the sun on their home planet. In her head she had a concept of the size of said alicorn.
Her concept paled in comparison to the holographic version, which rose to her hooves from a nearby table. The giant pony, a misnomer if ever there was one, towered over Belle at least half a meter taller at the shoulder. Belle’s eyes locked onto the mare’s slender, incredibly tapered horn that looked more than long enough to turn her into a skewer in an instant.
But the mare showed no sign of aggression. Celestia smiled, her expression one of polite welcoming. “Ah, Miss Belle!” she said in a rich, warm voice ringing with motherly intent. “Please, join us.”
“Okay then,” Belle muttered under her breath as she approached the table. Only once Celestia sat back down did she spot Twilight also sitting at the table, wearing one of the sundresses she’d favored so often prior to joining the Academy. The table bore a tea set of elegant porcelain and dishes of silver, with a plate of scones and other tasty treats sitting next to it.
As she sat next to Twilight, she decided to roll with the scenario, at least for the time being. “Thank you for inviting me. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Your Highness.”
Judging by Twilight’s arched eyebrow, that might not have been the right thing to say. But the holographic Celestia didn’t seem to mind. “Oh, of course. Any friend of my trusted student is a friend of mine. Please, call me Celestia.” Celestia’s horn lit to pick up the teapot, pouring Belle a steaming cup.
“Of course, Celestia,” Belle replied. With a shrug she picked up the tea cup and sipped at it. Like anything ingestible in the holodeck, it was real replicated tea, albeit not of a kind Belle favored. “Err, I hope I didn’t interrupt your conversation.”
“Not at all. Twilight was just talking to me about how her studies have been progressing,” Celestia said. The hologram turned to Twilight and gestured with a forehoof. “Please, continue.”
Twilight glanced at Belle, bit at her lip some, then called out, “Computer, freeze program.”
The holographic Celestia froze in place instantly, as did everything around them. “Why are you here, Belle?”
Belle reached for the tea cup again to give her something to do with her hands. “I wanted to check on you. And apologize again, if necessary.”
“What, for tricking me?” Twilight snorted and reached for a scone, gulping it down in one bite. “It’s fine. I needed the shock.”
“You did. On that Inanna and I agree. But still...” Belle wondered. “I… wanted to be sure. It wasn’t something I’d ever do normally, and I hope you know that.”
Twilight let out a wry chuckle. “Of course I know that, Belle. You’ve only been my therapist for over half my life. I think I know how you operate by now.”
“Still. Given your current state, It might’ve–”
“Stop.” Twilight held up a hoof, her glare turning ice cold for a moment before it defrosted. “Please stop calling me fragile. I’m not made of glass. I’m stronger than that.”
Belle inclined her head to concede the point. “Of course. That’s not what I was implying.”
Twilight shrugged and reached for another scone. This one she savored, taking several short bites before finishing it. “I know. Still feels like it. I’m… I can take care of myself.” She grabbed up yet another scone and devoured it. “I’m fine.”
Only Belle’s professionalism kept her from frowning slightly in disgust at how Twilight stuffed herself. That, and her knowledge that binge eating was all too common a coping mechanism. She thanked the heavens for Twilight’s regular, Starfleet-ordered exercise. “If you’re sure.” Belle reached for her own scone and nibbled at it. “Do you mind if I ask what you were doing in here?”
Shrugging again, Twilight replied, “Just trying to take my mind off things. I come here often, you know. It helps… helps remind me what I’m looking for.”
“Celestia said you were telling her about your studies,” Belle said.
“...sometimes it’s nice to pretend like I’m living the life I was supposed to,” Twilight admitted. Then she looked up at Belle, her face twisted in dismay. “It’s not escapism. I’m… I’m not addicted. I don’t do it that often.”
“Settle down, Twilight, I know that,” Belle said, holding up both hands for calm. “Like you said, I have been your therapist for over half your life. I can also tell when someone’s holoaddicted, and you don’t fit the profile.”
