Chapter Twenty Seven: When Cakes are at Stake
Chapter Twenty Seven: When Cakes Are at Stake
Written by TheCrimsoNDM
If only Luna could stay by her soft buttercup’s side all night long. Sadly even with marriage only two days away she still had duties to attend to. Leaving the sleeping form of her lover behind she made her way out into the castle’s halls. It was late into the evening and she could sense that mostly everypony was already asleep. Their dreams creating a tingle in the air, one she could easily interact with to create nightmares if she so desired or dreams of pure pleasure and ecstasy. She had an idea based on the events from earlier that evening. Even she couldn’t help but to notice how the brides were already starting to get jealous of one another. She knew this was a possibility but to think it happened so soon. This could be a problem.
A few well placed dreams could help out very much with these negative feelings and she had an idea of just such a dream. Of course that was going to have to wait as she sensed one pony was awake, one very important pony. Walking through the halls she could almost feel their eyes on her from every twist and turn. It would be fine if she didn’t also feel hostile intent from them. If only she had realized that her earlier actions as fun and passionate as they were, would only end up causing this problem.
She rounded a hall and stopped as the pristine white fur and flowing mane stood to block her path. A cruel smile lay upon Celestia’s lips. Before Celestia could speak a servant walked past and nearly whispered. “Two Hundred and Twelve.”
Celestia’s smile only grew wider. “Dear sister, how have you been?”
Luna didn’t’ have time to think of what the strange number had meant. “I am quite fine.”
“Are you okay? Hungry perhaps?”
“We are alicorns, dear sister. We are both always hungry and not always for food.”
Celestia didn’t take the bait. “Perhaps I could offer you some cake. I had this wonderful pink icing strawberry cake. If you wish we could share it.”
Luna swallowed. “Tis fine, I should be off on my duty today.”
Luna tried to walk past but found herself meeting a golden energy wall. “Please, Luna, if I am allowed to rest on my duties then I feel you should be allowed to as well.”
Luna looked over at her, the cold look in her eyes and the cruel smile both things to fear. “What is it that thou could want from me?”
Celestia’s smile grew. “Why dear sister, whatever could you mean?”
“Thou already knows that I ate the cake. What else would this be for?”
Celestia leaned over, their muzzles nearly touching from the close proximity. “Oh, you did? But it was a special cake for rainy days, and poor Rarity had such a rainy day today.”
Luna swallowed. “But why, she is so beautiful, she should not have any days with any amount of liquid falling from the skies.”
Celestia pulled away and made a grand gesture with her wing. “That is what I said. Of course now she is sad, and I fear without my special cake I could not cheer her up.”
Luna nodded. “I shall go to her quarters immediately to help. I feel she must be awake as her dreams have not yet begun.”
Celestia looked sideways. “She is not there. I have checked. I do know where she is though.”
“Where is she? I must go to her rescue immediately, no bride of mine shall be left wanting.”
Celestia looked toward the rear of the castle. “She is in the pond outside of the castle. Enjoying a late night swim, but her heart still aches. With me being unable to please her, perhaps you could.”
Luna’s horn lit up. “I will do so immediately.”
With a teleport Luna found herself in the courtyard and at the pond. The hedges were tall, taller than Luna even. A few statues of ponies stood about. The pond itself was fairly large, filled with a few large tropical fish and clean see through the water. Yet Rarity was nowhere in sight. Strange, did she leave already?
A rumbling sound was heard behind Luna. Along with a croak so loud it was almost painful to her ears. Turning around Luna saw the origin of the sound. It was a frog, but one made entirely from cake and frosting. Its eyes like two large cherries stared right down at Luna. Its mouth opened and a tongue of icing lashed out wrapping around her and dragging her into its mouth. Luna cried out as she was swallowed whole by the frosted monstrosity.
***
Celestia watched from her balcony as Luna was swallowed by the cake frog monster. In her telekinetic aura she held both a drink and a bucket of popcorn. She sipped at her drink and smiled. “This was a fantastic idea.”
Spike grabbed a clawful of popcorn and ate it. “Wasn’t my idea, but hey, I’ll watch any crap show. I’m hoping she loses it like Twilight.”
Celestia laughed. “Oh, if only we were so lucky. She will find the escape soon enough. Her embarrassment will be known for ages. Nopony eats my cake and gets away with it.”
Spike nodded. “That’s exactly why I only eat cake when it’s offered. Too scary otherwise.”
“That is good thinking. At least, better than my sisters.”
The two of them laughed and continued eating popcorn while they waited for Luna’s exit. Once she figured out what she was going to have to do to escape that was. Celestia couldn’t wait.
***
It took Luna nearly twenty minutes of struggling in the bowels of the cake fiend. The insides were magically enchanted so she couldn’t even eat her way out and she tried. Instead she had to climb through a winding tunnel and through a thick collection of melted chocolate fudge. Once she reached the end of the tunnel she crawled her way out, and with a push from the cake monster she came out along with what had to be ten gallons of melted fudge.
