(15) Bad Dreams
Out of all the things I expected to happen, the very last on the list was me opening my eyes in Equestria again.
I had to blink the confusion away as I took in my surroundings. We- Twilight and I- were once again in the Archives of the Royal Library, completely alone except for a few guards. Twilight turned to me and stared at me with wide eyes like I was the last thing she expected to see. I didn’t blame her though. I was the last thing I expected to see, too.
“What am I still doing here?” I asked, mostly to myself. “I should’ve… I don’t know. Faded out of existence? There’s no way I should still be here. Did they not resolve their issues?”
“I don’t know,” Twilight responded, just as confused, maybe a hint of worry in her voice. “I gave Celestia the coordinates to Princess Amore’s pieces, and Cadance… well, she seemed like she was coming around by the time you undid the spell. Maybe something happened between then and now?”
“That has to be the case, because I shouldn’t be here,” I said with certainty. Even as I said it, I felt weird. Not different physically or mentally. I was still both Sombra and myself at the same time, and still had my longer, shaggier looking coat after almost two years of complete nonsense. Emotionally though, I felt… different, and I couldn’t really say how. Maybe less angry and upset? More satisfied? I couldn’t quite describe the feeling, but it was a nicer one than I normally had.
“Let’s get to looking to see what happened,” I suggested. “Get us to the castle?”
Twilight didn’t argue, quickly lighting up her horn and taking us to the castle. It looked just as normal as ever, although eerily empty of many ponies. There were more guards and things, which I figured was something. And this feeling…
“Do you feel different, Twilight?” I asked. “I feel different,” I said, “and I don’t know what it is.”
“Yes, I do… but I don’t know what it is either,” she told me. “I don’t know… I still remember everything that happened and why we went into the past, but…”
“But we also have fragments of something else,” I finished for her. “And I’m not sure how I feel about it.”
Granted, the fragments weren’t bad. In fact, they were kind of nice, mostly happy things, but of what I couldn’t really remember. I still remembered though Cadance’s trial, and Celestia’s anger, and the near death at the hands of these ponies at the start of my existence, but those things felt less real somehow. Just a few minutes ago, I was thinking about them, but now they almost seemed more like bad dreams than anything else. It was something both real and unreal at the same time, and it was almost disorienting.
“Did something like this happen when you time traveled?” I asked, looking around the empty throne room. “And where would they all be? Am I still the ruler somehow? What happened?”
“Nothing like this happened with me either time,” Twilight explained. “But then again, basically nothing changed the first time and we made sure that nothing changed the second time. The times things did, I was too much in a rush to have time to think about it.”
I sighed at that and closed my eyes to examine myself. I still felt like me, that much was clear. I was still around, though I didn’t know how. There was no good reason for me to be here. And yet, here I was, wondering why. The second we went into the past to tell Cadance to deal with her emotions, that should’ve prevented this from happening. So was Cadance still behind all this? Was she still planning something?
This time, I lit up my horn, wordlessly taking the two of us to where I knew Cadance’s room was. Even despite my still being here, I was surprised to see her here, too. She was smiling brightly when we came in, talking to Shining Armor about something. She turned to see us pop in, and continued to smile as she waved at us, at me in particular. She looked at me like we were good friends.
“Hi, Alex,” she said. “Hey, Twilight. Back from the archives already?”
I could still feel the fact that I was upset with her, that much didn’t change. But it wasn’t the absolute hate and bitterness I had before, which was weird to me. I once again got the feeling that a lot of what I remembered about her was just a dream. I still remembered her greeting me in my secret room in the Crystal Empire though. That still felt real, even if everything after was up in the air.
“What happened?” I asked her, no edge in my voice at all, which surprised me somehow. “Why am I still here?” I asked. “I shouldn’t exist here at all. Twilight and I should’ve fixed all of this.”
I couldn’t say I was angry though as much as I was disappointed. Not even that really. Maybe hurt? That was probably the closest word to what I was feeling, but even that didn’t feel right to say.