Twilight visibly relaxed and reached for her tea cup to drink. “Okay.” She set it down and faced Belle. “I’m going to take your advice. I’m… I’m going to try, and I mean it. I don’t want to leave this ship.” She shivered. “All I’ve ever wanted is to find home again. I don’t want to lose the best chance I have.”
“You really think the Phoenix represents your best chance, hmm?”
“I do.” Twilight hopped off her chair and trotted around the patio, pausing to look at Celestia, still frozen in mid tea refill.
Belle stood from her chair and walked over to stand next to the seated Celestia. Even seated Celestia towered over her. “She’s so beautiful,” Belle said, meaning every word. “I love her hair… how does she get it to flow like that?”
Twilight chuckled. “It’s… an alicorn thing. Something to do with their magic.”
“But Sunset’s hair doesn’t flow like that,” Belle said, still enamored by the sight.
“Not yet. Maybe someday.” Twilight tugged at Belle’s shirt sleeve with her magic. “Come on, follow me.”
Belle followed Twilight back inside, taking one last glance over her shoulder at the Princess, still bearing that serene smile even while frozen. Twilight seemed to navigate the castle with ease, quickly moving through the criss-crossing hallways, through the foyer Belle had seen previously, and out to what looked to be a central courtyard.
“Over there is the school I was going to attend,” Twilight said, pointing with one hoof to a cylindrical tower with a rounded dome on top. “It would’ve been like a combination of elementary, middle, and high school for me. I would’ve been going there till I was eighteen, then transferring to Canterlot University.”
“I’m guessing you were hoping you might be Celestia’s personal student,” Belle said.
Twilight shook her head. “No… that was Sunset’s thing. I don’t… I doubt she would’ve taken me as a student even if I passed my exam. Then again, I don’t know what would’ve happened if the mirror hadn’t sucked me away. I still don’t know what caused my magic surge. Probably never will.”
She continued to trot in the direction of the castle gates. “Honestly I only indulge in that aspect of the program because Sunset programmed it that way. I checked into the code. She made it so that Celestia sees either Sunset or me as her student, whichever one is in the program.”
“What if you’re both here?”
Twilight frozen in place. A haunted look shone in her eyes as she grit her teeth and glanced back over her shoulder. “I don’t know.”
Belle smiled back, hoping to set Twilight at ease. “Maybe one day you can find out.”
“Maybe,” Twilight growled in a voice that clearly demonstrated she wanted that line of conversation to end. “This way.”
Twilight led Belle past a final set of guards and out into the streets of Canterlot proper. “Welcome to my hometown, Belle. I’ve made a few changes to it over time based on… what little I can remember.”
Belle took in the details, the wide plaza strewn with market stalls and other vendors, the long streets full of restaurants and shops, the various ponies frozen in the middle of their happy lives. “It looks like a peaceful place.”
“It was. Is.” Twilight shrugged. “I didn’t pay much attention to it at the time. I spent most of my time reading.”
Belle chuckled. “I’m hardly surprised to hear that. You’re a regular bookworm, Twilight.”
That caused Twilight’s muzzle to crinkle in something resembling a smile. “And you encouraged it, by the way. You turned me onto all sorts of fascinating stories, especially from Earth’s 20th and 21st century.”
Belle held out her hands and shrugged. “What can I say? It’s the era I like to read most. It’s refreshing to remind myself of how things once were on Earth, back when we came close to annihilating ourselves. The Eugenics Wars, World War III, climate change, ecological disasters…” she shook her head. “It produced a lot of interesting literature as a result.”
“Though some of it was stranger than others,” Twilight mused as they meandered through the streets. “Visual novels, for one.”
“Oh yes, those,” Belle smiled. “Some of my favorites. Early to mid 21st century; what an assortment of strange and wonderful stories they made with such brilliant art and music to accompany it. Makes me wonder what those same writers would’ve done with a holodeck.”
