The small form of a young one scurried through the glimmering halls of a castle. He was equine in shape, yes, but a cursory glance would confirm that he was anything but. He had a cyan carapace which was smooth and shimmered in the light, not a single crack, gap, or imperfection was visible. A curved horn jutted from his forehead, which gently sloped upwards. His compound eyes were a platinum white, shining with innocence and life, and his backplate, which periodically opened and closed in excitement as the young creature ran, was a similar white. A platinum circlet sat around his head, a cyan gem in the middle, just below his horn. Two small bumps emerged from the sides of his head. They were pure white, and looked jagged, like the tips of mandibles.
"Father, mother! You have to see this!" He cried excitedly as he entered a new room. A study. Two similar creatures sat in leather chairs near a fireplace. One was blue in color, with orange eyes. She wore a purple dress that was covered in runes and designs, the bottom of the skirt was translucent allowing one to see her hind legs. A small butterfly wing-like head fin ran down the back of her head, making it look like she had a mane. Her eyes quickly darted to her child as he entered, a bright smile on her face.
The other was wearing a platinum crown, his carapace yellow, with orange compact eyes. He wore a green robe, with similar runes to that of his wife. When the younger creature had entered, he had his face buried grimly in his hooves, but as soon as he heard the voice of his son, he had quickly perked up, a small smile coming to his face. He noticeably lacked antlers and was the same size as his mother.
"Oh my! What do you need to see?" The mother asked with a warm smile, holding out her hooves for her son.
"Look, mother! I'm growing Antlers!" The young creature cried, turning his head slightly to the side, allowing them to see the small nubs on the sides of his head.
The two elders couldn't help but gasp with excitement, their eyes widening in joy.
"Oh look at my special little guy!" Mother said, pulling him closer and nuzzling his cheek. A blush came to his cheek as he tried to pull away from her, eyeing pleadingly turned to his father. His father meanwhile beamed down at his child with pride, rising to his hooves, and approaching.
"Never in a million years would I have considered one of my line being a Vurion, or even perhaps a Kes!" He said, reaching down and tussling his son's head. "This is such good news my son, you would not even believe how I feel."
The young one opened his mouth, but before any words could come out, the door opened, and two guards in silver armor walked in.
"My Satrap. We need you in the throne room. It's time." One said.
Dread came to the older male's face, he grimaced darkly, letting out a sigh. "Stay here. Please." He said, his lips quivering as he slowly walked out of the room, following after the guards.
The younger one pulled himself closer into his mother's chest and watched as he left. He didn't know what was wrong... how could he? Yet... a feeling of dread gripped his soul. Something told him everything was going to change. And soon.
"So... where are we goin' again?" Derek asked as he and Johan trudged through the forest back in the direction they came.
"My castle. I have to send a letter to Princess Celestia as soon as possible. You are the first male alicorn anyone has seen in at least a thousand years!" Twilight said, staring at the green pony.
Derek's eyes widened for a second before a devious smile came to his face. "The only male Alicorn you say?" He smirked. He was interrupted in this line of thinking by a harsh elbow to his side from Johan.
"So, how did you guys even get here? I am genuinely curious. For instance, I don't think I've ever heard of a sentient deer before. With all due respect, all of the other deer here in Equestria are... well... animals?" Twilight asked, turning to look primarily at Johan.
"Oh um... no offense taken I guess. The last thing I remember was seeing this car-" Johan stated. A sudden cry from Twilight cut him off.
"Car?!? As in those things humans have?!?" She shouted, skidding to a halt.
Johan and Derek turned to each other with raised eyebrows. "Humans exist in this place?" Derek asked, stopping and turning back to her.
"Yes! Well... kinda... sort of." Twilight stammered. "I can certainly take you there just... not yet. I have to get you to my castle. There is this magical mirror there that I can use to take you home. It just... only actually activates once every thirty moons."
Johan blinked twice. "Thirty moons? Is that... like a measure of time or something?"
Twilight nodded. "Yeah. It's a measure of time. Two weeks long to be more specific." She said, slowly starting back up her pace, beckoning the two to follow her.