Cadance looked down at her hooves, giving away the fact that she was the reason I was here right now. “I- you told me when I had Sombra use that spell that you didn’t want to be here, but I didn’t know that. I honestly thought you were only doing it because of who you said I would become in the future, so I… well, I wanted to have you come back so I could-”
“How did you know to go to Sombra to get that done?” I interrupted. “There was no way you could’ve known on your own, was there?”
“Celestia asked Twilight how you could be from the future and what was going on with you, and she told me about… about what I was going to do…” She looked away shamefully before continuing, “And I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I did to you, and I had to bring you back to tell you that.”
“But why?” I asked. Not bitterly, not disappointed, not angry. I only had a simple want to know in my voice. I almost felt like I sounded like a little kid asking when his bedtime was.
“Well, before Twilight left, she was telling me something about what would happen to you, and- and as selfish as it is, I couldn’t bring myself to let that happen to you. I couldn't… I couldn’t be responsible for killing somepony… I’m sorry.”
I had to cringe at that thought. I wouldn’t call it suicide since I was just a personality or tulpa of somepony else, but that really was what it would’ve been. It was what I wanted since it was the best I could hope for to happen, but this feeling, this weird feeling I had… it was nice, better than anything I’d felt in my two years thus far being here. I almost wanted to thank her for doing this, and felt like I had before. I stopped myself though. I wanted to see how this would play out with everypony before I got into all of that.
“But I also wanted to say thank you,” she continued, nearly taking me by surprise with her words. “I have to thank you for getting me straight. My mindset back then was not okay. I mean, it’s… it’s still not great, but I’m not where I was before, and I have to thank you for that. I don’t know what I would be doing right now without you… well, I do, apparently, because you told me.”
“You’re welcome,” I couldn’t help but respond shyly, smiling a little bit for a second before looking away. “It still hurts that you did this to me though…”
“I know, and nothing I do will ever take that back, and I know it’s not ever going to be enough, but I’m sorry for all of this. I hope though that I can be better than whatever pony you knew that looked like me, that you both knew,” she said, looking to Twilight to apologize to her, too.
“I forgive you,” Twilight said to her, giving her a sad smile. “I do hope we can move past this though,” she added, sending a look my way, seeing what I had to say.
I wanted to say I was bitter and angry at her, but couldn’t muster up any of those feelings. The most I could do was say I was sad and disappointed, but even that wasn’t very much. I felt… happier maybe? Regretful, but not so much that it was making me depressed like before. The best way to describe it was ‘normal’, which was something I couldn’t say I ever really felt before since I got here.
I wanted to ask what she did to get me back here, but I found myself already remembering the scene somehow. She came into my study in the Crystal Empire, promising that I would inherit the country, and then I was following her instructions and casting the spell on myself. Then Twilight was in front of me and I was existing, and she called Cadance into the room, still the same as before. However, when Cadance came in, she was on her knees apologizing to me and explaining the situation, one I didn’t believe at the time. Somehow, even now, I was almost starting to not believe it, except I remembered just a second ago talking to Celestia about all of this, and seeing Cadance steal Celestia’s and Luna’s magic just an hour ago.
“This is disorienting, Twilight,” I mumbled, having to sit down.
“You’re telling me that,” she replied, doing the same thing. “I’ve never experienced anything like this. I feel like my memories are conflicting.”
“Exactly the same for me… where’s Hope?” I asked. “Is she still here?”
“Huh? Oh, no, she’s in the Crystal Empire with Princess Amore, remember?”
I did remember. That was where I lived while she ruled. I mostly stayed out of sight while I tried to repair relationships there. But that didn’t make sense because I lived here, where I ruled over Equestria alongside her. But I didn’t because Twilight and Cadance and Shining took care of that in Celestia’s retirement. But Celestia was banished, and…
“This is going to take some time to work through,” I told her. Then, something occurred to me and I suddenly closed my eyes, making sure I could still remember it.