Twilight laughed, a cheerier laugh than her usual these days. “I think I remember this one series Sunset would not shut up about while she went to the Academy. It was a Japanese murder mystery series that one of her classmates had turned her on to. Dangan...something.” She clapped her hoof on the ground. “Danganronpa, that’s it.”
“Oh I remember that all too well,” Belle replied. “She wanted to create a holonovel version of it; I had to talk her out of it because her grades were starting to slip.”
Peals of laughter came from Twilight as she paused, having to hold her chest. “Oh was that a fiasco or what? Mother and Mom were so mad with Sunset because she got a B on one of Mom’s exams. She assigned Sunset so much extra homework that Sunset had to beg me to help her out with it.”
“It’s a wonderful memory, isn’t it?” Belle commented.
Twilight slowed down her trotting as they turned a corner, her happy mood fading slowly away. “...it was.”
“You’ve got a lot of happy memories with her, don’t you?”
Sighing, Twilight stopped entirely and faced Belle. “I know what you’re doing. You don’t have to prod me further; I already said I’d try.”
“Can you blame me for wanting to make sure?” Belle said. She held out a hand and after a moment’s hesitation, Twilight set her hoof in it. “Twilight, as much as I’m your therapist, and Sunset’s too… I’m also a friend. Can I tell you a secret?”
“A secret?” Twilight repeated, her eyebrows shooting up to crest her forehead. “What kind of secret?”
“Nothing harmful, I assure you.” Belle squeezed Twilight’s hoof gently. “I’ve never admitted this because I was afraid it would compromise my ability to stay professional, but… sometimes, I think of you and your sister like the nieces I never had.”
Twilight’s mouth fell open. “Really?”
“Yes, really.” Belle felt a warmth in her heart rise to lift her smile. “I care about both of you. More than I should, if you were to ask the rule books governing my line of work. I hope you believe me when I saw I haven’t let any of that compromise my ability to treat either of you. But I admit that I’ve grown attached to you two nonetheless. When Sunset came back, I was so happy… to be honest, that’s part of how she managed to talk me into accepting this post. Because I knew I’d get to see both of you.”
“...wow,” Twilight muttered. “I’m… I don’t know what to say.”
Belle squeezed Twilight’s hoof again. “The two of you fighting so much… It's been painful to watch, just as I know it has hurt your friends, and your parents. Inanna’s managed to stay more aloof, but she hasn’t known you or Sunset nearly as long as I have.” She set Twilight’s hoof down. “When Liang told me he might have to transfer you, well… I knew that would destroy you. I couldn’t bear the thought of that happening to you. To either of you.”
Twilight’s eyes misted as she gave Belle a watery smile. “Wow,” she said again. “I’m… I’m touched, Belle. That’s… that’s nicer than I frankly deserve, given how I’ve treated everyone lately.”
“Not at all. On the contrary, you deserve as much kindness as any of us can show.”
Twilight’s eyes widened considerably at the word ‘kindness.’
"You're not a bad person, Twilight. Nor are you malicious or evil. You've suffered things the rest of us could have never imagined before now, and you've been lashing out because you're hurt and scared. If anything, it's all of us who have let you down by not recognizing it clearly before now.”
Gasping, Twilight whispered, “I, are you sure?”
Belle’s smile turned mischievous. “Would I say it if I weren’t?”
“...no. No you wouldn’t.” Twilight leaned back on her hooves and rocked for a moment, lost heavily in thought. Then she abruptly rushed forward and embraced Belle around the middle. “Thank you for caring, Belle.”
“Of course, Twilight,” Belle said as she returned the hug. “Like I said, you matter to me.” She released the mare. “So what do you say we leave the holodeck? You can plan what you’re going to say to Sunset when she gets back. And maybe give a few apologies to a couple of friends, like Miss Re’l.”
