• Published 2nd Sep 2012
  • 21,776 Views, 762 Comments

Discord's Heir - Forum Explorer



Discord figures out a way to free himself from his prison. Retirement. Now he just needs a heir.

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Chapter 3.Pinkie

Pinkie Pie bounced, and bounced, and bounced, and bounced. As she went she laughed, sang and chased after fauna. Finally she stopped and collapsed to the ground. “I'm so bored!” She wailed, “I mean sure it was fun seeing all the new critters and new flowers, which are really tasty by the way I can't wait to make some flower flavoured cupcakes, but there's nopony around to share it all with!” Pinkie Pie took a deep breath, “IS THERE ANYPONY THERE? HEEEEELLLLLOOOOO?” Pinkie gasped and inhaled rapidly. To her disappointment only bird calls answered her. Pinkie sighed and kept walking forward, she didn't know where she was going but there was nopony around here so there was no reason to stay. Hopefully she'd find somepony if she just kept moving.

“Just keep moving, just keep moving, just keep moving moving moving.” Pinkie sang as she walked along, “Just keep walking, just keep walking, just keep walking walking walking.” Her pace increased and Pinkie started to bounce as she sang, “Just keep bouncing, just keep bouncing, just keep bouncing bouncing bouncing, I love to bounce, Oh bouncing -AH!” The ground under Pinkie suddenly collapsed dropping Pinkie down a deep hole and trapping her at the bottom.

“That was pretty fun! But how am I going to get out now? Also who just digs a hole in the middle of a jungle? Wait! If somepony dug this hole then they must be around here somewhere. And they'll check this hole and I can meet them and be their friend! And I'll finally have somepony to talk to! Afterall who just digs a hole in the middle of nowhere? Moles do! But this hole is too big to be dug by moles so clearly they must be giant doom moles from the Sun! Who think they can dig their way to the moon and take it over for the glory of the great Molish Empire! Wait, but this hole doesn't go anywhere. Hmm... that must mean that it's a trap to catch ponies. But why do the moles want to catch ponies? Because they eat ponies of course! Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no! I don't want to get eaten up in a big stew with turnips, potatoes, and tomatoes! I've got to climb out of this hole.” With that Pinkie threw herself at the steep walls of the hole, trying frantically to climb her way up through sheer force. She actually managed to get a few feet up but with a small cry and bounce she fell back to the bottom.

“Stupid mole hole! I'll beat you yet! Hyaah!” Pinkie bounced up and scrabbled at the walls with her hooves as she slowly fell back down again. She slid all the way back down and fell on her rump. “Stupid hole!” She exclaimed before punching the wall with her hoof. “Ow!”

“Heyrðir þú eitthvað?” A voice suddenly said.

“Það kom frá gildrunni.” Another voice replied.

“Hey, listen! I'm over here, trapped in a hole made by moles! Come help me.” Pinkie called. A few moments later a long knotted rope dropped down.

"Gríptu í." One of the voices yelled. Pinkie grabbed the rope with her mouth and they started to pull her out of the hole. When she got out there were two small boars staring her in the face. One had black fur and the other had brown, both were only about the size of Applebloom and had long tusks jutting out from their mouths.

“Thanks for saving me. I'm so happy. Happy! Happy! Happy! Happy! Happy! Happy!” Pinkie Pie sang as she bounced around the two boars. They looked at each other and shrugged. Before they could do anything else Pinkie grabbed the two of them and gave them both a massive hug. While carrying both of them she spun and danced around before finally releasing them sending them spinning to the ground. “Whoo that was so much fun! What are you names anyways?”

“Hvað? Mér svimar.” The black furred boar muttered before standing back up.

“Huh? I can't understand you at all. But that's all right because the universal language of the world is parties! I'm sure we'll get along great and we'll be great friends even though we can't understand a word we are saying to each other. Just like me and Twilight!”

“Komdu, við skulum fara aftur til þorpsins.” The brown boar said to the black boar. The gestured for Pinkie to follow them and the trio set off through the jungle. The two boars' low stature allowed them to slip through the dense underbrush while Pinkie merely bounced through it as before. They walked for the rest of the day before they finally reached the boars' home. Pinkie actually smelt it before she could see it, the familiar smell of baking filled the air and Pinkie propelled herself forward in response. Her sudden acceleration startled her guides who raced after Pinkie as she practically rocketed towards the village.

When they caught up with her they found her bouncing around the village excitedly babbling on to every boar she came across, even though none of the villagers could understand her. The village itself was rather small and circular. The inner ring of buildings were houses with the outer ring containing storage areas and various workplaces as well as the market. A large dome could be seen on the outskirts of town as well. Of course the most important boar had a home in the direct centre of the village, which doubled as a sort of town hall. Pinkie, of course, was quickly drawing a crowd as she barged into the boars' homes and sang to the entire village.

“Hvað eigum við að gera?” The brown boar asked the black boar.

