• Member Since 31st May, 2018
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Solipsistic Corruptor

A chill purveyor of stories, be they smut or otherwise. A little microcosm of depravity with a heart. Now with occasional commissions!

Comments ( 40 )

So I think it's safe to say that this WON'T end be a situation where, while her turn seems fake at first, she ends up genuinely changing by the end?

Nice induction leading into the brainwashing. Can't wait to see Chrysalis start using those triggers. Something about the character being brainwashed in secret makes it extra spicy.

Well now. This should lead to some interesting outcomes. The question is whether the ponies put any contingencies in place. The problem with turncoats is that they've already shown the capacity for betrayal...

A part of me really hopes we'll see Chrysalis use an ovipositor on Twilight and possible impregnation. :twilightsmile:

Go Chryssie go! I hope it all goes well for her.

'play he cards' - her

That’s one for team Chrysalis...

Also, nice catch.


So...not going to list the fetish content in the description? Especially given the "dark" tag I really think you should.

I mean... I could, but I:
a) Have made it thus far without doing that
b) Think that telling people what fetishes are in counts as spoilers and ruins the fun
c) Use porn to advance the plot (at the pace of a snail) so having people pick and choose chapters based on their own wants of fetish can ruin the experience of the story in my opinion
d) Think it's only necessary for fetishes which are only liked/appreciated by a small minority of people (read: rape, pedophilia, scat, watersports, etc.) which are also just the fetishes I don't write, so I got meself a ticket to not do that.

Not knocking others who do or calling you dumb, mind you - I have considered it in the past and have just repeatedly said 'nah'. Your comment is appreciated. :pinkiehappy:

Also, I use 'Dark' primarily to indicate that some people might find it minorly to moderately emotionally destressing. Which also means I probably use it wrong.



You know people put spoilers on the fetishes in the description, right? The black box that you can mouse over to read?

If you acknowledge that some people will find this story emotionally distressing then you have a responsibility to warn people ahead of time HOW it will distress them. Depending on the specifics one reader's minor distress could be another reader's unwanted flashback to years of an abusive relationship.

I getcha, I just also respectfully say that if anybody reads the prologue and has doubts if they may or may not like the story or if it will cause them severe emotional destress - which is what you're describing and not what I believe my story would inflict unless we are talking some hype-specific circumstances - and continues on into the first chapter, I think they'll have plenty of time to pull up before they hit what'll hurt 'em.

If the title, the cover art, the description both short and long, the first few lines, and all the lines subsequent don't give enough warning to a person who would have a severe reaction to the rest of the work, I'm not sure putting a black box over some spoilery text will help them too incredibly much.

Wonder how far Chrysalis will actually take her revenge.
Depending on how this ends I might end up commissioning a sequel to it later down the line

Dang you work fast. I feel spoiled.


Lol I am. While it's not as laser focused on the mind control fetish as something like Friendship is Mind Control or Obedience is Magic, it's definitely a great mind control fic. I get really tired of all the crummy fics where hypnosis is just a vehicle to have a sex scene, or it feels like the commands are just going through the motions of hypnosis tropes. Chrysalis's commands are all clearly themed around control, and the porn elements are in a way also the plot elements as it's clearly all building towards her plans. I liked that she had Twilight recite everything at the end; for me that's as much the porn as the pet play (though I did really like the pet play and "cleaning" too; the fact that Chrysalis is using all this to reinforce control over Twilight makes it all great).

I call it 'sensible sexy', where the sexy and the plot aren't two entities that shall never meet.

And yes, I do agree that thematically important hypnosis is just as important as making the scenes hot. Sure, there's room for just having sexy fun off of the back of hypnosis/mind control, but being able to write something that has the hypnosis and commands given during hypnosis be very much a vehicle for the story to progress is also very nice.