“Sure,” Twilight said. “I can try… no.” She shook her head and set a determined look on her face. “I will. I’ll do it. I’ll do everything I can to, to shape up, and stay on the Phoenix. I promise.”
This time when Belle heard it, she believed it whole-heartedly. “Good,” she said. “Good. Computer, show us the exit please. End program.”
As the holodeck program faded into black and gold lines and they walked out the wheezing doors together, Belle found herself feeling hopeful. If Sunset and Twilight could make amends, there was a chance for them to find their long lost home after all. She doubted either could do it on her own; they needed to work together.
So she crossed her fingers and prayed with all her might that she was right.
Blue would like to convey that a larger AN will be following up on the events of this and future episodes at some point soon.
As for me, I wanted to use this to show what's been going on inside Twilight's head this whole time. Some of you expressed concern she's just an acting out nutcase or something along those lines. Not true at all.
And I wanted to give Belle and Inanna some more time to shine. We'll get to see more of them, no worries.
As for the reference dropped, I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. Fanfiction lets you get away with this kind of thing. 
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I really hope the Holodeck has a lot of work put into its data handling of permanence and otherwise interactions etc.
Next time, or over the times if the complelxity is great enough, various instancesstartto build collections of discontinuities, which start to interfere with steady running of routines?
I am now curious how someone with a Gibbs personality would do in Starfleet
The childhood she'd expected to have got taken away from her. If anything, she should have more issues.
applauds
Very good, Twilight. Hard to admit that you've been a fool. Not even you knew what you wanted. Thank Belle for the reality bitchslap and go do what we KNOW you can do- be a friendly trained Starfleet officer who knows what she's doing.
Or, at least APPEAR to be that way. It'll keep you in the Counselor's good graces.
I wouldn't say Twilight nutcase. She has legit issues. My complaint was that it took too long to nip this issue in the butt. She needed that slap to the face long ago to wake her up. Glad she finally got it.
Actually, I wonder if Sunset will make that Danganronpa Holonovel...and then in typical scifi fashion the Junko Enoshima becomes self aware and turns off the safeties.
10894305
Watch Discovery.
*Bites tongue about further thoughts on the chapter and the implications going forward thereof.*
10894326
To be fair, even in canon she got the life Sunset should have had rather than having her own.
Yeah. That's right, isn't it? If Sunset hadn't have gotten a severe case of egomania, Twilight would have lived a more normal life. Too bad canon Twilight never figured that out.
An ultimatum.
Yes, that'll get us moving away from all this drama between Twilight and Sunset.
This was a much needed insight to what's going on with Twilight. I know the nightmares had been mentioned but we've never actually seen what they've been about. I wonder if there's some greater significance to it. 🤔 I also liked how it connected to the last minisode with Twilight having just received Smith's message.
Also appreciated getting to see more of Belle. I realized the other she's like a reverse Mr. Spock. He's half-Vulcan but goes full-on Vulcan, and she's half-Vulcan but goes full-on human.
Ah, the great ironies that arise in alternate universe fanfictions.
Looking Ten-Forward to the next installment. Keep up the good work.
10894345
She didn't need to figure it out, Sunset spelled it out in dialogue in the first Equestria Girls movie.
10894351
Point taken. Good thing for Twilight's sanity that she believes in destiny.
I wonder how Shining Armor is taking loosing Twilight? I hope he fully believes she is alive when everyone else thinks she is dead.
10894305
Ha! When I was going through editing this, I suggested switching this to a slap upside the head because that's what Gibbs would do. So happy someone caught it! :D
/dmn it Dinozo!
10894329
Yep! Sometimes it really can take far longer than we might think for someone to fully recognize that they have issues AND identify them. Heck, they're usually literally the last one to figure it out.
10894364
Pretty sure he's more or less permanently stuck in a changeling pod and doesn't have the mental wherewithal to contemplate his sister.
