• Member Since 26th Feb, 2014
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She's looking at you. Yes you. And she is judging you with her eyes. There is no escape.



Luna becomes the Princess of Detention. It's not because she was naughty. Stuck atop her lofty tower, it is up to her captives to save her from herself.

If only she didn't write her own demerits.

Now part of a trilogy. Because these things happen. Next up in the series is The Foundling, and this will be followed up with Princess Luna & the Curious Case of the Bitch Fish.

Chapters (8)
Comments ( 135 )

I'm kinda lost on what the story is trying to achieve or do.

It's about celestia helping luna by having her help others. Or something, I don't know, I haven't finished reading it yet, and neither have you.

Well, Luna just found her spymaster or bat colt (batman) or dare bat (Dare Devil) not sure which at this point.

Well this is going to be pretty awesome. Already off to a good start.

Canterlot has always been the capital of Equestria, Celestia has always been the ruler of Equestria and friendship has been and always will be magic.

This is a completely independent work with no connection or relation to anything else.

I know what you mean, but... fanfiction.

I don't get it. Sorry. Two words does not a sentence make.

I find myself feeling rather bad for Overcast at times, and Luna vacillates between being sympathetic and seeming to be cruel (although she only implicitly acts on the cruelty).

To think of it, she feels the same about Celestia. Divided in her own thoughts. It's sympathetic and infuriating and I want to see more.

It wwe wrestler he also called the lunatic fringe.

I love stuff like this. Seeing unique teaching moments that improve both the punish-er and the punish-ee (even if fictional) are fun.

All hail the Princess of Detention! Sharer of harsh truths and banisher of the convenient lies of history! Hail! HAIL!!:pinkiecrazy:

Thank goodness nopony gave that colt a copy of, The Catcher in the Rye.

To be honest when I saw the title this popped into my head:

He might have tried to kill Ronald Reagan!
"He's already dead."
"Oh, ok then."

Seriously, though, there's a bit of a problem here re: willing suspension of disbelief. There doesn't seem to be a practical reason NOT to teach different magic styles. Far less divisive than the 3 tribes already are. Not sure how to fix that though. Personally I'd have said that that's a more advanced lesson that he wasn't really supposed to be learning yet, but I don't know if that would mesh with what's later. Being too advanced would fall under what Pratchett called 'lies to children'.

Semi-related, Luna's philosophy grates, but I'm assuming that's the point.

Interestingly, this feels like something written around the end of Season 2.

Way back in the day, when I was young, there were different learning styles. For a time, it was almost a fad. You had visual learners, and auditory learners, and hands-on learners. But then, one day, out of the blue, that all stopped. We were all expected to learn the same way for the sake of a unified classroom. Just mentioning the old way got you frowned at, or worse.

Sameness was enforced. Left-handed kids got their asses paddled until they learned to write right-handed. None of us were special snowflakes. We were all the same, and had the same expectations. No excuses were made. It didn't last long, thankfully, but it left a hell of an impression on me. Being forced to conform to a standard warped me, in all honesty.

Oh, the left-handed things continues even now, from what I hear. Might not be as bad as it was though.


I was literally failed through 4 quarters of geometry because I wasn't getting to the right answer the way the teacher wanted, even though the answers were right.

I passed because they couldn't enforce it on the exams. B+ on the midterm and final.

When it was my turn to teach kids, it was the lesson I held to most. We are there so they learn, not so they learn one way or not at all.

Oh, crap.

Overcast is rapidly developing into what's going to be a stellar member of EIS.

Also, what better name for the middle child than the middle day?

Having a malicious Changeling as an adult supervisor must do wonders for self confidence.

Weird, we have discussions about learning styles where I teach, at least. That's college so it's more broad as students are expected to self-direct to some extent but it's there. There's conflicting data on how much those 'styles' actually matter, fwiw, but that's another story.

Not exactly my point, though. Here, from observable data the effects are both more immediate and more severe. I see now what you're going for, and knowing that makes it work better, but now it seems a little in-your-face. So it's either that or easily missed. Not sure what to do about it, though, so eh, unless you have a brainstorm I wouldn't worry about it.