“Náum í höfðingjann” The black boar replied. The brown boar ran off into the large building at the centre of the village. Meanwhile the other boar did it's best to intercept Pinkie and keep her calm. To no avail. Despite his efforts she managed to hijack a family of boars and directed them to cooking while she started stringing balloons up on random areas of the village. The crowd watched mesmerized as she barked out orders in an incomprehensible language and continued to decorate everything in sight. Finally a huge old grey boar emerged from the centre building. A hush fell over the crowd with even Pinkie stopping for a second before rushing up to him.

“Wow you must be the head honcho around here! You're so much bigger and oooh, look how big those tusks are!” Pinkie said poking said tusks with a hoof. “It's like your the boar version of Princess Celestia but you don't have a glowing pretty mane that sparkles and dances. But I bet you have the same love of cake! Just wait til I finish getting this party started and you'll taste cake like you've never tasted before!”

The elderly boar just ignored her and faced the crowd. "Fólk, Ljáið mér eyra, því ég færi ykkur fórn þessa árs!" He bellowed pointing a hoof at Pinkie. The entire village erupted into cheers as a result and the boars suddenly exploded into motion. They ran around pulling out large tables and set up torches around the village. Others joined the first family in cooking while others began to bring out crude plates of wood while more still filled the streets with ribbons and pulled out drums to play music with. Pinkie watched the proceedings for a few moments before turning to the elderly boar.

“You're throwing me a party! I just knew we'd get along perfectly! Now what can I do to help?” Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing in place. The boars ignored her and continued their work. Before Pinkie could dash off again three elderly sows approached her. They said something incomprehensible to Pinkie who just stared at them blankly, smiled, and fluttered her eyes. “Can I help you?” She asked sweetly.

Sighing the old chieftain gave the sows some orders and the three sows gently nudged Pinkie and gestured for her to follow them. She bounced after them and they led her to a large building on the edge of the village. The building formed a large dome over a massive spring in the middle, the natural heat radiating from the spring filled the air with steam. The boars had begun decorating the interior with strange coloured torches that let out a sweet multicolored smoke. Pinkie moved to help the boars, but one of the sows intercepted her and pushed her towards a room to the side. Inside they began dressing Pinkie in strange clothing made of hardened wood that had spikes on the back of it as well as giving her spikes on the sides of her barrel and flank. The wood was finely painted with strange symbols that glimmered and seemed to shift in the flickering prismatic light of the torches. When they had finished Pinkie looked like almost like a strange multicoloured hedgehog with a pink core.

“Thanks for the cool clothing... I've never had wooden clothing before but why are there three of each of you?” Pinkie giggled and swayed. Her tongue hung out as she panted, her eyes half closed. “Do any of you find it kinda hard to breath? I-” Pinkie yawned, her mouth expanding to massive sizes with the sows staring in awe, or perhaps fear. Pinkie couldn't tell. “I mean I'm starting to get really dizzy and hungry too. I hope you guys have got some food cooking cause I could eat an entire MMM right now. Maybe even two.”

The sows finished dressing her and brought her back to the central chamber. In addition to the multicoloured smoke a large horn had been added, but that's not what got Pinkie's attention. For the boars had brought in the tables and upon those tables was an exotic spread of fruits Pinkie had never seen, delicious looking stews, and many dishes full of spicy fried veggies. When the boars saw Pinkie they all cheered and pulled her into the festivities. They danced, sang, and played strange games. But most of all they ate. Or at least Pinkie did. She couldn't turn around without a boar pushing a new and strange dish in her face for her to try. Pinkie tried to introduce her own games to the boars, but of course they couldn't understand her and after a while Pinkie gave up and just enjoyed the festivities.

The party lasted a long time and the sun was rising by the time it started to die down. The chief boar showed up and the sows directed Pinkie to stand directly in front of the hot spring. By this point Pinkie was so stuffed full of food and dazed by the strange smoke she barely bounced at all while she waited. The rest of the boars all grabbed torches and began to chant.

“Komdu fram! Komdu og Samþykktu fórn okkar ó voldugasta skepna alheimsinins, Jogund!” They bellowed again and again. As they chanted they stomped their hooves in a rhythmic beat. They chanted louder and louder as the tempo to the beat got faster and faster. Finally it ended when the chief boar sounded the massive horn they brought in earlier. The noise was deep and powerful, giving Pinkie a funny feeling in her stomach as the vibrations passed through her. For a few brief seconds there was silence then Pinkie whirled around as she heard splashing coming from the hot spring behind her. Arising from the large pool was the most gigantic sea serpent that Pinkie had ever seen. Correction; arising from the pool was the head of the largest sea serpent Pinkie had ever seen as nothing else could fit in the building. It's scales were as black as a midnight sky and it's eyes were two topaz coloured orbs that were bigger then any pony, or three, put together. It's eyes glanced towards Pinkie who just sat there, her mouth wide open and eyes opened wide.

“What in the world is an Equestrian pony doing here?” It said in perfect Equestrian.

Author's Note:

Lesson learned; it's really hard to write Pinkie Pie when she doesn't have anyone to talk to.