10894303
This was strictly a one-time reference drop for the sake of reference dropping. This isn't turning into an IHW sequel by any stretch of the imagination. 
I'm not sure I understand your question, but if you're worried about us having a holodeck safety failure episode? Probably won't happen. Waaay too cliche for Trek. I'd like to think I can avoid falling back on Trek cliches.
10894326
Yup. That's the first PTSD episode that Belle mentions. The second one is the loss of Sunset.
10894329
Indeed. Poor Twilight was so lost in her issues she never would've seen it otherwise.
10894336
Oh no, no no no. Nothing like that.
10894342
100% true. I think even canon acknowledges that, albeit indirectly.
10894346
Yup, reverse Spock was part of what I was going for with her character. That, and a lot of her personality is based upon fantasy elves from various anime and western books. And also me poking fun at Vulcans in general, because I find the way canon handles their emotional stuff to be a little bit unrealistic at times.
As for the nightmares, we'll see.
Maybe we'll find out one day.
10894364
Good question.
10894386
More than indirectly. And even if it didn't, Twilight's unfitness for the life she led in canon is manifest.
I can’t lie, this chapter feels rushed. Twilights emotional heel-turn doesn’t feel 100% deserved to me. I have trouble believing she, after failing to improve her attitude at every option before now, would change so quickly. After chapter 12, it felt like it would take a miracle to get her to change her mind, and now the instant she realizes she still loves her sister she does a complete 180.
That being said, the sooner the drama ends the better. This is a 10/10 fic when the Twilight-Sunset drama isn’t happening, no joke. The first 8 chapters are some of the greatest FanFiction I’ve ever read, same with most of episode 9. Unfortunately, it’s like a 5/10 when it’s in focus, which it has been a lot lately. I’d prefer a rushed end to the subplot over a drawn-out one any day.
I’m being a bit harsh. I suppose. After the initial therapy session, the moment in the holodeck was actually really nice. It’s just a really cool setting, for one, the recreation of equestria. Also, unlike her out-of-nowhere realization she doesn’t want to lose her sister, I do believe her being told their fighting is hurting the ones she loves would get to her.
Overall, I’m a bit mixed on the chapter, but hopeful for the future. It seems like this subplot finally closing in on a conclusion, and that’s something to be excited about! Hopefully, we’ll get some Twilight narration soon that isn’t defined by her hatred of Sunset lol.
10894389
All of this critique is fair. This whole subplot has been... a mixed bag. It made so much sense at first, but the more I wrote it, and the further it went on, the more I regretted it.
For what it's worth, Twilight's sudden out seemingly out of nowhere realization only feels that way because we can't see her thoughts in this moment. If we could have, it would've felt more reasonable, because I could have shown what went through her head. TLDR: lots of flashbacks plus a realization of how stupid she was being. This is a thing that happens to people who are mentally ill in one respect or another. Is it rational? Nope. But it does happen. It's happened to me on many occasions.
Anyways, thank you for the fair critique.
Nice Chapter and I do suppose that is one way to decompress.
Nice to see Twilight willing to take the first step to mend the rift between her and Sunset, it's far from the last for either of them but as Princess Skystar and Pinkie would say, it only "One Small Thing" to start something great
Awesome character moments throughout and as always eager for more
10894428
Edit team here. Thanks so much! :)
10894389
I'll probably be putting a lengthy AN together in a few episodes, detailing some of the original plans and such with SunTwi's relationship.
But, it is what it is. Along with my, and our, feelings about it.
Finally, We see some progress with Twilight's issues, honestly, I was getting a little tired with the drama between her and Sunset. I know that psychological trauma required time to be "fixed", and Sunset and Twilight will still at odds for a while, but It's good to now that their relationship will be getting better, probably fixed by the end of this season, if I have to guess.
In another note (and as random thought), Danganronpa as a holonovel may be a terrifying experience, but I just got introduced to 'Doki Doki Literature Club', and now I can't stop thinking how a holonovel version of that game could ruin somebody's day more than anything else.