Sitting in the moonlight covered in the brown sweet chocolate sludge she looked over to realize what side she had crawled out of. Being excreted by the rear end of a giant cake monster was perhaps the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to her. Even that one time got violently ill in the throne room was nothing compared to the humiliation she now felt.
The cake frog for its part fell over and melted before her eyes, perhaps the strain was too much. Of course realizing now what she must have looked like, even she could not be goaded into eating the fudge. Instead she needed a cleansing bath, one with the hottest of waters and perhaps holy herbs to cleanse not just her mind and body but her spirit as well as she had been defiled beyond measure by that confectionary construct.
Celestia had certainly gotten her back for the cake theft and then some. Of course by going so far, all Celestia did was guarantee a war. A war of pranks the likes of which had not been seen in over one thousand years was about to commence. Hopefully their mutual weddings would survive in the process.
Luna attempted to stand, the sludge beneath her slipped and slid as she fell face first back into the pile of chocolate. Just chocolate. The taste on her mouth was chocolate. The smell was chocolate. If she kept thinking of it only as chocolate she would not freak out.
Her horn flared and she teleported. Straight into the largest bath in the castle. Screw walking, her dignity had already been soiled, what else could go wrong?
The howling laughter from up in the balconies of the castle were not lost on her either.
***
The howls of laughter coming both Celestia and Spike were perhaps uncalled for, but they were at least genuine. Celestia couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed so hard. The entire room was growing warm as a result and her body might have begun to glow as golden tears of joy ran down her face. Spike laughed so hard he began to hiccup burst of green fire.
All in all tonight was very successful. If Luna was going to force her into a marriage such as this, the least she could do was get some payback and even if Luna retaliated, perhaps the retaliation would be enough to cancel the whole affair. That or the ponies who were forming unknown battle lines were going to do that. Either way Celestia could feel herself only a few steps from victory but she had to be careful. In the end it had to be Luna’s decision to stop the marriages. That way Celestia could play the role of the supportive elder sister and act as though she was only going along with it for Luna’s sake.
One thing she hadn’t counted on with her joyous laughter was that she and Spike were not quite alone in this room. Twilight rolled over, got out of bed and marched up to them, her hooves making stomping sounds with every step. She smiled at them as Celestia and Spike both attempted to stifle their laughter.
“Princess, Spike, I love you both very much you know, but it is the middle of the night, and you two are just a teensy, weensy bit loud. Could you two please keep it down a little?”
Celestia tried to choke back her laughter. “Ok-kay.”
Twilight smiled and looked over the balcony edge at the courtyard below. Her eyes widened. “Holy! What crapped all over the courtyard? Did a dragon do a fly by pooping? And why is there a pony imprint in it?”
That was it, Celestia and Spike burst into an avalanche of uncontrolled laughter. Poor Twilight would forever remain none the wiser about this. Her shock and horror only grew as the laughter continued. She must have thought them mad. Celestia only laughed harder as Twilight tried to ask questions. Eventually she gave up and went back to bed. Activating a silence bubble around her to make sure they would not keep her up later than she already was.
***
Having had a nice hot bath and washing all of the just chocolate out of her everything, Luna was refreshed and ready to tackle this subject in a most dignified and mature way. In fact she was busy scrounging around the kitchen looking for just the right tools for the trade. Something had to be here to help her in this.
Celestia was so clever, so clever indeed. The cake frog she had created, actually took most of the cake supply left in the castle. So even if she wanted a late night snack she’d be hard pressed to find it. Still she knew her sister better than anypony else. There was no way she’d leave the castle void of cake, not in a thousand years of her rulership had that happened even once.
In fact they had an entire cake room. Staring at it, the place was the most empty of delicious sugary cake, but there were still a few good cakes remaining in stasis, ready to be freshly eaten at a moment’s notice. What she was about to do was going to hurt, even Luna hated to think of this. Still she realized more than anypony that sacrifices had to be made in a war of pranks.
At the very least she could say she was doing something good here. These cakes were all so sugary and fattening. How would she or Celestia fit into their wedding dresses if she did not in fact take their health seriously? A cold blue light enveloped her horn. For the good of Equestria, of their waistline, and of the prank war, she would make sure they all ate healthy…
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This is not going to end well...
Luna: (Dripping with JUST Chocolate sauce) Of course you realize, THIS means WAR.
*melodramatic soap opera organ intensifies*
So i have Learn 2 Things, First thing never Take cake form the Sun you will Not know what Hit you, nr 2 Luna Does Not know what Kind of war she is about to start With Tia and Pinkie for she is going to learn of the healthy Cake aswell
, the war shall be the one to end the world
Oh...
Oh no.
nice work.
Celestia, now you fudged up.
This is not going to end well ,,, especially once Pinkie learns of the cake ban
from both
Perfect time to change up the shenanigans. The horny pony shenanigans were good, but any shenanigans done too long kind of stop being shenanigans. Now some sibling rivalry shenanigans, this are good shenanigans. I'm definitely looking forward to what new types of shenanigans you might get them into. Shenanigans.
....I think I'm on Luna's side now.