I thought back to my life on Earth, and I sighed in relief, happy that even though I was taken away from that place, the memories were still fresh and clear. Even being here when I didn’t expect to be, I at least could say I was still myself. That was the most important thing to me. If I wasn’t me, then this would be the very worst possible, but as of now, it seemed like this might have been shaping up to be better than I expected, even if this wasn’t what I wanted to happen.
“You know, Celestia said she wanted to have tea with Shining Armor and I today,” Cadance said. “Did you both want to come with us?”
Even with my different memories inserting themselves into my mind, I was still extremely reluctant to see her. Even if things were different, I wouldn’t expect her to be any less emotional than she was before. I was still worried even now that I would walk in there and she would take out her anger and frustration on me.
But then I was thinking about all the times I had tea with her, when she was kind to me and smiling at me and I was telling her that she was my favorite pony in the whole show. She’d been nothing but nice to me ever since I’d gotten here. What did I have to be afraid of?
“I… yes,” I decided. “I’ll go and see her. But I want you there to protect me, Twilight, in case things turn sour.”
“I’ll be there, but… I can’t believe I was about to ask why you would want that. I somehow almost forgot what happened.”
“It’s all seeming like it was just a bad dream to me,” I said. “But let's go now while we can. I want to get back to the Crystal Empire to spend time with Hope later. And I want to write this all down, too, so I don't forget it.” Even if it all was seeming like a bad dream, there was no way I wanted to forget any of this. I wasn't going to let this be lost to history, even if things felt better than they were before.
“Oh, hello Alex!” Celestia called cheerily as Cadance, Shining, Twilight and I all teleported into her room. The first three were smiling, but Twilight and I both held back. I couldn’t help but be wary of her, and kept my distance from her, watching her carefully, making sure she didn’t attack. At the same time, I felt the urge to smile come upon me, almost like I was meeting an old friend. It was a strange sensation.
“It’s been a bit since we’ve had tea together,” she said, Cadance and Shining Armor already moving to sit down, I following behind Twilight, making sure I stayed close to her. “Black tea is your favorite, correct?” she asked me. “If we had coffee, I’d offer you a cup of that, without cream of course. I always forget that you only take sugar in it.”
“Um, sure, I’ll take that,” I decided. I’d never had black tea, but I guessed it was as good a time as any to test the validity of our time travel. If I liked it, then it meant that Celestia and Cadance both really had changed. I didn’t want to just listen to my memories, as foggy and conflicting as they seemed to be. The tea would be the test, I decided.
“You look nervous, Alex,” the white alicorn started, raising an eyebrow as she took a sip of tea. “Is something the matter?”
“Um, the two of them just… they just got back from the archives…” Cadance said, seeming a bit ashamed. Her ears flattened against her head as she said it.
Celestia, too, had some shame in her eyes, but didn’t show much more than that in her expression. “I apologize for the perception you still have of me,” she started quietly. I almost began to counter, expecting that to be all she was going to say before she continued, “I also apologize for the actions that I would have taken had you not intervened. I like to believe I would have never fallen so far. However, seeing the look on both your face and Twilight’s, I’m sad to say that what you told me years ago is true. I’d like to repair our relationship, however, if you believe it’s possible to do.”
I couldn’t help but smile at that. Of all ponies, the Princess of Equestria was asking me to repair our friendship. It was almost comical, given all that had happened. This was something straight out of a story book, it seemed. Except it was real life somehow.
“Well how can I possibly decline that?” I asked. “You’re Princess Celestia after all. How can I say no to you?” She smiled at that, too, and I sighed and closed my eyes. “I forgive you,” I told her, “but it’s going to be a lot of work for me to… be in the mindset that you’re not who I remember seeing.”
Not that witch who hated me with her whole being, who turned into Daybreaker because she hated me so much. But I thought I could try, anyway. I felt lighter right now, like things were better somehow, even if my memories were kind of scattered, even if I knew how these ponies were. Right now, though, it felt like I hopped into a bad iteration of Equestria, and I was just now seeing the right one for the very first time. There might be a tiny little bit of something to be had here, I guessed. It might be worth it to see what this place was like rather than fade out of existence like I wanted to.