Unrelated: Paddled? How long ago/where was this? In most of the US that's been effectively banned for 3 generations now, and from what I understand for nearly as long in many countries.

WRT left-handedness: both when I was in school and now that my nieces and nephews are in school, I never encountered anyone being forced to write with the 'wrong' hand. My grandfather was (which is why he wrote with a different hand than he used for sports), but that was, what, 80 years ago? Location may be playing a role here.

Edited as I realized I might have come across too critical-sounding, which wasn't the intent.

I had this problem at one point, though I didn't fail or anything. The issue there is that sometimes the alternate method of solving doesn't technically work: it does for limited circumstances but largely by coincidence. Doesn't seem like that was the case there but I've had teachers who didn't actually understand the fundamentals well enough to tell the difference. That's also a problem. Was a teacher shortage when I was growing up, and I suspect that was one of the results.

"You know, Princess Cadance is a mean pony," he said to nopony in particular. "For the Princess of Love, she's a really snotty jerk."

"What are you saying, Overcast?" asked Luna.

"Exactly what I said," he replied fearlessly. "I think the upcoming wedding might have her in a snit, but I don't know. Sometimes, she talks funny. In a weird voice. And she keeps talking to ponies that I don't recognise… funny ponies that are somehow even bigger phonies. She keeps saying that it's not time yet and she complains a lot about waiting. I just can't get over just how mean she is though. Princess Nasty has come to—"


To anyone struggling with depression, I want to encourage you to watch this video. You don't need to be familiar with Bojack

It felt as though it was tearing her apart.

...I can't resist. "You're tearing me apart Lisa!"

Again the chair tickled Luna but this time it made her grumpy. She did not wish to be tickled. Truth be told, she had no idea what she wanted, no clue as to what might make her feel better. Even the banana candies in the drawer held no appeal. Why did she like them, anyway? They didn't even taste like bananas. What they tasted like was a mystery even to her. Just what sort of pony liked mystery flavoured candies? Why did she enjoy what she did not recognise?

Obviously they taste exactly like banana candies. :P

When she saw Overcast's face in the doorway, she felt nothing. Not even surprise. Of course he was here. Just as the day before, he was sweaty, disheveled, and out of breath. He lugged his bookbag with him, and if it were any lower to the ground it would drag behind him. Also, he carried a long black case covered in peeling stickers, which struck Luna as more than a little odd because it appeared entirely too feminine. Who was she to judge? A filly entered just after him, and Luna wanted to be irked that he had not offered to allow the curly-headed girly to pass through the door first. But the wellspring of emotion had gone dry and Luna could not muster up even a vague sense of mild annoyance.

Was 'filly' meant instead of 'girly? Accidentally mixed 'filly' and 'girl'? It shows up later though so I'm not sure. If it is a typo, off to detention with it!

She wanted to praise him and toss him out of a window in equal measure.

Ah, defenestration. An appropriate response to rapscallionry, certainly?

"Well," Wednesday began, "I am Wednesday Waterkey, and I am the Invisible Filly..."

Reminds me of the first line of Ellison's "Invisible Man". I still need to read that book, but the first line shows up in quiz bowl. ...I realize that sounds kind of bad. Never fond of rote memorization but somehow that one stuck with me. And a few other famous first lines.

90% of the problem is not enough teachers. All sorts of things have been learned about child development and cognition and many wonderful teaching methods to exploit them have been developed. Unfortunately they all start to seriously break down once the ratio of students to teachers becomes greater than 10 to 1. It just becomes impossible to do the necessary personalizations. Even the exclusive private schools are usually 20 to 1 and in big city public schools 100 to 1 is not unheard of.

Curly and girly rhymed.

That's... the best excuse I have.

"No long how long a day seems to last, the sun sets eventually and even the most horrible of days will come to an end."

