Hi there. This are not a attack on you or your story. But why for the love of Celestia a watertalisman? It is like half, or a third of the stories out there is about them. Why is it never the power generator that fails? Or the food source?

... Okay I am sorry about that, but I do just see so many stories about them. And it is not because the idea isn´t good, or Fallout 1 that it is from is a bad game, but when all are doing the same is it getting a little repetitive.

Besides that on a more happy note. Welcome to the Fo:E heard. Look at our wiki for most of your lore need, and g-doc if you want to talk to others that are in the world of Fo:E

PS. That down vote isn´t mine. There is some haters out there that are after the Fo:E world, so don´t look at the red line unless there is a comment that says why they voted down

Like Doomande said, ignore the haters unless they actually say why they downvoted you. We all get them.
Feel free to ask any of us if you have questions, concerns, or just want to bounce some ideas around. We're not as scary as we look, and jolly cooperation helps us all improve.

I didn't notice any errors at all, surprisingly. Do you have an editor or prereader yet?
To be honest, I was hoping that Socket would go with Whisper. The wasteland is no place for a lone pony, after all. Especially one from a Stable.
Maybe describe Whisper a little in the next chapter, give us a better idea of what she looks like. I'm curious what her cutie mark looks like, as well.

Keep up the good work!

1319302 It's a perfectly reasonable way to start a story. A little cliche, sure, but I just pass it off as water talismans being naturally fragile or unreliable.
Then again, I've got a lot of experience working with machinery that wouldn't look out of place in a Stable. Any kind of filter has a limited lifespan, and will break or degrade beyond usability sooner or later, as I well know.

1319302 The water talisman problems are a reference (mostly) to Fallout 2, in which the original Vault Dweller is sent to recover a new water chip after Vault 13's only water chip breaks. Hope this helps!

1319397
Again. I am sorry if I sounded mad or negative in any way. I have just seen it one to many times in the last few days, and it is not fair of me to give any feedback that could be interpreted as negative. I have not read the story yet, so all what I have to judge from is the description.

But! How is it that Stables is breaking down so easily? They was not build to house funny experiments rather than save lives, like the Vaults in Fallout. That is one of the things that I fell in love with when I read Fo:E for the first time. That they actually tried to build a save home for the future, and not just earn some money on a war.
The Stables, by my head cannon that could be wrong, was build to last for the future. Stable-tec had also some few Stables where the social experiment was to break down and try to bring the ponies together that way, Stable-tec tried all they could to make a brighter future for all, and find a way to end the hatred and future war over resurces. So why hurt that dream by not put enough spare parts in the box?

1319463
Nope it is a GECK in fallout 2

1319528 It's the usual thing in the story. Water talisman breaks, pony goes out to find a new one. But then, I read fics for the characters and the journey, and Oasis has a fair bit of potential in both regards.

Easy to explain why Stables are always breaking, and why it's normally the Water Talisman that does so.
They've been operating for 200 years, give or take. That's a long time for anything to run, especially machinery/magic thingies that should really be replaced/recharged/repaired every few years.
From personal experience, you need to swap out vital components for maintenance etc at least every couple of years or risk major breakdowns and damage.

As for why there never seems to be spare parts... Water Talismans would be, by my guess, very expensive/difficult to manufacture, and probably hadn't been tested for hundreds of years' continuous use. It's one thing to say "It'll be fine, we're sure it'll work." and another to actually put it through that wear-and-tear. The builders may have just assumed the things would be up to the task, and not stocked any more of the highly valuable devices than was strictly needed.

Also, logistical snafus. Take it from someone who has spent weeks chasing down parts that were, quite literally, sitting on a shelf in storage: Some bonehead somewhere down the line will inevitably mess up their paperwork, sending a box of spare parts to the wrong location, and shipping you a large crate of reverse-thread bolts when you really need a large turbine blade. Yes, that happened. No, we never found out who did it.

1319528 Oh, I've never played it, I was just going off what I read on the wiki

I don't have an editor/proofreader, but I'm pretty OCD is that department already, and I sort of have a beta too.