We made small talk, the five of us talking about whatever came to mind. Our day, what everyone had been up to, the kinds of ponies we met recently, the bad food at restaurants we ate. It was absolutely wonderful and normal and surreal and casual all at the same time. If you told me when I got here that this would've been happening, I wouldn't have believed you, it was so crazy to me.
“This is so strange. It’s so normal and unreal at the same time. There’s no way this can be real life. Celestia and Cadance aren’t the kind of ponies to be kind like this. And yet…”
And yet it seemed like I’d known these two for years, like they were almost good friends. It was strange, but there was also a sense of rightness and normalcy, like this was the way it was supposed to be because it was the way it had always been. I guessed I would take it, but it would be weird trying to get used to it after everything.
“Anyway,” I started again, “you said you had some black tea for me to drink? I was told it was my favorite.”
Celestia giggled at that and poured me a cup, sending it my way. I took a small sip of it and smiled. It was the best tea I ever tasted.
All of what happened between us couldn’t be chalked up to a bad dream, and never would be, not after all that happened, but it sure did feel like one. Maybe this was the part where I woke up and saw the real Equestria. After all, the tea tasted amazing, and surely the tea wouldn't lie to me, would it? It was my favorite, after all.
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Still can't believe the story of Alex went on for almost two years, with the guy suffering so much, and then to finally get a perfectly happy ending like this...
Though I, like many longtime readers of this story and its predecessor, obviously did not agree with every direction it took, the overall quality of the story is most definitely good in my eyes and I appreciate all the effort you put into it. Thank you so much for this ride, may Alex's tale live on!
The ending is pleasing. Not too many get a happy one, and our boy deserved one most assuredly. Live in peace Alex, yours was a wonderful tale.
Full-blown butterfly effect there. Good thing it did not lead to bad ending.
Wait, does this mean Alex might really have a shot with Fluttershy in this new timeline?
Aha! A good ending, one I suspected was coming!
I... don't really have much to say on the matter. The ending was highly satisfying. There doesn't need to be any great cliff hanger or dramatic scene. Just... a path to normalcy. Alex being able to find a place in Equestria is the ending he deserves after all the bullshit he dealt with.
Overall, very good story.
I hate it. I don't understand how anyone could consider Alex being forced to be Sombra or coexist with him a good ending, especially when those involved deliberately brought him into being knowing he would suffer.
Frankly the only way it could actually have a happy ending is for either Alex or Sombra to be erased.
This has been a awesome story
meh
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look at this funny cat
i.ibb.co/vzKWmKh/027-D5-A1-E-8896-4-A32-8787-E7-CF9-FE755-AB.jpg
All I can say is: bravo! That was a great read
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Their memories were altered when they came back, their "new" selves still existed and their old selves had to go somewhere since they didn't poof into nonexistence. And since there "new" selves actually happened and their old selves no longer happened, the body and memories of the new selves are dominant. The memories and experiences are still there, just overwritten. I wouldnt call this a happy ending either.
I don't know if you meant it this way. But the way this is worded gives the feeling a sequel is in the works at some point.
This story was a wild ride, but definitely one that I'm glad I took. I had a few problems with it and I'm not so sure that I liked the ending but overall I had a lot of fun reading I Am Not Sombra and this sequel!
I would like more on Amore, Hope, and Sombra.
So, will there be a third story after this. Where we get to see Alex settle into the ‘real’ Equestria as he calls it?
I got to the end and didn't realize it was the end the story was amazing
This was quite the ride, and I'm glad I was here for it. I will admit that I don't really understand how it happened though? Either Twilight and Sombra went and overwrote their own minds with the memories of the two time travelers, or Cadence tricked Sombra into creating Alex again? Both of these only explain one of the two knowing what happened though.
I don't get it, but it's a nice ending regardless.
This story was a good read though I'm not sure if Sombra and Alex became a single individual or the former got erased in the end of everything.
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I think it's a matter of the lesser of the evils that could have been:
• Paradox theory would've just doomed an entire timeline. If Cadence never went psycho, everything else including his creation wouldn't have either, thus he wouldn't have time traveled, etc. Basically mass genocide.