That first "long" seems to me that it should be a "matter"


Wednesday’s issue is in part from am miscommunication. When she said her parents told her that they didn’t have to worry about her, Wednesday took that the wrong way. I’m 90% certain they meant “You’re doing great, we don’t have reason to fear for your success” or something along those lines.

This was a gem. I saw the Lovecraft reference. All the interactions were wonderful, hysterically funny and insightful. Noticed the Changeling. She actually did Top Notch a favor. The evil holey Changelings have a lot to offer Equestria as friends... and spies. Luna's inner monologues are priceless. The constant contemplation of defenestration is a hoot.
You've got my 'like' and favorite.

I'm really enjoying this so far, every character is bursting with personality and there are some fantastic one-liners sprinkled throughout. Really looking forward to seeing where it goes.

I feel like the reason Luna won’t be at the wedding is because detention... or she might be

"Will you stop being weird?" she asked of the colt bundled up in a blanket.


Damn right, “normal” is boring

It finally dawned on me. You write Luna, like Terry Pratchett would write Eeyore.

It's like someone managed to combine the Breakfast Club and the Invasion of Canterlot in a horrible teleportation malfunction.

Delightful, isn't it?

Looking forward to the next chapter. :twilightsmile:

Enjoying the thought provoking-ness of this.

Luna... yes, you see the worst impulses and fears of ponies... but do remember that when they are dreaming, their prefrontal cortex is mostly shut down: the set of checks and balances that embodies all that we stand for; all of our higher virtuous traits that inhibit and overcome those impulses and fears is temporarily absent.

Yes, some ponies are duplicitous, treacherous, two-faced backstabbers who engage in such things as gossip and affairs in willful violation of trust - but they are not the majority; not by far. If they were, you wouldn’t have a stable society; it would escalate rapidly into rampant violence... and in the particular situation of Equestria, extinction by way of Windagos.

And as you’ve experienced yourself; it’s quite possible to have bad impulses that you’ve failed to suppress, and yet come back around to regret, repent, and atone for. It doesn’t make you a bad pony; it just makes you a pony — not an idealized caricature of one.

Yes, Kudz, it is being read. Understood, I might even dare say... :twilightsmile:

This is a very interesting read. Makes me think. So good show mate.

I'm not entirely sure about saying Luna found her way out of darkness. She was kind of smacked with weapons grade rainbow friendship and dragged back to the light.

I find myself thinking of “If you came to conquer” and how Luna reformed herself by coming all the way through madness, and had to destroy herself and forge a new reality for herself and even then there were terrible consequences.

Yes, but now that she's back in the light, she must recover. Restore trust. Learn to live with herself and what she did.

These are no easy feats and should not be dismissed.

This is great! Please continue with this story, I really like the OCs and the presentation of Luna.

I am reading, and so thoroughly enjoying the story. Your effort put into creating the story for the rest of us to enjoy is beyond appreciated.

Teeth bared in a wolfish smile, Luna materialised like a grim spectre right beside the tub, an ill-omen, a dire sign of worse fates yet to come. When she was mostly solid, she said, "We bid thee a good even, Twilight Sparkle."

I wonder how many villains have just been found inexplicably scared to death in bathtubs over the millenia.

In amused silence, Luna thought about reporting that sentence to the Redundancy Department of Redundancy.

As compared to the Department of Redundacy Department.

Or suddenly farted bubbles during Very Important Villain Meetings.

This is good. A nice, introspective, thought-provoking story.

I'm reading and enjoying it immensely! Only three more!? Aww. This is so good it could go on a long time, because I'm enjoying it so. Thank you so very much. This chapter was just amazing! I am loving Luna's internal dialogues, but at the same time feeling exceedingly sorry for her state of mind. Also the humor is just wonderful. Your portrayal of younger Twilight is dead accurate and you show her brains and mania as well as her internal strength and resolve. I will be sad when this ride is over.

Luna doesn’t need pure chance to get a villain farting bubbles. All she really needs is her own brand of callous righteousness, a conga line of evildoers entrapped in her magics, and a couple dozen warehouses full of soap.

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