Socket might end up out in the wastes with Whisper eventually, but I'm honestly not sure yet. (Whisper was pretty much sent out to die, anyway.) I took the water talisman track because of Fallout 1, mostly. Might be a bit overplayed, but it works as a McGuffin object to get the main character out of the Stable, and an excuse on the Overmare's part to get rid of her.

Thanks for the comments all.

1319613
Nice to see one with that kind of knowledge helping with the Fo:E world, it's rather fun what kind of specialist we have on "our" side

As I said, it was my head cannon and I bow my head humbly to you since you know what you talk about. Would just explain why I said what I said. And stuff like the reverse-thread bolts instead of a turbine blade is something I have head of before, with my step dad working with a small metal/tool company here in Denmark

1319976
True as a McGuffin does it work perfectly, and I can not say it to many times, it was not a attack on you or your story before. I am going to read it here in the coming week and will give a little review of it, so I bring some constructive words to it now that I have made some critique. And I hope that it will balance it out

Oh no, I'm not taking it as any sort of attack - and it's valid criticism; though I'm not all that well versed in Fo:E fics outside of Fo:E, Project Horizons and one or two other ones I've read.

I look forward to the commentary.

1320174 I've actually based a surprising amount of Wasteland Bouquet on things I've done in real life.

1320197 I look forward to seeing how Whisper deals with the wasteland, alone or with friends.
You should have a look at some of the other FoE fics, if only because there are so many good ones out there.
It's also useful for inspiration, and you can have a lot of fun hiding references to them in your own fic.

1323562 I've read most of Pink Eyes, New Beginnings, Guise of Chaos, some of Murky Number Seven and couple others I can't remember the titles to off the top of my head.
Sadly, I don't have a lot of time to read for fun at the moment. If I'm not studying or writing for class, I'm reading a textbook or literary novel (and blegh to that) for a class or trying to hash out some of my own prose.
I do plan on sneaking references into my story though - but I really haven't planned that far ahead yet.

1323617 Those are all good choices.
Remember, if you have questions about anything in-universe, out of it, or just want someone to bounce ideas off of, check the board or send one of us a message.

Together, we can make a better wasteland.

Love this story so far really well done however if I was to complain about something its that you don't really describe the physical appearance of the characters however you did good describing the personality of whisper talking about her antics and mayhem she causes

I hope you continue this story

Here it comes. Around 8 weeks or so to late and forgotten, found and lost again... REVIEW TIME! And I must say, I am really sorry that I forgot your story until now, because that are not the normal me, but lets see if I can´t make up for it with some feedback right

I must say that I love your first paragraph of the story. I know that it does not sound so important, but personal starts like that are one of the best ways to catch the reader. With only 2 sentences did you show that you have an interesting mare as the main character, and the first chapter is the most important to catch readers, and you did that with the first segment.

Something I noticed rather fast was how many sections you have split your chapter into, and I must say that it is nice to see. Way to many other Fo:E stories think that they have to use as few as they can, but the way you use them make the story easy to read, and helped at least me holding the concentration throughout the chapter without no real breaks beside writing down a keyword or two here in my review. I really hope that it is a thing that will return, because it was lovely to see and read like that.

I have already commented on the water talisman once, so I will jump over that point in a sleek way... Just like that.

I am not going to talk about Whisper or any of the other characters yet because I want to know them more. But I must say that it is a nice way that you describe them, showing small parts of the world that reflects some characteristics from them instead of saying it out loud like some others are doing. Oh and your characters are looking good so far, it is going to be interesting how Whisper reacts the first time she sees a shop or a city, and can´t wait to see how she is going to make some pranks on both steel rangers and raiders

I must say that your wording and teller style throughout the chapter are interesting, personal, yet informative in so many ways. And I really liked it. The only thing I can put my finger on is that you jumped into present tense some times, not many, but something that I noticed, and that is really sad since the rest of the story was so good.

Nitpicks:
Remember to make a F+Crtl search after double spaces, there was 2 that have sneaked them self into your chapter here, and it are a easy way to find and kill them

"Not only did I have a shadow that would pounce on me if I so much as looked over long at one of the grates" Are there not missing a word here, or one to many?

1868541 Thanks for the feedback. Chapter one definitely did not get put through the editing grinder the way chapter two did. Also, unfamiliar form (first-person) etc etc excuses and whatnot.