• Causality would've changed nothing and the only (reasonable) course of action would've been to kill Cadence and be labeled a monster anyway.
• Memories/ versions of some ponies would've been overlapping/ overwriting each other. A similar example of this that comes to mind is Red Vs Blue season 16 or 17 and how one character had memories from two completely different time lines.
• Or creates a new timeline that "corrects itself" from the original.
This ending seems like a mix between 3 and 4. Frankly, I'd choose either of those over the first two that basically accomplish nothing.
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The reason I think it's bad is because it feels like giving up, treating this result like a happily ever after when Alex and Sombra were both willing to start killing people to prevent Alex from existing. Both of them and Twilight have memories from both timelines, so they should all be fully aware Cadance deliberately betrays them and does the one thing she was told not to. Cadance creates Alex, giving him a life and then ruining it for the selfish purpose of making herself feel better. Even worse is that she appears to have gotten away with it, which says ponies of the new timeline either allowed or endorsed it.
Why I say a happy ending would be getting rid of either Alex or Sombra is because it would mean Alex isn't forced to share a mind and identity with the person who ruined his life.
A nice ending to the story.
That "lets" needs an apostrophe: "let's"
This might sound more like they ate at the restaurants and not like they ate the restaurants if you wrote it like this: "the bad food we ate at restaurants"
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I'd say it's closer to the ending to a psychological horror I read once then a true "happily ever after." The Alex/Sombra and Twilight we know are pretty much dead, a memory so faded it's more of a dream to them, suppressed by these "new" versions of themselves and whatever experiences they had that are different then from what we know.
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I also found the ending unsatisfying.
She had sombra cast the spell on himself in the new timeline with her already knowing what would result which seems even worse than when they did it the first time as this time she knew exactly what it would do to sombra and still had him cast the spell anyway.
Sombra before that point had his own mind which she had him destroy/fracture/split solely to recreate a personality that would be upset about being ripped away from a life that never was just so she could apologize.
This also denies hope from getting the sombra she knew back.
For cadance to have sombra do that it doesn't seem like she has learned anything at all, if anything she seems even more of a monster.
Quick scenario we know that in the future pony A being killed in an accident results in pony B being created who is a pretty OK pony.
But now we know the future so the accident won't happen.
Do you make sure the accident happens anyway (now it's murder)?
The story somehow comes to the conclusion that yes, that's exactly what you do, you murder pony A and then somehow passes that off as a good ending.
I don't know what would have been a good ending but this doesn't feel like a good ending.
Best I can come up with is hope and sombra reunited, amore restored and them all living normally visiting a memorial to alex. I think that would have been the best possible ending with the constraints given since alex can't go back since he and his home never actually existed in the first place.
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that.
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and that.
To be honest I constantly was expecting for Alex to see glitches in reality,like an illusion
And it all turns out to be fake or something
I found the ending so boring that I just skipped to the last chapter of the story. I find that Alex should of woke up in bed or died when they came back from the future. You force Alex to be fine with being stuck in Equestria without taking his rage into account even if it was made to feel like it was a bad dream. A bad dream can really miss you up and you did nothing story wise to fix his want for it to end but made him come back so you can have a flimsy at best happy ending.
Eh might skip on this. The first story had an interesting premise and all, but once again the weird characterization and plot holes just didn't sit right with me. Again, Sombra creating a completely new personality with a fleshed out world which includes Equestria as a show with details he would have zero way of knowing (and I know the whole excuse being used to explain away Starlight, but that wouldn't explain the countless other details such as the mirror human world or all the stuff side-characters got up to) just makes zero sense. And so far it doesn't seem like this sequel does anything to really explain or justify the oddness of the first story. :\
But, what if this was in fact the dream?
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Agreed
Time travel and cadance plotline ruin everything
What's about reforming cozy glow?
Brimestone?
The drama triangle with hope and fluttershy?
So many interesting things in the beginning of this story got throw away.
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I will concede to that.
One of the best.