I'm also glad you liked the recital Twilight had. It was fun trying to come up with all the lessons she had to that point without actually having the scenes to go back to - honestly wouldn't mind writing them out at some point, but it might be a bit... gratuitous to go back to just write them out once this fic is done just for the sake of a few extra sexy scenes.

"I..." Twilight hesitated, taking a deep breath, "I trust you, Chrysalis." She said finally, making the changeling's heart jump in excitement. "Do what you can to help me to relax. And... and I'm glad that you've been so concerned about me and willing to help me in this. It shows real growth that I'm sure will only continue in the future." Chrysalis lowered her head in a grateful, nodding bow.

This irritates the hell out of me, but the mind control is hot. Nothing wrong with your writing btw; I just have a conflicted relationship with bad ends (emotionally distressful, but very hot).

"Well first, I need you to stop analyzing everything. It will make it much harder, if not impossible. Over analyzing each thing that happens will keep your brain awake when we want it to go into a state of lowered activity." Chrysalis said. "Next, I think the best place to do this is with you laying on your bed. A relaxed position for your body will help with the process."

If this becomes a brain drain story that'll be a nice surprise. For some reason that's rather rare on this site.

"Under your hooves, my Queen." Twilight said, not waiting an instant to give the answer that had been drilled into her with intense training. Chrysalis slowly nodded to this, smiling in satisfaction as she looked over her prize.

I wanted to comment with a picture, but since there seems to be only 1 relevant Chrysalis picture: 2379435 on Derpi (Suggestive). Pretend it's Twilight I guess. This is only the 2nd or 3rd time I encountered it for some reason.

"Very good, but there is more to it." Chrysalis said with a dainty smile that belied the storm of passion restrained within her. "This changes will take over you whenever it so pleases anypony that knows the key phrase. And indeed, there is a phrase which brings about this change. If ever any creature speaks it, you will instantly act as a dog would, and believe with every fiber of your being that you are one.

Now I imagine Twilight doing some science experiment, then Chrysalis suddenly making her IQ drop like a rock.

Also would Chrysalis go further eventually and just have Twilight start licking urinals?

Or later give Twilight conflicting lessons just to break her mind at specific situations. I wonder does Shining still have some triggers?

Since Twilight still thinks it's Celestia, it would be hilarious if Chrysalis ends up screwed over later because of it and ends up also worshipping Celestia.

Though that would be an awkward/sexy scenario involving Celestia, she would not only have to know Twilight’s triggers to bring out those lessons, but would also have to have Chrysalis to say them. The only public access one is the petplay one.
That being said, it is a delicious idea for a different story.

Is she going to transform Twilight into a Changeling?


Good chapter. Though I'm rather confused about what a changelings 3rd ability is.

And Another. This is how an infiltrator is supposed to act. All Hail The Queen!

And this is what happens when chrysalis is written well. She wins. I for one welcome our new changeling over lords.

Glad you enjoyed it! Though I do feel that Chrysalis can only win when she puts aside her pride. She’s like a Greek hero in that hubris is her major flaw in many ways. But strip away that pride and you get an infiltration master.

Exactly as I hoped it will be. Really enjoyed it. Thanks again :)

The warning made thought it was going to be much darker than it actually was. :derpytongue2:

Then again, for Chrysalis bad end fics I usually compare them to "Egg sacks", so there's that. Do you have a link to the "Twinkle, Twinkle Dying Star" chapter?

Chrysalis looked on it with pride - the heart of a new hive. It thrummed with the beat of life, filled with the many eggs that would grow into full hatchlings. Soon, oh so soon, there'd be true changelings in the world again. It filled Chrysalis with such hope and pride that she could hardly take it. Her people were recovering, despite all the damage that had been done.

I'm just picturing competition with the reformedlings now. For some reason that's almost never explored; the world is large; I'm sure it can fit multiple hives, not just exclusively reformed or exclusively old versions.

An interesting concept that might get explored at some point.

For a second I was worried that when I saw this update, it'd interfere with the sequel, but since it fits with the epilogue, I can still commission it just fine.

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