10894389
Not all plans that seem good turn out the way you want.
Glad to see Twily starting to acknowledge that she's got problems. And that she's pushing the people in her life away. Now, whether the lessons stick is another matter entirely.
amazing chapter.
grate righting team.
10894428
Thank you kindly.
10894441
For what it's worth, I was getting tired of writing it too... I want to go back to writing them as sisters.
10894487
Oh do I know that.
10894489
We'll see.
10894582
Thank you.
Well, that's half of the problem ...
Finally. Something gets through.
10894441
... Now I'm going to need a gallon of brain bleach if I don't want to wake up screaming.
10894557
Like Dewdrop said, thank you for giving this a read, and thank you very very much for all your feedback and thoughts. :)
Huh, I guess Twilight and Sunset didn’t need to face the sirens together to start working out their problems after all. Glad Twilight is finally starting to get better, even if she still has a ways to go.
10894373
By it's very nature...
Where was it that you found your car keys...?
In the very last place you look..
I'm glad you all fixed this...it was becoming very tiresome.
I would have gone more in the vein of Twilight trying harder and harder to ignore the issues she was feeling, and becoming more and more stressed as she tried to be the 'best' for everyone else. We've seen her go to incredible lengths to meet expectations, while Twilight the pony becomes buried by her own internal inertia...
It was an interesting try, going this way; but one I myself would not have used. This part of the story arc fit the personality of Sunset, rather than Twi...
Hope they look into Twi's other problem. Her not liking that her Big sister is now both her princess and her CO and she has to do what she is told. She keeps harping on Sunset "using her command authority", after all. So far Sunset hasn't abused it, save when Twi was acting like a spoiled brat, yet Twi keeps talking about it being "shoved in her face."
I don't think she is taking her sister being raised above her very well, witch is Ironic given who they are.
10895105
I plan on detailing the original plans over the whole SunTwi conflict in an episode where the plans would no longer be considered a spoiler. And the how/why we changed them and such.
But, i think it got tiresome for us as well (both writing it and seeing its reception created a downward spiral), and we're glad we at least found some way to end it decently... as quickly as possible.
10895214
That's all surface level symptoms. That's her finding a conscious level excuse for her unconscious problems, ie finding something to blame. That wasn't what was actually bothering her--it was just the easiest thing she could think of for why she was mad, so she didn't have to think about her real problems.
10895105
You're not wrong. As Blue said we were getting pretty tired of this plot, and it's one that will get adjusted in a master edit. When the story is near complete or complete I plan on going back and massaging it, giving it one last go over to fix things, iron out plot details, and so on.
The Twilight/Sunset antagonism subplot will receive the most attention by far. Looking back there are many ways it could have been done in a way that the readers would have enjoyed more, that I would have enjoyed in writing, and so forth. Because I lost track of something when I was writing this.
I forgot that the readers, all of you, you're not me. You haven't spent decades figuring out mental health issues and coming to an understanding of those who act out as a result. When I look at Twilight's actions, I don't get upset the way most of the readers did. I feel sad for her. I can see she's hurting, that something's wrong, that she needs help. That something needs to be done. So because of this... I wrote everything with the mistaken assumption the readers would see it that way too.
That's why it will need editing. Not now, not while the story is in progress, but by the end we'll work all this out in a way that should make rereading the story far more enjoyable at these parts than it might be otherwise.
I want to thank all of you for continuing to persist with the story despite this subplot, and I hope that, as we move towards it being settled, and we get back into the real heart of the story, you will all find it returns to that which drew you to it in the first place.
I have to admit that while I'm mostly glad to see Twilight acting more like Twilight, I do wish we'd gotten to see her thoughts as she started to absorb what Belle and Inanna were saying. Maybe certain parts of mini-episodes like this one could be absorbed into full episodes in the big edit? At the very least, I hope we maybe flash back to this moment from Twi's POV in a full episode. In the meantime, I'm glad she's at least starting to heal.