"Oh. Back where I'm from, we call that a Fortnight. At least until the game came around and all of those nose-picking, squeaky voice having kids ruined that word permanently." Derek chuckled.
"Wait a sec..." Johan came to a stop. "Sixty weeks? That's over a year!"
"Wait what?" Derek's eyes widened as he looked back at his friend. "You don't mean-?
"That we are going to be stuck here for a year?!?" Johan shouted, his voice shrill and panicked. Both of their eyes snapped to Twilight pleadingly.
"Oh, yeah... that is a long time. Guess I should have explained better." Twilight replied awkwardly with a nervous chuckle. "Don't worry. The last time the portal was active was a year ago today actually. Don't worry, in a month's time it'll work again."
"Oh thank the lord." Johan sighed, wiping sweat from his brow. "I really don't want to be stuck like a deer for a year.
Eventually, the party left the forest, and after a short walk, they arrived at the top of a small hill, overlooking a small town with thatched roofs. A massive crystal structure, that wasn't keeping with the village's rustic aesthetic in the slightest, towered over everything else. It was in the vague shape of a tree, with a massive gate in the middle.
"Gentlecolts." Twilight started with a smile, gesturing to the town. "Welcome to Ponyville!"
The two former humans blinked for a couple of seconds, turning to each other than to her.
"That name sucks," they replied in perfect unison.
And now we wait for the townsponies to lose their minds I think. And what other things might happen on the side...
im just looking at the last thing on the checklist and thinking that johan being terrifyed and screaming his way to god of nature accidentily would be funny
Hahahaha, it really does
You missed an opportunity to mentally torture your readers...deer.
Chapter 1:
I like it so far. Classic cartoon humor. Nice.
The awkward moment caused by the small wings made me smile with nostalgic amusement.
The very start is not very...original, but standard is gud nuff. I think they should have spent an hour or so before being able to actually move, but nothing wrong with that either.
Chapter 2:
I wonder how annoying that would be and how the exorcism would be performed.
Chapter 3:
Twilight is one of those characters who should use the correct word. I might be splitting hairs...
*sigh* Opinion: Why cant we have stories without that blasted mirror? You can put EqG on that checklist.
Mmmyeah, I think I will keep reading...
10724034
Not gonna spoil much, but EQG will play such a small role in this story that they are only going to have a single chapter appearance and then be promptly abandoned due to reasons that I will not spoil.
Is it a changeling?
A what?
I thought I was 2 weeks.
Is this a different version of the castle or something?
Why?
10724288
1. Maybe
2. Will probably be explained later
3. A moon is 2 weeks. She said that it would take 30 moons.
4. I don't know
5. 'Cause it's a bad horse pun like Manettan or Neighpon. It would be like calling a town with humans in it "humansburg" or something
10724247
don't have to explain to me. It probably won't be there world so they will head back to Equestria to find a way home
10724288
For the first question I’m pretty sure those characters are deer. A deer civilisation beyond the boundaries of Equestria.
10724582
Ohh.
10724592
Ok.
10724592
They have a carapace and bug eyes lol
10724633
Damn I completely missed that. It almost immediately says it.
10724615
Sorry to have misled you. I’m completely wrong and those are Changelings.
Might I remind Derek and Johan about Humansville?
Also:
This isn't DBZ, we should be safe
10724800
It’s ok.
10724965
Naruto, Sometimes Jojo, My Hero Academia, Hunter x Hunter, One Piece, Bleach.
We will never be safe my friend. We will never be safe.
10724965
Oh gosh, your comment and my reply just gave me another idea for The Terrible Isekai/Displaced Anime Checklist!!! (Trademark)
A character having a super long flashback in the middle of a fight scene and then suddenly getting a massive power boost because important backstory triggers some kind of memeorty.
10725342
Your welcome?
10724965
You said the forbidden no no word, and now we'll never be safe!
10774154
I had NO warning. none
So when's the next chapter
10816191
Soontm
I though a lunar cycle is about a month long