In my opinion, it's worth a lot to know that. Makes me feel a bit less guilty for my previous comments and the PM.
10895241
Personally, I can see it now, myself, but only because it was pointed out to me both in the comments and the story. The same can be said of Sunset's selfishness, though I have to admit I still understand Sunset's issues a lot better and have more tolerance for them than Twilight's.
On that note, I want to apologize. I know I've said "sorry" several times on the private message, but I want to say it publicly. I'm sorry we forced you to alter your plans, despite that it might be better this way. Mostly, I apologize for the brutality of our criticism and the effects on you and your team's morale and mental states. I don't think it was anyone's intention to dishearten you, it certainly wasn't mine, but that doesn't change that it happened and that we forcibly altered what you wanted to do with your story.
And I'm deeply sorry about how insensitive our comments concerning Twilight doubtlessly are to someone like you. More than anything, I hate the fact that I can't completely understand issues like these....
I'm sorry.
(...Also, perfect music for the ending of this mini-episode:)
10896328
It's one of those things I've been meaning to do, I just never actually get around to doing it. Kinda like my own writing, now that I think about it... lmao
Yea! Friendship!
I really hope Sunset and Twilight can reconsile with ezchbother.
Also i've been wondering about Georgi's reaction to Sunset's message when she returned. Would that be another mini-episode?
I wouldn't find this too surprising, necessarily. I would imagine that, even with everything else, Earth is still the human homeworld and thus still mostly populated by humans; Starfleet, being a distributed organization that recruits from the entire Federation, would have a much broader demography.
... and just how did Sunset know about that, then?
And also for the scones being holograms.
I have to say, this felt... sudden -- Twilight was obstinate and obtuse for so long without sign of improvement, then she gets one scare and suddenly improves. It doesn't exactly feel... organic, I suppose.
I guess I'll have to see how this shapes up. Consciously deciding something is one thing; actually internalizing it is quite another.
10897730
Agreed. It's not that organic, because the intended organic shift would've taken a lot longer. As in the entire rest of the season longer.
At this point nothing we do with this arc will make people happy so we might as well end it and move on.
10897455
We'll find out about that at a later appropriate time.
10897123
I'd like to think that creating characters is one of the things I'm best at, and, well, I did do a lot of work on the foundations on nearly every character (I like to brag for praise) lol. In all seriousness though, the one thing I've noticed that not a lot of people realize is that you can't look at it as creating a character, you're creating a person (or people). Each one needs to be alive, that way the story can be alive. I think I did a good job on that.
10897730
Yeah, the conclusion for the arc wasn't as organic as we wanted... when it comes time to discuss the original plans (which will probably be around ep15 or 16), I'll disclose some of the ideas we were building with it which we scrapped. At this point, we just wanted that subplot over with too. If/when there is a 'remastered' version, that portion will be... very different. lol
10897831
"I didn't want to write it anymore" was and remains a much better reason to abort the arc than "it wasn't pleasing the audience," honestly. Who cares what we think?
10894386
What?! But it's not Star Trek without a holodeck safety failure! Next you're telling us there won't be any transporter malfunctions, or heavy-handed racism allegories, or an episode where someone turns into a giant lizard because they go too fast, or they don't run into a being claiming to be god or homicidal AI!
This seems like it ought to be a main chapter instead of a side thing, but that's just my opinion. Great chapter nonetheless.
10897730
Idunno about the rest, but what makes you think Sunset wouldn't be aware of the existence of Luna, or at least a decoration depicting her? Even if she was still the Mare in the Moon when Sunset left, she existed as Princess Luna before then, and ruled alongside her sister. Since Celestia neither hid that from her people nor fell into disrespect of her sister, it wouldn't at all be unexpected to see Luna depicted somewhere in the castle as she was before she turned to villainy.